Ruining a wedding

Toots wrote: »

Back when I used to work I a bank branch, I had an elderly couple come up to my desk one day wanting to make an international money transfer to the UK but they were having trouble filling in the form. I offered to fill it for them and asked had they got the details of where they wanted it sent, and the wife handed me what I thought was a postcard but it turned out to be a wedding invitation. Had a crappy little poem in it about how the couple already had everything they needed for their home and "rather than something we've already got, we'd appreciate money for our honeymoon pot".

My jaw just dropped when I saw it and the old man seeing my expression just chuckled and said that was pretty much the same reaction his wife had when she read it. They sent them €200!

I would have sent 2 euro. people are bigger ejits giving in to scroungers like that. I got invitations where they asked for money only, I never went and never gave them money or a gift either because of it.

Less stinge, more ruinations - except where the stinge lead to the ruination!

I'd give them honeymoon pot, over their fecking heads.

I was at one wedding in the UK (a well to do, pleasant couple). The best man (English groom's son) opened his speech with 'I see all the Irish have had the decency to park their caravans around the back'.

He was NOT popular.

My brother's wedding, I was the best man. The bride's cousins (an uncouth lot) started shouting during the speech. I ignored them and kept going, to much applause.

Yeah, I'm awesome.

Another family wedding, the poor best man got cold feet during the speech, said 'I can't do this' and walked off.

Yet another wedding in Swords, the father of the groom did his whole speech in Irish.

If he'd spoken French more people would have understood him.

I was at a wedding a number of years ago in a very fancy hotel where the residence bar didn't close. 7am, still serving, there was a good few people still there, mainly drunk as asses.
Anyway, there was a golf course with the first tee about 40ft from the front door of the residence bar. Anyway, one of the lads a bit worse for wear decided to go "for a walk". Everybody knew he was up to something.
About 30 seconds later, there he was, starkers, running across the first tee as 3-4 lads stood there about to tee off. It got worse when he slipped on the dew and prolonged the misery for the lads having to look at him in his birthday suit as they got ready to tee off for their golf.
I suppose it didn't ruin the wedding, just the golf.
Needless to say, the whole residence bar seen this happening and were breaking their hole laughing as 3 toffs stood there aghast at what they had just seen.

Some great stories in this thread. I've 2 quick ones from the best wedding I was ever at (so obviously it wasn't ruined).

For context on who one of the people was - he worked with the groom and I met him for the first time at the stag. You know these lads who are under the wife's thumb, but find themselves unsupervised on a stag and go wild? This guy was a caricature of that. I'd say he hadn't had a night out since his own wedding.

Anyway, onto the day itself. It was the first of my group of friends, so I was really getting carried away with how lovely and happy everything was during the ceremony. Doesn't everyone look lovely, the weather is beautiful, isn't a wedding ceremony beautiful? And then the priests sermon. He had known the bride since she was young. He knew that she loved ballet as a child and was big into yoga now and thought he could work his sermon around that. So, bride for as long as he's known her has always stretched herself. As a child she did ballet and kept herself stretched. As an adult she took up yoga. Again stretching herself. And it's important for couples not just to be comfortable, but to keep their lives interesting. And looking at the couple who I don't know how they kept it together, said Groom, your role now is stretch bride. And keep her stretched into the future. I've heard some good best man speeches, but this was by an enormous distance the funniest wedding speech I've ever heard.

And on that guy I met at the stag.... I met him with the wife at the wedding reception. I drove straight from the Chruch to the venue and found them sitting down. Two pints and two chasers in front of them and two empty pints and chasers in front of them. Turns out I completely misjudged them! He didn't have a wife that kept him under a leash, he in fact had met his soulmate! During the speeches before dinner he got sick into a glass at his table (the one beside the top table). And he was still partying with the wife until roughly sunrise.

That wedding weekend was probably the best of my life. Please don't mention to my own wife!

Ive another one.
I was a groomsman at a friends wedding.
The bride gave both groomsmen, best man and groom instructions that the jackets were to be kept on all during the meal and the speeches (About 2 hours altogether), so that the pictures and video looked nice.
It was the hottest day of the year. Ive seem the pictures and the video. All 4 of us were sitting there pouring buckets of sweat, you could even see coming through the jackets and dripping off our chins while we were eating. One of the most grueling 2 hours of my life. Id say i lost about 2 stone that day. And there must have been some whiff off us.

And the one where I was the best man. Id had a few pints. People were still arriving into the evening giving me cards.
I would leave the cards on the end of the table and then every 20 mins i would go up to the room and leave the bunch of cards in it.
At one point i went to do this and the cards were gone off the table, probably 6 or 7 of them.
I didnt want to tell them they had thieves at their wedding so just said nothing.

Was at a wedding in America. Groom, family & a few friends all from Ireland. The rest all middle class Americans.

Morning of the wedding the best man hits the hotel bar to calm the nerves.. fast forward 10 hours later of drinking in between the ceremony and he staggers up to the mic and starts his speech in an American accent (where ever the feck it came from), reading off a crumbled to death piece of paper he got as far as line 2 and reverting back to his west Ireland voice just kept repeating ''I swear to god..'' he was literally blind drunk, forgot the speech and couldn't read it off the ruined sheet. Chief bridesmaid forced the mic off him and ran him off the floor.

If sunk any further into my seat I'd of been underground. Looking back on it now it was ****ing hilarious!

Toots wrote: »

Back when I used to work I a bank branch, I had an elderly couple come up to my desk one day wanting to make an international money transfer to the UK but they were having trouble filling in the form. I offered to fill it for them and asked had they got the details of where they wanted it sent, and the wife handed me what I thought was a postcard but it turned out to be a wedding invitation. Had a crappy little poem in it about how the couple already had everything they needed for their home and "rather than something we've already got, we'd appreciate money for our honeymoon pot".

My jaw just dropped when I saw it and the old man seeing my expression just chuckled and said that was pretty much the same reaction his wife had when she read it. They sent them €200!

I think that's absolutely horrendous. My two favourite gifts from my wedding was a beautiful vase and lovely painting. Yes the majority did give us money but that's people own choice. Can't believe people would ask for money.

Off topic but having done best man at my brother’s wedding I think if people had been coming up to me all night handing me toasters and porcelain figurines and whatever else, half of it would have ended up broken or left behind.