Ghosted after a few good dates

sassyj

raclle wrote: »

Would it help if sites implement an age verification?

Yes but they won't, same as with pics. Ultimately in it for traffic and users, so it suits them that users can put up fake ages and pics of various celebrities or stock pics . There are many ways that could improve user experience, eg you shouldn't be able to message someone muItiple times if they haven't responded once. Again, this suits them as keeps the deluded coming back.

SnuggyBear

partyguinness wrote: »

I went on a dinner date with this Polish lady circa 2006/2007.

She was effing nuts. The picture on her profile was clearly not her and she insisted on sitting beside me at the table. Who the eff goes on a dinner date and sits beside the date rather than face to face? well this crazy bird did because it was blatantly obvious that her profile pic was some one completely different. She was a bitter disappointment on the looks front compared to the pic.

She spent the whole time telling me about her campaign to make the life of the father of her 5 year old daughter (which she also kept from me) absolute hell. Dragging him in and out of Court every five minutes. I felt sorry for him as she was clearly very vindictive. She didnt even bad mouth him or say he was a bastard but she just enjoyed fcking with him. I was left with the distinct impression she got pregnant on purpose with some poor lad, ditched him, she ran rings around him and then proceeded to screw him for every penny. I just got pissed on two bottles of red wine to myself and left it at that.

Another Polish date was obsessed with learning Irish. She would literally pull out text books in her front room and want to start practising. That was sum total of our two "dates". One day she insisted we go to Easons and I would help her pick out a suitable Irish textbook which we then had to go back to her place to read.

Another Polish girl I actually met the old fashioned way (in a bar) was lying in my bed after a night of unprotcted sex. I walked in and she was making all sorts of yoga poses under the sheets. I asked her what she was doing and I quote "I am making Irish babies"...:eek: I ditched her at the airport PDQ back to Poland and blocked her number.

Another Polish girl was just so much hard work I just gave up.

Polish women are crazy in general. They can be good craic tbf but ive no idea what's going on in their heads.

Ubbquittious

I never knew lads lying about age was such a problem. Had one girl telling me i looked very young a few weeks back and I was like thx, you dont have to believe me if you dont want to, shur tis only a number! Then she started hesitating like feck when I wanted to meet up

YellowLead

Ubbquittious wrote: »

I never knew lads lying about age was such a problem. Had one girl telling me i looked very young a few weeks back and I was like thx, you dont have to believe me if you dont want to, shur tis only a number! Then she started hesitating like feck when I wanted to meet up

I had one case where I matched with a guy who said he was 35, as was I. After a few messages he told me he had a confession to make - he was only 30 but wanted ‘the older woman experience’ needless to say I was not impressed and did not meet him!
For me in general though it’s the other way the lies tend to go - guys in late 40s or early 50s pretending to be early 40s.

Ms. Newbie18

raclle wrote: »

I'm mid thirties

Was she way younger?

YellowLead

Ms. Newbie18 wrote: »

Was she way younger?

I think she was older

YellowLead

By the way there is an online dating forum for anybody who wants to join. It tends to be fairly quiet because it’s members only and locked down but if more people joined it could be improved...

https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2056968455/59/#post117094907

YellowLead

YellowLead wrote: »

By the way there is an online dating forum for anybody who wants to join. It tends to be fairly quiet because it’s members only and locked down but if more people joined it could be improved...

https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2056968455/59/#post117094907

Why is it locked down?

YellowLead

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Why is it locked down?

Indeed I asked - replies were in case users get PMs (though that happens on any forum) and also:
‘
You have to keep forums like this private otherwise they attract scam artists, pick up artists, and the generally undesirable.’

I think it’s a bad idea because nobody knows about it and it’s pretty quiet. And you could just moderate it like other forums. But anyway.

Ms. Newbie18

YellowLead wrote: »

By the way there is an online dating forum for anybody who wants to join. It tends to be fairly quiet because it’s members only and locked down but if more people joined it could be improved...

https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2056968455/59/#post117094907

Thanks! Sent a request.

sassyj

I think it's therapy I need after online dating, not a forum. Maybe I can write a book about all the nutjobs, stalkers and experiences Ive had lol.

YellowLead

Guy I went on a date with last night told me he went on a first date with a girl who was telling him about this teddy bear she lived with that was her friend - she changed it’s clothes (cardigans) every day. Her parents had teddies too and she showed him a pic of the teddies getting vaccinated....

Still - it’s good when crazies show their crazy early on!

Segotias

I found when I was online, I got messages from a good few 20 - 25 yo. I'm 43, a youngish looking 43 but not that young.

