I am new to this country and want to know why everyone is so rude.

Xertz · 22-01-2020 12:20am

Wompa1 wrote: »

It's great! In Galway the city switched from hourly charges at most of the public car parks to a flat charge of 5 euro. So if you only need to park for an hour, it's 5 euro. All day? 5 euro...

If you go there in the afternoon and park up, inevitably someone will run over to your car and give you their parking pass.

People's soundness is killing the city council's revenue &#55357;&#56832;

You get that in Cork and Dublin too all the time with parking discs that haven't expired yet.

Xertz · 22-01-2020 12:22am

The weirdest one I've had (three times so far) in Ireland is someone having a good old chat with me having dialled or texted the wrong number. It's happened both on the landline and the mobile.

Fairly bizarre but wasn't actually like they were trying to stalk me (I hope anyway).

tuxy · 22-01-2020 12:25am

Mervyn Skidmore wrote: »

Maybe OP is having some sort of culture shock even though he refuses to let us know where he's from, how rude of him.

Also homesickness can be very difficult to deal with and you won't be in any position to make friends when suffering from it.

Enter name here · 22-01-2020 12:26am

Absolutely correct OP. The Irish are some of the rudest, racist and most unprofessional people I have ever met.

The Irish thrive on corruption, consider themselves above others and what is completely astounding is how well educated the Irish consider themselves when nothing could be further from the truth.

The Irish thrive on handouts and and believe everyone owes them a living and a free house next to their mam.

With a bit of luck and an ever increasing rental and housing market there shouldn't be many Irish left living in Dublin soon and us foreigners can get about having a good time again.

dontpanic · 22-01-2020 12:30am

Enter name here wrote: »

Absolutely correct OP. The Irish are some of the rudest, racist and most unprofessional people I have ever met.

The Irish thrive on corruption, consider themselves above others and what is completely astounding is how well educated the Irish consider themselves when nothing could be further from the truth.

The Irish thrive on handouts and and believe everyone owes them a living and a free house next to their mam.

With a bit of luck and an ever increasing rental and housing market there shouldn't be many Irish left living in Dublin soon and us foreigners can get about having a good time again.

Are you being forced to stay here? Why live in a place you loathe? Help me understand

ayzeb123 · 22-01-2020 12:31am

Hi New to Ireland

Sorry you're struggling to settle in here. I'm Irish and I've lived in different European countries for long periods and always settled in well and made friends easily. However when I started dating a man (whom i later married) i found it harder to feel accepted and to fit in. I found the more i made an effort the more awkward i felt. I'm pretty easy going and would talk to anyone, I wanted to fit it and join in but i felt like i didn't, this wasn't because people were horrible to me but was due to cultural differences and the fact that i missed Ireland & our ways. Like you i started to find fault in lots of everyday things i experienced there, albeit small silly things but they would really get under my skin. I think I was homesick for the first time.

My husband moved to Ireland with me and we made our life here. He loved Ireland when we came on holidays but living here was a different story. He also struggled with many of our ways. And honestly, the Ireland i missed so much and was homesick for was not the place i remembered. We caught the tail end of the Celtic Tiger and i couldn't get over how changed the Irish people were. Ireland became very Cosmopolitan, the humble people were no more, replaced with overconfident sometimes cocky people, there was lots of money, everyone had new cars and were building bigger houses than the neighbours. We had supermarket snobs(seriously:) your car couldn't be seen at LIDL or ALdi or people felt sorry for you (back then).

After a few months, when the novelty wore off, My husband also got very down/depressed for a while with little things that bugged him. Some things still irk him but they are the things that annoy everyone. We are here 18 years now and very happy and wouldn't go back even though i really love going back to his country and family & friends for holidays.

I suppose my point is, you made a big decision to move to Ireland, you're only here 6 months so are still in a transitional stage. It seems that you may be Homesick and just miss what you are used to. Irish people are generally friendly, polite and love a chat. You just need to give yourself time to settle in and don't try too hard with people, it'll happen naturally when you feel better yourself and are content with your decision to move here. Think of yourself and do things you and your wife enjoy.

