2021 Bride/Groom

Naid23 · 25-10-2020 6:17pm

This may have already been asked and answered in this thread. Has anyone gotten any information regarding minimum numbers payments if they are required to have say 25 ppl by restrictions. Are you still expected to pay the difference?

We have a minimum number of 100 adults for our venue for October next year and trying to decide what to do whether to postpone or just see what happens in the next few months.

Michellenman · 25-10-2020 7:18pm

Our minimum is also 100 per the contract but our venue told us that we’d be charged for whatever the maximum numbers are based any restrictions at the time. So if that’s 50 then the most we are charged for is 50. When we booked we paid an additional fee to have our venue exclusively for the weekend, If the guidelines are 50 or less then we lose the exclusivity so they can have other guests onsite ... which is just a bit of a mad situation.

UnBridled · 26-10-2020 3:49pm

Just to give our experience. We were told by our venue that in the event of number restrictions then our price would reflect this as we'd be paying per head. The hotel had a number of packages but because we wanted a Saturday with 80 guests they created a day for us based on individual costings.

Communication with them from the moment we decided to have our wedding there has been terrible. I told myself that its because they must be so busy with the changing restrictions and dealing with lots of different couples. We received on the 15th of October. Over a month since I gave our address for it to be sent. It had a number of errors in it and also didn't make any provision for what we were told about the numbers. So I put all that in an email. I expect a response in the new year

I am now feeling anxious that we will have to postpone due to Covid. It just isn't the kind of day we want. I would love the bells and whistles of hair and makeup, ceremony music, band, all that jazz. Our other option is moving it to summer time (October is our month) because, well maybe we will be a level 2 then like summer gone by. It's all a guessing game at this stage.

26-10-2020 3:58pm

Have any 2021 brides/grooms chosen to have a back up date on reserve?

XxMCRxBabyxX · 26-10-2020 5:50pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Have any 2021 brides/grooms chosen to have a back up date on reserve?

We haven't but my cousin who had postponed from June '20 to May '21 has now postponed again to May '22.

Have most people been in touch with their venues during the last while? We're due to get married in June and haven't really been in touch with the venue at all and were planning to wait until January before doing so. Should we be in more regular contact though?

26-10-2020 6:32pm

We're Spring 2021, and were last in touch with our venue around August, I think it was. We are meant to touch base with them again around November/December.

UnBridled · 27-10-2020 3:27pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Have any 2021 brides/grooms chosen to have a back up date on reserve?

We haven't one yet but we are waiting until the new year to see how things stand. If we were having a smaller wedding then we would have picked a different venue. One of the places I had my eye on was Butler House in Kilkenny but they had a max of 50. I'm trying not to worry too much now.

Michellenman · 27-10-2020 4:01pm

UnBridled wrote: »

We haven't one yet but we are waiting until the new year to see how things stand. If we were having a smaller wedding then we would have picked a different venue. One of the places I had my eye on was Butler House in Kilkenny but they had a max of 50. I'm trying not to worry too much now.

We are the same. We’ll review in the new year. If we wanted a smaller wedding we wouldn’t have chosen our venue. And there’s certain things we won’t compromise on so it may mean postponing but we aren’t making any decisions just yet.

For my own peace of mind I’ve left that HIGM Facebook group and have unfollowed a lot of stuff on Instagram. Otherwise I find myself just wondering and worrying about it all constantly. It was all getting a bit too much to be honest.

confusticated · 27-10-2020 5:09pm

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

We haven't but my cousin who had postponed from June '20 to May '21 has now postponed again to May '22.

Have most people been in touch with their venues during the last while? We're due to get married in June and haven't really been in touch with the venue at all and were planning to wait until January before doing so. Should we be in more regular contact though?

We're May 2021 and have contacted them once since covid kicked off, in September, to discuss what the options were. They were great and advised waiting til January to think about which way we might go and see how things look after Christmas, so sounds like ye're on the same timeframe there.

BCG89 · 27-10-2020 6:10pm

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

We haven't but my cousin who had postponed from June '20 to May '21 has now postponed again to May '22.

Have most people been in touch with their venues during the last while? We're due to get married in June and haven't really been in touch with the venue at all and were planning to wait until January before doing so. Should we be in more regular contact though?

