How much to put in for wedding nowadays

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130102#Comment_119130102

Kettle. Both of us would be delighted with that as we go through them for some strange reason.

Jesus i gave e100 at a cousins wedding recently and felt it was a lot

Who do be giving 5 and 600,are people shítting money😳😳

Xidu

I remembered 5 years ago colleagues wedding we were already giving 150e 😫😫

hayse

Underwear makes a nice present. Essential item, just not used for obvious reasons

Still stihl waters 3

200 is plenty for anyone

Icsics

€150

NSAman

It all depends,on the relationship. Heading back to Ireland for a wedding next year. My god daughter. Yes it’s going to be expensive with flights etc. But it’s family.

obviously I have known her all her life. My partner for the past 15 years. She has been very close to us and her future husband is a rock. Needless to say €100 isn’t suitable. There will be other members of my family there and it will be a rather large wedding.

the rule with us is the following:

friends/acquaintances €300

family depending on closeness:€500-1000

close family:€1000+

everyone has to make a decision based on their ability. There are no hard and fast rules.

a wedding last year saw a rule from the bride and groom (very close friends) said no presents, your presence is all we want.. our friends.

this of course was never going to happen, and despite protests, my partner and I bought them something that they had wanted for a long time (always listen to what people want). It,doesn’t have to be expensive but if it is something that has meaning and you know the people involved well, it says more than money.

cuttingtimber22

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130803#Comment_119130803

I bet you get invited to lots of weddings.

hayse

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130828#Comment_119130828

I’d safely say you don’t either.

cuttingtimber22

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130845#Comment_119130845

Why the need to be personal and nasty?

the other poster is very generous and I said that tongue in cheek.

NSAman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130828#Comment_119130828

We get invited to lots of things, weddings are my least favourite 😜

next invitation is to a child naming ceremony in Southern Europe. A good friend is naming his child and has invited us to be the “sponsors” never done this before so looking forward to it, different culture, different tradition. Tis going to be a hard trek…8000 mile flight but a nice holiday as well.. 😀

hayse

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130860#Comment_119130860

Ah relax will you, snowflake.

cuttingtimber22

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130876#Comment_119130876

Sounds great. It is quite privileged to attend different traditions.

Not a great fan of weddings either - grand but one or two a year max.

Xidu

wow close family €1000 plus

and I would love to be that generous but I guess we are not that rich yet.

mind ask your finance situation allow u to spend that much, right?

Jim_Hodge

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130880#Comment_119130880

More insults. Catch yourself on: it's neither clever nor funny.

Liberty_Bear

Ive given €50 for a wedding :)

Atlantic Dawn

Depends on the wedding, if it's a pure shakedown money raising wedding (250 plus guests), I will give €100. If it's a normal sized wedding €150.

Xidu

3 of them are 200-220 guests

1 of them is 150 guests

Dial Hard

I can't believe your cousins invited your kids to their weddings. That's madness. I certainly didn't invite my cousins' kids to mine. I didn't even invite all my cousins, actually.

Xander10

Do the bride and groom make a note of who gave what?

I'd imagine only a particular stingy or generous donation would be remembered.

pgj2015

Just decline the invite like I do for 99% of weddings even friends weddings, you only really need to go to your siblings weddings. I have lost a few so called friends over this but they obviously weren't good friends to begin with, I always give a good present if I get an invite and dont go. This still isn't enough for some people and they cut contact soon after.

Xidu

Can’t decline the 2 cousins wedding or my mother in law will have me killed.😜

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119130663#Comment_119130663

Seriously 150!? I hope that was a pool for a colleague?

Nigel Fairservice

Very generous presents for your brother in law and cousins. For me I suppose it depends on how close I feel to someone. My first cousins wedding was in the UK recently. None of my first cousins on one side of my family were born or grew up in Ireland so I don't know many of them well at all. I had only met the cousin getting married a handful of times, we are essentially strangers to each other. It was nice to be asked to the wedding and all that but I would have felt a bit awkward going over to it. I didn't go but I gave her a present of £100. When I was best man for a close friend's wedding I gave him €500. Another close friend who I have known for 20 years is getting married soon. I will give him €400. For other weddings we tend to give €200.

Sunrise_Sunset

Hijacking....but what would be the going rate for a wedding party? Friends, not family. They're having a small family only wedding and then a party the following night. A great way to do it, in my opinion. But dunno how much to give.

Jim_Hodge

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119131786#Comment_119131786

Look, it's up to you. What can you easily afford? It's not a money gathering exercise. It's a gift to make to occasion. Is there a gift they'd like, rather than cash? Every situation is different. People overthink these things.

NSAman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119131020#Comment_119131020

You only give what you can afford. We have been lucky in life. Both herself and myself have good businesses and we look after as many people as we can. My staff are paramount and always get taken care of, babies, marriages, new homes, issues etc. Family get taken care of, as you would expect. My own family come first, by that I mean my kids, my brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces and the cousins etc. Family for us is the only thing in life. We have a large family and a huge circle of very good friends. We are blessed!

have always been a believer in look after people correctly and they look after you.

should herself and myself decide to tie the knot, it’ll be a massive shindig…but… I do not want anything from anyone, I just want them to be there to share and enjoy themselves.

touts

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119131442#Comment_119131442

Hire a hitman to whack her first. Expensive upfront but it sounds like you'll save money in the long run 🤣

JupiterKid

Reading this thread makes me so very glad that my attending wedding days of friends/relatives/family etc are, for the most part, long over. 😁👍️👍️

Weddings are a royal pain in every orifice - and "destination" weddings - especially to some very far-flung location - are usually born out of self-centeredness and a lack of consideration for others who may not be able to realistically afford to travel and stump up all the expenses.

We have that disgraced and discredited gimp Eddie Hobbs to thank for pushing the concept of the money-making "shakedown" wedding during the bubble years.

Juran

When I invite friends, family and neighbors to a BBQ or dinner party at our house, I dont expect gifts, and I invite them knowing I will pay for the food and drink, as I am hosting them, and happy to do so. (And we know most bring a bottle or a 6-pack, which is nice of them, and most gets drunk).

Then why if you host a wedding and invite the same crowd would you expect them to give you hundreds of euros ? If you invite people to your wedding, you are agreeing to host them, and provide food/drink.

Wedding years ago, up until the early 80's, when people had very little and a wedding was the only annual social event in the village or town was a real celebration and time of joy. The wedding cost very little, food provided by relatives, drink provided by the father, uncles, etc. celebrations in a house or community hall. A few pounds gift meant so much as bride & groom, they probably had nothing, and the money would go towards a house, site, etc. Its different now, people are spending 30 to 50k on weddings, they have their house, cars, jobs, etc ... and still expect guests to pay for costs (meal, drink) plus extra as the 'gift'. I personally thinks its lost meaning and is a pure money racket.