Confession Box Thread: the worst thing you ever did?

neonsofa · 23-04-2017 10:16pm

fussyonion wrote: »

I pretended to faint just for attention from a fella I was mad about, but the school called an ambulance and I had to pretend I was "out" when the paramedics came and stretchered me off in an ambulance.
I'm actually still mortified about this.

This is my fave one

Birneybau · 23-04-2017 10:18pm

XsApollo wrote: »

I haven't done many bad things I think, never stole or any of that.

But I think I was 15, 16 and our usual gang was hanging around our housing estate where everybody knew everybody kids everywhere and always busy, we were always messing about, who could hit the ball off something ,bouncing on fences, the usual.

I picked up a rock and saw a trolley further down the road and said watch this lads into the trolley,
Hurled the rock into the air about 30 metres down the road.
Instead of going In the trolley, it smacked off the bonnet and through the rear window and into dash of the neighbours brand new Toyota carina E xli lean burn.
We all legged around the back of the estate and ended up at our houses which were say the opposite end the road where the car was , so we could see what would happen.

The owners son and his m8 were playing near enough the car, they were under 10 about 7 or 8 and were always up to **** , lighting fires and stuff , robbing sh*t.
So naturally they would get the blame.

Anyway the owner comes out about 30 mins later to go somewhere and doesn't notice until he sits in the car,
He gets out and asks the son what happened, the son blames his m8 says it was ( insert name )

Anyway the friends mother came out and chased the poor fella until she caught him up beside us and leathered the sh*t out of him asking him what the hell he has done and he crying he didn't do anything and his mother leathering him.

I didn't own up and they foot the bill I think.
That still haunts me and gets brought up whenever we are all together pis*sed and telling stories.

I was always throwing him some change for a good while after whenever I saw him.

This is worse.

23-04-2017 10:19pm

ticklebelly7 wrote: »

I used to go to the supermarket and sink my nails into the really fresh mushroons. My nails were at least half a centimetre long. I loved the feel of doing it and sometimes the mushroons would even squeak!
I also used to squeeze fresh salmon. Sometimes you'd get a whole salmon on a polystyrene tray wrapped in clingfilm. I used to pat the salmons and squeeze them but without breaking the clingfilm. It had to be salmon - trout didn't do it for me, and I certainly wouldn't lower myself to squeeze a smoked haddock fillet. I don't eat fish, I hate the stuff.
I'm not ashamed ...

I don't know if this is really funny or my sense of humour is really odd, but I laughed out loud at this!

23-04-2017 10:24pm

When I was about 13 and being a complete little horror because I wasn't getting my own way, I told my mother I didn't love her and I wished she was dead. The look on her face will stay with me forever and of course I didn't mean it and instantly regretted it. She instantly forgave me, but I will never think about it and not feel absolutely awful.

Not too long ago, woman who is constantly very unpleasant to me personally in work came out of the Ladies bathroom with her skirt tucked into her underwear, leaving her very exposed. I was going to stop her from walking through the busy main office floor but I didn't and just let her embarrass herself. I told myself it was funny, but was just so petty and mean-spirited and spiteful I feel very ashamed.

I'm pretty sure theres more I've probably stuffed to the back of my mind.

MyStubbleItches · 23-04-2017 10:35pm

Candie wrote: »

Not too long ago, woman who is constantly very unpleasant to me personally in work came out of the Ladies bathroom with her skirt tucked into her underwear, leaving her very exposed. I was going to stop her from walking through the busy main office floor but I didn't and just let her embarrass herself. I told myself it was funny, but was just so petty and mean-spirited and spiteful I feel very ashamed.

I'm pretty sure theres more I've probably stuffed to the back of my mind.

Can't see anything wrong with this. I believe 'karma' is responsible.

23-04-2017 10:37pm

MyStubbleItches wrote: »

Can't see anything wrong with this. I believe 'karma' is responsible.

The spitefulness involved is what makes it wrong.

MyStubbleItches · 23-04-2017 10:40pm

Candie wrote: »

The spitefulness involved is what makes it wrong.

I'd have thought like that before. Now, meh, cúnts are cúnts, I'll mind the people I care about and care about me. Let the cúnts be themselves and suffer the consequences.

Lady is a tramp · 23-04-2017 10:42pm

I'm trying to think of things I could post here, but even some of the mildest ones would get me into a lot of trouble.

Okay. Seeing as the title is religious-themed ... I may have at some stage in my past had access to holy communion bread, and snacked on it when I was peckish. Handfuls at a time, like. Loved the stuff!

Peregrine · 23-04-2017 10:44pm

A motorist — parked on a cycle lane — asked me if I knew where Dartmouth Square was. I said no.

I knew where Dartmouth Square was. I was going there. The wickedness of it all.

