Ruining a wedding

SineadSpears

MyLove4Satan wrote: »

I traveled back from the USA in the late 80s for my bother's wedding. My brother was getting married at the Roadstone Club somewhere near Rathcoole. Anyway we all were put into a white Dublin Bus double decker and made our way though all the worst parts of Tallaght. People have no idea what a ****hole it was back then. The bus went through Traveller camps and litter all over the place with millions of plastic bags caught on hedgerows. It really looked like a Third World country. Pissing rain and miserable too. Kids throwing stones at the bus.

Anyway got to the reception and there are the men of the wedding party dressed in grey suits and top hats trying to look fancy. We sit down for the meal and it was - I **** you not - ham salad on paper plates with plastic knives and forks. Then a couple of hours of drinking and at one point some wagon on the dancefloor with a buggy (and a baby in it) and they all singing some Man United song. Right there and then I more or less disowned my family, my community and vowed never to go to another wedding. I also gave my brother a wedding present of 500 pounds which was huge money in the 1980s and he didn't even say thanks.

It was one of them, 'DNA is not the full story' experiences.

this is brilliant.

especially the bolded part. love it.

ontour2

from behind the bar...

At about 10.30pm a guest noticed that she had not seen her 6 year old daughter in a couple of hours, so she came to the bar, ordered a drink and asked if we has seen the girl. There were only five or six kids at the wedding and the others had gone to bed some time previously as a babysitter had been booked.
Search started with a few people looking around, then checking the rooms where the other kids had gone to bed, then a full search of the hotel, then a search of the grounds. By 12.30pm, most of the staff and a lot of the guests were involved in the search. The mother was hysterical and the entire focus was off the wedding party.
At 1am the bus driver arrived to take a group of guests home that were co-workers of the bride and had come for the 'afters'. As the group gathered up their coats from a bench behind their table, you will never guess who's six year old daughter had crawled in under the pile of coats and gone to sleep !!

CIP4

I almost ruined one once.

A good while ago at this point but I was the ring bearer at a wedding was around 7 years old I'd say. We had the rehearsals at the church a few days previous to the wedding and everything was gone through what to do and when, I suppose at my age the whole thing and being involved was a big deal. The big day came I was ready given the pillow with the two rings on it. But for some reason myself, the groom, groomsmen were at the church really early like two hours early and here was me with these rings tied to a pillow and this part was different to the rehearsals (the waiting around) and of course as any child would be like the pillow and rings and minding them was interesting to me for about 10 minutes at which time I just threw them somewhere outside the back of the church and went off playing around the church as you do.

A good bit of time past and I met with the best man and he asked me was I ready which I said I was. He asked me had I the rings at which point I had completely forgot where I put them. Christ there was some panic and running around looking for them. They were found before the bride came so all was good.

Looking back on in not sure why they gave the rings to a child so far in advance but I think everybody was a little stressed and nervous as you would be and just gave them to me and thought nothing of it.

freshpopcorn

Not really ruining a wedding but causing hassle for people.
There's a church and the sacristan was a lady who's daughter was a florist and if the couple didn't go to the her for their flowers.
The church wouldn't be opened on time for the day or rehearsals, the heating, lights, etc wouldn't be turned on. She loved causing hassle for you if you didn't go to her daughter for your flowers.

Toots

Yeah giving 2 wedding rings to a small child is something to be done in such a way that they're in the child's possession for the absolute minimum amount of time, not hours before the event :pac:

MyLove4Satan

I was talking to a Muslim guy at work and he was telling me in certain parts of the Islamic world it is believed that some women become literally possessed by their wedding day. This is why they have certain social and cultural rituals around the bride's nuptials to prevent the bride from going insane. Certainly makes a lot of sense when you hear about these Bridezilla stories of otherwise normal women who literally become vicious psychopaths as soon as the engagement ring is on their finger.

At some level I have often wondered if some women actually want their wedding day ruined as it feeds their need for drama?

ontour2

from behind the bar....

first unlucky bride was the staff wedding nightmare. Young waitress with tray of drink drops it on brides wedding dress. Full comedy round of drinks, Guinness, red wine, Coca Cola and even a snowball for granny. Waitress starts crying as does two of her friends as we start pouring countless bottles of soda water over the bride to flush the stains.

Separate wedding, the bride stood beside an ornate fireplace for photo. Train of dress/ headdress caught fire and burnt in a second leaving a black residue on back of dress.