Only you are in control of your thoughts. The mind is a powerful thing. I hope you settle in and meet some genuine Irish people.

Good Luck.:)

Manach · 22-01-2020 12:35am

MOD Note: This discussion is now verging on troll teratory. Should this continue, the thread will be locked/users will be carded.

ldy4mxonucwsq6 · 22-01-2020 12:38am

Enter name here wrote: »

Absolutely correct OP. The Irish are some of the rudest, racist and most unprofessional people I have ever met.

The Irish thrive on corruption, consider themselves above others and what is completely astounding is how well educated the Irish consider themselves when nothing could be further from the truth.

The Irish thrive on handouts and and believe everyone owes them a living and a free house next to their mam.

With a bit of luck and an ever increasing rental and housing market there shouldn't be many Irish left living in Dublin soon and us foreigners can get about having a good time again.

But you're not a 'foreigner' as you put it, you are Irish are you not so do you include yourself in the above?

Why would you live somewhere where you are clearly unhappy?

dd973 · 22-01-2020 12:41am

A lot of the famed friendliness OP is just the gushy verbal diarrhea that makes us look friendly compared to the English, (the English stereotype that is that's based on Londoners and the Posho's), people in the North West of England where I currently live are miles friendlier than the Irish.

The Irish are incredible snobs as well, instant judgement without empirical knowledge or interaction, I lost count of the amount of times I was a 'Knacker' or a 'Queer' according to some random Colin Hunt who knew Jack S**t about me.

Going back home in a few days for a visit, still love the place, the place trumps the people though.

beauf · 22-01-2020 12:57am

We have this thread saying Irish are not friendly another thread somewhere else saying Irish are too invasive of people's privacy.

punisher5112 · 22-01-2020 12:58am

Enter name here wrote: »

Absolutely correct OP. The Irish are some of the rudest, racist and most unprofessional people I have ever met.

The Irish thrive on corruption, consider themselves above others and what is completely astounding is how well educated the Irish consider themselves when nothing could be further from the truth.

The Irish thrive on handouts and and believe everyone owes them a living and a free house next to their mam.

With a bit of luck and an ever increasing rental and housing market there shouldn't be many Irish left living in Dublin soon and us foreigners can get about having a good time again.

Hilarious

punisher5112 · 22-01-2020 12:59am

Most racist people I've ever come across are black people but hey that can't be true isn't it as we are told only white are racist I suppose that's where the travellers got that out of too as we are racist to them too....

punisher5112 · 22-01-2020 1:00am

beauf wrote: »

We have this thread saying Irish are not friendly another thread somewhere else saying Irish are too invasive of people's privacy.

I find the Indian window scammers the worst....

Kristopherus · 22-01-2020 1:13am

Manach wrote: »

MOD Note: This discussion is now verging on troll teratory. Should this continue, the thread will be locked/users will be carded.

I agree with you, but you should, at this stage, know how to spell.

The Orb · 22-01-2020 7:09am

OP, if you won't tell us where you come from then nothing you say has any validity whatsoever. A comparison could be useful. You are deliberately withholding your own identity which leads me to believe you are a troll.

maninasia · 22-01-2020 7:12am

.red. wrote: »

One of my pet peeves is snooty people who call themselves "middle class"
Maybe it's not the Irish, maybe it's you?

It's snooty calling yourself middle class ...That's hilarious.

Lyan · 22-01-2020 7:13am

We aren't rude, we just don't like you.

maninasia · 22-01-2020 7:14am

Duke of Url wrote: »

It was a genuine answer. If you don’t like where you are why stay?

Do you think everyone should conform to the happy go lucky Irish stereotype?

That's not an answer, why don't you leave this thread and shut the door after you if you don't like the question ?
..

