Ruining a wedding

mfceiling · 16-04-2021 2:11pm

stuboy01 wrote: »

Here's what generally happens...
'ah look, there's jimmy...he's dead now. Oh and there's jennifer, she's dead now. oh and ...etc.'

Everyone's is either dead or either 'looked great then' meaning 'looks dreadful now'

on a lighter note, I will be looking at my sisters wedding video soon with extended family. filmed by her uncle who, like someone else stated here, was the only person with a video camera back in the 80s. we only found the vhs tape with her name and 'wedding' written on it. so it could be Rambo for all we know, which will be awkward when we all sit down for the reveal. TBH that's actually half the excitement, it could be just 80s recordings off the telly!

Even worse...could be a "home" movie.

chooseusername · 16-04-2021 2:13pm

A fairly raucous table of 20 somethings cousins had a chunky sweepstake on the length of the speeches.
The Champagne had done it's job and as the father of the bride was about to sit down after his speech
one of the girls stood up and started shouting;
" keep going, keep going, another couple of minutes"
The old lad paused for a second or two, then still standing says " once upon a time , maybe but .......sorry" and sat down.
The Reverend Father was the first to laugh.

stuboy01 · 16-04-2021 2:14pm

mfceiling wrote: »

Even worse...could be a "home" movie.

We all feel that this is the most likely outcome, 5 minutes of the wedding and then the Uncles home videos. Considering we haven't seen the uncle in question, ooh, probably since the wedding (he may be dead like everyone else in those old wedding videos for all I know), we'll be able to turn them off. Thank God.

ontour2 · 16-04-2021 2:28pm

Wedding in a far flung land. Group of Irish were over working in the local office. One of the girls in the office kindly invited us to her wedding.
As an aside, one of the lads decided that he did not have appropriate wedding attire and decided to get a suit made in a place near the hotel that had a massive sign on the roof for 'Bespook Custom Suit'. It was a 'fitted suit' with 'invisible stitching'. Not sure who or what it was made to fit but it certainly wasn't this guy. They were right about the invisible stitching, most of it was missing. It was €12 for the suit and he was robbed. It progressively fell apart over the course of the day. In fairness by the evening we were pulling the threads on the suit as he insisted on defending his purchase.

Back to the Wedding, the bride's father was a Naval Commander and the wedding was in a naval base, a huge affair. At the wedding we were introduced to the local chief of police. It transpired that his son was studying in Ireland and he had not been here yet. Roll on a bottle of vintage whiskey in the officers bar chatting with the local good and great. Felt like we were living the life of an Ambassador. It had the makings of a cracking day.

Loads of commotion outside but that is sort of par for the course at these weddings so not a surprise. A couple of guys come running in and have a heated conversation with the chief of police and suddenly we are told we have to leave and are being pushed out the door. This was going downhill rapidly. We get pushed into the back of a jeep, not the seats, the boot. We are told to keep our heads down. We can see a group of military police surrounded by wedding guests in what was basically a huge shouting match. Jeep departs at speed, bouncing over speed ramps and does not stop at the security barrier. We hear what sounds like gun shots as the jeep rounds the security barrier. Fortunately we are back in the hotel in 15 minutes and roll out of the back of the jeep with no clue as to what has just happened.

What had transpired is that some British reporters had blagged their way on the base few weeks earlier and written some offensive expose news articles that were a major embarrassment to the navy. The Military Police were blamed for letting them in. We had been spotted by the Military Police at the wedding and they had put two and two together and determined that we were more British spies and that they needed to arrest us immediately. The Wedding guests and the Chief of Police were having none of it and decided that they were going to get us out of there.

There was a lot of drinking to calm the nerves when we got back to the hotel as it was about an hour later when one of the local guys from the office pitched up to explain the situation and check we were OK. We felt really bad about the hassle we had caused for the bride. They were really embarrassed as they thought they had offended or insulted us. We just kept telling them that it was the best wedding story we were likely to ever have and that we had a great time.

Been a fun week recalling some of the 900 weddings I have worked at and the 20 I have attended. It's a numbers game, there was bound to be some stories! Thanks Cena!

HildaOgdenx · 16-04-2021 2:38pm

Neyite wrote: »

Uncle hooked his camera up to the telly to give the bride to give her an early preview of her wedding, promptly fúcked off into the garden for a smoke. For some reason it started playing at the Communion bit, whereupon you could hear another Aunt bitchily critiquing all the other female guests and their outfits queueing up. Really insulting stuff. It was especially excruciating because most of her victims were right there in the room listening to her on the video. She went on and on... and so did the video camera because nobody knew how to turn it this fancy new machinery except the Uncle. He came back in to a stony silence and a puce red aunt sitting on the sofa getting Glares of Death.

