Ruining a wedding

freshpopcorn

Speaking of steak there was a priest locally that would only go to the reception if he got steak.

blackcard

Not a disaster wedding but was best man at a wedding in Oz, ready to make my Best Man speech as everyone sat down at their tables. However, all the courses were served first. Bride and groom then went around to all the tables to have a chat with the guests. I ended up giving the speech about two hours later than I thought
About 60 people invited the next day to a barbecue at the home of the bride's parents. Brilliant, drinking beer beside their pool and having a steak. Then, we were invited inside to witness the formal opening of the gifts. Name of the person who gave the gift was announced and then the gift was opened up, the gift was announced to the applause of those congregated. Excruciating

Hego Damask

This is a great thread, but as I have read on in here getting a wedding invite is like a summons to court, well I got a summons, my wife's brother is getting married.

I more want to go to this wedding than I want another hole in my arse, it is in early September so I have 5 months to think of something.

I am actually hoping for a new ****ing covid wave that might cancel the feckin thing ....

Leg End Reject

blackcard wrote: »

Not a disaster wedding but was best man at a wedding in Oz, ready to make my Best Man speech as everyone sat down at their tables. However, all the courses were served first. Bride and groom then went around to all the tables to have a chat with the guests. I ended up giving the speech about two hours later than I thought
About 60 people invited the next day to a barbecue at the home of the bride's parents. Brilliant, drinking beer beside their pool and having a steak. Then, we were invited inside to witness the formal opening of the gifts. Name of the person who gave the gift was announced and then the gift was opened up, the gift was announced to the applause of those congregated. Excruciating

That sounds like those awful baby showers. Send a thank you card and be grateful for whatever you got!

Hego Damask

StupidLikeAFox wrote: »

Didn't ruin the wedding but was at a one where the the best man started the speech by listing all the great times he had with the groom, the big nights out and the casual pints etc, the times they had buzzing around together from school till now. Everyone waited for the punchline but it never came, the more he talked to more emotional he got. He never mentioned the bride or anyone else apart from the groom. Felt like a breakup

:D He knew he was lost !!

, happens to so many men when they get married, great for the craic and the pints and then they get married and they're ****ed

barney shamrock

Just a quick story about a wedding I was at many years ago with my mrs.

There was a girl who worked with my wife sitting at our table, I think she came to the wedding alone, no plus one.

She sort of stayed in our company for the entire wedding and she was really nice and great fun.

My wife doesn't really drink much so this girl (let's call her Anne) and myself started buying drinks for each other.

Pretty soon she was matching me drink for drink and it became a good natured drinking competition.

Lots of bottles of beer were consumed by both of us and I mentioned to my mrs that "Anne" was really nice and great fun.

She agreed and said she's always great fun on social occasions. 

Anyway a few days later my Mrs said to me "Oh you know your new best mate Anne that you were drinking with? She's admitted she's an alcoholic, has left work and checked into rehab"

"She said she's known she has a problem for ages but the wedding made her realise she has a problem and needs help"!

charlie14

blackcard wrote: »

Not a disaster wedding but was best man at a wedding in Oz, ready to make my Best Man speech as everyone sat down at their tables. However, all the courses were served first. Bride and groom then went around to all the tables to have a chat with the guests. I ended up giving the speech about two hours later than I thought
About 60 people invited the next day to a barbecue at the home of the bride's parents. Brilliant, drinking beer beside their pool and having a steak. Then, we were invited inside to witness the formal opening of the gifts. Name of the person who gave the gift was announced and then the gift was opened up, the gift was announced to the applause of those congregated. Excruciating

And people say we learned nothing from the Catholic church.

Where I come from in the Northwest, during wakes when I was young, there was a notebook and pen left by the local priest, the responsibility of one of the deceased`s family, where the amount of money given by those attending the wake was to be recorded and returned with the money (now the property of the priest) before the burial mass.
During the mass, the priest read out the list of names and the amount each contributed.

Hego Damask

Deeper Blue wrote: »

About 5 or 6 years ago I was at a wedding where the best man insulted homosexuals and disabled people in his speech. Extremely uncomfortable for everyone in the room that day. Still don't know what he was thinking.

Sure that would have been standard in any wedding speech before we went all PC mad !!!

Leg End Reject

charlie14 wrote: »

And people say we learned nothing from the Catholic church.

Where I come from in the Northwest, during wakes when I was young, there was a notebook and pen left by the local priest, the responsibility of one of the deceased`s family, where the amount of money given by those attending the wake was to be recorded and returned with the money (now the property of the priest) before the burial mass.
During the mass, the priest read out the list of names and the amount each contributed.

I've never heard of that! Talk about shaming people into donating. :eek:

Imagine being in charge of keeping the tally while grieving?

Witchie

I was at a friend's wedding and since my boyfriend of the time wouldn't come, I was flying solo. An ex of mine from my teenage years was also there alone and since everyone else was pretty much coupled up, him and I hit the bar hard together.