We are March 2021 and have had a phone call with our venue. They seem really on the ball with all the new restrictions and we both felt really at ease after talking to them! Would definitely recommend getting in touch with your venue even just to run through any changes you ca expect!

NM123 · 28-10-2020 8:42am

Hi all, our wedding is June 2021, I contacted our venue to get a sense of how they are handling minimum numbers etc right now. Our contract is for 80 guests. The venue is an exclusive venue, they only do weddings.
I was informed that a new package has been drawn up for both 25 and 50 guest options. Both have an increase to the price per head, an increase to the Accommodation costs (with certain number of rooms to be taken), and on the 25 guest package, there is also now an added venue hire fee (€3500). (No venue hire fee as part of original contract).
Also, it is mentioned that if we wanted to postpone to 2022/2023, we can do so, booking at 2022/23 price per heads (increase to both package and accommodation rate) and also would have to pay a €2000 “postponement” fee, which would keep the exclusivity of the venue. This postponement fee could be waived, but venue would no longer be exclusive (which I don’t know how this would work).
If guidelines mean we can have 80 guests, we can stick with our original package. But banking on that is risky I feel.
I was really not expecting this kind of response, and at this point it’s too early to call what 2021 will look like. Our next deposit payment will be due in Dec (6mths from wedding). By that point we would have to be ok with the idea of taking the risk of dealing with 25 costs/ postponing fee as it would still be too early to know what status in June would be like. I really just feel this isn’t right and we are being made pay for all the losses incurred during this year. How can these kind of additional fees and restrictions be imposed? Is anyone else dealing with this type of scenario? Thanks

Michellenman · 28-10-2020 2:55pm

NM123 that sounds really unfair of your venue, I’d be so disappointed with such massive changes like that.

NM123 · 28-10-2020 6:07pm

Michellenman wrote: »

NM123 that sounds really unfair of your venue, I’d be so disappointed with such massive changes like that.

Yes, it really took us by surprise. I struggle to understand how they could enforce such fees and limitations. It just doesn't seem like a reasonable approach to take and not sure where we stand now on it. I just wasn't sure if this is now the norm for similar venues, but from what i gather it is not...

28-10-2020 8:16pm

NM123 wrote: »

Yes, it really took us by surprise. I struggle to understand how they could enforce such fees and limitations. It just doesn't seem like a reasonable approach to take and not sure where we stand now on it. I just wasn't sure if this is now the norm for similar venues, but from what i gather it is not...

I read your post this morning and I was so upset for you! I can't see the justification for such outrageous fees, it's not like you just decided to postpone on a whim! It's completely unfair and unreasonable what they are expecting. I would strongly suggest contacting a solicitor and forward the information you have received from your venue regarding fees and contracts, and ask the solicitor for advice on how to proceed.

Samsung20 · 29-10-2020 2:51pm

NM123 wrote: »

Hi all, our wedding is June 2021, I contacted our venue to get a sense of how they are handling minimum numbers etc right now. Our contract is for 80 guests. The venue is an exclusive venue, they only do weddings.
I was informed that a new package has been drawn up for both 25 and 50 guest options. Both have an increase to the price per head, an increase to the Accommodation costs (with certain number of rooms to be taken), and on the 25 guest package, there is also now an added venue hire fee (€3500). (No venue hire fee as part of original contract).
Also, it is mentioned that if we wanted to postpone to 2022/2023, we can do so, booking at 2022/23 price per heads (increase to both package and accommodation rate) and also would have to pay a €2000 “postponement” fee, which would keep the exclusivity of the venue. This postponement fee could be waived, but venue would no longer be exclusive (which I don’t know how this would work).
If guidelines mean we can have 80 guests, we can stick with our original package. But banking on that is risky I feel.
I was really not expecting this kind of response, and at this point it’s too early to call what 2021 will look like. Our next deposit payment will be due in Dec (6mths from wedding). By that point we would have to be ok with the idea of taking the risk of dealing with 25 costs/ postponing fee as it would still be too early to know what status in June would be like. I really just feel this isn’t right and we are being made pay for all the losses incurred during this year. How can these kind of additional fees and restrictions be imposed? Is anyone else dealing with this type of scenario? Thanks

Hi NM123 , I know exactly how you feel, I think we have the same wedding venue, ? I contacted them two weeks ago and was told the very same they now have two new wedding packages for 25 /50 guests and have increased the price per head by a considerable amount. Our wedding was prosponed from this year until next March if level 3 restrictions our still in place by then (25 guests) we have to pay a venue hire fee of 3500? This was never mentioned in our original contract.

