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Ruining a wedding

cena

Has anyone here ruined a wedding or been to a wedding that was ruined? Let us say, someone has stood up during the mass service and said that this person should not marry him or she.

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irish_goat

My cousin is getting married this year and I'm looking forward to it. He was throwing our granny around the dancefloor at my brother's wedding and it's regularly brought up as a funny story at family events. Found out only last week that he did the same to the mother of the bride at another wedding and ended up breaking her arm. :pac:

Toots

Back when I used to work I a bank branch, I had an elderly couple come up to my desk one day wanting to make an international money transfer to the UK but they were having trouble filling in the form. I offered to fill it for them and asked had they got the details of where they wanted it sent, and the wife handed me what I thought was a postcard but it turned out to be a wedding invitation. Had a crappy little poem in it about how the couple already had everything they needed for their home and "rather than something we've already got, we'd appreciate money for our honeymoon pot".

My jaw just dropped when I saw it and the old man seeing my expression just chuckled and said that was pretty much the same reaction his wife had when she read it. They sent them €200!

pgj2015

Toots wrote: »

Back when I used to work I a bank branch, I had an elderly couple come up to my desk one day wanting to make an international money transfer to the UK but they were having trouble filling in the form. I offered to fill it for them and asked had they got the details of where they wanted it sent, and the wife handed me what I thought was a postcard but it turned out to be a wedding invitation. Had a crappy little poem in it about how the couple already had everything they needed for their home and "rather than something we've already got, we'd appreciate money for our honeymoon pot".

My jaw just dropped when I saw it and the old man seeing my expression just chuckled and said that was pretty much the same reaction his wife had when she read it. They sent them €200!

I would have sent 2 euro. people are bigger ejits giving in to scroungers like that. I got invitations where they asked for money only, I never went and never gave them money or a gift either because of it.

partyguinness

Toots wrote: »

. Had a crappy little poem in it about how the couple already had everything they needed for their home and "rather than something we've already got, we'd appreciate money for our honeymoon pot".

My jaw just dropped when I saw it and the old man seeing my expression just

That is exactly the same as our lady here did...a crappy little rhyming poem about the Honeymoon Pot.

“Here…have this food basket” said I.

odyssey06

Less stinge, more ruinations - except where the stinge lead to the ruination!

[Deleted User]

Toots wrote:

Back when I used to work I a bank branch, I had an elderly couple come up to my desk one day wanting to make an international money transfer to the UK but they were having trouble filling in the form. I offered to fill it for them and asked had they got the details of where they wanted it sent, and the wife handed me what I thought was a postcard but it turned out to be a wedding invitation. Had a crappy little poem in it about how the couple already had everything they needed for their home and "rather than something we've already got, we'd appreciate money for our honeymoon pot".

No class whatsoever there.

Hangdogroad

I'd give them honeymoon pot, over their fecking heads.

[Deleted User]

Twas a good thread when it wasnt just people moaning about weddings, this

The One Doctor

I was at one wedding in the UK (a well to do, pleasant couple). The best man (English groom's son) opened his speech with 'I see all the Irish have had the decency to park their caravans around the back'.

He was NOT popular.

My brother's wedding, I was the best man. The bride's cousins (an uncouth lot) started shouting during the speech. I ignored them and kept going, to much applause.

Yeah, I'm awesome.

Another family wedding, the poor best man got cold feet during the speech, said 'I can't do this' and walked off.

Yet another wedding in Swords, the father of the groom did his whole speech in Irish.

If he'd spoken French more people would have understood him.

PhilOssophy

Deleted User wrote: »

Twas a good thread when it wasnt just people moaning about weddings, this

You can never have a thread about anything wedding related on here without some misery guts posting "I hate weddings" zzzzzz

I'm sure many have ruined a wedding by being a miserable shet for a day!

