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Sisters wanting sites

13567…18

Comments

  • #62
    shenanagans
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 896 ✭✭✭shenanagans


    highspeed wrote: »
    Are the 2 sisters planning on living on these sites or is there a big possibility that they will sell the sites?

    I have 2 sisters who both got sites when farm was transferred to me. Both are now married to farmers and as they did not need the sites for themselves, the sites were transferred back to me. This was agreed between my sisters & parents when they transferred. My brother got a site and had built on it and is happily married there.

    That's a good idea. If they don't use the sites, give them back.


  • #63
    shenanagans
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 896 ✭✭✭shenanagans


    littelady wrote: »
    2 other sisters got deposits for houses in the town. The three remaining sisters want to live on the sites. They never worked on the farm.

    You have 5 sisters in law.... The poor thing.


  • #64
    PoorFarmer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 703 ✭✭✭PoorFarmer


    I took over the farm at home which is a hell of alot smaller than 200 acres. 3 brothers that live local got 3 of the 4 possible sites on the farm and they were more than welcome to them. Always someone around if am caught to move a few cattle or need a lift with something. I actually ended up buying a farm next door and building there so not even living on the original farm. The way I looked at it was the land wasn't mine until it was signed over to me. Why should I be the one who decides who gets what when it was my parents that built up the farm?
    I think your husband needs to think clearly about what the bigger picture is. A few acres out of 200 is pretty minor for the sake of his parents and possibly his sisters happiness.
    If it's like the vast majority of farms around here he could probably pull back those few acres just by cutting back the bushes and tidying up any waste corners around the place.


  • #65
    goat2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,939 ✭✭✭goat2


    littelady wrote: »
    My hubby is in the process of taking over the family farm. Now three of his sisters are looking for sites with intent to start building as soon as possible. My hubby is raging to the point he doesn't want to talk about it. How would you feel.

    Are you inheriting it, getting it for nothing,
    I think it is only right that they get sites, it is hard to get on the house market, this is the only way to go, if one could get a site.
    it was their home place also,


  • #66
    J.O. Farmer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,578 ✭✭✭J.O. Farmer


    littelady wrote: »
    It's also a case of the sisters and their partners can object to my husband should he expand the farm. Ie more traffic on the road, working late In the fields behind them etc.

    Nobody can object to you expanding the farm in the sense of stopping you. They can bid against you if land comes up for sale.

    If it's about sheds or that they can probably object while living on the other side of country.

    It would appear to be an underlying family dispute and not wanting to live in close proximity to his sisters rather than the value of the land. That in a way is more understandable.


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  • #67
    ConnyMcDavid
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 229 ✭✭ConnyMcDavid


    Why are the sisters only making this request now? Why not before it was handed over?


  • #68
    kurtainsider
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 324 ✭✭kurtainsider


    Look at it this way for a moment:

    Would your husband be happier his parents gave the farm lock stock and barrel to one of the sisters?
    Would he be "raging" if this sister begrudged him a site?

    It's the very same thing unless you think that having a penis makes a difference.


  • #69
    The J Stands for Jay
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,900 ✭✭✭The J Stands for Jay


    Eric Cartman wrote: »
    Now not making assumptions in this case , but usually the son would have worked the farm all his life while the daughters went off to college / pursued careers outside the farm, its a mix of tradition and probably sexism on behalf of the parents not involving the daughters in the family farm, not too fair but were it the case that I was the sibling who stayed at home and tended the farm all my life , siblings who had never done a tap demanding land would piss me off.

    Assuming the son worked the farm for 20 years before getting it, each sister would need to have worked on the form for 36 days to have an equal claim to an acre of the farm. I'd say they've done that much easily.


  • #70
    Pussyhands
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,239 ✭✭✭Pussyhands


    rovertom wrote: »
    Well if he is taking over the farm without paying for it, he is inheriting far in excess of what the sisters are looking for I'd imagine.

    And there's probably a reason for that in that he's done a lot of work over the years for it!


