Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

Graces7 · 09-03-2021 8:43pm

YoshiSays wrote: »

Beating myself up cause I was having a lie in. It was only 8:30 on a Sunday. Beautiful morning but the neighbors dog just barking, barking getting in my nerves. I wish they'd tell him to stfu. But they have no consideration for anyone or they are deaf or stupid or something. Really.

By all means ask your neighbours is the dog OK as it is barking a lot? "Does it need the vet? "

Ear plugs? I use them when the dog at the farm starts.

Graces7 · 09-03-2021 8:50pm

One More Toy wrote: »

I get awful panic attacks upon waking, I've tried everything including valium, anyone with any suggestions?

Please take care with Valium. It is horrendously and swiftly addictive and getting off it is literally hellish..

One More Toy · 09-03-2021 9:31pm

Graces7 wrote: »

Please take care with Valium. It is horrendously and swiftly addictive and getting off it is literally hellish..

I know all too well unfortunately, at the weekends I can get away without them no problem. Doctor gas reduced my dose recently too

New Home · 10-03-2021 12:37am

Hi folks, if anyone is interested, there's a programme now on on RTÉ1 where Alastair Campbell talks about his depression - "Depression and me". It's very interesting, he's trying to understand it a bit more, he's talking to a psychiatrist about medications, etc.

https://www.rte.ie/player/onnow

guitarzero · 10-03-2021 4:10am

Anyone enthusiastic about the recent developments in psychedelic therapy? Doing a lot of reading around it and it seems pretty credible. Many of the studies are very positive and trials seem to indicate that they can be very beneficial done in the correct setting.
Also been reading about a ketamine derivative being used to alleviate depression and PTSD.
A bit of hope :pac:

Wanderer78 · 10-03-2021 6:39am

New Home wrote:

Hi folks, if anyone is interested, there's a programme now on on RTÃ‰1 where Alastair Campbell talks about his depression - "Depression and me". It's very interesting, he's trying to understand it a bit more, he's talking to a psychiatrist about medications, etc.

I've been aware of Campbell and his mental health issues for a long time, I must watch this, something about the man I like

Graces7 · 10-03-2021 7:49am

One More Toy wrote: »

I know all too well unfortunately, at the weekends I can get away without them no problem. Doctor gas reduced my dose recently too

I was also very reliably informed that one of the side effects of Valium is suicidal thoughts. Which I was suffering badly from when I was on it. And when I stopped, that vanished too. Thankfully. The mind is a fragile and vulnerable organism.

fr336 · 10-03-2021 1:08pm

Hi all long time no post! Hope you are all well or not too bad. Just posting to say after 7 months on Citalopram I"m now in the process of coming off them. I started on 10mg which wasn't too bad but didn't produce huge positive changes. I then increased to standard 20mg dose and god at first I didnt realise but it turned me into a right zombie, groggy in morning, wanting junk food, not enjoying things as much anymore (yes I know depression does that but this was an unnatural feeling altogether) etc. Then a few weeks ago I woke up in middle of night with horrid dizziness and nausea. Had never experienced before. Anyway I struggled on but about a week ago went down from 20mg to 10. Feel less zombie and less tired. Now I wanted to reduce to 5mg but doesn't seem easy to get in tablet form. Anyway today I'm not taking anything, I just really cant take another morning of this crap. I'm not going off it cold turkey I just want to see how I feel tomorrow and go from there. I just need hope and a natural feeling. I'd rather be naturally down than drug down if that makes sense. Also makes me laugh a lot of the withdrawal symptoms are the same as the side effects of being on the thing ðŸ˜‚

PS I'm not running down the meds they work amazingly for some people including my mum. I'm just not suited to it. What they have done is given me perspective and how things like exercise DO work. And also made me grateful for all the stuff I DO have.

Meeoow · 10-03-2021 2:14pm

fr336 wrote: »

PS I'm not running down the meds they work amazingly for some people including my mum. I'm just not suited to it. What they have done is given me perspective and how things like exercise DO work. And also made me grateful for all the stuff I DO have.