A few queried by age as they thought I was younger but it never bothered them as they were ultimately just looking for a hook up.

I found men my own age tended to look for younger if they did already have children and wanted them.

I'm also finding that women can dictate whether sex is happening whereas men tend to dictate whether it has potential for a relationship.

The woman the OP is dealing with sounds like an absolute melt. Wants attention or not on her terms and I would image expects the OP to be there at her whim. Cut losses on that one

partyguinness

Around 2006/2007 I was doing some ferocious damage with the online dating. I mean 2-3 different dates a week. Missed out on the whole swipe left/right gig. Became too much hard work- I was not looking for anything serous.

But anyway, I had 5 different Irish women on the go at one stage (all mid to late 20s) but rather strangely their fathers had passed away (each of them). I thought that was very peculiar.

YellowLead

partyguinness wrote: »

Around 2006/2007 I was doing some ferocious damage with the online dating. I mean 2-3 different dates a week. Missed out on the whole swipe left/right gig. Became too much hard work- I was not looking for anything serous.

But anyway, I had 5 different Irish women on the go at one stage (all mid to late 20s) but rather strangely their fathers had passed away (each of them). I thought that was very peculiar.

Well it depends - what age were you?

Ms. Newbie18

partyguinness wrote: »

But anyway, I had 5 different Irish women on the go at one stage (all mid to late 20s) but rather strangely their fathers had passed away (each of them). I thought that was very peculiar.

Where you giving off Paternal vibes ? people do like their kinks...:p

partyguinness

YellowLead wrote: »

Well it depends - what age were you?

Same age.

Ronaldinho

YellowLead wrote: »

Not if you go to the right bars

Recommend me some please!

bitofabind

YellowLead wrote: »

Guy I went on a date with last night told me he went on a first date with a girl who was telling him about this teddy bear she lived with that was her friend - she changed it’s clothes (cardigans) every day. Her parents had teddies too and she showed him a pic of the teddies getting vaccinated....

Still - it’s good when crazies show their crazy early on!

I used to love these stories when I was on the apps. I remember one lad told me he went on a date where he was "slotted into" a woman's busy schedule of dates one night, like literally given a time slot. "I'll squeeze you in from 7.30-9pm". He didn't question it for some reason, and ended up on an interview style date, "what's your 5 year plan, what's your salary range" ding ding ding 9pm time is up, never to be seen again.

Another lad told me about going on a date and the woman he thought he was talking to online was actually the way hotter friend of the woman that he met in real life, "my friend set this up for me, she knows I'm nervous about speaking to people online". Apparently she'd just come out of a relationship and hot friend was trying to encourage her to get back out there, posing as herself on the dating profile and then sending the friend in to meet the lad who'd been catfished into the date without knowing and hoping for the best I suppose.

My own weirdest experience was probably the lad who clearly was using photos that were 20+ years old, coz his online self was mid 20s, fit, tanned, gregarious, smiley, head full of hair and his real-life self was 40+, pale, overweight, bald and miserable. Stayed for a half hour before making my excuses, thought the lad clearly has issues, I'll say nothing, only to get a "don't think there's a connection" text from him the next morning. I was like "yeah, ya think??! Wonder why that is??!" :pac:

Nowt so queer as folk.

sassyj

bitofabind wrote: »

I used to love these stories when I was on the apps. I remember one lad told me he went on a date where he was "slotted into" a woman's busy schedule of dates one night, like literally given a time slot. "I'll squeeze you in from 7.30-9pm". He didn't question it for some reason, and ended up on an interview style date, "what's your 5 year plan, what's your salary range" ding ding ding 9pm time is up, never to be seen again.

Another lad told me about going on a date and the woman he thought he was talking to online was actually the way hotter friend of the woman that he met in real life, "my friend set this up for me, she knows I'm nervous about speaking to people online". Apparently she'd just come out of a relationship and hot friend was trying to encourage her to get back out there, posing as herself on the dating profile and then sending the friend in to meet the lad who'd been catfished into the date without knowing and hoping for the best I suppose.

My own weirdest experience was probably the lad who clearly was using photos that were 20+ years old, coz his online self was mid 20s, fit, tanned, gregarious, smiley, head full of hair and his real-life self was 40+, pale, overweight, bald and miserable. Stayed for a half hour before making my excuses, thought the lad clearly has issues, I'll say nothing, only to get a "don't think there's a connection" text from him the next morning. I was like "yeah, ya think??! Wonder why that is??!" :pac:

Nowt so queer as folk.

I went on a coffee date with a guy, he was not the chatty type (understatement) so I ended up carrying the conversation. He then said to me, is this is an interview, haha. I was only talking because he wouldn't. He texts me later than night and says great to meet you, really enjoyed the chats. I didn't respond.

