confession: i may be a bit homophobic!

sponsoredwalk · 29-05-2010 01:43PM

altairscreed wrote: »

Camp gay's wreck my head, i mean WTF are you, are you trying to be a girl because if you are then it's not working also do they have something wrong in their head's because who else act's like that, do they have no shame, have they ever heard of being embarressed, i dont give a sh1t about them being gay it's just how they act

Alright, there's been enough pure hate on this thread & I've read next to no-one respond against it.

Tell me, how does a man acting camp mean he is trying to act like a girl?

Tell me, if a girl is not prissy do you dislike her for being too mannish?

Tell me, why would someone be embarrassed for acting in a way they feel more comfortable? Should people with blue hair start apologising because they chose to change their hair blue today?

How do you know that there is something wrong in a persons head because they choose to act in a way that is more comfortable to them? I would say there's something wrong with you because you can't see that somebody has chosen to act in a way comfortable to them, they aren't afraid to do something that idiots perceive as embarrassing.

Tell me, when did being camp instantly mean you are gay? Have you ever met someone who you perceived as being camp only to find out they weren't gay?

It's always refreshing to hear that undercurrent of hate from Irish people, the annonymity of the internet definitely serves some good, I bet some of you would go nuts with all this PC rhetoric you read nowadays about equality :rolleyes: At least you have some way to unwind

Tar.Aldarion · 29-05-2010 02:04PM

pickarooney wrote: »

I'm a bit confused. There was a gay bad guy in Desperate Housewives?

*sinister music*

*shifty eyes*

*It's still really boring in Wisteria lane*

Links234 · 29-05-2010 02:16PM

The attitude among people here and even some people in the LGBT community that it's OK to hate camp or feminine gay men disturbs me. Part of it says "I'm ok with a gay man as long as I don't perceive him to be gay" and that's not acceptance or tolerance, it just means as long as you can bury your head in the sand about someone's sexuality it doesn't bother you. Then part of it is even more disturbing that says "I'm not ok with any non-standard form of gender expression, men must be completely masculine all the time and women must be completely feminine, and no deviations!" and the fact that there's come people in the LGBT community who sanction this specific brand of intolerance just makes it even worse.

Sometimes I suspect that some of the more straight-acting gay men are the ones that are putting on an act, not the feminine acting or camp ones.

sponsoredwalk · 29-05-2010 02:26PM

Another message here, very similar to that Links234 points out, is that it's okay to spread hate as long as your not the one who is the receipient of it.

Sorry · 29-05-2010 02:31PM

Links234 wrote: »

Sometimes I suspect that some of the more straight-acting gay men are the ones that are putting on an act, not the feminine acting or camp ones.

Was with you up until there.

Very curious to know what exactly you mean by 'straight-acting', and why you suspect these men to be putting on an act?

Mardy Bum · 29-05-2010 02:39PM

OP if you want to understand why you feel like you do read or watch some of Judith Butler's works. She is one of the leading gender and queer theorists in the world. Go to around 4.40 in the video link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALx1MEW2P3U&feature=related

MultiUmm · 29-05-2010 02:46PM

Links234 wrote: »

Sometimes I suspect that some of the more straight-acting gay men are the ones that are putting on an act, not the feminine acting or camp ones.

I think it's more down to individual personalities instead of 'acting' as people call it.

Some people are loud and flamboyant, some people aren't. Loud and flamboyant people naturally get noticed more by the media, hence the image of gay men being screaming queens.

I'm gay, and I admit I do adhere to one or two stereotypes (:P) but I don't go around flaunting my orientation.

Not saying that camp gay men act flamboyant just to flaunt their sexuality or anything. I just think people need to differentiate between individual persona's and judging everyone on a few examples.

havetoquit · 29-05-2010 02:51PM

My motto is live an let live and look beyond a person's sexuality if you want to get to know them. I cannot personally abide bigotry of any kind. Sadly many of the bigoted people I have met are disfunctional. If we have a problem with a person's sexuality when they are around us, then it is within ourselves we need to look for the answer. Anonymous people on these boards nomatter how well meaning and who do not know us cannot provide the answer. Human behaviour is a fascinating subject.

sponsoredwalk · 29-05-2010 02:52PM

Mardy Bum wrote: »

OP if you want to understand why you feel like you do read or watch some of Judith Butler's works. She is one of the leading gender and queer theorists in the world. Go to around 4.40 in the video link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALx1MEW2P3U&feature=related

Wow, I hope some of the people on this thread will watch that video from 4.40 to 7.00

Mardy Bum · 29-05-2010 03:06PM

sponsoredwalk wrote: »

Wow, I hope some of the people on this thread will watch that video from 4.40 to 7.00

Or if anybody is really interested and wants to understand gender and queer theory just buy her books. When you read these you will really understand it. Most people will be blown away by it.