Well done to you. I am glad you are grateful for what you have. It is hard to be thankful for the good things when you have depression.
Can you bite the tablets in half? It is certainly better to taper off them slowly.
Anti depressants worked well for me over the last 19 odd years. But the last time I took them, I got tinnitus from them, which is still with me even after I stopped them.
They probably saved my life 20 years ago, but there can be a price to pay with them, and should only be used when necessary.

New Home · 10-03-2021 3:05pm

New Home wrote: »

Hi folks, if anyone is interested, there's a programme now on on RTÉ1 where Alastair Campbell talks about his depression - "Depression and me". It's very interesting, he's trying to understand it a bit more, he's talking to a psychiatrist about medications, etc.

https://www.rte.ie/player/onnow

Available on the RTÉ player for the next 30 days.

https://www.rte.ie/player/movie/depression-and-me-e1/184365608326

fr336 · 10-03-2021 10:10pm

Well I will be back to taking the Citalopram tomorrow as tonight I feel very grey! Get diet and exercise nailed, THEN go off the meds

YoshiSays · 10-03-2021 11:20pm

New Home wrote: »

Available on the RTÉ player for the next 30 days.

https://www.rte.ie/player/movie/depression-and-me-e1/184365608326

Very good, matter of fact view of depression and treatments. I like the jam jar analogy, where your body/mind can only cope with so much crap and you need to enlarge the jam jar with treatments/exercise/things that give you joy/etc to cope. I would think though, that it should be possible to remove some of the crap too.

tdf7187 · 10-03-2021 11:41pm

A lot of people dismiss Campbell due to the Iraq war fiasco but I agree that he has sensible and helpful things to say about alcoholism and depression. I have read his blog before.

tdf7187 · 10-03-2021 11:42pm

fr336 wrote: »

Well I will be back to taking the Citalopram tomorrow as tonight I feel very grey! Get diet and exercise nailed, THEN go off the meds

I think that makes sense.

RabbleRouser2k · 12-03-2021 5:42pm

Sleep's gone all over the place the last week or so.

The weather's not helping, especially the pelting rain and hailstones. 20 hour sleeps not abnormal.

Graces7 · 13-03-2021 12:50am

RabbleRouser2k wrote: »

Sleep's gone all over the place the last week or so.

The weather's not helping, especially the pelting rain and hailstones. 20 hour sleeps not abnormal.

It is fretting about it that does the damage. I am far more at ese since I just sleep when I sleep etc, but then I have almost no "obligations" to anyone time wise. As long as I can connect with family in Canada a few days a week ie at 3 am here my life and how I live it is mine. And of course I am ooooooooooolld! And we all know about old ladies and our naps and night prowling!

OK; about to reinsert wonderful wax ear plugs and symbolically shut the storm out!

Life is truly awesome.. As long as I have painkillers and cats I can cope with anything. And sleep of course! zzzzzzzzzz

RabbleRouser2k · 13-03-2021 7:34am

Graces7 wrote: »

It is fretting about it that does the damage. I am far more at ese since I just sleep when I sleep etc, but then I have almost no "obligations" to anyone time wise. As long as I can connect with family in Canada a few days a week ie at 3 am here my life and how I live it is mine. And of course I am ooooooooooolld! And we all know about old ladies and our naps and night prowling!

OK; about to reinsert wonderful wax ear plugs and symbolically shut the storm out!

Life is truly awesome.. As long as I have painkillers and cats I can cope with anything. And sleep of course! zzzzzzzzzz

I don't like it. It makes me angry to not be productive, like I'm undeserving of life. I don't like missing days.

Wanderer78 · 13-03-2021 7:37am

RabbleRouser2k wrote:

I don't like it. It makes me angry to not be productive, like I'm undeserving of life. I don't like missing days.