She's not accepted an invite to any family wedding since.

Laughing my head off, but OMG!

dinneenp · 16-04-2021 2:49pm

chooseusername wrote: »

The old lad paused for a second or two, then still standing says " once upon a time , maybe but .......sorry" and sat down.

....I don't get it. Was it meant to mean something or just throwing in a few words?

Le Bruise · 16-04-2021 2:52pm

dinneenp wrote: »

....I don't get it. Was it meant to mean something or just throwing in a few words?

Assume he was referring to his dwindling prowess in the bedroom.

BaZmO* · 16-04-2021 3:25pm

dinneenp wrote: »

....I don't get it. Was it meant to mean something or just throwing in a few words?

He was going to continue with the speech so she could win her bet. But then just said, nah!

partyguinness · 16-04-2021 3:58pm

stuboy01 wrote: »

on a lighter note, I will be looking at my sisters wedding video soon with extended family. filmed by her uncle who, like someone else stated here, was the only person with a video camera back in the 80s. we only found the vhs tape with her name and 'wedding' written on it. so it could be Rambo for all we know, which will be awkward when we all sit down for the reveal. TBH that's actually half the excitement, it could be just 80s recordings off the telly!

If it is anything like our house...it will start off with the wedding and after 20 seconds it will cut to recordings of Eamon Dunphy and Johnny Giles from Italia 90.

IAgreeTo · 16-04-2021 4:12pm

Long time lurker, first time poster.
What about couples ruining their own wedding?
A relative of mine got married in a remote part of a European country. Both Irish.
So we arrived at the airport and spent 4 hours on a bus to this place. Apparently his wife loved it on a cycling trip when she was a kid or some bull like that.
Anyway, we stopped in McDonalds on the way as everybody was starving and the bus driver didn't know anywhere better to stop.
Got to the town, they had a nice arrival reception.
Next day, wedding. Another hour on the bus to the chapel, then another 45 minutes (on horrific rural roads not fit for such a bus) to the reception.
The food was absolutely dreadful. Awful, awful, awful. People were starving later in the night.
Then, back on the bus and another hour back to the town we were staying in.
There was more "fun and frolics" the next day - those who went home were the envy of those who were staying around. People genuinely couldn't wait to get out of this place.
And needless to say, it was 4 more hours back to the airport.

It was without doubt the most blatant attempt I have ever witnessed from a wedding couple of self-indulgence and giving people nothing to do for 2-3 days only indulge the 2 of them. It is still regularly talked about at family gatherings (not with the bride/groom) as the worst wedding everybody was ever at. One cousin knows some others who were there and I believe the feeling is unanimous according to him.

Whether or not the couple themselves have any idea just how badly the whole thing bombed, we will never know. It was an absolutely awful weekend, fuelled by a bridezilla and groomzilla who couldn't contemplate that people might not want to spend the whole weekend indulging them.

glenfieldman · 16-04-2021 4:15pm

Speaking of videographers.
I was best man for my mate, and during the day I noticed that the photographer and videographer were missing most of the important bits of the wedding, kiss, candles, rings etc.
By the way I am a wedding photographer, so I know the moments to capture

Anyway cut to the meal, the top table was decorated with flowers and wedding ****e.
Before the meal was served I was giving out to the grooms men about how crap and unprofessional the two guys capturing the day were
After about 10 minutes of me ranting the video guy came up to our table and pointed out the mic that was hidden in the flowers to record the speeches, the two guys heard everything

castletownman · 16-04-2021 4:30pm

On the subject of watching wedding videos, my friend whose wedding I mentioned last night, went through a spell with his new wife of being forced to sit down and watch it every Saturday night. For the first couple of months of the marriage.

He wasn't allowed to log on to play FIFA with his friends back home in Ireland for even an hour of a Saturday- nope she had to re-watch the cursed thing AGAIN.

The J Stands for Jay · 16-04-2021 4:35pm

stuboy01 wrote: »

Here's what generally happens...
'ah look, there's jimmy...he's dead now. Oh and there's jennifer, she's dead now. oh and ...etc.'

Everyone's is either dead or either 'looked great then' meaning 'looks dreadful now'

on a lighter note, I will be looking at my sisters wedding video soon with extended family. filmed by her uncle who, like someone else stated here, was the only person with a video camera back in the 80s. we only found the vhs tape with her name and 'wedding' written on it. so it could be Rambo for all we know, which will be awkward when we all sit down for the reveal. TBH that's actually half the excitement, it could be just 80s recordings off the telly!

Just be careful of the word written after 'wedding'. Is it 'day' or 'night'?

