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Depression

12467…24

Comments

  • #152
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    stupidusername wrote: »
    have to say the same. it's a hard thing to do to put yourself out there like this especially in a place that is so well known for it's lack of seriousness. hard to imagine this won't bite me in the arse in some way or another.

    Stop it. That way of thinking and posting won't help people who might want to share their stories. It's a fantastic thing that you were all able to.


  • #153
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    Sorry, Mussolini, we're all demading all sorts of responses from you!

    What I noticed was that your response to bluecat was that you thought depression was something that some people were just predisposed to and no fault of their own and bit of acceptance and understanding was called for but your response to OG was to say in short, that you felt you needed to have a "reason" to be depressed as though you don't deserve understanding (that's my understanding of it, please correct me if I'm wrong). Can you not apply the reasoning of your first post to yourself? You seem to be unjustly harsh towards yourself.
    I suppose, I guess I have been looking for the "silver bullet" so to speak. It would be hard to accept that there isnt much I can do myself to change it, tbh I dont actually know if I have depression or not, or if it is really just something in my life that is making me down, ah I dunno its all a bit scary


  • #154
    Princess Peach
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    I really don't mind talking about it with online friends, but I'm still a bit cagey about discussing it with my friends from home. I have tried, it was a long time before most of them even knew a thing. They all know about my medication now, only 1 knows about my counselling and I really try not to bring it up much. Can't really explain why, but I am making progress in the talking.

    The only friend I really talk to about it suffers from depression herself, so maybe I think she will just be a lot more understanding. I guess also I don't want my other friends to treat me any differently, or think that I'm looking for sympathy or something. But it gets hard to hide it and I am trying to be more open about it.


  • #155
    Sardonicat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,408 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    I suppose, I guess I have been looking for the "silver bullet" so to speak. It would be hard to accept that there isnt much I can do myself to change it, tbh I dont actually know if I have depression or not, or if it is really just something in my life that is making me down, ah I dunno its all a bit scary
    I hear you.

    Speaking form my own experience only, accepting that I am, for want of a better phrase, predisposed to depression, was a tough thing to do. I also found that while I may not be able to do anything about that predisposition, I am able to deal with it when it lands. I'm not going to go into too much detail as to how I deal with it here as, A) I do not want it to be misconstrued as advice to anyone, and B) what works for me might be disastorous for someone else. But, after a long time, I have learned how to cope with it. But it wasn't until I acknowledged the basic issue (depression) that I was able to do that. Like you, I'm not sure of the causes or reasons for it. I'm not saying that you have depression, I'm in no way qualified to do that. But I can empathise a lot with your posts and I know that you don't deseve to feel like **** all the time. I'll leave that with you.


  • #156
    opinion guy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭opinion guy


    Hey guys now might be a good point to make you all aware of the Personal Issues forum.

    You can post using your username or anonymously if you wish:

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=127


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  • #157
    bluecatmorgana
    Registered Users Posts: 447 ✭✭bluecatmorgana


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    I have no idea, I don't know much about depression and what causes it.

    depression can be caused by your biological makeup which makes it uncontrollable, in other words by making your life better wont necessarily make your depression go away. I think personally that i have depression caused by environmental/circumstancial issues and biological issues. Unfortunately biological depression usually needs medication to deal with it and it doesnt work everytime but it might.


  • #158
    t0mm13b
    Registered Users Posts: 608 ✭✭✭t0mm13b


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    Sorry, Mussolini, we're all demading all sorts of responses from you!........You seem to be unjustly harsh towards yourself.

    @Sardonicat: I used to constantly be harsh and beat myself up in the head.... procrastinate and get nothing done... this had affected the whole outlook and the experience with depression, it did not help at all retrospectively, in hindsight,
    what could I do.... upbringing is one factor I can definitely pencil in.... "being pushed academically" and to "fail is to let others down" hence the beating up in the head and being self-critical and harsh......


  • #159
    Star Bingo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,366 ✭✭✭Star Bingo


    AshSmith wrote: »
    horribly promiscuous

    just wonderin how many more depressed folk as using this as a means to sate their misery? or is it the root cause! seems it may actually be detrimental to one's condition :pac: even a hole is a goal not worth pursuing.. :(


  • #160
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    Princess Peach wrote: »
    I really don't mind talking about it with online friends, but I'm still a bit cagey about discussing it with my friends from home. I have tried, it was a long time before most of them even knew a thing. They all know about my medication now, only 1 knows about my counselling and I really try not to bring it up much. Can't really explain why, but I am making progress in the talking.