  • #71
    littelady
    Closed Accounts Posts: 340 ✭✭littelady


    ConnyMcDavid wrote: »
    Why are the sisters only making this request now? Why not before it was handed over?

    I guess they were having a conversation between them and decided to get sites before its too late.


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  • #72
    littelady
    Closed Accounts Posts: 340 ✭✭littelady


    Pussyhands wrote: »
    And there's probably a reason for that in that he's done a lot of work over the years for it!

    He has worked very hard even Christmas day.


  • #73
    littelady
    Closed Accounts Posts: 340 ✭✭littelady


    Can I ask the farmers here if you would be pissed off too?


  • #74
    Eric Cartman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,280 ✭✭✭✭Eric Cartman


    McGaggs wrote: »
    Assuming the son worked the farm for 20 years before getting it, each sister would need to have worked on the form for 36 days to have an equal claim to an acre of the farm. I'd say they've done that much easily.

    perhaps, but assuming the father dies first, who will look after the mother, surely she won't be leaving the farm house to go live in one of the new houses, she might live the guts of a decade beyond. Also we have no idea is theres any money being left to the daughters, for all we know the son could be getting a farm worth a million quid and the daughters each getting a million before this land.

    We'd really need more details that probably can't be made public,


  • #75
    Alrigghtythen
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,365 ✭✭✭Alrigghtythen


    littelady wrote: »
    He has worked very hard even Christmas day.

    How much of a difference financially, practically & emotionally does an acre and a half make to him?


  • #76
    littelady
    Closed Accounts Posts: 340 ✭✭littelady


    I know my hubby would be happy to give money for a deposit instead. But that's a no go


  • #77
    Becks610
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 144 ✭✭Becks610


    I don’t think this should be an issue for ye as such. Surely the parents should decide.

    Have they thought about what will happen if they need care etc and who will pay etc. cos that could be a large cost down the line. Obviously one would assume that if the son gets the farm and three sisters don’t get the sites then the obligation would be on the son re care etc.

    Was the issue of the sites ever discussed cos we can all give our own opinion here ( probably all biased on our view and situation) but each family and situation is different.

    Also re the sisters not doing any work etc on the farm often that isn’t a choice. I think the sites and all other practicalities should be discussed and if people are in a huff over perceived unfairness then at least everyone knows where they stand.


  • #78
    shenanagans
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 896 ✭✭✭shenanagans


    Can you husband agree to give them sites subject to planning.

    If they go to the expense of planning permission etc. Then they really want to use the site.

    If they don't want to get planning then they are just being opportunists. And let them p**s off!

    And needless to say, they can't sell the sites.


  • #79
    Eric Cartman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,280 ✭✭✭✭Eric Cartman


    Alrigghtythen wrote: »
    How much of a difference financially, practically & emotionally does an acre and a half make to him?

    I'm sure somebody could clarify but firstly it might be a cash expense for the legal paperwork that the husband doesn't have for solicitors, then theres the issue of the sites services and where they come from, it might mean other bits of land are out of action or if there isn't a lot of road frontage , a reduction in the value of the remainder of the land far exceeding the acreage value, the bits of land wanted could have been earmarked for something else or going below a threshold of acreage could affect support payments.


  • #80
    I says
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,125 ✭✭✭I says


    Get all this sorted before anything is signed over and all parties are in agreement.
    Mark out the sites it’s only three acres when all is signed sealed and delivered plant leylandis around the sites and forget about it and be happy with the 197 acres yer getting and not be miserable with the three yer losing.


  • #81
    shenanagans
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 896 ✭✭✭shenanagans


    littelady wrote: »
    I know my hubby would be happy to give money for a deposit instead. But that's a no go

    Are the sisters attached... Married... Etc. Do they need the sites now.


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  • #82
    Pussyhands
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,239 ✭✭✭Pussyhands


    littelady wrote: »
    Can I ask the farmers here if you would be pissed off too?

    I personally would but I probably wouldn't prevent it happening, you'll only cause rifts in the family.


