Ashling Murphy RIP - a discussion *please read the OP before posting*

It's a senseless murder and may she rest in peace. I too dont understand this demonisation of men, most men I know myself included are deeply respectful towards women, mothers ,sisters etc..more respectful than we would be towards other males. Though I do think this is going to spectacularly backfire on our media and political class in the next few days, they'll have a new fight on their hands.

Not sure who you are responding to but I’ll bite as I have moaned twice that the Taoiseach has said this.

It isn’t all men though is it! That’s the problem!

I’ve read some of the tweets on the #sheeasonlygoingforarun and there’s some quite nasty, false and at times dangerous tweets, one for example stating all men benefit from violent men by keeping women down and scared.

This rhetoric detracts from what will turn out to be the actual facts and does infinitely more damage than it does help!

Likewise I have daughters of similar age and a wife etc and similar concerns. But I don't think that it's our place to stop banter and flirting between the sexes. It's part of our human existence. Difficulties arise on the borderlines between what is acceptable and otherwise and even that varies by individual. But why this topic is being tied in with this appalling murder is beyond me. Opposite ends completely of the scale. This was thankfully a fairly rare event. And before someone makes up a list, think of the tens of thousands of people, many women who walk, jog, run, swim, cycle every day without being murdered.

Streetlight there was a woman murdered on christmas eve, where was the outrage then.

Seeing plenty of men need to be educated that it's not acceptable behavour, teenage boys need to go to classes.

Do these men and teenagers not have parents or a parent to teach them from the cradle how to treat another human being. This sh*t can be curtailed if they are told how to behave at home. It's not just males, females can be just as bad with wolf whistles and making the opposite sex feel uncomfortable and when they get talking about guys it goes into the gutter just as quickly as if it a gang of lads. Parents have a responsibility to raise their children with morals, they need to stop expecting everyone else to teach or control their children.

Everyone no mater what gender needs to be able to feel safe when out, need to feel safe in a relationship, should not live looking over our shoulders all the time.

That's just hiding behind stats that means very little, every girl/woman has a story of some man or men that try it on with them, or make unwanted sexual advances towards them. While every guy most likely wishes every girl/woman would try it on with them or make suggestive sexual advances towards them.

but the problem is the vicious people you talk about are overwhelmingly male! By calling them people, you’re removing a very common trend between them. Society must ask itself why are most of its violent people male?

I haven’t seen anyone wolf whistling at a woman since I was a kid (the 1980s) and thought it had died out in this country but could be wrong. However I was in Spain a couple of years ago with a group of teenagers and was shocked at the level of sexual aggression the girls received. Grown men on building sites would turn off machinery so they could be heard when they roared at the girls. In many cases the hand signals made it clear what they wanted to do to the girls. Men would stop and in some cases U turn cars to follow and comment to the girls. The girls were between 14 and 16 years old. As a father I have to say it was vile to see. You can’t say this sort of behaviour is harmless.

For me respect for and between both sexes is key and can be taught to young kids and kids can learn this by observing adults and parents. However you will never remove violence from the world through education. There will always be violence. Part of the response has to be a deterrent in the form of proper punishment for violence. It’s a joke in this country. There was a case last week where a man defiled his young cousin and got 30 months in prison - he already had 140 convictions. It won’t fix all issues but it will help.

Also can we stop trying to link violence to mental health. Yes it’s an issue in some cases, but some people are just fcuking bad and nothing will stop them being violent.

The usual suspects turning this into men v women issue is also not helping IMO. Where were these people when Urantsetseg Tserendorj was murdered in Dublin?

RIP to Ashling and condolences to her family.

Yes you are defending it.

In the opening thread, the discussions is about can be done to help women feel safe.

Let them go about their business in peace for a start. They don't want or need your male banter. While I cant speak for all women, its safe to say that given the feedback on social media, that the majority of women do not want to be harassed when out for a run, walk or coffee.

You seem unable to grasp that this is intimidation.

Women should not have to put up with "the small stuff here that males do from time to time".

Not all "males". And the "males" that do it, need to stop it. It's far from ok.

Your posts are totally tone deaf given the conversation on the table here.

But it 100% demonstrate what the problem is.

Your previous posts have continually stated that’s why ‘men must do better’

You are being purposefully antagonistic so don’t be surprised when you get called on it!

I very much can see the difference, if your bothered to read my previous posts that much is completely obvious.

Stop generalising that ‘men must do better’ it’s generalistic nonsense!

You can blame evolution for that. The same reason most people who go to war are male, join the police force, fire brigade, paramedics etc.