    The only friend I really talk to about it suffers from depression herself, so maybe I think she will just be a lot more understanding. I guess also I don't want my other friends to treat me any differently, or think that I'm looking for sympathy or something. But it gets hard to hide it and I am trying to be more open about it.
    +1


  • #161
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    opinion guy wrote: »
    Hey guys now might be a good point to make you all aware of the Personal Issues forum.

    You can post using your username or anonymously if you wish:

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=127
    I would point out that that is not the place to go if you are feeling suicidal, as you get trolls there too, and the people arent capable of advising you as they are not trained, you will be instructed to seek professional help.


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  • #162
    opinion guy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭opinion guy


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    I suppose, I guess I have been looking for the "silver bullet" so to speak. It would be hard to accept that there isnt much I can do myself to change it, tbh I dont actually know if I have depression or not, or if it is really just something in my life that is making me down, ah I dunno its all a bit scary

    Change is scary....
    New things are scary....

    ....at first. But then you get used to them, and they are not scary anymore.

    You sound like you've reached the point where you've realised one approach is not working for you and you are realising that, but have not quite decided on what new approach to take ?


  • #163
    Wurly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,095 ✭✭✭Wurly


    Lads, this thread makes for really fantastic reading. Fair play to everyone sharing their stories. It's heartwarming for people to be supporting each other like this. If conversations like this happened more often and on a wider scale, there would be no stigma.


  • #164
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    opinion guy wrote: »
    Change is scary....
    New things are scary....

    ....at first. But then you get used to them, and they are not scary anymore.

    You sound like you've reached the point where you've realised one approach is not working for you and you are realising that, but have not quite decided on what new approach to take ?
    Yeah, Ive ran out of things to blame it on, my new approach will to be keep going and hope it goes away.


  • #165
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I've no real problem with discussing this at all. I'm 26 and have been dealing with depression since I was 15. It's one of those things that you'll know when you experience it; feeling rotten all the time, no desire to do anything, no goals or ambitions. I didn't do particularly well in my leaving cert thanks to it, thought there was no point and didn't do as well as I could have.

    Thankfully I haven't had suicidal thoughts in a while as I have a method of controlling them - I'm very close to my family (well except my sister, she hates me) and it would badly affect them if I were to take my own life. So I plod on from one day to another doing the same thing all the time and locking myself away from the outside world.

    I have tried to seek help in the past but old habits die hard. I've been so independent for so long that trying to be more social is proving very tough. I went to the AH beers in Ron Blacks last year; met some very nice people there but had to literally drag myself out to do it.


  • #166
    opinion guy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭opinion guy


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Yeah, Ive ran out of things to blame it on, my new approach will to be keep going and hope it goes away.

    Well, often times the things at the root of these feelings are the very things we don't want to think about. You think ?


  • #167
    Victor
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,490 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    t0mm13b wrote: »
    AFAIK the mental health act is pretty old and outdated and early 20th century... we're in the 21st century now, ffs....
    No, there is a modern act.

    Mental Health Act, 2001 http://www.irishstatutebook.ie/2001/en/act/pub/0025/index.html


  • #168
    Whispered
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,772 ✭✭✭✭Whispered


    Karsini wrote: »
    So I plod on from one day to another doing the same thing all the time and locking myself away from the outside world.
    I do this. I'm not depressed, but I can be antisocial :o. I dread groups of people, I feel like I'm not as funny, pretty, interesting as everyone else, it's an effort to speak to people and I sometimes struggle with conversation. I also get annoyed at people so easily. If I've had a few drinks I come out of my shell a little bit, then wake up the next day and have often cried about conversations where I "looked silly" or I "bored everyone" or "accidently insulted someone". If I overheard these conversations between 2 people I wouldn't think twice about it, but I cringe when I have them. It would be easier to go lock myself away and if I was left to it I probably would. Thankfully my lovely husband insists on going out all the time and bringing me with him. Must go thank him.


  • #169
    Stained Class
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,808 ✭✭✭Stained Class


    Great thread guys.

    Some of the posts are a bit hard to read.