For anyone looking for amusement, check out the socials of the dating apps, particularly POF. The lads asking why the messages aren't sending to people not realising their blocked, also the dark side of abuse some people get ( not amusing that part to be clear)

iebamm2580

sassyj wrote: »

I went on a coffee date with a guy, he was not the chatty type (understatement) so I ended up carrying the conversation. He then said to me, is this is an interview, haha. I was only talking because he wouldn't. He texts me later than night and says great to meet you, really enjoyed the chats. I didn't respond.

For anyone looking for amusement, check out the socials of the dating apps, particularly POF. The lads asking why the messages aren't sending to people not realising their blocked, also the dark side of abuse some people get ( not amusing that part to be clear)

Had the exact same situation with a girl, she literally asked nothing about me, i had to ask her all the questions and she just said to me, this is going nowhere if we cant hold a conversation. I just agreed and said goodluck.

Meathlass

YellowLead wrote: »

I had one case where I matched with a guy who said he was 35, as was I. After a few messages he told me he had a confession to make - he was only 30 but wanted ‘the older woman experience’ needless to say I was not impressed and did not meet him!
For me in general though it’s the other way the lies tend to go - guys in late 40s or early 50s pretending to be early 40s.

This is so common! I'm 41 and get matches from similarly aged men. At least once a week I get the "I have a confession, I'm actually in my early 30s but I want to have some fun with an older woman if you're interested". Lads, let me tell you that there is no greater turn off than being called an older woman!

Fuzzyduzzy

iebamm2580 wrote: »

Had the exact same situation with a girl, she literally asked nothing about me, i had to ask her all the questions and she just said to me, this is going nowhere if we cant hold a conversation. I just agreed and said goodluck.

I see it like tennis, if you're not getting questions back, closed statements (and no replies obviously) then the interest is just not there, leave it.

The worst are the messages from women you match with who just say: "hey". To me, that always felt like "right you have my brief attention, now impress me".

Ubbquittious

Fuzzyduzzy wrote: »

To me, that always felt like "right you have my brief attention, now impress me".

Yes they're like an upper-class British lady in the 19th Century off on her hollibobs in Greece with her spotless white dress and hat inside in her horse and carriage sampling a single grape from a market stall along the dusty streets

Ms. Newbie18

Re women setting up multiple dates in one night. Read this last month

https://www.thesun.ie/fabulous/6872527/man-shocked-woman-invites-people-date-love-island/

The balls it takes to do that

sassyj

Ms. Newbie18 wrote: »

Re women setting up multiple dates in one night. Read this last month

https://www.thesun.ie/fabulous/6872527/man-shocked-woman-invites-people-date-love-island/

The balls it takes to do that

Jesus the neck of her. UNHINGED you might say.



"The TikTok user said in a follow-up video that although he texted her after the bizarre date, the Hinge woman ghosted him."

What a complete gobsh@te. You can imagine the thread he'd start on Personal Issues ha

Ms. Newbie18

sassyj wrote: »

Jesus the neck of her. UNHINGED you might say.



"The TikTok user said in a follow-up video that although he texted her after the bizarre date, the Hinge woman ghosted him."

What a complete gobsh@te. You can imagine the thread he'd start on Personal Issues ha[/quoted

I can't believe he text her. I would have asked the lads I'd met there if they wanted to go for pints and met girls the old fashion way! Feck that!

Greyfox

Ms. Newbie18 wrote: »

Re women setting up multiple dates in one night. Read this last month

What a b*tch, if one of the lads had of thrown a drink over her she would of deserved it

kowloon

YellowLead wrote: »

That’s a bit broad to say women have all the power online! It is true if a woman wants something casual she can have her pick online. With little effort - she can have a date with a guy she finds attractive and sleep with him.

When it comes to wanting a relationship from online however - that’s a whole different ball game and in my opinion where if anyone has the advantage it’s men. Because there is a broader pool of women looking for a relationship than there is of men, so men have it easier. There are more men that are looking for hook ups but hiding it than women so women have to navigate through all of that faff if the eye are looking for a relationship.

Not trying to argue anything, but is there a source for that?

Lesalare

Meathlass wrote: »

This is so common! I'm 41 and get matches from similarly aged men. At least once a week I get the "I have a confession, I'm actually in my early 30s but I want to have some fun with an older woman if you're interested". Lads, let me tell you that there is no greater turn off than being called an older woman!

I found about 90% of blokes on Tinder lie about their age. Esp. in their late 40's.
It's so stupid because it's as obvious as dog's balls they are lying. Why bother?!