PhilOssophy

I was at a wedding a number of years ago in a very fancy hotel where the residence bar didn't close. 7am, still serving, there was a good few people still there, mainly drunk as asses.
Anyway, there was a golf course with the first tee about 40ft from the front door of the residence bar. Anyway, one of the lads a bit worse for wear decided to go "for a walk". Everybody knew he was up to something.
About 30 seconds later, there he was, starkers, running across the first tee as 3-4 lads stood there about to tee off. It got worse when he slipped on the dew and prolonged the misery for the lads having to look at him in his birthday suit as they got ready to tee off for their golf.
I suppose it didn't ruin the wedding, just the golf.
Needless to say, the whole residence bar seen this happening and were breaking their hole laughing as 3 toffs stood there aghast at what they had just seen.

FlubberJones

My brothers wedding many years ago, I was the best man, at that time not used to speaking to crowds (all that has changed) but anyway I had a half glass full of Jameson in front of me about 15 mins before my speech... by the time I was starting it was almost empty and in honesty I'd had a good few beers prior to that... my speech seemed to go on FOREVER and even now my brother laughs and says it added an hour to the wedding video... I can hardly remember the last half of it and by the time we were at the night event I was LEATHERED.
It didn't ruin it but it certainly didn't add any value... bar my particularly flaccid appearance for the rest of the day

blue note

Some great stories in this thread. I've 2 quick ones from the best wedding I was ever at (so obviously it wasn't ruined).

For context on who one of the people was - he worked with the groom and I met him for the first time at the stag. You know these lads who are under the wife's thumb, but find themselves unsupervised on a stag and go wild? This guy was a caricature of that. I'd say he hadn't had a night out since his own wedding.

Anyway, onto the day itself. It was the first of my group of friends, so I was really getting carried away with how lovely and happy everything was during the ceremony. Doesn't everyone look lovely, the weather is beautiful, isn't a wedding ceremony beautiful? And then the priests sermon. He had known the bride since she was young. He knew that she loved ballet as a child and was big into yoga now and thought he could work his sermon around that. So, bride for as long as he's known her has always stretched herself. As a child she did ballet and kept herself stretched. As an adult she took up yoga. Again stretching herself. And it's important for couples not just to be comfortable, but to keep their lives interesting. And looking at the couple who I don't know how they kept it together, said Groom, your role now is stretch bride. And keep her stretched into the future. I've heard some good best man speeches, but this was by an enormous distance the funniest wedding speech I've ever heard.

And on that guy I met at the stag.... I met him with the wife at the wedding reception. I drove straight from the Chruch to the venue and found them sitting down. Two pints and two chasers in front of them and two empty pints and chasers in front of them. Turns out I completely misjudged them! He didn't have a wife that kept him under a leash, he in fact had met his soulmate! During the speeches before dinner he got sick into a glass at his table (the one beside the top table). And he was still partying with the wife until roughly sunrise.

That wedding weekend was probably the best of my life. Please don't mention to my own wife!

EmmetSpiceland

Does anyone, actually, get “gifts” for a wedding? I’ve never bought one. Couple of hundred quid in a card and that’s that.

Much handier than having to shop for something and then have to lug it around with you until you can “off load” it on the best man, or someone else.

JohnMcm1

Heard of a wedding where the best man and groom had to be put to bed before the meal.

kildare lad

partyguinness wrote: »

When I got married in England. It was a small affair and only about 30 sat down to dinner...more came to the afters.

At least two of the English couples who sat down (friends of wife) didn't give us so much as a card. Took all the free booze, free food, several rounds of drinks from the Irish couples at the table but never bought back. Nothing. Not even a card and they dressed like slobs too.

One of the women was/is a 'big girl' and like a lot of big girls she dyes her hair stupid lurid red/purple. Husband looks like a grenade exploded near his face with all the piercings and tatts everywhere..no shirt or tie...grubby fcukers ruining the pics.