    Mental illness is one of the big taboo subjects alright.

    Never had any trouble that way myself, thankfully.

    Nonetheless, it's a subject that's dominated my life growing up.

    One of my parents has major mental health issues.

    This caused us no end of grief & affected myself & the rest of the family profoundly & permanently.

    Adding insult to injury, was the expectation that I myself was expected by some people to end up the same way.


  • #170
    ilovesleep
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭ilovesleep


    I dont know.

    Im so afraid and fearful right now as to whats happening in Ireland. I feel awful and rotten. Tired and exhausted. Breaking out in tears everyday. All I want to do is sleep forever.


  • #171
    Star Bingo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,366 ✭✭✭Star Bingo


    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then? cos the definitions are conflicting. the 'reality' man insists on shaping can 'depress' us all; particularly in our current climate when it all goes t!ts up.. may well be better locking yourself away tbh - but is it really a chemical imbalance which only prescribed medication can aid? because those things depressed me even more.. n trust me i was depressed! ? otherwise melancholy thanks.. or a sort of.. sober sombriety. out of choice - but who do you listen to on such matters? who do you choose to ignore. when it stems from the self; has it to do with the self? sure there's contributary outside factors but.. the solution lies within yourself.


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  • #172
    Wurly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,095 ✭✭✭Wurly


    Star Bingo wrote: »
    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then? cos the definitions are conflicting. the 'reality' man insists on shaping can 'depress' us all; particularly in our current climate when it all goes t!ts up.. may well be better locking yourself away tbh - but is it really a chemical imbalance which only prescribed medication can aid? because those things depressed me even more.. n trust me i was depressed! ? otherwise melancholy thanks.. or a sort of.. sober sombriety. out of choice - but who do you listen to on such matters? who do you choose to ignore. when it stems from the self; has it to do with the self? the solution lies within yourself.

    I cant give you a definitive definition of 'depression' but I can give you a definition of 'depressing' - your blatant ignorance as shown on this thread.


  • #173
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Depression means many things to many people and can manifest itself in many different ways.


  • #174
    JONJO THE MISER
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 12,333 ✭✭✭✭JONJO THE MISER


    I wouldn't say i suffer from depression but being a gambler and online poker player i have suffered greatly from short term depression so i can imagine what it must be like to constantly have it.
    My worst was a 1 year and 1/2 ago when i lost the guts of €6500 in less than 24 hours, i was in a black hole for 2 weeks after that.


  • #175
    Victor
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,490 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    Star Bingo wrote: »
    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then?
    Depression is different to the like of an infection where we can point to one single things and say "Yes, that's it". They aren't certain on what exactly causes it (if they did they could fix it "just like that").

    Its for the patient and doctor to come up with a diagnosis - you can't self diagnose.

    I don't think there is one fixed definition.

    www.vhi.ie/pdf/employers/dep/HowtodealwithGrief.pdf
    Symptoms of depression include:
    • A sad, anxious, or "empty" mood that won't go away
    • Loss of interest in what you used to enjoy
    • Low energy, fatigue, feeling "slowed down"
    • Changes in sleep patterns
    • Loss of appetite, weight loss, or weight gain
    • Trouble concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
    • Feeling hopeless or gloomy
    • Feeling guilty, worthless, or helpless
    • Recurring aches and pains that don't respond to treatment

    http://ie.reachout.com/find/articles/depression?gclid=CM_br9WQkKYCFY4f4QodKBljaQ
    When someone is depressed they may feel a range of things including:

    * feeling hopeless or helpless
    * losing interest in activities they usually enjoy
    * a lack of energy
    * changes in sleeping and eating patterns
    * crying a lot or feeling agitated
    * high use of alcohol or other drugs
    * losing their temper
    * withdrawing from the group
    * headaches or stomach aches
    * feeling empty
    * feeling anxious.

    You need to have at least 5 of those symptoms on and on-going basis over several weeks.


  • #176
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    Hmm, I would have all of them except for the drugs one and the drink one


  • #177
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    The one thing I find odd about those two lists is that it does not mention suicidal thoughts, which I would have assumed to be a big factor with depression.

    Unfortunately I have had all of them, bar the drink and drugs.


  • #178
    Oranage2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,128 ✭✭✭✭Oranage2


    Star Bingo wrote: »
    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then?

