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Depression

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  • Registered Users Posts: 26,961 ✭✭✭✭ boneyarsebogman


    have to say the same. it's a hard thing to do to put yourself out there like this especially in a place that is so well known for it's lack of seriousness. hard to imagine this won't bite me in the arse in some way or another.

    Stop it. That way of thinking and posting won't help people who might want to share their stories. It's a fantastic thing that you were all able to.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,671 Wolfe Tone


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    Sorry, Mussolini, we're all demading all sorts of responses from you!

    What I noticed was that your response to bluecat was that you thought depression was something that some people were just predisposed to and no fault of their own and bit of acceptance and understanding was called for but your response to OG was to say in short, that you felt you needed to have a "reason" to be depressed as though you don't deserve understanding (that's my understanding of it, please correct me if I'm wrong). Can you not apply the reasoning of your first post to yourself? You seem to be unjustly harsh towards yourself.
    I suppose, I guess I have been looking for the "silver bullet" so to speak. It would be hard to accept that there isnt much I can do myself to change it, tbh I dont actually know if I have depression or not, or if it is really just something in my life that is making me down, ah I dunno its all a bit scary


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,704 ✭✭✭✭ Princess Peach


    I really don't mind talking about it with online friends, but I'm still a bit cagey about discussing it with my friends from home. I have tried, it was a long time before most of them even knew a thing. They all know about my medication now, only 1 knows about my counselling and I really try not to bring it up much. Can't really explain why, but I am making progress in the talking.

    The only friend I really talk to about it suffers from depression herself, so maybe I think she will just be a lot more understanding. I guess also I don't want my other friends to treat me any differently, or think that I'm looking for sympathy or something. But it gets hard to hide it and I am trying to be more open about it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,475 ✭✭✭✭ Sardonicat


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    I suppose, I guess I have been looking for the "silver bullet" so to speak. It would be hard to accept that there isnt much I can do myself to change it, tbh I dont actually know if I have depression or not, or if it is really just something in my life that is making me down, ah I dunno its all a bit scary
    I hear you.

    Speaking form my own experience only, accepting that I am, for want of a better phrase, predisposed to depression, was a tough thing to do. I also found that while I may not be able to do anything about that predisposition, I am able to deal with it when it lands. I'm not going to go into too much detail as to how I deal with it here as, A) I do not want it to be misconstrued as advice to anyone, and B) what works for me might be disastorous for someone else. But, after a long time, I have learned how to cope with it. But it wasn't until I acknowledged the basic issue (depression) that I was able to do that. Like you, I'm not sure of the causes or reasons for it. I'm not saying that you have depression, I'm in no way qualified to do that. But I can empathise a lot with your posts and I know that you don't deseve to feel like **** all the time. I'll leave that with you.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭ opinion guy


    Hey guys now might be a good point to make you all aware of the Personal Issues forum.

    You can post using your username or anonymously if you wish:

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=127


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  • Registered Users Posts: 447 ✭✭ bluecatmorgana


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    I have no idea, I don't know much about depression and what causes it.

    depression can be caused by your biological makeup which makes it uncontrollable, in other words by making your life better wont necessarily make your depression go away. I think personally that i have depression caused by environmental/circumstancial issues and biological issues. Unfortunately biological depression usually needs medication to deal with it and it doesnt work everytime but it might.


  • Registered Users Posts: 606 ✭✭✭ t0mm13b


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    Sorry, Mussolini, we're all demading all sorts of responses from you!........You seem to be unjustly harsh towards yourself.

    @Sardonicat: I used to constantly be harsh and beat myself up in the head.... procrastinate and get nothing done... this had affected the whole outlook and the experience with depression, it did not help at all retrospectively, in hindsight,
    what could I do.... upbringing is one factor I can definitely pencil in.... "being pushed academically" and to "fail is to let others down" hence the beating up in the head and being self-critical and harsh......


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,903 Star Bingo


    AshSmith wrote: »
    horribly promiscuous

    just wonderin how many more depressed folk as using this as a means to sate their misery? or is it the root cause! seems it may actually be detrimental to one's condition :pac: even a hole is a goal not worth pursuing.. :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,671 Wolfe Tone


    I really don't mind talking about it with online friends, but I'm still a bit cagey about discussing it with my friends from home. I have tried, it was a long time before most of them even knew a thing. They all know about my medication now, only 1 knows about my counselling and I really try not to bring it up much. Can't really explain why, but I am making progress in the talking.

    The only friend I really talk to about it suffers from depression herself, so maybe I think she will just be a lot more understanding. I guess also I don't want my other friends to treat me any differently, or think that I'm looking for sympathy or something. But it gets hard to hide it and I am trying to be more open about it.
    +1


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,671 Wolfe Tone


    Hey guys now might be a good point to make you all aware of the Personal Issues forum.

