Silly stuff your parents said

G_R · 26-08-2009 02:37PM

my da still uses pounds and pence....

how long have we had euros now??

Ruu_Old · 26-08-2009 02:41PM

Novella wrote: »

"Daddy, can we go to the shop for sweets?"

"No."

"Why?"

"That's the why!"

What does that even mean?!

Hah, that must be an Irish parents thing. Big emphasis on the, so true.

Novella · 26-08-2009 02:47PM

Ruu wrote: »

Hah, that must be an Irish parents thing. Big emphasis on the, so true.

Haha, my dad still says it to me now and I still don't get it!!

The_Conductor · 26-08-2009 02:48PM

I didn't witness this- but had it related to me. When our parents first got married and moved to Dublin- my mother decided that as the long evenings were drawing in that she'd set a fire. She walked down to the village and enquired in the turf accountant- whether they did home deliveries......

Shes also strangely technologically literate- and loves sending text messages. Unfortunately- she insists on using predictive text, but has a habit of continuing to type the word after accepting the suggestion (regardless of whether its right or wrong)- coming up with some weird truncated and bizzarely long combinations that have you scratching your head. Occasionally these might involve urgent questions that require a response- normally it takes 2 or 3 people to sit down to decrypt the txt......

When we were little there was some sort of health promotion thing doing the rounds trying to encourage people to eat more onions. We ended up with onions being added to virtually everything possible (shudder!) We were told that onions were rich in iodine- and if we didn't eat our onions we'd never be allowed in an aeroplane. To this day I have no idea what the link with iodine and flying is......

Anytime the parents wanted to discuss something in front of us, without alerting us to what they were discussing- they'd switch to Irish. As our language skills improved- the switch to French was made, and when I and a sibling entered secondary school- they changed to Spanish. I had a great laugh when my youngest sister was about to enter secondary school, and my mum asked me to look into getting her and dad German linguaphone......

(It stood to us- almost the entire family are reasonably fluent in 4 or 5 languages- Portuguese being the most recent addition to our collective repertoire (though it would have been helpful if one of us had copped that there was a difference between Brazillian Portuguese, and regular Portuguese......))

allandanyways · 26-08-2009 03:06PM

Acacia wrote: »

Also, when he first ''got the hang of this internet yoke" instead of typing a search word into Google, he'd type the actual question as a web address, say, "www.howdoyoufixawashingmachine?.com"

My dad still does that asking google questions thingy. Before he got his own laptop, the google history used to be priceless... "What is the quickest way to Limerick from Kildare?" and then google would return a map or whatever... Dad says "But I don't want to go that way. Can you suggest another route?" and it would steadily get more insistent, resulting in "Who do I write an email to if I want to complain about google?"

Mam doesn't like all these new fancy foods either... She calls hummus "hyoomus" and sushi "suh-shiii", she asked me in a suspicious voice if green tea was made from grass- "y'know that type what the drug dealers do be using?" and don't even get her started on indian foods...

mental07 · 26-08-2009 07:15PM

"Just shut your mouth and eat your dinner."

shenanigans1982 · 26-08-2009 07:21PM

Acacia wrote: »

Oh another thing, when I was little my mam would always say "Don't come crying to me when a car runs you over and you're dead." Or some variant of it. Made absolutely no sense.

Don't come running and crying to me if you fall off that wall and break your legs.

karlog · 26-08-2009 07:25PM

Eat that now, their's people in Africa who would die for your dinner...............

Mr Fonnen · 26-08-2009 07:27PM

"That Lawn needs cleaning"

Wompa1 · 26-08-2009 08:13PM

When my brother and I were 5 my mother asked my dad Where the kids were..He said Aren't they here...

He brought us to the chipper with him and left us in the car when he met a friend and went drinking instead...he managed to eat, drink, walk home and pass out. My mother tells us we were in the car for nearly 9 hours...excellent parenting!

sam34 · 26-08-2009 08:14PM

when i was a young wan, i asked my mother what condoms were (i genuinely didnt know, i was very naive, bless me!)

she said something along the lines of "they're something a daddy wears when he and a mammy are trying to make a baby, so that the baby cant be made"

wtf

clear as mud :rolleyes:

tiernanobrien · 26-08-2009 08:21PM

When my dad got the internet he tried sending it by just putting the name 'Allen Byrne' in the address box. Then he started getting really pissed off after it wouldn't send and called me in... I fell about the place

Anna Molly · 26-08-2009 09:31PM

Whenever me or my brothers would make faces the parents would say,
"if the wind changes, your face will stay like that."

kudos to them, it stopped us making faces.:pac:

Bonavox · 26-08-2009 09:37PM

Nothing really! They are out of touch, but just for basic reasons! My mam asked me how does she turn on her new laptop. I replied: "See that big round button on it's own with the power symbol on it?"

rainbowtrout · 26-08-2009 09:52PM

A couple of years ago I had a blue and white striped top that my mother washed and obviously ruined in the washing machine (a fairly regularly occurrance). Instead of just saying she put it in with dark clothes and it ended up a murky grey colour, she went out and bought another one except she probably couldn't get one in blue and white, so she got one in grey and white, ironed it and put it with the rest of the ironed and folded clothes. When I found it and knew she had replaced another ruined top I played dumb and I asked her what happened my top. She replied ' It ran in the wash and the blue ran out of the stripes and those stripes turned grey'. So I said how did they white stripes stay white? And she said 'They just did' And she expected me to believe it!