On questioning the venue about these price increases I was basically told as they our an exclusive wedding venue, the venue wasn't built to hold such small numbers, and in order for them to continue to operate currently and in the future they have to increase the prices or expect the minimum numbers in original contracts to be paid. Which basically mean they are making couples through no fault of their own foot the bill for the losses they have incurred. I think this is extremely unfair.

I would go ahead next year with only 25 or 50 guests no problem and pay the price in our original contract, but i am not agreeing to these new packages. I Will be getting onto a solicitor to see what my rights are and to see legally can the venue do this, as I feel they are breaking the contract.

cazzer22 · 29-10-2020 3:07pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I read your post this morning and I was so upset for you! I can't see the justification for such outrageous fees, it's not like you just decided to postpone on a whim! It's completely unfair and unreasonable what they are expecting. I would strongly suggest contacting a solicitor and forward the information you have received from your venue regarding fees and contracts, and ask the solicitor for advice on how to proceed.

Very sound advice. It's a complete breach of contract and a solicitor can best advise you on it.

NM123 · 29-10-2020 7:55pm

Samsung20 wrote: »

Hi NM123 , I know exactly how you feel, I think we have the same wedding venue, ? I contacted them two weeks ago and was told the very same they now have two new wedding packages for 25 /50 guests and have increased the price per head by a considerable amount. Our wedding was prosponed from this year until next March if level 3 restrictions our still in place by then (25 guests) we have to pay a venue hire fee of 3500? This was never mentioned in our original contract.

On questioning the venue about these price increases I was basically told as they our an exclusive wedding venue, the venue wasn't built to hold such small numbers, and in order for them to continue to operate currently and in the future they have to increase the prices or expect the minimum numbers in original contracts to be paid. Which basically mean they are making couples through no fault of their own foot the bill for the losses they have incurred. I think this is extremely unfair.

I would go ahead next year with only 25 or 50 guests no problem and pay the price in our original contract, but i am not agreeing to these new packages. I Will be getting onto a solicitor to see what my rights are and to see legally can the venue do this, as I feel they are breaking the contract.

Hi there, yes this sounds the exact same. I can understand that some adjustments may be needed to cover a minimum cost on the very low numbers, but feel these options are extremely unreasonable and morally wrong. We get that a bit of flexibility on either side is needed in these times, but i feel these options are taking complete advantage of the situation. Considering that under these options, the price that would be charged for a wedding of 25 guests would be the same price as 50, can hardly be justified in my opinion

Spanish Eyes · 30-10-2020 6:47pm

In secular countries like France you MUST go to the Mairie, or town hall and get married under civil law. After that you can do whatever you like either religious or quirky for your wedding.

The first bit is the legal bit of course. I like that approach personally.

I suppose same can be done here too, with the religious blessing afterwards if you are inclined.

Michellenman · 30-10-2020 6:55pm

We’ve just provisionally held a date for spring 2022 in case we are not in at least level 1 by April 2021. The relief is unreal!

matrim · 30-10-2020 7:58pm

Spanish Eyes wrote: »

In secular countries like France you MUST go to the Mairie, or town hall and get married under civil law. After that you can do whatever you like either religious or quirky for your wedding.

The first bit is the legal bit of course. I like that approach personally.

I suppose same can be done here too, with the religious blessing afterwards if you are inclined.

TBH I prefer the option here to have the solemniser come to where you are. It's just a pity it is so hard to get in the register outside of a religious organization

UnBridled · 01-11-2020 1:30pm

Anyone who has bought their dresses, are you concerned that they might not suit a Covid restriction wedding?

woodchuck · 01-11-2020 1:37pm

UnBridled wrote: »

Anyone who has bought their dresses, are you concerned that they might not suit a Covid restriction wedding?