    You can post using your username or anonymously if you wish:

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=127
    I would point out that that is not the place to go if you are feeling suicidal, as you get trolls there too, and the people arent capable of advising you as they are not trained, you will be instructed to seek professional help.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭ opinion guy


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    I suppose, I guess I have been looking for the "silver bullet" so to speak. It would be hard to accept that there isnt much I can do myself to change it, tbh I dont actually know if I have depression or not, or if it is really just something in my life that is making me down, ah I dunno its all a bit scary

    Change is scary....
    New things are scary....

    ....at first. But then you get used to them, and they are not scary anymore.

    You sound like you've reached the point where you've realised one approach is not working for you and you are realising that, but have not quite decided on what new approach to take ?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,096 Wurly


    Lads, this thread makes for really fantastic reading. Fair play to everyone sharing their stories. It's heartwarming for people to be supporting each other like this. If conversations like this happened more often and on a wider scale, there would be no stigma.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,671 Wolfe Tone


    Change is scary....
    New things are scary....

    ....at first. But then you get used to them, and they are not scary anymore.

    You sound like you've reached the point where you've realised one approach is not working for you and you are realising that, but have not quite decided on what new approach to take ?
    Yeah, Ive ran out of things to blame it on, my new approach will to be keep going and hope it goes away.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,161 Karsini


    I've no real problem with discussing this at all. I'm 26 and have been dealing with depression since I was 15. It's one of those things that you'll know when you experience it; feeling rotten all the time, no desire to do anything, no goals or ambitions. I didn't do particularly well in my leaving cert thanks to it, thought there was no point and didn't do as well as I could have.

    Thankfully I haven't had suicidal thoughts in a while as I have a method of controlling them - I'm very close to my family (well except my sister, she hates me) and it would badly affect them if I were to take my own life. So I plod on from one day to another doing the same thing all the time and locking myself away from the outside world.

    I have tried to seek help in the past but old habits die hard. I've been so independent for so long that trying to be more social is proving very tough. I went to the AH beers in Ron Blacks last year; met some very nice people there but had to literally drag myself out to do it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭ opinion guy


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Yeah, Ive ran out of things to blame it on, my new approach will to be keep going and hope it goes away.

    Well, often times the things at the root of these feelings are the very things we don't want to think about. You think ?


  • Registered Users Posts: 78,133 ✭✭✭✭ Victor


    t0mm13b wrote: »
    AFAIK the mental health act is pretty old and outdated and early 20th century... we're in the 21st century now, ffs....
    No, there is a modern act.

    Mental Health Act, 2001 http://www.irishstatutebook.ie/2001/en/act/pub/0025/index.html


  • Registered Users Posts: 14,772 ✭✭✭✭ Whispered


    Karsini wrote: »
    So I plod on from one day to another doing the same thing all the time and locking myself away from the outside world.
    I do this. I'm not depressed, but I can be antisocial :o. I dread groups of people, I feel like I'm not as funny, pretty, interesting as everyone else, it's an effort to speak to people and I sometimes struggle with conversation. I also get annoyed at people so easily. If I've had a few drinks I come out of my shell a little bit, then wake up the next day and have often cried about conversations where I "looked silly" or I "bored everyone" or "accidently insulted someone". If I overheard these conversations between 2 people I wouldn't think twice about it, but I cringe when I have them. It would be easier to go lock myself away and if I was left to it I probably would. Thankfully my lovely husband insists on going out all the time and bringing me with him. Must go thank him.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,809 ✭✭✭ Stained Class


    Great thread guys.

    Some of the posts are a bit hard to read.

    Mental illness is one of the big taboo subjects alright.

    Never had any trouble that way myself, thankfully.

    Nonetheless, it's a subject that's dominated my life growing up.

    One of my parents has major mental health issues.

    This caused us no end of grief & affected myself & the rest of the family profoundly & permanently.

    Adding insult to injury, was the expectation that I myself was expected by some people to end up the same way.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭ ilovesleep


    I dont know.

    Im so afraid and fearful right now as to whats happening in Ireland. I feel awful and rotten. Tired and exhausted. Breaking out in tears everyday. All I want to do is sleep forever.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,903 Star Bingo


    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then? cos the definitions are conflicting. the 'reality' man insists on shaping can 'depress' us all; particularly in our current climate when it all goes t!ts up.. may well be better locking yourself away tbh - but is it really a chemical imbalance which only prescribed medication can aid? because those things depressed me even more.. n trust me i was depressed! ? otherwise melancholy thanks.. or a sort of.. sober sombriety. out of choice - but who do you listen to on such matters? who do you choose to ignore. when it stems from the self; has it to do with the self? sure there's contributary outside factors but.. the solution lies within yourself.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,096 Wurly


    Star Bingo wrote: »
    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then? cos the definitions are conflicting. the 'reality' man insists on shaping can 'depress' us all; particularly in our current climate when it all goes t!ts up.. may well be better locking yourself away tbh - but is it really a chemical imbalance which only prescribed medication can aid? because those things depressed me even more.. n trust me i was depressed! ? otherwise melancholy thanks.. or a sort of.. sober sombriety. out of choice - but who do you listen to on such matters? who do you choose to ignore. when it stems from the self; has it to do with the self? the solution lies within yourself.