PhilOssophy · 16-04-2021 4:45pm

IAgreeTo wrote: »

Long time lurker, first time poster.
What about couples ruining their own wedding?
A relative of mine got married in a remote part of a European country. Both Irish.
So we arrived at the airport and spent 4 hours on a bus to this place. Apparently his wife loved it on a cycling trip when she was a kid or some bull like that.
Anyway, we stopped in McDonalds on the way as everybody was starving and the bus driver didn't know anywhere better to stop.
Got to the town, they had a nice arrival reception.
Next day, wedding. Another hour on the bus to the chapel, then another 45 minutes (on horrific rural roads not fit for such a bus) to the reception.
The food was absolutely dreadful. Awful, awful, awful. People were starving later in the night.
Then, back on the bus and another hour back to the town we were staying in.
There was more "fun and frolics" the next day - those who went home were the envy of those who were staying around. People genuinely couldn't wait to get out of this place.
And needless to say, it was 4 more hours back to the airport.

It was without doubt the most blatant attempt I have ever witnessed from a wedding couple of self-indulgence and giving people nothing to do for 2-3 days only indulge the 2 of them. It is still regularly talked about at family gatherings (not with the bride/groom) as the worst wedding everybody was ever at. One cousin knows some others who were there and I believe the feeling is unanimous according to him.

Whether or not the couple themselves have any idea just how badly the whole thing bombed, we will never know. It was an absolutely awful weekend, fuelled by a bridezilla and groomzilla who couldn't contemplate that people might not want to spend the whole weekend indulging them.

Rule #1 of weddings - never rely on anybody else to get you to/from it.
Get your own way there, you can decide when you leave then. If the food is crap, you can go off and get more.
Funny - the food is one thing I've never complained about at an Irish wedding. I've had a couple of iffy ones overseas.
(P.S. Sounds horrific!)

amber69 · 16-04-2021 5:14pm

Wife's friend is Polish her husband Irish. Married in Poland, as previously mentioned about the vodka the custom was for the groom to go to every table in the room and have a drink with them, his wife pleaded with him not to do it and it wouldn't be expected as he wasn't a local. It was a large wedding and he spent his wedding night getting his stomach pumped out in hospital.

chooseusername · 16-04-2021 5:16pm

" keep going, keep going, another couple of minutes"

dinneenp wrote: »

....I don't get it. Was it meant to mean something or just throwing in a few words?

BaZmO* wrote: »

He was going to continue with the speech so she could win her bet. But then just said, nah!

He should have said "I'll have what she's having"
I'll get the Reverend to explain it to you two.

monkeysnapper · 16-04-2021 9:51pm

Sebastian Dangerfield wrote: »

I have left out a lot of detail due to an irrational fear that someone in attendance will read it, and easily identify it. It was pretty unique!

To late..... I printed all that post off and sold it to a Hollywood director .....

Sebastian Dangerfield · 17-04-2021 7:09am

PhilOssophy wrote: »

Funny - the food is one thing I've never complained about at an Irish wedding. I've had a couple of iffy ones overseas.
(P.S. Sounds horrific!)

I was at a Romanian wedding once. 7 courses of largely cabbage based food. T'was a gassy second day

cee_jay · 17-04-2021 10:04am

This is the story of a wedding I was accused of ruining

I am not friends with this couple anymore as I couldn't deal with their drama any longer.

An ex-friend was the epitome of bridezilla. Her and her fiance had an excel spreadsheet on the run up to the wedding to calculate how much profit they were set to make from their gifts. Her friends were asked to pass the word around to people who were invited that it should be money only gifts, and I was told the minimum amount they were expecting from me.
A new shop opened in our local shopping centre a few months before their wedding, and I just said in passing they had some lovely items, some which could make a lovely gift for a newly married couple (not thinking of their wedding). She jumped down my throat saying they were expecting x money from me, and all other guests because otherwise it wouldn't be worth their while getting married.

I wasn't a bridesmaid, but had been asked to say a reflection after communion. She instructed me, and other friends who were saying readings or prayers of the faithful that we should wear outfits in a certain colour to fit with her colour scheme for the wedding. However, the morning of the wedding, I went to put on my pink dress which I had worn to a different wedding a month previous to realize the zip had been broken by the dry cleaners. I was getting ready at my parents as I lived in a different county at the time, and had my mam and aunt out with sewing kits and my dad with WD40 to get the zip moving, but the zip would not budge. Panic stations, the only other dress I had at my parents was a white, black and green beach summer dress I had bought for a holiday in Spain, but I had to wear it. My other aunt was going to the wedding, and she had to drop me shoes and bag etc to match this dress.