    Well before this thread I thought depression was a thing people got from being stuck in a ruth that didn't have motivation to do anything a vicious circle, after reading this thread I don't really know what depression is? I still amazed people with jobs, boy/girl friends, people with college etc... can suffer, so this thread has made me less ignorant and more aware.

    Dont really know what to say so good luck y'all and hope good things happen


  • #179
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Oranage2 wrote: »
    Well before this thread I thought depression was a thing people got from being stuck in a ruth that didn't have motivation to do anything a vicious circle, after reading this thread I don't really know what depression is? I still amazed people with jobs, boy/girl friends, people with college etc... can suffer, so this thread has made me less ignorant and more aware.

    Dont really know what to say so good luck y'all and hope good things happen

    Then this thread has worked :)

    I genuinely hope others have also been made more aware, especially about their own possible depression and that they will go and get help.


  • #180
    opinion guy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭opinion guy


    Trí wrote: »
    I cant give you a definitive definition of 'depression' but I can give you a definition of 'depressing' - your blatant ignorance as shown on this thread.

    Eh... I for one am not convinced that Star Bingo is trolling. I think he/she may well be genuine.


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  • #181
    arybvtcw0eolkf
    Closed Accounts Posts: 24,878 ✭✭✭✭arybvtcw0eolkf


    I have to say, genuinely this IMO is probably one of the best threads ever in After Hours.

    I honestly can not think of any which can top it, 'bravo' OP.

    Well done, you've to be commended for this one.


  • #182
    Wurly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,095 ✭✭✭Wurly


    opinion guy wrote: »
    Eh... I for one am not convinced that Star Bingo is trolling. I think he/she may well be genuine.
    I never said he was trolling, I said I found his blatant ignorance depressing. That's my opinion, opinion guy.;)


  • #183
    Dionysus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,420 ✭✭✭Dionysus


    Star Bingo wrote: »
    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then?

    Those "dark clouds" (for want of a better description) that consume one's entire mind with a travesty of bleakness, despair, aimlessness and hopelessness? And when you hit this 'dark clouds' period you know you've gone beyond 'sad' or merely 'feeling under the weather'. You've passed a threshold somewhere. It's a good while since I've been there - and fortunately I've been there only twice in my life - but when I arrived there I can say without fear of contradiction that I knew it was very different to anything I had ever experienced. Somebody who has been there much more recently will remember the details of their 'dark clouds' better than I now remember mine, or want to.


  • #184
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    opinion guy wrote: »
    Well, often times the things at the root of these feelings are the very things we don't want to think about. You think ?
    Perhaps, I honestly cant think of a reason why I feel the way I do though.

    Thats why Im not to keen to discuss it with family, it would be like this:

    "Ive been feeling really really down and sad"

    "Why?"

    "Eh, I dunno"

    "Well try to snap out of it, go do some sport or something"


  • #185
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    ^^^ that attitude is what stops people talking about it.

    how are people so ignorant? I mean if I don't know anything about a condition I don't assume it's not serious or difficult.

    My family wouldn't even get that far :rolleyes: if I said I was feeling low all I'd get is a 'mmmm' from my dad, possibly a question as to whether or not should go to the doctor. that'd be the end of it.


  • #186
    opinion guy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭opinion guy


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Perhaps, I honestly cant think of a reason why I feel the way I do though.

    Thats why Im not to keen to discuss it with family, it would be like this:

    "Ive been feeling really really down and sad"

    "Why?"

    "Eh, I dunno"

    "Well try to snap out of it, go do some sport or something"

    Well the family might just surprise you you know. But taking this as you expect - well see that maybe cause your family don't know how to deal with these things ? If you and I were having that conversation I'd ask you more questions or try to get to the root of it some other way. But then I'm used to this kind of stuff. Back when I wasn't used to this stuff I probably would say the same as your folks. So maybe your family aren't the best people to bring it up with ? Especially if there is some tension in the family or anything ??
    Anyone else you're close to ?


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  • #187
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Unfortunately there are people who are ignorant to depression, or still live with the guilt of expressing one's feelings, which is a hand-me-down from the previous generation, I feel. However I think this is slowly changing and hopefully this thread can be a small stepping stone to awareness and acknowledgement of depression being a reality.