How would it not suit? Presumably you still want to look your best on the day regardless. It shouldn't make a difference just because there is a smaller number of guests there to see it.

I'm more worried about Covid weight and not fitting into it anymore :rolleyes:

UnBridled · 01-11-2020 1:51pm

woodchuck wrote: »

How would it not suit? Presumably you still want to look your best on the day regardless. It shouldn't make a difference just because there is a smaller number of guests there to see it.

I'm more worried about Covid weight and not fitting into it anymore :rolleyes:

I was just thinking of standing outside the civil registry office in an elaborate floor length gown. For me certain dress styles suit certain wedding days. I was wondering what others thought.

eviltwin · 01-11-2020 2:12pm

UnBridled wrote: »

I was just thinking of standing outside the civil registry office in an elaborate floor length gown. For me certain dress styles suit certain wedding days. I was wondering what others thought.

Lots of brides wear traditional weddings gowns to civil marriages, doesn’t look odd at all. Why would it?

UnBridled · 01-11-2020 2:22pm

eviltwin wrote: »

Lots of brides wear traditional weddings gowns to civil marriages, doesn’t look odd at all. Why would it?

Ok that's good. I was just wondering is all

cazzer22 · 01-11-2020 3:21pm

UnBridled wrote: »

Ok that's good. I was just wondering is all

You do you and I'm sure you will look beautiful in the dress you chose, regardless of where you're getting married. Have a lovely day and enjoy it all ❤️

cazzer22 · 01-11-2020 3:22pm

woodchuck wrote: »

How would it not suit? Presumably you still want to look your best on the day regardless. It shouldn't make a difference just because there is a smaller number of guests there to see it.

I'm more worried about Covid weight and not fitting into it anymore :rolleyes:

Haha, me too. I'm terrified of not fitting into the dress and it's not a figure hugging one, so I shouldn't, but it's a fairly normal anxiety I would imagine. Good ole pandemic vibes ðŸ¾

UnBridled · 01-11-2020 3:59pm

cazzer22 wrote: »

You do you and I'm sure you will look beautiful in the dress you chose, regardless of where you're getting married. Have a lovely day and enjoy it all ❤️

Thank you

XxMCRxBabyxX · 02-11-2020 4:20pm

So, as if Covid anxiety wasn't enough, I've just found out through my hair stylist's instagram that she's pregnant! I have no idea how far along but am now worried if a new baby will impact whether she'll be available for our wedding in June! It was so hard to find someone when I first went looking that I'm very worried that I'll be doing my own hair if she can't!

woodchuck · 02-11-2020 4:27pm

She might have a backup to cover for her?

Out of interest... how difficult is it to find someone to do hair? My plan all along was to have my brothers girlfriend do my hair (she's professionally trained). They live in Canada though. They've booked their flights for the wedding in May, but obviously I've no idea if they'll actually be able to come. I haven't booked a backup, as I don't want to throw money away on a non-refundable deposit.

We're getting married on a Sunday though, so I'm hoping if I'm stuck, I'll be able to find someone to do my hair closer to the time?

If they're even allowed by then...

Michellenman · 02-11-2020 4:42pm

Sunday might be ok as lots of salons are closed on sundays. There might be stylists available from your regular hairdressers who could do a house call for you on the day?

XxMCRxBabyxX · 02-11-2020 4:55pm

woodchuck wrote: »

She might have a backup to cover for her?

Out of interest... how difficult is it to find someone to do hair? My plan all along was to have my brothers girlfriend do my hair (she's professionally trained). They live in Canada though. They've booked their flights for the wedding in May, but obviously I've no idea if they'll actually be able to come. I haven't booked a backup, as I don't want to throw money away on a non-refundable deposit.

We're getting married on a Sunday though, so I'm hoping if I'm stuck, I'll be able to find someone to do my hair closer to the time? If they're even allowed by then...

I haven't heard from her either way so am just hoping she has a plan!

Honestly, I had a nightmare finding someone nearly 18 months in advance but we're on a bank holiday Saturday so probably one of the more in demand dates. I'd agree with Michellenman and consider asking your own salon. I had my own hair dresser on reserve at one point but she lives the other side of the country from our venue.

woodchuck · 02-11-2020 4:57pm

Michellenman wrote: »

Sunday might be ok as lots of salons are closed on sundays. There might be stylists available from your regular hairdressers who could do a house call for you on the day?