I got him doing jagerbombs with a shot of vodka with me. He tried to kiss me so I knew it was time to call it a night and headed off to bed.

Next morning the whole talk at breakfast was that he had gotten so drunk he hit on loads of women...including the bride! They were laughing about it but I was getting the blame for introducing him to vodka jagerbombs and abandoning him.

charlie14

Leg End Reject wrote: »

I've never heard of that! Talk about shaming people into donating. :eek:

Imagine being in charge of keeping the tally while grieving?

It was despicable, but like having to get clearance from the church where you were baptised before you can get married in a Catholic church, it was simple genius.
Whoever was in charge of the book had to make sure the "donations" tallied with the total amount or they were going to get it in the neck from the priest (and family in those days),and if they pocketed a few bob they would have got the same from the "donator" after the names and amounts were called out.

Motivator

I was at a wedding a few years ago with my wife, I didn’t know the people getting married so I didn’t know the backstory to the whole thing. We got to the hotel for the reception and it was all very awkward for some reason, not because I didn’t know anyone, but because there was a huge amount of tension everywhere I went. Lots of whispers and what appeared to be gossiping going on. The bar was full of it, the foyer was full of it and the patio for the smokers was full of it. I struck up a conversation with a guy at the bar just before we were due in for the meal and as the bell rang he just said “The main event is starting”. I didn’t know what it meant but I was intrigued.

Got in to our table and the speeches were starting more or less straightaway. A pint glass was produced and everyone agreed €20 was the stake. What I didn’t know was that it wasn’t about how long the speeches would be, but how long it would take the father of the bride to insult the bride’s mother - his ex wife. I didn’t know what was happening but I was very very curious.

The father stood up, produced an IPad and off he went. Insulted the ex wife after probably 30 seconds. Then insulted his daughter, his new son in law, the son in law’s parents and the staff at the hotel. One line that will always stay with me is “I always dreamed that when my daughter got married she would stop looking to me for handouts, but seeing as Brian is an underachiever i can see her being a drain on me financially for another few years”. This wasn’t a joke, it was typed out on a iPad and read aloud as seriously as anything. It was absolutely awful. He got all his insults out in the first five minutes and pretty much ruined the whole night. He bragged about his successes in business and in life and thanked his new girlfriend, sitting at the table opposite ours, for “finally making him happy“. He never once mentioned how happy he was for his daughter or wished the bride and groom any good luck whatsoever. He mentioned NAMA and how he hopes they can see him now, muttered something about his property in Spain and then just put the microphone down and then began scrolling on his iPad as the best man stood up. It was absolutely terrible and he had apparently shown his speech to someone that morning and word and rumours spread about how bad it was going to be. It completely ruined the evening and dominated all conversation. After the meal he put a few quid behind the bar and walked out with his girlfriend in tow.

touts

Was at a wedding where a guest got blind drunk and professed her love for the groom to him as himself and his new bride were making the traditional exit at the end of the night. Everyone was lined up wishing them well. Then we hear this one wailing and being lead away. Talking to someone closer to the incident it turned out she had thrown her arms around him said she loved him and asked what the bride had that she didn't have. Why had he never wanted her. That sort of thing. To be fair it was all sort of discreetly dealt with. Her friends brought her off and apparently they made an early departure the following morning before everyone was up for breakfast.

Was at another wedding where it turned out there was an exes table. Excluding the +1s it turned out most of the table had slept with either the bride or the groom. They twigged to this early on and to be fair it seems to have been taken as a joke by all of them. The Bride and Groom even spent time laughing and joking at the table. But talk about living dangerously.

touts

Oh yeah. Forgot one. All seemed to be going well until the mother of the groom who stood up and spoke about how great her boys were, how they were good "blackrock" boys. How they had all done her proud. How they had all been so successful thanks to their great up bringing. And how she would always be there for them even if they made mistakes in life. (At that point the room went silent). How no matter what a good mother would always forgive a son a bad choice and help him through it. (Now everyone starts looking at each other). How love is blind and how the bride would always be welcome in her house AS LONG AS the son loved her.

Marriage lasted about 18 months. Bride now happily in a relationship with another guy and they have a couple of kids. Groom is still single last I heard.

Louis Friend

There were 182 people at our wedding.

We didn’t do ‘Afters’ ‘cause we think that’s a joke.

We paid for our own wedding and it cost more than the €100 a head our social circle would typically give. Hence no concerns about “making money” from the exercise.

We have no wedding list and never had a discussion with anyone about presents.

From memory, we got around 8 presents. The rest of the guests gave cash. I think we got about €25,000 in cash plus a few nice gifts.

touts

touts wrote: »

Groom is still single last I heard.

Only if you ignore the relationship he has with his mum, Mrs Bates. :pac:

Eggs For Dinner

Louis Friend wrote: »

There were 182 people at our wedding.

We didn’t do ‘Afters’ ‘cause we think that’s a joke.