I'd a mate whose a miserable fxcker and after spending all his money at the wedding of a good mate of ours, he went up and took the 50 quid he gave the couple back out of the card .

Another time we were driving to a wedding and we stopped off at a shop to get some cards. He left the card in the car when we got to the wedding , anyway about 2 weeks after the wedding the groom rings me . He told me he was talking to the miserable fxcker , who told him he forgot to give him the card at the wedding as he'd left it in my car . I told the groom he was welcome to come and get the card but it was still in it's plastic wrapping unused in the side door of the car.

JimmyVik

Ive another one.
I was a groomsman at a friends wedding.
The bride gave both groomsmen, best man and groom instructions that the jackets were to be kept on all during the meal and the speeches (About 2 hours altogether), so that the pictures and video looked nice.
It was the hottest day of the year. Ive seem the pictures and the video. All 4 of us were sitting there pouring buckets of sweat, you could even see coming through the jackets and dripping off our chins while we were eating. One of the most grueling 2 hours of my life. Id say i lost about 2 stone that day. And there must have been some whiff off us.

And the one where I was the best man. Id had a few pints. People were still arriving into the evening giving me cards.
I would leave the cards on the end of the table and then every 20 mins i would go up to the room and leave the bunch of cards in it.
At one point i went to do this and the cards were gone off the table, probably 6 or 7 of them.
I didnt want to tell them they had thieves at their wedding so just said nothing.

nibtrix

Pinch Flat wrote: »

I went to a wedding about 15 years ago. Groom was a bit of a lad. As part of his speech he asked all the ladies he'd shagged to drop up copies of keys to his front door to the top table. About 10 or so ladies stood up, went up kissed him on the cheek and handed him a door key. Groom ended up having an affair soon after they were married an they were separated soon after.

I was at a wedding where the bridesmaid tried to do that to the bride (her sister). Except she just asked a couple of mates to hand out keys to a bunch of guys and didn't really explain the whole thing, so they ended up being given to a lot of uncles and cousins of the bride :eek::eek:

There was a lot of flinging keys across tables to other, non-related men when the "bit" was announced in the bridesmaids speech

lemonkey

Was at a wedding in America. Groom, family & a few friends all from Ireland. The rest all middle class Americans.

Morning of the wedding the best man hits the hotel bar to calm the nerves.. fast forward 10 hours later of drinking in between the ceremony and he staggers up to the mic and starts his speech in an American accent (where ever the feck it came from), reading off a crumbled to death piece of paper he got as far as line 2 and reverting back to his west Ireland voice just kept repeating ''I swear to god..'' he was literally blind drunk, forgot the speech and couldn't read it off the ruined sheet. Chief bridesmaid forced the mic off him and ran him off the floor.

If sunk any further into my seat I'd of been underground. Looking back on it now it was ****ing hilarious!

ongarboy

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Does anyone, actually, get “gifts” for a wedding? I’ve never bought one. Couple of hundred quid in a card and that’s that.

Much handier than having to shop for something and then have to lug it around with you until you can “off load” it on the best man, or someone else.

I think the days of getting 10 deep fat fryer gifts on your wedding day stopped in the 90s. For some reason gift lists/registries never took off in Ireland. Too much "the nerve of them" reaction even though any foreign wedding I went to had them and it made gift giving so easy and no-one thought it was presumptuous.

Cash is fine but I'm suspicious of any couple who invites 400 "acquaintances" to their wedding... handy revenue stream....!

I've no ruined wedding anecdotes per se but witnessed numerous best man speeches that went on way too long and that no one outside of the stag party got or found funny.

[Deleted User]

EmmetSpiceland wrote:

Does anyone, actually, get â€œgiftsâ€ for a wedding? Iâ€™ve never bought one. Couple of hundred quid in a card and thatâ€™s that.

Not all people that give gifts are cheapskates but most that do usually are. Some of them are obvious pass ons of crap they got as a gift themselves.

