Most Awkward Job Interview Ever!

ahlookit · 11-08-2016 11:30AM

I saw a CV from a person (in fairness English wasn't their first language) applying for an IT job. They wanted to say they worked on "disparate systems", unfortunately they wrote "desperate systems". While that was probably good prep for the role being offered, they weren't successful.

Another one - again for a job in IT - rather than mention any of the subjects/projects they were doing in their IT post grad course felt it more relevant to mention they were fully qualified in forklift driving.

OldMrBrennan83 · 11-08-2016 11:37AM

This post has been deleted.

Smondie · 11-08-2016 11:39AM

Patww79 wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

That's cover letter material.[/quote]
I agree. The cover letter is the place to explain why your are suited to the role/company.

Piggystardust · 11-08-2016 02:43PM

I've just come from another interview where she asked me if I'm funny. Very bizarre question. Luckily I'm hilarious so I breezed it

She later asked me how my friends would describe me. I bluntly said.. I have no friends then laughed to show I was joking. She was stone faced. Awkward!!!

ohnonotgmail · 11-08-2016 02:47PM

ahlookit wrote: »

I saw a CV from a person (in fairness English wasn't their first language) applying for an IT job. They wanted to say they worked on "disparate systems", unfortunately they wrote "desperate systems". While that was probably good prep for the role being offered, they weren't successful.

Another one - again for a job in IT - rather than mention any of the subjects/projects they were doing in their IT post grad course felt it more relevant to mention they were fully qualified in forklift driving.

maybe they thought they would be working on a data warehouse?

ahlookit · 11-08-2016 03:04PM

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

maybe they thought they would be working on a data warehouse?

ohnonotgmail · 11-08-2016 03:05PM

ahlookit wrote: »

i know. my talent is wasted here.

Bandana boy · 11-08-2016 03:08PM

I had a very thorough interview process for a very technical job many years ago.
Last step was hiring manager likes you but the VP over our division wants a telephone interview before he signs off on it. This guys was a very big wig in at the time in one of the largest (top 40 by turnover) companies in the world.

Scheduled 30 mins with me of which 15 mins was discussing the merits of Stand by me as a film and the run of hits that Rob Reiner had at that time and why they had dried up.
My area of expertise has nothing what so ever to do with Film.

Jawgap · 11-08-2016 03:10PM

3 spring to mind (all with me as an interviewer rather than interviewee)....

Candidate 1......we're running a bit behind with the interviews and he has arrived on time. One of the people helping to organise the interviews looks after him for the 30 minute delay, and when he comes into the room he walks over, leans on the table, gets right in the face of the lead interviewer and proceeds to berate him in a very passive-aggressive way about the delay.....needless to say didn't get the job!!

Candidate 2......is asked a relatively straightforward question that's intended to get them talking.....she promptly dissolves into tears!! The tears get worse as she realises she's cocked up.....turns out she was expecting the question and had prepared the killer answer and then when it was asked her brain blanked!! We postponed the interview, told her to go home and come back the next day....completely nailed the interview and got the job.

Candidate 3......was asked a very open question that was intended to allow them to expound on their experience and relate it to the role to show they are right for it. They describe a number of relevant-ish projects they've been involved in, the produce a Bible from their bag and proceed to quote scripture to demonstrate the link between their work, our needs and their suitability......didn't get the job!

maudgonner · 11-08-2016 03:10PM

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

i know. my talent is wasted here.

If you get asked in an interview whether you are funny...maybe go with 'no'.

:pac:

joeguevara · 11-08-2016 03:11PM

techdiver wrote: »

Asking that dumb "what are your weaknesses" question, to me, is a sign of a poor interviewer.

Over the years I've turned down jobs based on stupid interviewers who think they are trying to be clever asking the list of bull**** questions they find on Google!

So what are your weaknesses?

Honesty!

Well I don't think that that is really a weakness.

I don't give a fcuk what you think!

Dyr · 11-08-2016 03:13PM

I think one of the problems with growing old is you just get pissed off rathern than flustered when people throw bull**** curve balls at you

ohnonotgmail · 11-08-2016 03:13PM

maudgonner wrote: »

If you get asked in an interview whether you are funny...maybe go with 'no'.

:pac:

Tough crowd.