Oh you don't like that kind of answer either do you ? ðŸ˜

maninasia · 22-01-2020 7:19am

New to Ireland wrote: »

Very accurate I think, thanks

I've been told by a couple of returned emigrants that it's important to keep your mouth shut, Irish people just don't like to hear any kind of criticism even if it is fair, and you will find yourself ostracised quickly.

Dublin seems quite stressful these days and a 'big city', I could imagine people have less time than before for each other.

tuxy · 22-01-2020 7:21am

maninasia wrote: »

Dublin seems quite stressful these days and a 'big city', I could imagine people have less time than before for each other.

Well city life is not for everyone, especially with big cities but the OP has an issue with the country as a whole not just Dublin.
For all we know they could live in the mighty Ahascragh!

maninasia · 22-01-2020 7:22am

ayzeb123 wrote: »

Hi New to Ireland

Sorry you're struggling to settle in here. I'm Irish and I've lived in different European countries for long periods and always settled in well and made friends easily. However when I started dating a man (whom i later married) i found it harder to feel accepted and to fit in. I found the more i made an effort the more awkward i felt. I'm pretty easy going and would talk to anyone, I wanted to fit it and join in but i felt like i didn't, this wasn't because people were horrible to me but was due to cultural differences and the fact that i missed Ireland & our ways. Like you i started to find fault in lots of everyday things i experienced there, albeit small silly things but they would really get under my skin. I think I was homesick for the first time.

My husband moved to Ireland with me and we made our life here. He loved Ireland when we came on holidays but living here was a different story. He also struggled with many of our ways. And honestly, the Ireland i missed so much and was homesick for was not the place i remembered. We caught the tail end of the Celtic Tiger and i couldn't get over how changed the Irish people were. Ireland became very Cosmopolitan, the humble people were no more, replaced with overconfident sometimes cocky people, there was lots of money, everyone had new cars and were building bigger houses than the neighbours. We had supermarket snobs(seriously:) your car couldn't be seen at LIDL or ALdi or people felt sorry for you (back then).

After a few months, when the novelty wore off, My husband also got very down/depressed for a while with little things that bugged him. Some things still irk him but they are the things that annoy everyone. We are here 18 years now and very happy and wouldn't go back even though i really love going back to his country and family & friends for holidays.

I suppose my point is, you made a big decision to move to Ireland, you're only here 6 months so are still in a transitional stage. It seems that you may be Homesick and just miss what you are used to. Irish people are generally friendly, polite and love a chat. You just need to give yourself time to settle in and don't try too hard with people, it'll happen naturally when you feel better yourself and are content with your decision to move here. Think of yourself and do things you and your wife enjoy.

Only you are in control of your thoughts. The mind is a powerful thing. I hope you settle in and meet some genuine Irish people.

Good Luck.:)

Nice post.
Culture shock is a powerful thing. It goes in waves.
Returning emigrants can also experience a powerful culture shock.

If folks haven't experienced it then they should read about it.

New to Ireland · 22-01-2020 8:43am

worded wrote: »

Arriving in Ireland is like adjusting to a new job and has three main phases ...

Spring lamb phase ...Everything new

Apathy ... Discontent slowly arriving

Madness .... My advise is don’t fight it, embrace it. Welcome to the asylum OP

Classic, thanks made me laugh (on the inside of course).

New to Ireland · 22-01-2020 8:51am

looksee wrote: »

The OP is obviously a native speaker of English and North American would seem to be the most likely so I agree with the others about the whole culture shock of finding that not everyone will hope that you 'have a nice day' at every opportunity.

Either that or its someone we may have met before (no idea) who is on a bit of a wind-up.

However this is Humanities so there should be a bit more of a ... what? Academic? approach to this question. First OP you are asking us to agree with you that 'all Irish people are rude'. Just on the general law of averages not everyone in the country is rude. In fact the vast majority are not, quite the reverse. Especially if you happen to have an accent that could be construed as Tourist $$!!