MJOR · 26-08-2009 09:52PM

My Dad was convinced that the corrs song Give me a reason was called Jerry O Regan(his name)

My mom used to say "sh!t is my thanks" &I'll brain you & I break your face

almostnever · 26-08-2009 09:52PM

My brother was watching some motorsport,can't remember exactly what it was,but anyway. A red and white car came on and he asked my mam "who would you say used to sponsor them?" (the answer was Marlboro) and my mam replied,dead serious, "Simon Cowell?" :pac: then she didn't understand why he got mad. Oh,she's hilarious sometimes,really.

Oh,and today we were at the hospital in Belfast,and walking around the car park. She said,in this really reflective tone, "Ah,this hospital must have seen it's fair share of bomb victims and bullet people." Bullet people? WTF? I think she meant people who were shot.

Edit: And if I ask her why,she always says "that's why." It makes no sense!

Four-Percent · 26-08-2009 09:58PM

almostnever wrote: »

My brother was watching some motorsport,can't remember exactly what it was,but anyway. A red and white car came on and he asked my mam "who would you say used to sponsor them?" (the answer was Marlboro) and my mam replied,dead serious, "Simon Cowell?" :pac: then she didn't understand why he got mad. Oh,she's hilarious sometimes,really.

:pac: Classic

almostnever · 26-08-2009 10:05PM

^ Apparently,she thought she had to think of someone who had money,and then decided to factor in being on TV lately,which is how she came to Simon Cowell,and she still doesn't get what my brother meant :pac:

bartley160 · 26-08-2009 10:10PM

my granny was sick in hospital a few years back.(she was gone a bit senial) myself and my sister were visiting and she said to us she wanted to get up and go to the toilet. no matter how much we told her she couldnt get up she wouldnt listen, so my sister went and got the nurse. when she came back my grannyhad her back to her and the nurse gently tapped her on the shoulder and asked 'whats wrong with you molly'? my granny replied serious as you like ''i have that mad cow disease, dont i''. the whole ward cracked up. unfortunatly she died next day.

g-whizz · 26-08-2009 11:16PM

"if you don't stop messing, i'll put the two sides of your jaw together with a slap!"

oh mother...

kinetic · 26-08-2009 11:46PM

Hailey Attractive Therapy wrote: »

My dad is very intelligent but quite inarticulate, plus he has a Donegal accent, he once left a voicemail on the home phone enquiring about dinner

"are we having the tikki chickii..the chicken tikken...chicken little...*sigh* tikken chicken...ah **** it *hangs up*"

I read this last night and still laughed a couple of times today trying to picture the call.

Scrambled egg · 26-08-2009 11:49PM

"Its always winter for willies." That was humiliating

Edgedinblue · 26-08-2009 11:50PM

^ same as. laughed today cause we got a dominos takeaway menu in the door, they're doing tikkii chickii pizza now :P

lynchpin · 26-08-2009 11:56PM

I brought home a packet of pistachio nuts years ago.

A few days later I asked my mum if she liked them. Her reply:

"No...They were too hard for my liking!!!"

The poor woman ate a few with the shells still on...

Back when the playstation first came out(I was around 13) I jokingly asked my dad to buy one for me.
On Christmas eve he waltzes in and says "Son...your Playboy is out in the car!!!!"

There was neither a playboy or a playstation in the car

Worst Christmas ever

deanodrummer · 27-08-2009 01:34AM

Not me parents but me Grandad one day rang me Ma and left a message on the answering machine. Started with..
''Hello, is this Mary? This is your father. If this isn't Mary, then I'm not your father.'' Cheers for clearing that up Grandad.

christina_x · 27-08-2009 01:48AM

deanodrummer wrote: »

Not me parents but me Grandad one day rang me Ma and left a message on the answering machine. Started with..
''Hello, is this Mary? This is your father. If this isn't Mary, then I'm not your father.'' Cheers for clearing that up Grandad.

made me crack up:D

Big Ears · 27-08-2009 05:46AM

lynchpin wrote: »

Back when the playstation first came out(I was around 13) I jokingly asked my dad to buy one for me.
On Christmas eve he waltzes in and says "Son...your Playboy is out in the car!!!!"

There was neither a playboy or a playstation in the car

In fairness that priest was a bit of a playboy............your father always was cruel.

The_Conductor · 27-08-2009 06:40AM

almostnever wrote: »

^ Apparently,she thought she had to think of someone who had money,and then decided to factor in being on TV lately,which is how she came to Simon Cowell,and she still doesn't get what my brother meant :pac:

He does own over 40 cars- and is a total enthusiast- so perhaps shes been watching Topgear on the sly?

Wooder79 · 27-08-2009 07:52AM

I was at a seminar (5 day booze up) for a few days in Brussels recently with college. There were 41 of us on the trip and nobody knew anybody. The day before I was due to go home, I was on the phone to my mam. The conversation went like this:
Mam: " So. Did you get off with anyone?"
Me: "I'm sorry what?!?"
Mam: "You know. Did you make any friends?......(not happy now)what are you laughing at?!"
Me: "Mam, that's not what that mean's love...that mean's what you'd call knowing someone in the biblical sense."

Poor sweet innocent mammy...

Silly stuff your parents said

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