Cheating

EmmetSpiceland

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118889399#Comment_118889399

Because nothing spices up a relationship quite like herpes.

NedsNotDead

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118892471#Comment_118892471

Not if you take precautions

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118893016#Comment_118893016

Like casteration

EmmetSpiceland

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118893328#Comment_118893328

Pour some sugar on me.

89897

No one who really cares for the person they are with will cheat!

I've known people that cheat and said they wouldn't leave their partner cause it'd hurt them too much?! Like what the hell is that for an excuse! The cheating is gonna hurt much worse. Its their pride and pocket they are afraid of hurting. These seemingly perfect family people when in reality they couldn't give a sh1te.

What a wicked way to treat someone you claim to love and made promises to. If you cant and have no intention to be faithful dont enter monogamous relationships. Its only messes with an innocent persons self esteem and health.

B.A._Baracus

Yeah, I got cheated on before in the past. Usual garbage ensued.... lies, that it was all in my head. Anything but tell the truth like. She was just a crazy tart. But I was young.

Ultimately, cheating all comes down to a person doing what they wanted. You could hear a million excuses from a million different people. But they all did it because they wanted to.

Potential-Monke

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118890030#Comment_118890030

I didn't go into detail, but I wasn't on duty, I was on a night out. I mentioned the Garda part because I'd imagine that's what made me attractive to them when we encountered each other on that night out. Plenty drink involved.

pgj2015

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118895959#Comment_118895959

Had you crossed paths while you were working?

89897

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118895959#Comment_118895959

But you did say you had been dealing with them as a Guard?!

Also you mention touching is crossing the line, but how on earth did you find yourself in a position where theres a woman on each knee and one between your legs, surely you've crossed your own line in regards to respect in your relationship!

Potential-Monke

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118897651#Comment_118897651

Aye. But if a Garda is to exclude everyone they deal with as a potential friend at a future date, they'd be friendly with no one. My dealings with them were finished at this point. I was on a night out, and they recognised me and did what social people do. This happens quite often FYI. It's how a lot of people end up with a Garda as a partner. From my experience anyway. Don't bother trying to come at me with abusing my power (if that's the angle ye are taking), I wasn't. I had no interest but was just being friendly. I did once try using the "Garda card" to try and pull one night. The first woman I tried it on gave me a very honest and helpful feedback on it, and I never did it again. Most Gardai don't actually want people to know they're Guards.

As for how I ended up in that situation, drink. As far as I can recall (and as per accounts from people I was out with), I just decided to go with them at the end of the night (I usually ended up going home, alone, as herself lived 2 hours away at that point). I honestly believed it was the same as most nights where I ended up going to someones house, for more drink. I remember getting to the house, and sitting on the couch, then they sat on my knees and between my legs, and I did the manliest thing I've ever done. I starting crying telling them I couldn't do anything because I was with someone. They understood, left and I slept on the couch. Made them all breakfast in the morning. Couldn't sleep so walked to the shop and bought a fryup. One of them ended up with a colleague later on.

Looking back, I would have been angry with me. But I've had about 5% success with "pulling" up to that point. The girl I was with, to that point, was the last girl I had tried to get with, and it worked (thus the 5%), but she told me 3 years into the relationship that she had zero interest in me the night I kissed her, but she didn't want to lose face in front of her friends so kept at it. Then was horny so stayed with me, and eventually loved me. I honestly believed on the night above that I was just going for more drinks. As soon as I copped they started making moves, I stopped them. I'm not an Adonis, so the thought of something like this happening to me never crossed my mind as "could happen", and I'm terrible at reading people so I just assume women are not chatting me up, just being friendly.

cj maxx

I know it's not cheating, but an interesting programme on Ch 4 now , agroup of couples challenge monography, by exploring different relationships.

cj maxx

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118900886#Comment_118900886

Can't beat a bit of drawing to save a relationship

mikecope

Been with prostitutes while in relationships usually while away on business. It's not right but it's a lot more common than people realise.