Have you considered that maybe your approach may be considered rude? The Irish approach to conversation, even with officialdom, is to phrase your question in a roundabout sort of way, kind of approach the topic from the side rather than head-on. So you don't say 'what time is the train to Wherever' you smile and say 'I wonder would you happen to know what time etc' or 'could you help me please, I need to get the train to X, what time would that be, do you know? Ok I am laying it on a bit thick, but the general idea is there. If you are used to snapping demands then you might expect to get snappy replies.

I came to Ireland some half a century ago, and I will admit that it took me just about 5 years to fully realise that just because we were all speaking English it didn't mean we were all speaking the same language. Life got a lot easier after that.

This is great thank you, I will try and observe this round-about way of talking and think I have noticed this already, it is very hard though, in saying this, to actually surrender to it and adjust culturally as we have been speaking about, for me manners and conversation are a very clear thing which is not in line with the typical Irish way at all. I know I have to adjust and this takes time.

tuxy · 22-01-2020 8:57am

New to Ireland wrote: »

for me manners and conversation are a very clear thing which is not in line with the typical Irish way at all. I know I have to adjust and this takes time.

Manners are very different for different cultures, it does not mean one is better than the other. Different rules for manners does not mean no manners.
I know you are probably not from North America, some people just made that jump but all the smiling and constantly saying have a nice day would be consider superficial and fake in Ireland.
On the other side the constant use of please and thank you used in Ireland would be considered pointless in many European countries.
Who know what is considered manners in the parts of China where it's acceptable to spit on the street but they will still have other rules that are not common in the western world.

Also your experience will be different depending on if you are in urban or rural Ireland.

New to Ireland · 22-01-2020 9:05am

Wompa1 wrote: »

My wife moved here with me in June. She thinks the opposite. She thinks people are very friendly and genuine.

Are you in Dublin? Or the proper Ireland? :pac:

Sorry, I see others made the Dublin part. I don't think it's because people in Dublin are a-holes. Some of the nicest people in my life are born and raised in Dublin. It's just that it's a large city and things move faster there. New York, London, Paris, Berlin etc. all have reputations for cold, rude people...it's just the rat race in a city.

My wife is from the US. She doesn't find people rude...

Ok, I read through more of the replies about things like immigration services. My guess is the OP is American. There's a very different pace to life in Ireland. If you don't get something right away or if someone doesn't answer the phone, it's not them being rude. As others have pointed out, when you walk into a shop or even go through a drive thru, no one's going to give you the over the top "IT'S A WONDERFUL DAY AT CHICK FIL A my name is Abraham, what can I get started for ya!?" Ireland hasn't been a service based industry for a long time. You're also in the midlands which is certainly not a haven for tourists.

I suggest you spend some time in Galway. See if you notice a difference. Maybe that would be a good compromise for you and your wife. The only thing though, don't expect speedy service or the over the top stuff anywhere but the quality of service is a bit better there than in the midlands and you'll be more likely to have the chat with people than in Dublin.

Also, a word of note. We don't treat people who work in retail or the service industry as lower stock like they do in the states. If you are asking for help or need something be courteous. Don't just say "Hey, where's the toothpaste!?"

Again it is incredible to me how people are having a positive experience, at all anywhere in the service industry. I have tried different approaches and I myself have worked in the service industry before as well but this country (well my limited experience of it so far) is by far the worst I have ever experienced, especially when I am smiley and nice and try and engage in any kind of formality which again lends to my point of Irish hating serving, talking, and manners and basically give me the impression that they hate life, hate their jobs and the job should be with someone else who wants and needs these jobs in this economy. People are in need of jobs why are these current service people allowed to continue in their jobs? Again, this is part of the bigger problem I am trying to address, no accountability here, try complaining here, the Irish people who are flat out rude to you will be in shock (even though they are completely comfortable to treat everyone like ****), their managers don't actually action anything as they themselves are whatever and then higher government bodies for complaining simply don't exist or care. And so the industry runs rife. It is extremely frustrating and I genuinely think to myself how does anything actually get done here. Furthermore, you might think I, or anyone else, is rude for having manners and having a normal, direct (to me) conversation with manners, but the whole point is here - everyone - is that to me it is rude when someone talks a hundred miles and hour and doesn't let you talk, talks in a way that is empty and meaningless and is basically racist, rude, close-mindedness blah and still this is what I am expected to engage in and adjust to? What if I want a real conversation? About real things, and want to show feelings and emotions, instead of throw my friend and anyone around me under the bus for social approval.