Yeah I'm hoping that'll be the case. I actually don't have a regular hairdresser atm though... just moved house

I'm hoping I can get somebody if I'm stuck though.

I know there are more important things in the Covid-world, but it makes planning a wedding an absolute nightmare. Things that I had struck off my list before are complete unknowns now. My hair is just one example. The hotel we were planning to stay in for our wedding night is closed atm and can't get in touch with them to find out if/when they'll be reopening (we're getting married at a restaurant it was an ordeal to find somewhere that didn't mind me checking in wearing a wedding dress). We'll only be able to do a menu tasting with our venue if we get back down to level 3. I think it'll need to be level 3 to have dress alterations done too and normally it's done very close to the time. I'm afraid to even touch base with my MUA because she has a minimum call out of 4 people, which was fine before, but may not be anymore (honestly, my own sister can't tell me if she'll come to our wedding). Sorry, end rant...

Michellenman · 02-11-2020 5:06pm

I feel the exact same woodchuck. I know that covid is so so serious and I’m very aware that in the grand scheme of covid weddings are frivolous affairs but it’s really sucked all the fun out of it. If things are at level 3 then no hen or stag (even at home!) no menu tasting, no hair or make up trials, no casual day after, no honeymoon. And the things that can go ahead will be really impacted. Shopping for a wedding dress in a mask was actually quite difficult, the alterations will be same probably.

I’ve spent the morning trying to arrange back up vendors for if we have to postpone and it’s so hard and we are probably going to have to just suck up losing some 2021 deposits or paying deposits for a 2022 date and then not having to use them and potentially losing those deposits.

In good news, my wedding band arrived today and it’s beautiful. I had a firm idea of what i wanted but it was very expensive. I bought a ring at auction that had all the stones I needed but in the wrong setting. I got Greenes Jewellers on Angier st to reset the stones in to the ring that I wanted and it is really really beautiful. It’s absolutely perfect and it cost about 30% of what I was quoted for buying it new

XxMCRxBabyxX · 02-11-2020 5:14pm

I'm feeling exactly the same as well. It's the lack of certainty and having no idea of what we will and won't be able to do. I suffer from anxiety at the best of times and this is not helping it one bit. I'm trying to continue planning as normal but it all feels a bit pointless when I have no idea what my wedding will look like it or if it will even be able to go ahead.

Congrats on the ring Michellenman!

Lollipops23 · 02-11-2020 5:19pm

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

I'm feeling exactly the same as well. It's the lack of certainty and having no idea of what we will and won't be able to do. I suffer from anxiety at the best of times and this is not helping it one bit. I'm trying to continue planning as normal but it all feels a bit pointless when I have no idea what my wedding will look like it or if it will even be able to go ahead.

I'm the very same. At first we forged ahead and planned/booked everything. Right about now we should be ironing out some of the finer, more fun details but it's all so, so up in the air.

Faith · 02-11-2020 8:37pm

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

So, as if Covid anxiety wasn't enough, I've just found out through my hair stylist's instagram that she's pregnant! I have no idea how far along but am now worried if a new baby will impact whether she'll be available for our wedding in June! It was so hard to find someone when I first went looking that I'm very worried that I'll be doing my own hair if she can't!

When I was getting married, my mum tried to book a makeup trial with my MUA a few months before the wedding and found out then my MUA was pregnant. I freaked out and sent a panicked email to the MUA, who assured me she would be back in action by my wedding. She was too, even though she was only about 6 weeks postpartum from what I remember.

I remember how anxious I was though, and had a lot of feelings around how i thought the mua should have told me about her pregnancy just in case. My husband entirely disagreed and thought I was massively over-reacting. In retrospect, he was right but it’s still a very anxiety-provoking situation!

XxMCRxBabyxX · 02-11-2020 9:05pm

I know I'm probably worrying unnecessarily. I think it's just a case of yet another thing to be anxious about!

Neyite · 03-11-2020 5:58pm

I've yet to book hair and makeup but I'd manage on my own if I had to. I want to book a photographer so I might drop the one I had decided on a line to see if he's available for the new date.