This 'productivity' nonsense is driving me insane, humans are not productive machines, we 're complex emotional beings, please be kind to yourself. it's okay to have sh1tty days, but I do understand the feeling, it's very frustrating

Graces7 · 13-03-2021 9:22am

RabbleRouser2k wrote: »

I don't like it. It makes me angry to not be productive, like I'm undeserving of life. I don't like missing days.

OK; I hear you. NB I am nearly 80 and that does make a difference in attitude.

Little Is expected of me and in fact I work hard at whatever there is to do. But many days through illness I can apparently do very little; not my choice. Not yours either ? It is making a choice that alters this

What do you mean by " productive? Resting etc is also productive as it renews you for the next days. just surviving is productive.

No one is judging you so why judge yourself?

And life is still awesome and wonderful.

Gremlinertia · 13-03-2021 1:28pm

Mental and physical health pretty low. Disinterest in everything, self care non-existent, i know it will change but it's so tough right now i can't believe that it will..

Graces7 · 13-03-2021 2:08pm

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Mental and physical health pretty low. Disinterest in everything, self care non-existent, i know it will change but it's so tough right now i can't believe that it will..

Just keep putting one foot in front of the other one at a time. I used to look at the clock and say " In half an hour I will feel better..." then again and again.. Limit it to a short time. A ti ny taste rather than a great plateful Shuffling step rather tan a great LEAP!

I am a wreck just now. Lack of sleep with the gales has exacerbated the M.E to a severe degree. Longing for three o'clock which s the earliest I will allow myself to close down for the day and sleep. I can see why ignorant folk use t think I was depressed etc; i am not; I am just ill. Managing very odd food things that need no work! Been here so many times it is second nature. No use fretting; just endure and wait.

Old saying by someone with great stresses and dangers.. " This too shall pass,"

We are all stressed out. Even me on this tiny peaceful and non threatening island. With great care being shown me. Just is the way life is with the pandemic.

Hang on in there!

tdf7187 · 13-03-2021 2:33pm

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Mental and physical health pretty low. Disinterest in everything, self care non-existent, i know it will change but it's so tough right now i can't believe that it will..

I'm not great either. I've been lucky with my physical health considering my alcohol abuse over the years but mental health quite poor at the moment.

YoshiSays · 13-03-2021 7:33pm

Have a knot in my stomach all day, and my nerves are killing me, anxious about **** in work and all the rest of the ****. And I'm affecting everyone else in the house. I'm just impossible to be around. Isolating in the attic room like a hermit all the time. Nuts.

Meeoow · 13-03-2021 9:06pm

Same here. Anxious about work. I wish I could afford to leave. I am seriously considering leaving, and taking a few months off.

elvis83 · 13-03-2021 11:38pm

Exact same in relation to work stress. Had my sleep all over the place. And that inevitably leads to negative thinking and spiralling and guilt for some sh1tty thing I did 10 years ago....

It's so frustrating and I'm so exhausted all the time. Cranky and irritable also, so not much fun for the rest of the family either. Another thing to feel guilty about.

YoshiSays · 13-03-2021 11:55pm

Drank a lot of water, had dinner and feel a bit better. Think I'd been drinking tea all day, no water. Caffeine, cold, hunger, tiredness, news all make me more anxious.

Keep forgetting to drink water though ...

tdf7187 · 14-03-2021 12:07am

I'm anxious about work and I don't even have a job, lol!

I am starting a TUS scheme employment as a caretaker in a local school on Monday. Any 'normal' person would find this p.iss easy and not be troubled, and I would have myself when my mental health was ok, but I'm not as young as I used to be.

tdf7187 · 14-03-2021 12:09am

YoshiSays wrote: »

Drank a lot of water, had dinner and feel a bit better. Think I'd been drinking tea all day, no water. Caffeine, cold, hunger, tiredness, news all make me more anxious.

Keep forgetting to drink water though ...

I overindulge in the caffeine myself.

One thing I'd say is try sparkling water, I kind of get a 'buzz' off it.

greentealatte · 14-03-2021 12:22am

Just been harassed by a few users on here. I kind of anticipated it due to the nature of the post so not surprised but it didn't feel great when I'm already dealing with a lot on top of depression and anxiety.