All this drama meant it was getting later and later and l was going to be late for the church. I had the mass booklets which I had made for them free of charge and was supposed to be at the church early to give them out. So I got my dad to drive to the church and give them to someone, while I was in panic mode. Got there on time in the end and did the reflection.

Before the dinner at the reception, the bride pulled me aside to say I had ruined her pictures due to the colour of my dress, and how bad it looked that her younger brother had to go row by row to give people the mass booklets. She said she hoped I was proud that I ruined her day. I didn't say a word to her that day, but she also got the groomsman to remove my name from the thank you speeches.

Akrasia · 17-04-2021 10:11am

cee_jay wrote: »

This is the story of a wedding I was accused of ruining I am not friends with this couple anymore as I couldn't deal with their drama any longer........

So, when are that couple getting divorced? Nobody could stay married to such a petty self important and vindictive person

cee_jay · 17-04-2021 10:16am

Akrasia wrote: »

So, when are that couple getting divorced? Nobody could stay married to such a petty self important and vindictive person

Her husband is as bad - he was the one who setup the spreadsheet, and gave her the "figures" as to how much they expected from each guest. Match made in heaven.

17-04-2021 10:27am

It beggars belief that there’s actually people like that in the world. Definitely better not knowing them.

BaZmO* · 17-04-2021 10:34am

If someone told me how much money they were expecting from me for their wedding gift I’d be telling them I’m not going to their wedding. End of.

I’d like to think that I’ve always been pretty generous with my wedding gifts but for someone to put an expected number on it!!! Nah, I’m not attending a gig!

cee_jay · 17-04-2021 10:39am

Looking back, I put up with so much from that friendship. I tried raising the expected gift issue with one or two of our mutual friends (one a bridesmaid), but I was made think I was the unreasonable one for finding it a problem.
We had been friends for years, and there was a whole group, but the relationship between everyone was toxic. I know now they were bullies, and it took this, and a couple of other issues with one or two more, before I realised I was better without them in my life.

odyssey06 · 17-04-2021 10:39am

Some weddings deserve to be ruined...
People arent pawns and little things go awry.

Reasonable people of course wouldnt think a wedding ruined for such a trivial thing.

Ash.J.Williams · 17-04-2021 10:41am

cee_jay wrote: »

Looking back, I put up with so much from that friendship. I tried raising the expected gift issue with one or two of our mutual friends (one a bridesmaid), but I was made think I was the unreasonable one for finding it a problem.
We had been friends for years, and there was a whole group, but the relationship between everyone was toxic. I know now they were bullies, and it took this, and a couple of other issues with one or two more, before I realised I was better without them in my life.

Your story tells me all I need to know , so taking that on board , what was the actual wedding like ? Any craic?

17-04-2021 10:41am

cee_jay wrote: »

Before the dinner at the reception, the bride pulled me aside to say I had ruined her pictures due to the colour of my dress, and how bad it looked that her younger brother had to go row by row to give people the mass booklets. She said she hoped I was proud that I ruined her day. I didn't say a word to her that day, but she also got the groomsman to remove my name from the thank you speeches.

FFS. This is not some 18 year old birthday bash. Even an 18 yo male or female would have more decency!

cee_jay · 17-04-2021 10:46am

Ash.J.Williams wrote: »

Your story tells me all I need to know , so taking that on board , what was the actual wedding like ? Any craic?

Nah, the bride had a sour puss on her all day. They had some "half time show" thing with dancers and a magician that nobody paid any attention to.

My mam was at the wedding too, and she had the same dress as another woman, and the two of them had great craic getting pictures as twins - just taking it in their stride. The bride apparently had a few comments about them stealing some of her limelight.

I plastered a smile on my face, went through the motions, and left as soon as I could without more comments being made :pac:

chosen1 · 17-04-2021 11:10am

Not one I was at but this was a wedding that a work friend was invited to.

The couple had arranged their wedding in a fancy Italian resort and when the invites went out, they had given instructions for everybody to book the flight there and then as it would be the best deal they would get. Her and most if the people she knew booked her flights early and that was grand until the bride had a change of heart.

She decided that an abroad wedding was too inconvenient to people after some of her family told her they would not be going. She then booked a 5 star hotel in Kerry and sent out another invite to the guests. This was after most people had booked their flights and because the hotel was 5 star, not too many could afford a night's accommodation there.

Most of the people that my friend knew did not attend and many cut contact with her completely due to her self indulgence. Never found out in the end how many did show but terrible example of how not to plan a wedding.

Purple Mountain · 17-04-2021 1:00pm

^^^they got a holiday to Italy out of it

Ruining a wedding

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