[Deleted User]

nibtrix wrote: »

I was at a wedding where the bridesmaid tried to do that to the bride (her sister). Except she just asked a couple of mates to hand out keys to a bunch of guys and didn't really explain the whole thing, so they ended up being given to a lot of uncles and cousins of the bride :eek::eek:

There was a lot of flinging keys across tables to other, non-related men when the "bit" was announced in the bridesmaids speech

Its an old trope

Best execution of it i ever saw was three of his mates sauntering up with keys, blowing the grooms kisses

appledrop

Toots wrote: »

Back when I used to work I a bank branch, I had an elderly couple come up to my desk one day wanting to make an international money transfer to the UK but they were having trouble filling in the form. I offered to fill it for them and asked had they got the details of where they wanted it sent, and the wife handed me what I thought was a postcard but it turned out to be a wedding invitation. Had a crappy little poem in it about how the couple already had everything they needed for their home and "rather than something we've already got, we'd appreciate money for our honeymoon pot".

My jaw just dropped when I saw it and the old man seeing my expression just chuckled and said that was pretty much the same reaction his wife had when she read it. They sent them €200!

I think that's absolutely horrendous. My two favourite gifts from my wedding was a beautiful vase and lovely painting. Yes the majority did give us money but that's people own choice. Can't believe people would ask for money.

[Deleted User]

JimmyVik wrote: »

Ive another one.
I was a groomsman at a friends wedding.
The bride gave both groomsmen, best man and groom instructions that the jackets were to be kept on all during the meal and the speeches (About 2 hours altogether), so that the pictures and video looked nice.
It was the hottest day of the year. Ive seem the pictures and the video. All 4 of us were sitting there pouring buckets of sweat, you could even see coming through the jackets and dripping off our chins while we were eating. One of the most grueling 2 hours of my life. Id say i lost about 2 stone that day. And there must have been some whiff off us.

Ive a few done now where ive had a role on the day, i bring a spare shirt and dash off for a shower after the dinner if i can these days

[Deleted User]

appledrop wrote: »

I think that's absolutely horrendous. My two favourite gifts from my wedding was a beautiful vase and lovely painting. Yes the majority did give us money but that's people own choice. Can't believe people would ask for money.

Cant believe people would be bothered buying gifts tbh

appledrop

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Cant believe people would be bothered buying gifts tbh

We only got a few gifts and some were from people who couldn't make it on the day but still sent a gift which I thought was lovely.

Collie D

Off topic but having done best man at my brother’s wedding I think if people had been coming up to me all night handing me toasters and porcelain figurines and whatever else, half of it would have ended up broken or left behind.

appledrop

My husband worked in hotel while in college so plenty of stories about things going wrong at weddings.

So it was getting near the end of the night and the wedding couple had organised a wedding bus to drop people home at end of night which was popular years ago for those who lived local.

People were on the bus waiting for driver who for whatever reason had gone into hotel, probably to use the bathroom.

Anyway one of the guests decided he wasn't waiting any longer and decided that he would drive the bus himself and drop everyone home!

He was plastered of course so didn't get very far until he crashed the bus into cars in the car park.

Guards were called and that was the end of that wedding.

The poor bride and groom only doing their best for the guests.

Seth Brundle

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Cant believe people would be bothered buying gifts tbh

As I look around my house, I see things that friends and relations bought us for our wedding (we had a wedding list in Arnotts). They have meaning and much better than money (if we were that stuck for money we wouldn't have spent money on a wedding)!

Neyite

Scottish wedding.
The groom and bride during the long long ceremony were sat on the right hand side of the church facing the congregation, on the alter so were about 3 steps up from the rest of us.

We became aware of a bit of a flurry on that side of the church with several guests making hand gestures and a fair bit of mutterings that went on for ages.

Turns out that his usual manner of sitting with his legs wide apart was not how one sits while wearing a kilt. He was flashing his junk to half the church for at least 30 solid minutes.