  • #188
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    I think with my parents it would be "ah you are just a bit down, you will be grand!" The subliminal thought would be "my son couldn't possibly be fecked up in the head"


  • #189
    Sardonicat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,408 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Perhaps, I honestly cant think of a reason why I feel the way I do though.

    Thats why Im not to keen to discuss it with family, it would be like this:

    "Ive been feeling really really down and sad"

    "Why?"

    "Eh, I dunno"

    "Well try to snap out of it, go do some sport or something"
    Sorry to hear about that. I think we all can identify with it. But no-one here has said that to you, have they? And there are people in the real world (not that I don't exist in the real world or anything) who will be able to let you talk this out. The trick is finding them. You are at university, yes? There are peopleyou can talk to there through student services. In my experience, the person who helped me the most was the college chaplain (and I'm not religious at all). Don't rule out people whose job it is to support people through difficult times. This may not be the route for you, but there are a number of options, all you can do is try them out.The LOngterm Illness thread on depression and anxiety is a great place on boards for a bit of moral support and practical tips. Whatever is available to you, try it. anyone not giving constructive support try to ignore. Tough when it's your family though, I know that.


  • #190
    Tchaikovsky
    Registered Users Posts: 2,185 ✭✭✭Tchaikovsky


    Oranage2 wrote: »
    I still amazed people with jobs, boy/girl friends, people with college etc... can suffer, so this thread has made me less ignorant and more aware.
    Well you just have to look at the long list of famous sufferers of depression to see that that isn't the case; Kurt Cobain being a case in point. He was doing what he loved, rich, famous, married with a baby but deep down he was seriously depressed.

    I've had it for over half of my life, but a good chunk of that I spent without talking to anyone or actually realising that I was depressed.

    It's hard for me being in Ireland though- I'm sure it's the case for many in similar positions- I've been on anti-depressants for over 4 years now with no chance of talking to a psychiatrist due to the HSE rectruitment ban. It makes those ads they have on tv even more infuriating.
    Counsellors and medication cost too much, although I did talk to the campus counsellors when I was a student.
    I feel that I'm basically on my own in trying to tackle this now and I'm coming off the anti-depressants. I go through good and bad spells and I'm focusing of pinpointing the onset of my bad spell and doing things to eradicate it as soon as possible.


  • #191
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Tchaikovsky wrote: »
    Well you just have to look at the long list of famous sufferers of depression to see that that isn't the case; Kurt Cobain being a case in point. He was doing what he loved, rich, famous, married with a baby but deep down he was seriously depressed.

    I've had it for over half of my life, but a good chunk of that I spent without talking to anyone or actually realising that I was depressed.

    It's hard for me being in Ireland though- I'm sure it's the case for many in similar positions- I've been on anti-depressants for over 4 years now with no chance of talking to a psychiatrist due to the HSE rectruitment ban. It makes those ads they have on tv even more infuriating.
    Counsellors and medication cost too much, although I did talk to the campus counsellors when I was a student.
    I feel that I'm basically on my own in trying to tackle this now and I'm coming off the anti-depressants. I go through good and bad spells and I'm focusing of pinpointing the onset of my bad spell and doing things to eradicate it as soon as possible.

    This is why I'm glad that there is the personal issues forum where you can openly discuss your problems and get constructive criticism back. You can also post anonymously if some issues are too private.


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  • #192
    fonecrusher1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,702 ✭✭✭fonecrusher1


    I think excessive alcohol consumption can play a big part in triggering or contributing to someone being depressed.


  • #193
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    opinion guy wrote: »
    Well the family might just surprise you you know. But taking this as you expect - well see that maybe cause your family don't know how to deal with these things ? If you and I were having that conversation I'd ask you more questions or try to get to the root of it some other way. But then I'm used to this kind of stuff. Back when I wasn't used to this stuff I probably would say the same as your folks. So maybe your family aren't the best people to bring it up with ? Especially if there is some tension in the family or anything ??
    Anyone else you're close to ?
    Theres a lot of tension between me and my Dad, we would have a very old fashioned relationship, Im close with my mother, although if I told her, or if I was prescribed something, or went to counselling she would be devastated and blame herself, and treat me completely differently, and I don't want that. Ive often heard her say things like "he must have had a terrible time at home", or "must have had a tragic upbringing" when she hears of people topping themselves. That makes her sound bad, but she is great really. Im sure many people would be just like her.