Pac1Man · 11-08-2016 03:21PM

The generic answer for the weakness question is something along the lines of 'my commitment to finishing my work may sometimes cause me to stay later' blah blah. It's a weakness to you but not to the company.

It's a bull**** answer to a bull**** question but I suppose it weeds out a few crazies.

westcoast66 · 11-08-2016 03:23PM

A few spring to mind:

- Interviewed a guy once who brought his mother into the interview as he didn't speak English but she did. Very strange.

- A candidate arrived 30 minutes late in Jeans/Tshirt. Told us he would need to be paid extra as the office was so far from Dublin. (About 12 miles).

- Interviewed a deaf guy who insisted he could hear no problem. We had to write down most questions.

lawred2 · 11-08-2016 03:26PM

Piggystardust wrote: »

My sister lives in London and works for this 'funky' Graphic Design Company who are appartently a pack of arrogant d*cks, particularly when it comes to interviewing people.

As she's a Manager, she's sat in on a few interviews and told me of a few scenarios that would make David Brent cringe.

Their theory or logic is that if you don't fit in with their idea of 'wackiness' you're not a right fit for the company so they'd do things such as:

* Ask the person to take a seat when they walk into the room only there are no chairs. The right candidate would apparently just sit on the floor, no sweat.

* Ask the person to pour some water for everyone but there's only an empty jug on the table and no glasses.

* Ask the person would they mind taking off their hat when they're not wearing one.

And so forth. I think it's kinda funny but also quite cruel!

Anyway, I've just come from a really awkward interview where I'd told the girl already that the company I work for know I'm actively seeking a new job. She asked had I been job hunting long and I said no not at all. She then said so you're actively job hunting but haven't started looking?! I just nodded like a moron. Then she asked me my greatest weakness (I thought my idiocy was already evident) to which I stumbled and said eeemmmmmm I'm really shy. Wtf. Why would I say that?!

Ugh. My other sister panicked once when asked what role she thoght she'd play in the company and said.. eh... an astronaut, I'm really into astrology. She isn't even!

So, any cringey awkward interview tales happen to any of you folks?

As for that 'wacky' company in question - I would find them anything but wacky. Forced humour is no humour.

knobheads.

lawred2 · 11-08-2016 03:28PM

razorblunt wrote: »

I was conducting an interview once and I can't remember how it came about but I think I was clarifying an answer of his and used a hand gesture denoting a "you just have to hold your hands up sometimes" way and for some reason he reached across the table and high fived me. Barely connected with it too, I just looked at the HR person next to me and he responded with "sorry I don't know why I did that".

Neither did I, neither did I.

lol

Red Kev · 11-08-2016 03:30PM

About 15 years ago I sat on an interview panel for a project leader for an EU development project in Africa. I was the only one with experience in that area on the ground so was asked to sit in. The interviews were in Strasbourg.

One interviewee came in, her CV was odd as she had no experience in the role or anything remotely like it, she was also very young, about 25, whereas you'd need a minimum of 8-10 years on the ground experience in these roles to have a chance of getting anywhere, so it was strange that her CV got past the first two hurdles. Turns out she was Irish.

When asked why she would make the best candidate she answered that her uncle was an MEP who sat on some board that determined the funding (her uncle was an MEP, he sat on a board, but would have no influence over the amount or direction of funding, it was a project that's been ongoing for over 3 decades).

So what else do you have to offer? Well, if I don't get it, then I'll make sure you get no further funding (yeah right!).

But you've no experience? So hire someone in as my subordinate who can do the job. I've no intention of running around with a load of blacks and won't be shifting from here (meaning Europe).

What's the first thing you'd change if you were project leader? I'd move head office from Brussels to Paris, I don't like Brussels, Paris is way nicer.

At this stage I said to her that I think that's all we need to know and goodbye.

"So when do I start"

"Sorry, you won't be getting the job, thanks and bye"

"I'll find out who you lot are and ye will never work for the EU again"

She had been employed straight out of Uni by the EU for big money for a graduate, but she never got a permanent role, when her uncle left as MEP she was gone within a few months. Seriously crazy totally delusioned woman, with no idea of how life functions outside of her own protected little circle.

PaddyWilliams · 11-08-2016 03:32PM

Red Kev wrote: »

About 15 years ago I sat on an interview panel for a project leader for an EU development project in Africa. I was the only one with experience in that area on the ground so was asked to sit in. The interviews were in Strasbourg.