TimeUp

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058238935/cheating

Did you tell him afterwards?

TimeUp

Gonna share a little story that's actually kinda taking place now.

Gay couple, we've been dating for around 4 years now. We've been living together for the most part of it, in France, but I lived in Ireland for some time, at the beginning, half of that time he was with me, then in 2020 I was doing a year-abroad program in a University outside of Europe.

We are mostly ok but some issues have arisen of late. One day, a month ago, I was horny and bf was not home. I downloaded a dating app and invited a random guy over.

When he arrives he looks around himself in a funny way and says "I've been here before", he asked me weather I'd moved in recently, cause he said he had had sex a few times with the guy that lived there before. I played it like it like he was thinking it and said yes I had moved in recently, cause I found the guy hot and really wanted to shag him no matter what.

After that we've met a few more times at his place and I'm starting to fall for him, and I've no idea where all of this is gonna take me.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118901636#Comment_118901636

Told him straight away once my friend told me what I'd done (I didn't remember due to a black out). I honestly don't know how people can lie to their partners face like that and still get on with their day

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118901641#Comment_118901641

So basically both of you are (or were) cheating with the same guy?

I'm genuinely curious, why are you still in a relationship with your bf?

Andrea B.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118901641#Comment_118901641

What are the chances? Was he the only other gay in the village?

That gave me a belly laugh!!

Jequ0n

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118902008#Comment_118902008

You keep going on about it like it’s the worst thing in the world. It really isn’t, so why don’t you just calm down eventually..

Mad_maxx

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118901641#Comment_118901641

Common knowledge that monogamy is almost a novelty in the gay community

Loafing Oaf

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118893328#Comment_118893328

You mean become a bit more 'gender fluid'?

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118902297#Comment_118902297

Someone asked me a question so I answered it so no i dont keep going on about it.

I was with this guy for years, when I found out he cheated on me, it broke my heart, I felt suicidal. And to actually find out the truth from other people rather than him was another stab in the chest. So apologies if it's not a barrel of laughs.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118902620#Comment_118902620

Life lesson to be learned there,never be so into someone,that you cant do without em

Lifes too short to be suicidal over poor actions of someone else

Potential-Monke

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118902297#Comment_118902297

Says the one who openly admits to cheating and intends to continue to do it. You've no care for anyone but yourself, as evidenced, so you saying it's not the worst thing in the world isn't worth anything tbh. Not having a go, you be you. Just another example of the selfishness of humanity.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118904774#Comment_118904774

Very true, first love and all that, definite life lesson learnt

Ruamann

I did it, I had it done to me, I'll never forgive myself or the other parties involved. I just don't bother with relationships at all anymore.

JupiterKid

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118902453#Comment_118902453

Actually, there are many gay male relationships that are monogamous FYI.

But many gay men also remain deeply committed partners/spouses and do have sex with other guys. As gay relationships don't have the cultural baggage of the religious-enforced stereotype of monogamous marriage for life, they are freer to adjust to the realities of the fact that most men - gay or straight - are not monogamous in nature and would have sex with several partners given the free choice.

And is there really anything wrong with that? An open relationship with defined rules and boundaries is surely better than cheating on one's spouse in a supposedly monogamous relationship.

Cheating is wrong on every level - when you make a vow to be completely faithful to one another, you stick to it or else end the relationship. But the reality is that cheating in relationships is very common and widespread - that doesn't make it right, it's just the nature of humanity.

Most scientific studies suggest that humans are not innately monogamous, but that the cultural pressure towards monogamy has many benefits for human societies.

Link:

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/are-we-biologically-inclined/

Real bang of inferred homophobia off your post.

Rikand

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118901641#Comment_118901641

3some

Greyfox

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118902620#Comment_118902620

Sorry to hear that. Cheating is a scumbag thing to do and when mixed with lying it can take years for someone to fully get over.