Dress-wise, it will need alterations so I'm thinking that I'll also book in that.

I lost all motivation though, probably due to the uncertainty of any potential plans.

woodchuck · 03-11-2020 6:43pm

I'm not a girly girl at all, so wouldn't have a clue where to even start with my hair and makeup

If I was someone who did their own hair/makeup regularly on nights out etc I mightn't mind too much, but I know I'd just make a balls of it cause I have zero experience.

I'm worried about dress alterations too. I had to collect my dress from the bridal shop because they have no room to store all the dresses now due to so many postponements. They gave me the name of the alternation place they use. I was in touch with them a month or two ago just to flag that I'd need alterations next year, but have no appointments booked. I assume these appointments can't go ahead in level 4 or 5 though? But usually alterations are done over a few appointments starting about a month before the wedding to make sure it's a good fit. So it's not like it's something I can just check off my list in December when we'll hopefully go down to level 3, because what if I gain/lose weight then before the wedding in May

Neyite · 03-11-2020 7:08pm

That's the issue with the dress for me as well. In June when we were deciding whether to go ahead with just us and witnesses, or postpone a year, one factor for me was the dress - that sounds vain but really it was down to not wanting to have wasted money on what's literally one of the most expensive items of clothing I've ever bought by not being able to wear it.

Though I do a bit of sewing, there's no way I have the skill to disassemble a bridal gown, correctly fit it to my own shape, and resew it together.

woodchuck · 17-11-2020 3:57pm

This may be of interest to anyone who still needs to buy their wedding shoes...

Rainbow Club have their Black Friday Sale on their website. 85% off selected lines. Unfortunately the pair I wanted weren't included, but it's still 20% off full price lines with the code BF2020. I've been humming and hawing over buying shoes online, but have heard great things about Rainbow Club, so figured it was worth a shot at 20% off!

https://www.rainbowclub.co.uk/

yourdeadwright · 20-11-2020 12:11pm

We have had our ceremony booked for a year now for next September and where basically hours away from paying and booking our venue in March before Covid shut down the country ,

We had cold feet since and decided to hold off booking anything but in the last week decided we are just going to go ahead and try get everything booked up for next September,

Are we mad at this late stage trying to a venue and venders booked for next September ?

Do you reckon new should book for the number we want 110-120 or go and look at a place that would suit better for 50 seen as that is the number with current restrictions ?

What do you guys think ?

woodchuck · 20-11-2020 12:23pm

I don't think you're mad trying to get everything sorted for September. Our original timeline was similar and it's definitely doable, but I was tearing my hair out from the stress of it all tbh (and that was before Covid!!).

However my own personal advice would be to push it out a bit, even by a few months, for your own sanity. Planning will be more difficult while we're still flip flopping in and out of restrictions. So you might just want to give yourself a little extra leeway. It's also much more likely that things will getting back to normal the longer you leave it.

The stress of trying to plan/postpone/plan a wedding during Covid has been unreal. Save yourself the hassle if you're not under time pressure. Honestly, it's nearly impossible to plan anything because the restrictions just keep changing. Will you be able to have live music? Dancing? Candy carts (if that's your thing)? Can you get your hair and makeup done? Will you have to finish up by 11.30pm? Will you have to wear masks during the ceremony? How many guests can you invite? How many guests per table? These are all major concerns until things go back to normal.

We're due to get married in May and I'm very seriously considering postponing again. The OH wants to get married in May regardless though. I'm not sure what we're going to do tbh. All I know right now is that I'm hangry as fcuk atm because I'm concerned about fitting into the wedding dress I bought pre-Covid :mad: Sorry, rant over.

Neyite · 20-11-2020 12:23pm

We were always going to have a relatively small wedding anyway so it's made current decisions a bit easier. So there were a lot of things we weren't doing - bridal party, band, florist etc so a lot less deposits.

We've decided we'll go along with our original plan and if we need to just do it with us and two witness when the time comes, so be it. Any things that need a deposit we'll work off the assumption that we may lose the deposit.

Not ideal, but what can you do?

yourdeadwright · 20-11-2020 12:50pm

Neyite wrote: »

We were always going to have a relatively small wedding anyway so it's made current decisions a bit easier. So there were a lot of things we weren't doing - bridal party, band, florist etc so a lot less deposits.