Links234 · 29-05-2010 03:07PM

Sorry wrote: »

Was with you up until there.

Very curious to know what exactly you mean by 'straight-acting', and why you suspect these men to be putting on an act?

Straight acting might be a poor choice of words, I should have said typically masculine-acting, as in not camp or feminine.

I suspect that some gay men might try to act more typically masculine because as this thread shows, it's seemingly ok to hate someone for being perceived as feminine or camp, even to the point of being stigmatized by other gay men.

sponsoredwalk · 29-05-2010 03:16PM

Links234 wrote: »

I suspect that some gay men might try to act more typically masculine because as this thread shows, it's seemingly ok to hate someone for being perceived as feminine or camp, even to the point of being stigmatized by other gay men.

That's what I thought you meant, and I would say is the case sometimes.

Sorry · 29-05-2010 03:28PM

Links234 wrote: »

I suspect that some gay men might try to act more typically masculine because as this thread shows, it's seemingly ok to hate someone for being perceived as feminine or camp, even to the point of being stigmatized by other gay men.

sponsoredwalk wrote: »

That's what I thought you meant, and I would say is the case sometimes.

Perhaps it is sometimes the case, perhaps what people say above is sometimes the case. People will always say 'I know this guy who came out as gay and immediately began talking differently and acting all camp.' Then you have people making a judgment of all camp/effeminate gay men based on this.

They are both generalisations and equally unhelpful and judgmental. I don't assume that gay men acting 'typically masculine' are putting on an act any more than I assume 'camp' gay men are.

People from all sides have opinions concerning gender/sexuality that I believe to be a nonsense, but such is life. In my time, I've heard them all:

Camp men are gay.
Gays are effeminate.
Gay men who don't conform to the sterotypical notion of a homosexual man are straight-acting or self-hating.
Gay men who do conform to the stereotypical notion of a homosexual man are an embarrassment and are perpetuating the stereotype.
Gay men who don't wish to talk about their sexuality are betraying the cause.
Gay men who talk about their sexuality are in your face, blah blah blah

PTH2009 · 29-05-2010 03:34PM

id do find gay people a bit ignorant if youre not a female or gay urself.

sponsoredwalk · 29-05-2010 03:42PM

Sorry wrote: »

Perhaps it is sometimes the case, perhaps what people say above is sometimes the case. People will always say 'I know this guy who came out as gay and immediately began talking differently and acting all camp.' Then you have people making a judgment of all camp/effeminate gay men based on this.

Yeah, if that is so it's horrible & really thoughtless. If that ever happened well then there are so many other questions to ask instead of instantly assuming you have the answers.

Sorry wrote: »

People from all sides have opinions concerning gender/sexuality that I believe to be a nonsense, but such is life. In my time, I've heard them all:

Camp men are gay.
Gays are effeminate.
Gay men who don't conform to the sterotypical notion of a homosexual man are straight-acting or self-hating.
Gay men who do conform to the stereotypical notion of a homosexual man are an embarrassment and are perpetuating the stereotype.
Gay men who don't wish to talk about their sexuality are betraying the cause.
Gay men who talk about their sexuality are in your face, blah blah blah

Lol, you can't win :pac:

Seriously, if there's one thing psychology has taught us is that nearly all generalizations are bound to fail in some respect with regard to humans. Not even psychologists themselves can make sweeping claims, every attempt has to be rigorously backed up & is constantly criticized, (a good thing).

sock puppet · 29-05-2010 03:51PM

sponsoredwalk wrote: »

Alright, there's been enough pure hate on this thread & I've read next to no-one respond against it.

Tell me, how does a man acting camp mean he is trying to act like a girl?

Tell me, if a girl is not prissy do you dislike her for being too mannish?

Tell me, why would someone be embarrassed for acting in a way they feel more comfortable? Should people with blue hair start apologising because they chose to change their hair blue today?

How do you know that there is something wrong in a persons head because they choose to act in a way that is more comfortable to them? I would say there's something wrong with you because you can't see that somebody has chosen to act in a way comfortable to them, they aren't afraid to do something that idiots perceive as embarrassing.

Tell me, when did being camp instantly mean you are gay? Have you ever met someone who you perceived as being camp only to find out they weren't gay?

It's always refreshing to hear that undercurrent of hate from Irish people, the annonymity of the internet definitely serves some good, I bet some of you would go nuts with all this PC rhetoric you read nowadays about equality :rolleyes: At least you have some way to unwind

Fully agree with this. Also I don't even know where everyone meets these legions of in your face flamboyant gay men. Just because someone's camp doesn't mean they're obnoxious.

Sorry · 29-05-2010 03:52PM

sponsoredwalk wrote: »

Yeah, if that is so it's horrible & really thoughtless. If that ever happened well then there are so many other questions to ask instead of instantly assuming you have the answers.