    No, Im not really close to anyone else. I mean I have friends and all, but feelings and such aren't exactly what we would talk about. I wouldnt imagine many groups of 19 year olds would. Truth be told I would be terrified of breaking down in front of them or anyone even, and humiliating myself.


  • #194
    fryup
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,067 ✭✭✭✭fryup


    wellboy76 wrote: »
    How do you know you have depression?

    well the acid test for me is........how do feel when you first wake up in the morning?

    do you feel refreshed & positive ready for the new day ahead or do you feel wretched not wanting to leave your bedroom and face the world

    depressed people usually feel dreadful during first few hours of the day and if that the way you are.. then you need help, and don't put it on the long finger


  • #195
    greenmachine88
    Closed Accounts Posts: 360 ✭✭greenmachine88


    I've never been depressed and don't think I ever will, I am quite cynical though, but that's mostly by choice


  • #196
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    greenmachine88 wrote: »
    I've never been depressed and don't think I ever will, I am quite cynical though, but that's mostly by choice

    Then this is your own opinion and you are extremely lucky, trust me.


  • #197
    Sardonicat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,408 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Theres a lot of tension between me and my Dad, we would have a very old fashioned relationship, Im close with my mother, although if I told her, or if I was prescribed something, or went to counselling she would be devastated and blame herself, and treat me completely differently, and I don't want that. Ive often heard her say things like "he must have had a terrible time at home", or "must have had a tragic upbringing" when she hears of people topping themselves. That makes her sound bad, but she is great really. Im sure many people would be just like her.

    No, Im not really close to anyone else. I mean I have friends and all, but feelings and such aren't exactly what we would talk about. I wouldnt imagine many groups of 19 year olds would. Truth be told I would be terrified of breaking down in front of them or anyone even, and humiliating myself.

    Your Mam sounds great, actually. I and can guarentee you that she already knows things aren't great with you and probably wants to approach you and doesn't know how. She would be devestated to think that her son was keeping this from her for fear of hurting her. She is you mother and will always want to be the parent to you, not vice-versa.

    You sound like a really decent, caring lad. I so wish you could see how evident that is from your posts and you could cut yourself a little slack.


  • #198
    PrincessLola
    Registered Users Posts: 851 ✭✭✭PrincessLola


    I think you know you have depression when you feel bleak about the future. Apathetic towards everything, even activities you once enjoyed like going out with friends or playing sports. You just want to curl up in a ball and be alone, but of course that response will only make things worse in the long term.

    Its so hard to tell anyone because you feel like you're being a burden on them. Then there are the people who deny there is such a thing as 'depression' because it doesn't fit in with their cosy world view that people can be unhappy over long periods of time, often with no reason.


  • #199
    profitius
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,976 ✭✭✭profitius


    Positive thinking has always worked for me. Depression seems to come from negative thoughts that you can't get rid of although everybody is in control of what they think so thats the good news!

    People also hype up situations in their mind into something they're not. For instance we can look back now about things in our teenage years and laugh but at the time they were a big deal.

    No doubt mental health is more important as physical health but like physical health mental health needs looking after too ie be more aware of negative thoughts.


  • #200
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I have updated the first post on this thread with some useful phone numbers and websites.


  • #201
    Stained Class
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,808 ✭✭✭Stained Class


    stupidusername wrote: »
    ^^^ that attitude is what stops people talking about it.

    how are people so ignorant? I mean if I don't know anything about a condition I don't assume it's not serious or difficult.

    My family wouldn't even get that far :rolleyes: if I said I was feeling low all I'd get is a 'mmmm' from my dad, possibly a question as to whether or not should go to the doctor. that'd be the end of it.

    It's not ignorance. It's fear.

    My earlier post shows my position.

    It's funny, but people who know me ask me about Mental Illness sometimes. It's cos my family has 'form' on that score.

    I don't myself, but paid the price by being tarred with the same brush.

    The damage that does is very hard to describe.

    I spent many years wondering about my own sanity & lost a good portion of my life as a result.

    I have kids now & think they're well & sane, touch wood.

    Anybody think I'd like the idea of one of them gettin married to someone with MI issues?

    That's why the stigma will never go away.

    Sorry, but that's the way I feel about it.


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