  • #83
    Alrigghtythen
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,365 ✭✭✭Alrigghtythen


    littelady wrote: »
    2 other sisters got deposits for houses in the town. The three remaining sisters want to live on the sites. They never worked on the farm.

    Do you do much around the farm yourself to deserve your free site?

    Why should they not have an opportunity to live in the neighbourhood they grew up in?


  • #84
    kurtainsider
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 324 ✭✭kurtainsider


    littelady wrote: »
    I guess they were having a conversation between them and decided to get sites before its too late.

    Well good for them. Their chances of getting a site (or an inheritance) afterwards sound very slim.

    To be absolutely serious - your husband needs to stand back and look at the big picture here.

    There's relationships with parents, siblings, in-laws, nephews and nieces to consider. There's a hand with cattle, there's a lift when you're stuck, there's Christmas's, birthdays, bbq's, someone to go to the pub with, share a joke with and all the things that make life worth living.

    Do your husband and yourself really put more value on 2 acres of land above all of that? That's the fundamental question here.


  • #85
    JeffKenna
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,628 ✭✭✭JeffKenna


    littelady wrote: »
    I know my hubby would be happy to give money for a deposit instead. But that's a no go

    Perhaps they feel love to the land/area much like your husband does.

    I've heard of a case like this where the sisters wanted to sell the sites on after once they got planning but if they want to live there I can't see why your husband thinks they shouldn't.


  • #86
    endacl
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,445 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    Do the sisters have kids who might be handy to have local in a few years for standing in gaps or picking stones?

    :D


  • #87
    littelady
    Closed Accounts Posts: 340 ✭✭littelady


    Eric Cartman wrote: »
    perhaps, but assuming the father dies first, who will look after the mother, surely she won't be leaving the farm house to go live in one of the new houses, she might live the guts of a decade beyond. Also we have no idea is theres any money being left to the daughters, for all we know the son could be getting a farm worth a million quid and the daughters each getting a million before this land.

    We'd really need more details that probably can't be made public,

    If my father in law dies he has made pervisions that the farm pays his wife a salary until her time comes. The girls will also get a lump sum I'm not sure of the figures my hubby won't as he will have the farm. Their home will be handed over to another sibling male this time who decided he doesn't want the farm and is happy this will be his inheritance


  • #88
    charolais0153
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,225 ✭✭✭charolais0153


    Im lucky here to the extent that my 3 sisters probably wont look for sites not that there is many to give. If they wanted one id prob give them one after ive chosen mine:)


  • #89
    littelady
    Closed Accounts Posts: 340 ✭✭littelady


    Alrigghtythen wrote: »
    Do you do much around the farm yourself to deserve your free site?

    Why should they not have an opportunity to live in the neighbourhood they grew up in?

    I have worked on the farm but I cannot now I was in a bad accident a couple of years back.


  • #90
    shenanagans
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 896 ✭✭✭shenanagans


    littelady wrote: »
    If my father in law dies he has made pervisions that the farm pays his wife a salary until her time comes. The girls will also get a lump sum I'm not sure of the figures my hubby won't as he will have the farm. Their home will be handed over to another sibling male this time who decided he doesn't want the farm and is happy this will be his inheritance

    I can't understand why all farming families can't agree like this. Put a plan in place. Everyone's happy. No family feud.


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  • #91
    kingdom fan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68 ✭✭kingdom fan


    kurtainsider wrote: »
    Well good for them. Their chances of getting a site (or an inheritance) afterwards sound very slim.

    To be absolutely serious - your husband needs to stand back and look at the big picture here.

    There's relationships with parents, siblings, in-laws, nephews and nieces to consider. There's a hand with cattle, there's a lift when you're stuck, there's Christmas's, birthdays, bbq's, someone to go to the pub with, share a joke with and all the things that make life worth living.

    Do your husband and yourself really put more value on 2 acres of land above all of that? That's the fundamental question here.

    You need to read my post to answer that


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