    I cant give you a definitive definition of 'depression' but I can give you a definition of 'depressing' - your blatant ignorance as shown on this thread.


  • Registered Users Posts: 26,961 ✭✭✭✭ boneyarsebogman


    Depression means many things to many people and can manifest itself in many different ways.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 12,333 ✭✭✭✭ JONJO THE MISER


    I wouldn't say i suffer from depression but being a gambler and online poker player i have suffered greatly from short term depression so i can imagine what it must be like to constantly have it.
    My worst was a 1 year and 1/2 ago when i lost the guts of €6500 in less than 24 hours, i was in a black hole for 2 weeks after that.


  • Registered Users Posts: 78,133 ✭✭✭✭ Victor


    Star Bingo wrote: »
    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then?
    Depression is different to the like of an infection where we can point to one single things and say "Yes, that's it". They aren't certain on what exactly causes it (if they did they could fix it "just like that").

    Its for the patient and doctor to come up with a diagnosis - you can't self diagnose.

    I don't think there is one fixed definition.

    www.vhi.ie/pdf/employers/dep/HowtodealwithGrief.pdf
    Symptoms of depression include:
    • A sad, anxious, or "empty" mood that won't go away
    • Loss of interest in what you used to enjoy
    • Low energy, fatigue, feeling "slowed down"
    • Changes in sleep patterns
    • Loss of appetite, weight loss, or weight gain
    • Trouble concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
    • Feeling hopeless or gloomy
    • Feeling guilty, worthless, or helpless
    • Recurring aches and pains that don't respond to treatment

    http://ie.reachout.com/find/articles/depression?gclid=CM_br9WQkKYCFY4f4QodKBljaQ
    When someone is depressed they may feel a range of things including:

    * feeling hopeless or helpless
    * losing interest in activities they usually enjoy
    * a lack of energy
    * changes in sleeping and eating patterns
    * crying a lot or feeling agitated
    * high use of alcohol or other drugs
    * losing their temper
    * withdrawing from the group
    * headaches or stomach aches
    * feeling empty
    * feeling anxious.

    You need to have at least 5 of those symptoms on and on-going basis over several weeks.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,671 Wolfe Tone


    Hmm, I would have all of them except for the drugs one and the drink one


  • Registered Users Posts: 26,961 ✭✭✭✭ boneyarsebogman


    The one thing I find odd about those two lists is that it does not mention suicidal thoughts, which I would have assumed to be a big factor with depression.

    Unfortunately I have had all of them, bar the drink and drugs.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,087 ✭✭✭✭ Oranage2


    Star Bingo wrote: »
    so who'd like to take a stab at defining depression then?

    Well before this thread I thought depression was a thing people got from being stuck in a ruth that didn't have motivation to do anything a vicious circle, after reading this thread I don't really know what depression is? I still amazed people with jobs, boy/girl friends, people with college etc... can suffer, so this thread has made me less ignorant and more aware.

    Dont really know what to say so good luck y'all and hope good things happen


  • Registered Users Posts: 26,961 ✭✭✭✭ boneyarsebogman


    Oranage2 wrote: »
    Well before this thread I thought depression was a thing people got from being stuck in a ruth that didn't have motivation to do anything a vicious circle, after reading this thread I don't really know what depression is? I still amazed people with jobs, boy/girl friends, people with college etc... can suffer, so this thread has made me less ignorant and more aware.

    Dont really know what to say so good luck y'all and hope good things happen

    Then this thread has worked :)

    I genuinely hope others have also been made more aware, especially about their own possible depression and that they will go and get help.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭ opinion guy


    Trí wrote: »
    I cant give you a definitive definition of 'depression' but I can give you a definition of 'depressing' - your blatant ignorance as shown on this thread.

    Eh... I for one am not convinced that Star Bingo is trolling. I think he/she may well be genuine.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 24,961 ✭✭✭✭ Lilly Shaggy Superhuman


    I have to say, genuinely this IMO is probably one of the best threads ever in After Hours.

    I honestly can not think of any which can top it, 'bravo' OP.

    Well done, you've to be commended for this one.


This discussion has been closed.
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