One interviewee came in, her CV was odd as she had no experience in the role or anything remotely like it, she was also very young, about 25, whereas you'd need a minimum of 8-10 years on the ground experience in these roles to have a chance of getting anywhere, so it was strange that her CV got past the first two hurdles. Turns out she was Irish.

When asked why she would make the best candidate she answered that her uncle was an MEP who sat on some board that determined the funding (her uncle was an MEP, he sat on a board, but would have no influence over the amount or direction of funding, it was a project that's been ongoing for over 3 decades).

So what else do you have to offer? Well, if I don't get it, then I'll make sure you get no further funding (yeah right!).

But you've no experience? So hire someone in as my subordinate who can do the job. I've no intention of running around with a load of blacks and won't be shifting from here (meaning Europe).

What's the first thing you'd change if you were project leader? I'd move head office from Brussels to Paris, I don't like Brussels, Paris is way nicer.

At this stage I said to her that I think that's all we need to know and goodbye.

"So when do I start"

"Sorry, you won't be getting the job, thanks and bye"

"I'll find out who you lot are and ye will never work for the EU again"

She had been employed straight out of Uni by the EU for big money for a graduate, but she never got a permanent role, when her uncle left as MEP she was gone within a few months. Seriously crazy totally delusioned woman, with no idea of how life functions outside of her own protected little circle.

Wow, speechless.

lawred2 · 11-08-2016 03:40PM

Utah wrote: »

I've done this a few times, mostly over the phone. It's so hard to answer the technical coding questions off the top of your head!

It's also stupid

What separates good programmers from bad is not their ability to answer technical questions without preparation but their ability to research using all the tools at their disposal..

CINCLANTFLT · 11-08-2016 03:42PM

Back in the very early 00's, at quite a young age, I was very qualified and experienced in some internet related technology... very well paid and interesting work for one of the big tech firms... and our whole team were forever being headhunted by tech companies...

I agree to do a telephone interview with some company planning to set-up a big co-location data centre in Dublin - it may have been something to do with Global Crossing? Meanwhile, existing employer takes us on a day out of team building in an outdoor adventure centre, where I managed to slip a disc in my back! Doctor gives me a pile of "relaxants" and "pain killers" and I take to the bed...

Tech company rings me for phone interview after I had taken all my doses - I am not sure what we discussed, but I got feedback to say they most definitely were not pursuing me for a job now...

WHIP IT! · 11-08-2016 03:43PM

Red Kev wrote: »

About 15 years ago I sat on an interview panel for a project leader for an EU development project in Africa. I was the only one with experience in that area on the ground so was asked to sit in. The interviews were in Strasbourg.

One interviewee came in, her CV was odd as she had no experience in the role or anything remotely like it, she was also very young, about 25, whereas you'd need a minimum of 8-10 years on the ground experience in these roles to have a chance of getting anywhere, so it was strange that her CV got past the first two hurdles. Turns out she was Irish.

When asked why she would make the best candidate she answered that her uncle was an MEP who sat on some board that determined the funding (her uncle was an MEP, he sat on a board, but would have no influence over the amount or direction of funding, it was a project that's been ongoing for over 3 decades).

So what else do you have to offer? Well, if I don't get it, then I'll make sure you get no further funding (yeah right!).

But you've no experience? So hire someone in as my subordinate who can do the job. I've no intention of running around with a load of blacks and won't be shifting from here (meaning Europe).

What's the first thing you'd change if you were project leader? I'd move head office from Brussels to Paris, I don't like Brussels, Paris is way nicer.

At this stage I said to her that I think that's all we need to know and goodbye.

"So when do I start"

"Sorry, you won't be getting the job, thanks and bye"

"I'll find out who you lot are and ye will never work for the EU again"

She had been employed straight out of Uni by the EU for big money for a graduate, but she never got a permanent role, when her uncle left as MEP she was gone within a few months. Seriously crazy totally delusioned woman, with no idea of how life functions outside of her own protected little circle.

So, after she supposedly said that ^^^ you still asked her another question?? C'mon...

FunLover18 · 11-08-2016 03:47PM

Had an interview with AA roadwatch to be one of their updaters on radio, hadn't done research and straight off the bat was asked how I thought they got their information. I get giddy when I'm nervous sonic made a crack about them having a helicopter. I apologised for being nervous and was told I was coming across as sarcastic.