We've decided we'll go along with our original plan and if we need to just do it with us and two witness when the time comes, so be it. Any things that need a deposit we'll work off the assumption that we may lose the deposit.

Not ideal, but what can you do?

The ceremony is the big thing for us we are currently undecided on a wedding for 110 or wit the idea of having family and a friend each so like 20 people

yourdeadwright · 20-11-2020 12:54pm

woodchuck wrote: »

I don't think you're mad trying to get everything sorted for September. Our original timeline was similar and it's definitely doable, but I was tearing my hair out from the stress of it all tbh (and that was before Covid!!).

However my own personal advice would be to push it out a bit, even by a few months, for your own sanity. Planning will be more difficult while we're still flip flopping in and out of restrictions. So you might just want to give yourself a little extra leeway. It's also much more likely that things will getting back to normal the longer you leave it.

The stress of trying to plan/postpone/plan a wedding during Covid has been unreal. Save yourself the hassle if you're not under time pressure. Honestly, it's nearly impossible to plan anything because the restrictions just keep changing. Will you be able to have live music? Dancing? Candy carts (if that's your thing)? Can you get your hair and makeup done? Will you have to finish up by 11.30pm? Will you have to wear masks during the ceremony? How many guests can you invite? How many guests per table? These are all major concerns until things go back to normal.

We're due to get married in May and I'm very seriously considering postponing again. The OH wants to get married in May regardless though. I'm not sure what we're going to do tbh. All I know right now is that I'm hangry as fcuk atm because I'm concerned about fitting into the wedding dress I bought pre-Covid :mad: Sorry, rant over.

How many have you planned for in may 50 or for a bigger wedding ?

110/120 would be ideal for us but if we have to 50 we would prefer to go smaller to 15-20 and just do a very fancy dinner after the ceremony and forget about the party part,

Neyite · 20-11-2020 1:05pm

yourdeadwright wrote: »

The ceremony is the big thing for us we are currently undecided on a wedding for 110 or wit the idea of having family and a friend each so like 20 people

It's a personal preference but I think planning anything more than a friends+family type of wedding right now has to be more stressful than anything. Weddings were already quite stressful to arrange, and Covid has just amplified all that to an astonishing degree. Literally rules can change the night before the wedding. I'd be a wreck!

We've said that if we do have to do a "wartime" wedding with just us, witnesses and a priest, we'll still hold a blessing and reception on our anniversary when covid is firmly in the rear view mirror. Would something like that be an option for you?

Nugget89 · 20-11-2020 1:46pm

How are people getting on looking for bands at the moment? I find it hard to judge bands without seeing some sort of live showcase, which is making me delay any decision.

woodchuck · 20-11-2020 1:48pm

yourdeadwright wrote: »

How many have you planned for in may 50 or for a bigger wedding ?

110/120 would be ideal for us but if we have to 50 we would prefer to go smaller to 15-20 and just do a very fancy dinner after the ceremony and forget about the party part,

50 would be ideal for us. That was the number I had in my head even before Covid tbh! We could probably manage with 25, but it would be awkward (e.g. if we both want to invite a few friends, we might have to not invite their partners

).

I'm very worried about the safety end of it though. If one person has it, it WILL spread at a wedding (I mean a full day including a meal and dancing etc, not just a ceremony). I'm not sure I'd be able to relax at all. Even if the day itself is as "amazing" as everyone says (:rolleyes:), I'd be worried for 2 weeks afterwards in case anyone develops symptoms. I'm not sure I could handle the guilt if someone actually got ill because of my wedding.

My parents are very very concerned about the virus. I honestly don't know if they'll even come to the wedding while there's still a pandemic. Maybe they'd come to the ceremony, but I can't see them staying for a drinks reception, meal etc. My sister absolutely will not come until an effective vaccine has been rolled out. My brother is the only family member who's keen to come, but he lives in Canada, so who knows what will be feasible.

If it looks like none of my immediate family will come in May, I think we'll have to postpone again. I'm not sure when we need to make that call though. I might start enquiring with our suppliers about a backup date

2021 Bride/Groom

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