Birneybau · 23-04-2017 10:47pm

Peregrine wrote: »

A motorist — parked on a cycle lane — asked me if I knew where Dartmouth Square was. I said no.

I knew where Dartmouth Square was. I was going there. The wickedness of it all.

Burn in hell.

eurasian · 23-04-2017 10:50pm

For years I have lied to myself, trying to convince myself I was straight.

23-04-2017 10:50pm

RayM wrote: »

A rude old woman once annoyed me in SuperValu, so when she wasn't looking I shoved loads of sachets of Angel Delight into her trolley. You don't fuck with me and get away with it.

Peregrine wrote: »

A motorist — parked on a cycle lane — asked me if I knew where Dartmouth Square was. I said no.

I knew where Dartmouth Square was. I was going there. The wickedness of it all.

Total badasses.

Once I threw some non-recyclables in the recycling because I was too lazy to go to both chutes.

And I wasn't even sorry.

dizzyn · 23-04-2017 10:53pm

I robbed a freddo bar from a garage and still feel bad about it (I was like 7 at the time):o

the14thwarrior · 23-04-2017 10:58pm

I was working in a horrible job, and couldn't face another day in the job. It involved loads of heavy work, horrible cleaning out of bins etc I had been unemployed for ages and couldn't face going home to tell my mother i hated it. I slipped in work and while it was a spectacular fall, it didn't hurt at all. So i faked a back injury in work, and pretended i was so ill i had to go home. One of the supervisors drove me to the hospital, and insisted I stay and get seen to by a doctor. She phoned my mother and told her and my mother came down to wait until I was discharged. I had to keep the back injury up for days and days. My mother dropped my sick cert into work and when she saw the state of the place I was working , came home and told me I was never going back. Phew, the stress of keeping up the injury was awful, and I felt so bad everytime she came up and down the stairs with my meals. In my defense, I was young and my ma was real strict, and the thought of telling her I was lying........... i never did tell her, but i never did it again

pilly · 23-04-2017 10:58pm

Not getting any true confessions from me with just a tax dodge OP.

That's way down the list of sins.

Love persepolys post though. I'll have to think overnight which ones I can legally confess to.

Beanntraigheach · 23-04-2017 11:02pm

November 22nd, 1963. Dallas, Texas.
I was the infamous grassy knoll shooter.
phew, it feels good to get that off my chest after all these years.

(P.S. I did it for the money, a cool $3million. All arranged over the phone, to this day I have no idea who hired me although I have my suspicions.)

Jobs OXO · 23-04-2017 11:06pm

georgiecasey wrote: »

ah jaysus... that's nothing! is a drunken kiss even cheating?!

Nope. Doesn't count unless there is vjj pummelling or penile licky-licky

jimmy180sx · 23-04-2017 11:08pm

Few years back on a site, put the kettle on a to boil for a cup of tea..strange taste so imeadiatly thought it was the milk gone off...new milk the next day..filled the kettle...nope same ****ty taste..open the kettle...dead mouse boiled...never told the other lads...so always open your kettle to fill the water, never by the spout

23-04-2017 11:11pm

jimmy180sx wrote: »

Few years back on a site, put the kettle on a to boil for a cup of tea..strange taste so imeadiatly thought it was the milk gone off...new milk the next day..filled the kettle...nope same ****ty taste..open the kettle...dead mouse boiled...never told the other lads...so always open your kettle to fill the water, never by the spout

You just reminded me, the first time my chap stayed over and showered in my apartment, he used the loofah-type sponge thing I use for cleaning the loo to wash himself in the shower. Mainly because I left it in caddy ambivalently close to the shower.

I haven't told him though, there's nothing to gain.

Four Phucs Ache · 23-04-2017 11:14pm

Years ago when I was about 16 I was in my dad's bedroom looking out the window randomly and across the road at nothing.I seen my neighbour opposite by a few doors walking up his laneway.Their was a cat sitting on top of the pillar with his back to him.

For whatever reason the man took a massive swing at the sleepy cat and whacked him full force with his fist.The cat flew off the wall and whimpered away slowly limping.I was horrified and shocked and upset at what I saw.

This was 96 so everything was phone and mail order.

For about 6 months he got mountains of post and subscriptions for anything to do with fisting and pussy.

dark crystal · 23-04-2017 11:14pm

My dad is a plumber and used to work for a building company. They were building a new estate and would give my dad the keys to whatever house they were working on at the time.

Well, one day I noticed he had a key to the show home (carrying out final inspections and what not I guess) and I knicked it before I went out one night. After I'd been out on the lash with the boyfriend at the time, we went back to the show house and christened the main bedroom. Also the shower

I put the key back the next morning and the following Monday, I spent all day worrying my dad would get in trouble. He never mentioned anything about it, but left the company soon afterwards and I always wonder did he get in trouble for it. I still feel guilty over the fact I could have lost my dad his job, but I'll never know as I'd never admit it to him...