tuxy · 22-01-2020 9:09am

Do you know which county you perceive to have the main problem with manners?
For example is Mayo worse than Waterford?

super_furry · 22-01-2020 9:11am

As Raylan Givens says; “If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you're the asshole.”

elefant · 22-01-2020 9:12am

Having lived in mainland Europe for the guts of a decade now, I'm shocked that someone would have negative feelings about the Irish service industry.

Whenever I return home I find it an absolute breath of fresh air to experience the genuineness around friendly interactions in pubs, cafes, restaurants, shops etc.

It's honestly the last thing I'd expect someone to be critical of Ireland about. In the same way that I'd be shocked if someone complained that Japan was filthy dirty.

New to Ireland · 22-01-2020 9:13am

Enter name here wrote: »

Absolutely correct OP. The Irish are some of the rudest, racist and most unprofessional people I have ever met.

The Irish thrive on corruption, consider themselves above others and what is completely astounding is how well educated the Irish consider themselves when nothing could be further from the truth.

The Irish thrive on handouts and and believe everyone owes them a living and a free house next to their mam.

With a bit of luck and an ever increasing rental and housing market there shouldn't be many Irish left living in Dublin soon and us foreigners can get about having a good time again.

Wow one way to put it! Not sure what everyone is getting so upset about on here statements like this should be 'normal' to Irish who consider this kind of wind up good humor and banter.

New to Ireland · 22-01-2020 9:14am

ayzeb123 wrote: »

Hi New to Ireland

Sorry you're struggling to settle in here. I'm Irish and I've lived in different European countries for long periods and always settled in well and made friends easily. However when I started dating a man (whom i later married) i found it harder to feel accepted and to fit in. I found the more i made an effort the more awkward i felt. I'm pretty easy going and would talk to anyone, I wanted to fit it and join in but i felt like i didn't, this wasn't because people were horrible to me but was due to cultural differences and the fact that i missed Ireland & our ways. Like you i started to find fault in lots of everyday things i experienced there, albeit small silly things but they would really get under my skin. I think I was homesick for the first time.

My husband moved to Ireland with me and we made our life here. He loved Ireland when we came on holidays but living here was a different story. He also struggled with many of our ways. And honestly, the Ireland i missed so much and was homesick for was not the place i remembered. We caught the tail end of the Celtic Tiger and i couldn't get over how changed the Irish people were. Ireland became very Cosmopolitan, the humble people were no more, replaced with overconfident sometimes cocky people, there was lots of money, everyone had new cars and were building bigger houses than the neighbours. We had supermarket snobs(seriously:) your car couldn't be seen at LIDL or ALdi or people felt sorry for you (back then).

After a few months, when the novelty wore off, My husband also got very down/depressed for a while with little things that bugged him. Some things still irk him but they are the things that annoy everyone. We are here 18 years now and very happy and wouldn't go back even though i really love going back to his country and family & friends for holidays.

I suppose my point is, you made a big decision to move to Ireland, you're only here 6 months so are still in a transitional stage. It seems that you may be Homesick and just miss what you are used to. Irish people are generally friendly, polite and love a chat. You just need to give yourself time to settle in and don't try too hard with people, it'll happen naturally when you feel better yourself and are content with your decision to move here. Think of yourself and do things you and your wife enjoy.

Only you are in control of your thoughts. The mind is a powerful thing. I hope you settle in and meet some genuine Irish people.

Good Luck.:)

Thank you

I am new to this country and want to know why everyone is so rude.

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