We paid for our own wedding and it cost more than the €100 a head our social circle would typically give. Hence no concerns about “making money” from the exercise.

We have no wedding list and never had a discussion with anyone about presents.

From memory, we got around 8 presents. The rest of the guests gave cash. I think we got about €25,000 in cash plus a few nice gifts.

I find it hard to believe anyone has 182 friends and family so close that you needed them to celebrate your special day. It may well have cost you more the the 25k you took in, but it sounds like you upped the attendee numbers to make it more cost effective

Sinus pain

Louis Friend wrote: »

There were 182 people at our wedding.

We didn’t do ‘Afters’ ‘cause we think that’s a joke.

We paid for our own wedding and it cost more than the €100 a head our social circle would typically give. Hence no concerns about “making money” from the exercise.

We have no wedding list and never had a discussion with anyone about presents.

From memory, we got around 8 presents. The rest of the guests gave cash. I think we got about €25,000 in cash plus a few nice gifts.

What ruined this wedding?

Eggs For Dinner

Eggs For Dinner wrote: »

I find it hard to believe anyone has 182 friends and family so close that you needed them to celebrate your special day. It may well have cost you more the the 25k you took in, but it sounds like you upped the attendee numbers to make it more cost effective

Fairly snipey thing to say and sounds a bit naive as to how things can work around wedding invites. We had similar ourselves and wouldn’t have left anyone off regardless of gifts or not.

Louis Friend

Eggs For Dinner wrote: »

I find it hard to believe anyone has 182 friends and family so close that you needed them to celebrate your special day. It may well have cost you more the the 25k you took in, but it sounds like you upped the attendee numbers to make it more cost effective

How so?

There were no fixed costs; literally every extra attendee just added extra cost.

My point is that not everyone is in in for the money.

chooseusername

Eggs For Dinner wrote: »

I find it hard to believe anyone has 182 friends and family so close that you needed them to celebrate your special day. It may well have cost you more the the 25k you took in, but it sounds like you upped the attendee numbers to make it more cost effective

If the cost per head was more than the €100 per head expected,
how would inviting more guests make up the shortfall.
More like the opposite would be the case.

Pawwed Rig

chooseusername wrote: »

If the cost per head was more than the €100 per head expected,
how would inviting more guests make up the shortfall.
More like the opposite would be the case.

Average cash gift was €137

25k/182

Not sure how the posters wedding was ruined by this though or the point of the post

Recliner

Eggs For Dinner wrote: »

I find it hard to believe anyone has 182 friends and family so close that you needed them to celebrate your special day. It may well have cost you more the the 25k you took in, but it sounds like you upped the attendee numbers to make it more cost effective

I was at a wedding pre Covid that had between 350 and 400 at it. TBH, it was ridiculous. May as well have been 5 different receptions going on. It felt really intimidating so everyone just stayed in their own areas. There were 3 bars, so it wasn't like people were meeting up there either. And the food wasn't great at all and the length of time it actually took to serve everyone was crazy. They also had a comedian and a magician in the middle of the meal and then some ridiculous song about the bride and groom that they wanted everyone to sing along with. Cringe!! Oh, and the reading of the cards which I thought was done away with.
It was the most dragged out reception ever.
If such a thing is possible, I actually believe that the sheer size ruined the wedding for me anyway.
That plus all the extra nonsense..

Louis Friend

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

Average cash gift was €137

25k/182

Not sure how the posters wedding was ruined by this though or the point of the post

The point of the post is to respond to people who assume that guest are invited as a money making exercise.

One slightly funny thing that did happen...the priest was lovely but quite old. My wife and I had a fair bit of horse trading over who would do readings and prayers of the faithful. Then the usual stuff with sorting out where the readers would sit, did they have the readings, etc.

And then the priest forget them!

Pawwed Rig

Louis Friend wrote: »

The point of the post is to respond to people who assume that guest are invited as a money making exercise.
!

But you invited a huge number of guests and made money?? €137 in gifts v costs of €100??

Anyway back to the juicy stories .....

ohnonotgmail

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

But you invited a huge number of guests and made money?? €137 in gifts v costs of €100??

Anyway back to the juicy stories .....

gifts normally come from a couple, the €100 is per head.

Pawwed Rig

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

Average cash gift was €137

25k/182

Not sure how the posters wedding was ruined by this though or the point of the post

At the risk of being pedantic would 25k/(182/2) be a likely closer formula ?

ohnonotgmail

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

gifts normally come from a couple, the €100 is per head.

Beaten to it but the sum would be higher.

chooseusername

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

But you invited a huge number of guests and made money?? €137 in gifts v costs of €100??

Anyway back to the juicy stories .....

You don't know the cost of the wedding ,
only that 182 guests contributed 25K

ohnonotgmail

chooseusername wrote: »

You don't know the cost of the wedding ,
only that 182 guests contributed 25K

they said it cost more than €100 a head.