YoshiSays · 14-03-2021 12:25am

tdf7187 wrote: »

I'm anxious about work and I don't even have a job, lol!

I am starting a TUS scheme employment as a caretaker in a local school on Monday. Any 'normal' person would find this p.iss easy and not be troubled, and I would have myself when my mental health was ok, but I'm not as young as I used to be.

You'll be fine once you get started and Monday is over.

tdf7187 · 14-03-2021 12:47am

YoshiSays wrote: »

You'll be fine once you get started and Monday is over.

Thanks I think that's true.

RabbleRouser2k · 14-03-2021 8:20am

Wanderer78 wrote: »

*words removed just for brevity*

Graces7 wrote: »

*same as above*

Thank you both, I needed to hear that. I'm my worst critic-I always feel like I'm not doing 'enough'.

Wanderer78 · 14-03-2021 8:22am

RabbleRouser2k wrote:

Thank you both, I needed to hear that. I'm my worst critic-I always feel like I'm not doing 'enough'.

Keep the chin up, it's a very difficult time for everyone, I'm slipping myself, thankfully going mountain biking today

Gremlinertia · 14-03-2021 6:03pm

Trying everything to keep the head up today but I'm thinking off to bed soon, I tried.

tdf7187 · 14-03-2021 11:47pm

How is everyone this evening?

poisonated · 15-03-2021 12:16am

greentealatte wrote: »

Just been harassed by a few users on here. I kind of anticipated it due to the nature of the post so not surprised but it didn't feel great when I'm already dealing with a lot on top of depression and anxiety.

I’m sorry to hear you were harassed. Some of the posters here can get that way. Most are nice though!my ocd in recent weeks has been kind of rough. I get kind of paranoid and worry about unlikely situations. Sometimes I give out to people who aren’t being nice to me and I overreact. Sometimes I feel like there is no way out. I feel hopeless and find it difficult to carry on. I’ve been doing lots of walking and it eases the pain but only temporarily but then I build up these situations in my head. I just find it difficult to cope with the fact that my ocd isn’t ever going to go away.

Wanderer78 · 15-03-2021 9:03am

tdf7187 wrote:

How is everyone this evening?

Much better today thank god, mountain biking really does work for me, how's your world?

RabbleRouser2k · 15-03-2021 10:11am

poisonated wrote: »

I’m sorry to hear you were harassed. Some of the posters here can get that way. Most are nice though!my ocd in recent weeks has been kind of rough. I get kind of paranoid and worry about unlikely situations. Sometimes I give out to people who aren’t being nice to me and I overreact. Sometimes I feel like there is no way out. I feel hopeless and find it difficult to carry on. I’ve been doing lots of walking and it eases the pain but only temporarily but then I build up these situations in my head. I just find it difficult to cope with the fact that my ocd isn’t ever going to go away.

Regarding harassment-yeah, I've gotten a few unwanted pm's that would constitute harassment. If they get really bad, report them. (I've never had to, but those users tend to get banned because of mass harassment).

As for OCD. Those thoughts can be brutal. What helped me, a little, was reading up on the condition. I don't know what kind of OCD you have, whether it's thought based, or compulsion based (or maybe both) but a good book that helped me was 'Tormenting Thoughts, and Secret Rituals' by Ian Osborn. It's not a cure, but it's very helpful in understanding.

One More Toy · 15-03-2021 11:33am

Absolutely struggling today with work. Don't know how I'll reach bed time tonight

Gremlinertia · 15-03-2021 12:37pm

One More Toy wrote: »

Absolutely struggling today with work. Don't know how I'll reach bed time tonight

You will get there, think in smaller time increments, get to the next half hour, lunch, toilet break at three. Little steps. Well done for making the steps to get there in the first place.

YoshiSays · 15-03-2021 1:01pm

Left my phone off all day yesterday. No internet or technology or news or TV or "entertainment" ... I just sat in a quiet room for a few hours over the day. Cleared the room of clutter and let my thoughts go past. Was unreal. Felt like coming off a hangover.