Lol, you can't win :pac:

Seriously, if there's one thing psychology has taught us is that nearly all generalizations are bound to fail in some respect with regard to humans. Not even psychologists themselves can make sweeping claims, every attempt has to be rigorously backed up & is constantly criticized, (a good thing).

Hell, I know a man who gave away his complete boxset of Frasier when he found out that most of the male leads on the show were gay.

I also lived with a guy who secretly watched gay porn, left ads on gay hook-up sites and simultaneously relentlessly bullied a gay friend for being a 'fag.' He is the most homophobic person I've ever met. Funny how these homophobes tend to turn the conversation around to gay sex so often.

sponsoredwalk · 29-05-2010 04:17PM

Sorry wrote: »

Hell, I know a man who gave away his complete boxset of Frasier when he found out that most of the male leads on the show were gay.

:eek:

That is crazy!

Also, there weren't that many gay people on Fraiser, as far as I remember Niles was, Bulldog was and the food critic guy was. Hey, maybe that's where the legions of flamboyant, in your face, gay people came from - Fraiser :pac:

In any case, Fraiser rocks

Sorry wrote: »

I also lived with a guy who secretly watched gay porn, left ads on gay hook-up sites and simultaneously relentlessly bullied a gay friend for being a 'fag.' He is the most homophobic person I've ever met. Funny how these homophobes tend to turn the conversation around to gay sex so often.

Man, he sounds like one of those hypocritical evangelist preachers...

Sorry · 29-05-2010 04:35PM

sponsoredwalk wrote: »

:eek:

That is crazy!

Also, there weren't that many gay people on Fraiser, as far as I remember Niles was, Bulldog was and the food critic guy was. Hey, maybe that's where the legions of flamboyant, in your face, gay people came from - Fraiser :pac:

I heard the dad is too. Not sure about the dog

Anyway, he couldn't handle that, so some lucky person got the complete Frasier for free.

moonpurple · 29-05-2010 04:40PM

OP word on the grapevine is that gay men are not too comfortable with you either:pac:

havetoquit · 29-05-2010 05:36PM

You know what guys? We are on this earth for such a short time and time itself is so damn precious, why do you think that so many people are having problems accepting their fellow man as they come, and God knows, we all come with our weaknesses, faults and failings, so why be so judgemental of others and why be so affected by it? I guess that the problems some people seem to have with sexuality is to do with upbringing, how homosexuality was dealt with by society at the time they were growing up etc. It is and always will be a subject that some people will never be able to deal with, as with terminal illness, mental illness and so on. There is still a lot of ignorance out there and I do believe it is more ignorance than real full blown bigotry. Bigotry is perhaps born out of ignorance. If homosexuality was fully acceptable, why on earth do so many gay men and women so fear coming out. Why are we so surprised by the attitudes around us when some parents even disown or shun their own offspring for being different to what they expected. So cruel, so ignorant and so sad. I think the subject should be addressed in schools for a start. These are only my own simple opinions and hope they will be taken in the spirit in which they were intended.

bytey · 29-05-2010 06:18PM

would this be an example ?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMkxNahsrxg

MJ23 · 29-05-2010 06:56PM

Is hating Robbie Williams homophobic ?

altairscreed · 17-04-2018 11:29PM

altairscreed wrote: »

Camp gay's wreck my head, i mean WTF are you, are you trying to be a girl because if you are then it's not working also do they have something wrong in their head's because who else act's like that, do they have no shame, have they ever heard of being embarressed, i dont give a sh1t about them being gay it's just how they act

Just going through my old post and found this

Turns out I used to be an asshole.

AllForIt · 17-04-2018 11:34PM

You see, assholes can be nice.

beertons · 17-04-2018 11:35PM

8 years? Fancy waking up a few in the grave yard?

AnneFrank · 17-04-2018 11:44PM

Interesting thread,surprised it didn't get more replies. I have to admit to feeling a bit like the op but only with outrageously camp men but then each to their own lots of people don't like me !!

TheValeyard · 17-04-2018 11:47PM

How do you people fimd these ancient threads?

Some sort of necro spell?

JupiterKid · 17-04-2018 11:48PM

I’m gay myself but super camp flamboyant gay guys annoy me greatly. That said, I don’t hate them - live and let live.

Also there are camp straight men - anyone remember Frank Spencer from the 70s TV show Some Mothers Do ‘Ave Em?

But really camp guys IMO are not all that great in terms of numbers. It’s just that they are conspicuous.

alan partridge aha · 17-04-2018 11:50PM

Have a friend that's gay, not camp at all but would have no interest conversing with men that are. They annoy the fcuk out of me.

confession: i may be a bit homophobic!

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