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18 year old get out of the house.

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    #122
    stargazer 68
    Registered Users Posts: 5,076 ✭✭✭stargazer 68


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121540051#Comment_121540051

    And his little sister 'snitching' on him twice adds fuel to that fire too!



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    #123
    lbunnae
    Registered Users Posts: 1,760 ✭✭✭lbunnae


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121540086#Comment_121540086

    In fairness if by a miracle he can find somewhere he would be better off out of there.



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    #124
    HildaOgdenx
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,466 Mod ✭✭✭✭HildaOgdenx


    Mod - @lbunnae @stargazer 68 please read my reminder, upthread.

    • PI is not a discussion forum.
    • Posts in PI should contain civil well-phrased advice for the OP.
    • Having a back and forth discussion with other posters derails the thread and is unfair to the OP.

    Please read the charter in the sticky at the top of the forum before posting here again

    Hilda



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    #125
    Soilse
    Registered Users Posts: 111 ✭✭Soilse


    Do you have space that could be used as a bedsit, small caravan that can be used. There is a housing crises but sounds like this lad needs some independence to allow him to grow up and have a place of his own. Everyone has said it all but I remember when I was 18 we went out until all hours. It's how we socialised by being in pub you should have put a round in for him and his friends in the pub and treated him like the man you want him to be.



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    #126
    Caranica
    Registered Users Posts: 10,011 ✭✭✭✭Caranica


    If your son is 17 what is he doing in the pub?

    You reap what you sow OP, I agree with those who have suggested family therapy. Kicking him out at 18 will do untold damage to your family.



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    #127
    Dav010
    Registered Users Posts: 14,004 ✭✭✭✭Dav010


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121541329#Comment_121541329

    I wouldn’t be too judgemental, if you have kids, there is a good chance they were in a pub when 17, if they aren’t that age yet, they will be in a pub at 17. Besides, the op said he is 18 next week.

    Whether asking the boy to leave is a good idea or not, if he wants the freedom to make his own decisions, then he should paddle his own canoe, if he wants the benefit of living at home, then there are rules which come with that benefit.

    Few parents are perfect, there is a good chance that to reach the point where the op posted, there are a lot more incidents besides.



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    #128
    TheSunIsShining
    Registered Users Posts: 167 ✭✭TheSunIsShining


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121538691#Comment_121538691

    Being a parent is very bloody hard. I saw Parenthood recently on the TV. What seemed like a comedy when I was a teenager, seemed more like a documentary/reality TV show as an adult and a parent myself!

    None of us knows the answer to all this. You just have to do your best. But like everything in life, communication is never too far away from being part of the solution......

    As I said above - best of luck with everything to you both.



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    #129
    rob316
    Registered Users Posts: 17,963 ✭✭✭✭rob316


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121536146#Comment_121536146

    Even if they are in education you'd show your kids the door at 18? Glad your not my parent.

    There was a simple rule in my house, go to college and you will be supported. Go to work, you gotta hand up cash every week to contribute. I choose the later and left home at 20. Honestly I wish I had stayed at home longer, it was serious reality check. I was a complete asshole at that age, rebelled at every opportunity against my parents from 14 till I left.

    OP- Sending your husband down the pub to look for him on Xmas eve at 8pm is too much though, I understand you probably want to have a family evening but been with your parents at that age is the last thing you want to do.

    Your son is been pretty typical of a lad that age, its finding the right balance parenting him. Just because hes 18 a light bulb doesn't go off in his head "ok I'm a man now time to grow up", all 18 year olds are still very immature. I brought endless trouble to my parents door, fought continuously with my younger siblings, never once did they show me the door, they did a fantastic job handling me looking back as a parent now myself.



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