MysticMonk · 23-04-2017 11:17pm

jimmy180sx wrote: »

Few years back on a site, put the kettle on a to boil for a cup of tea..strange taste so imeadiatly thought it was the milk gone off...new milk the next day..filled the kettle...nope same ****ty taste..open the kettle...dead mouse boiled...never told the other lads...so always open your kettle to fill the water, never by the spout

A friend of a friend was an archaeologist and ground up a bit of human bone and threw it in a full pot of tea in their common room.

Pretty sure not one of the four people who drank it suspected they were actually commiting cannabilism

pilly · 23-04-2017 11:20pm

MysticMonk wrote:

A friend of a friend was an archaeologist and ground up a bit of human bone and threw it in a full pot of tea in their common room.

What? Why? -))

MysticMonk · 23-04-2017 11:23pm

pilly wrote: »

What? Why? -))

For the sheer ****ing badness of it i would imagine

23-04-2017 11:26pm

pilly wrote: »

Not getting any true confessions from me with just a tax dodge OP.

That's way down the list of sins.

Love persepolys post though. I'll have to think overnight which ones I can legally confess to.

it's actually quite a relief to hear someone say "just" a tax dodge!

But you're right. Although I cheated my country out of what was (to me) a significant amount, it's not the very worst.

Well for another thing, I once eagle-eyed my ex girlfriend's iPhone pin and, when she was in the shower, checked her WhatsApps. Again, it's not the worst I've done (probably shouldn't put my worst in writing) but it's one of my least proud moments. Purely insensitive and selfish behaviour. If someone did that to me I'd be livid. Had a go of her Facebook's messages and gmail too.

Of course it all ended when I realised she'd subscribed to her.ie

Tell me how · 23-04-2017 11:46pm

I shifted my mates girlfriend, without actually doing it....

We were all staying in a house after night club and I was sleeping on couch in sitting room. Total darkness. Girl came in and lay down beside me. I was sure it was aforementioned gf but went along with it. After a few minutes she said something and I clicked who it was. Not the gf after all.

I was best man at their wedding a few years later. At the speeches I said, I've a story for ye... but didn't say a word about this one.

Did think of it though while I was giving the speech.

Cee-Jay-Cee · 23-04-2017 11:54pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

You got there before me!

As previously mentioned I have driven with drink taken and it wasn't a million years ago. I can be a somewhat erratic driver. Penalty points, speeding fines.

Once I was all mixed up and confused so I meddled unnecessarily in a good friends new relationship.

I've threatened someone.

I slapped a random guy in a pub one night because I felt like an idiot.

I've thrown drinks over people.

I've lied.

I've said "I love you" when I haven't really meant it.

I comfort eat and comfort drink.

I spent my twenties on antidepressants.

I smashed a room up.

I know what it's like to truly hate.

I once told an ex after we had broken up that I had a miscarriage. It was a lie.

The worst of all was how difficult I was at times with my mam. I made her cry and that still haunts me

Is that you Marie??? You bitch, you fugged me up with that miscarriage story but I'm over you now. You really were a crazy messed up person. All my friends called you 'psycho-chick'

PS: I hate you.

bubbles o hara · 23-04-2017 11:55pm

Four Phucs Ache wrote: »

Years ago when I was about 16 I was in my dad's bedroom looking out the window randomly and across the road at nothing.I seen my neighbour opposite by a few doors walking up his laneway.Their was a cat sitting on top of the pillar with his back to him.

For whatever reason the man took a massive swing at the sleepy cat and whacked him full force with his fist.The cat flew off the wall and whimpered away slowly limping.I was horrified and shocked and upset at what I saw.

This was 96 so everything was phone and mail order.

For about 6 months he got mountains of post and subscriptions for anything to to with fisting and pussy.

Good for you! In my eyes, you're a hero.

Birneybau · 23-04-2017 11:55pm

nhunter100 wrote: »

Cheated on my wife with the wife of a well known politician.

I hope it was Michael Lowry. His wife I mean.

Birneybau · 23-04-2017 11:57pm

Tell me how wrote: »

I shifted my mates girlfriend, without actually doing it....

We were all staying in a house after night club and I was sleeping on couch in sitting room. Total darkness. Girl came in and lay down beside me. I was sure it was aforementioned gf but went along with it. After a few minutes she said something and I clicked who it was. Not the gf after all.

I was best man at their wedding a few years later. At the speeches I said, I've a story for ye... but didn't say a word about this one. Did think of it though while I was giving the speech.

Confession Box Thread: the worst thing you ever did?

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