Recommend you try.

Now, back online again for work. And it's the usual chaos, panic and rush. But I have an outsider perspective now at least for a short while.

So, get off the technology/internet stream roller for a while and give your mind a rest. It will just overwhelm you.

Note: saying this as someone who makes a living off this steam roller.

Graces7 · 15-03-2021 1:30pm

Gremlinertia wrote: »

You will get there, think in smaller time increments, get to the next half hour, lunch, toilet break at three. Little steps. Well done for making the steps to get there in the first place.

My technique for decades. Just now aiming for 3 pm when I can take more codeine and crash. Crawling on the floor just now, and even that it too much

Graces7 · 15-03-2021 1:51pm

YoshiSays wrote: »

Left my phone off all day yesterday. No internet or technology or news or TV or "entertainment" ... I just sat in a quiet room for a few hours over the day. Cleared the room of clutter and let my thoughts go past. Was unreal. Felt like coming off a hangover.

Recommend you try.

Now, back online again for work. And it's the usual chaos, panic and rush. But I have an outsider perspective now at least for a short while.

So, get off the technology/internet stream roller for a while and give your mind a rest. It will just overwhelm you.

Note: saying this as someone who makes a living off this steam roller.

My phone is outgoing calls only so never on. Here depends. I am sick this week to online more as distraction. I watch youtube a fair amount. No TV or radio TV r rdaio

charlietheminxx · 15-03-2021 3:17pm

I have to go into the office this afternoon for the first time this year and I'm absolutely dreading it. Started to go down an anxiety spiral thinking about being back in full-time. I don't know why it's affecting me so badly, I never really had a problem with it before Covid. I don't want to go back to being away from the house all day and I don't want to be around my coworkers (not that they've done anything wrong). Ugh. It's the one bit of lockdown I'd like to keep, but I don't think my boss will support that.

cloudatlas · 15-03-2021 4:30pm

Is anybody else suffering from gerd acid reflux due to stress/ anxiety. Have ssri's helped you?

tdf7187 · 15-03-2021 7:43pm

cloudatlas wrote: »

Is anybody else suffering from gerd acid reflux due to stress/ anxiety. Have ssri's helped you?

I used to get it and found that Nexium worked wonders. I haven't had any acid reflux since going on a brief course of Nexium a few years' ago. I can't say that SSRI's made any difference one way or the other. There is a theory that SSRI's can help with IBS.

poisonated · 16-03-2021 1:04am

RabbleRouser2k wrote: »

Regarding harassment-yeah, I've gotten a few unwanted pm's that would constitute harassment. If they get really bad, report them. (I've never had to, but those users tend to get banned because of mass harassment).

As for OCD. Those thoughts can be brutal. What helped me, a little, was reading up on the condition. I don't know what kind of OCD you have, whether it's thought based, or compulsion based (or maybe both) but a good book that helped me was 'Tormenting Thoughts, and Secret Rituals' by Ian Osborn. It's not a cure, but it's very helpful in understanding.

My ocd is more thought based as I know that I have to avoid carrying out compulsions because of exposure response prevention technique. I don’t want to go down the rabbit hole or trying to control the thoughts through meaningless compulsions. Thanks for advice on book.

Meeoow · 16-03-2021 10:55pm

I'm in tears here watching Roman Kemp: our silent emergency on bbc1.
Hitting home how common and hidden depression is, even now.

Gremlinertia · 19-03-2021 2:06am

Suffering with me nerves as we would have said at home a few years back.. My app for my mood doesn't make for great stats lately.. Feelings of being let down and weary with things in general and then ruminating on personal stuff. Been trying to pull myself out of the drain a few weeks now. It just crept up on me..

Just needed to type that out, thanks..

YoshiSays · 19-03-2021 2:55pm

If you can get to a green area and out into nature then do it. Managed to get out today after feeling **** all week. Makes the world of difference. If you can, go "off peak" when less people around. Eg take a break from work, early morning.

Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

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