I didn't get the job.

Bandana boy · 11-08-2016 03:48PM

CINCLANTFLT wrote: »

Back in the very early 00's, at quite a young age, I was very qualified and experienced in some internet related technology... very well paid and interesting work for one of the big tech firms... and our whole team were forever being headhunted by tech companies...

I agree to do a telephone interview with some company planning to set-up a big co-location data centre in Dublin - it may have been something to do with Global Crossing? Meanwhile, existing employer takes us on a day out of team building in an outdoor adventure centre, where I managed to slip a disc in my back! Doctor gives me a pile of "relaxants" and "pain killers" and I take to the bed...

Tech company rings me for phone interview after I had taken all my doses - I am not sure what we discussed, but I got feedback to say they most definitely were not pursuing me for a job now...

I am thinking of Spuds interview on Speed in Trainspotting

lawred2 · 11-08-2016 03:49PM

FunLover18 wrote: »

Had an interview with AA roadwatch to be one of their updaters on radio, hadn't done research and straight off the bat was asked how I thought they got their information. I get giddy when I'm nervous sonic made a crack about them having a helicopter. I apologised for being nervous and was told I was coming across as sarcastic.

I didn't get the job.

did they ask you to speak super quick for 60 seconds with a mid atlantic/socodu accent while not taking a breath?

and do you have a double barrel surname?

MeatTwoVeg · 11-08-2016 03:52PM

WHIP IT! wrote:

So, after she supposedly said that ^^^ you still asked her another question?? C'mon...

The whole story doesn't sound even remotely credible.

westcoast66 · 11-08-2016 03:52PM

Red Kev wrote: »

About 15 years ago I sat on an interview panel for a project leader for an EU development project in Africa. I was the only one with experience in that area on the ground so was asked to sit in. The interviews were in Strasbourg.

One interviewee came in, her CV was odd as she had no experience in the role or anything remotely like it, she was also very young, about 25, whereas you'd need a minimum of 8-10 years on the ground experience in these roles to have a chance of getting anywhere, so it was strange that her CV got past the first two hurdles. Turns out she was Irish.

When asked why she would make the best candidate she answered that her uncle was an MEP who sat on some board that determined the funding (her uncle was an MEP, he sat on a board, but would have no influence over the amount or direction of funding, it was a project that's been ongoing for over 3 decades).

So what else do you have to offer? Well, if I don't get it, then I'll make sure you get no further funding (yeah right!).

But you've no experience? So hire someone in as my subordinate who can do the job. I've no intention of running around with a load of blacks and won't be shifting from here (meaning Europe).

What's the first thing you'd change if you were project leader? I'd move head office from Brussels to Paris, I don't like Brussels, Paris is way nicer.

At this stage I said to her that I think that's all we need to know and goodbye.

"So when do I start"

"Sorry, you won't be getting the job, thanks and bye"

"I'll find out who you lot are and ye will never work for the EU again"

She had been employed straight out of Uni by the EU for big money for a graduate, but she never got a permanent role, when her uncle left as MEP she was gone within a few months. Seriously crazy totally delusioned woman, with no idea of how life functions outside of her own protected little circle.

Whats she doing now? Probably married some hot shot with loads of money and has to do feck all!

FunLover18 · 11-08-2016 04:03PM

lawred2 wrote:

did they ask you to speak super quick for 60 seconds with a mid atlantic/socodu accent while not taking a breath?

No and that's what I'd been practicing instead of researching where they got their information which I presumed they would already know.

Jamie Starr · 11-08-2016 04:15PM

Bombed a group interview once because member of the panel was a dead ringer for Superbad-era Jonah Hill. I wasn't able to latch onto a single thing he was saying - all I could think of was him obsessively hiding dick drawings in the filing cabinet.

gormdubhgorm · 11-08-2016 05:11PM

Pac1Man wrote: »

The generic answer for the weakness question is something along the lines of 'my commitment to finishing my work may sometimes cause me to stay later' blah blah. It's a weakness to you but not to the company.

It's a bull**** answer to a bull**** question but I suppose it weeds out a few crazies.

A weakness is a strength taken too far....for example...

Most Awkward Job Interview Ever!

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