Both were memorable as they should have ruined the wedding, especially as they happened early in the day. However both brides were the soundest people you would ever meet and realised that it was their reaction that was more likely to ruin the day. One rocked on with a new multi-colour wedding dress and the other with a black stripe with a mild smell of burnt plastic. Best brides ever!

Purple Mountain

Ontour start your own thread

ontour2

ontour2 wrote: »

from behind the bar....

first unlucky bride was the staff wedding nightmare. Young waitress with tray of drink drops it on brides wedding dress. Full comedy round of drinks, Guinness, red wine, Coca Cola and even a snowball for granny. Waitress starts crying as does two of her friends as we start pouring countless bottles of soda water over the bride to flush the stains.

Separate wedding, the bride stood beside an ornate fireplace for photo. Train of dress/ headdress caught fire and burnt in a second leaving a black residue on back of dress.

Both were memorable as they should have ruined the wedding, especially as they happened early in the day. However both brides were the soundest people you would ever meet and realised that it was their reaction that was more likely to ruin the day. One rocked on with a new multi-colour wedding dress and the other with a black stripe with a mild smell of burnt plastic. Best brides ever!

Purple Mountain wrote: »

Ontour start your own thread

More like soon to be 'available in all good book stores.'

HildaOgdenx

HildaOgdenx wrote: »

So no one told you life was gonna be this way...

*applause*

Plazaman

Temporarily ruined for myself as a guest. I was at a wedding in the States where the reception was held in a community hall above a fire station. During the meal the alarm goes off for a emergency call so myself and another Irish lad at my table decide to run outside like children to see the fire engines take off. It was only the ambulance that left the station and it looped around and came up the driveway to the hall and stopped right outside the door beside us. Inside the porch was an elderly gentleman who felt ill, drove up to the station and hit the call button. Us two paddies ran straight by him without noticing him lying on the bench.
Other guests heard the commotion and came out to see the poor auld fella getting a couple of zaps of the defibrillator and him taken away in the ambulance. The first thing we got asked then by a couple of large US ladies was what did we do to the gentleman, did we hit him? The stereotype of the fighting Irish was strong and accusations were made. Despite us telling the story of what happened, for the next few hours we got dirty looks and people talking behind our backs about being troublemakers.
Later in the evening one of the firemen that worked on the auld fella came in to tell us the man was OK and to thank myself and the other lad for helping him and calling the ambulance. He shook hands with us and left. We went from being villans to heroes even though we did absolutely nothing. We said nothing though and enjoyed the drinks being bought for us for the rest of the night.

partyguinness

monkeysnapper wrote: »

Yeh I agree..... im originally from Wales and weddings are as dry and boring and over by midnight...... when my girlfriend ( wife now) went to our 1st wedding last orders were at 11 30pm and all finished at midnight ....

Our next wedding the food was bacon sandwiches and we had to drive an hour and half to reception in middle of knowwhere and a few hours later all over and drive back .... no accommodation....


Soooooo when all my friends/family came over to Ireland for our wedding they were absolutely astonished when we were still partying at 4am and party next day started 6pm till 4am the night after.

I did warn the Mrs that the presents would be very stingy but still managed to offend her no end to the 30euros in card .... one of my groomsmen put 10 euros in card....

Thats how you do it you dry bastards!!!!!

Yeah. Gifts from the English will be very tight...if you even get anything at all. In fact the convention is just to cover the cost of the meal which will be take at £40.00 or perhaps a botle of Cava.

In fact I just remembered I have been invited to the afters of wedding this July. Bit surprised really as I don't know them that well.

It's on a Thursday evening in the effing middle of nowhere.

Ash.J.Williams

I was at an English wedding of a colleague and 2 of us flew over , without even doing anything or being big headed posting this we became the maddest bastards there to the point it felt like we were a zoo exhibit. I’m not much of a drinker and after my 3rd bitter I had a whiskey coz bitter is ****e. Next morning I met the father if the groom in the lift and he was all “heard you were on the whiskey last night “ as if that was the maddest part of the night .


Oh yeah and an uncle of the groom wanted to come over here to play golf one of his mates is a Protestant and he wondered would that be ok

Sebastian Dangerfield

Ash.J.Williams wrote: »

I was at an English wedding of a colleague and 2 of us flew over , without even doing anything or being big headed posting this we became the maddest bastards there to the point it felt like we were a zoo exhibit. I’m not much of a drinker and after my 3rd bitter I had a whiskey coz bitter is ****e. Next morning I met the father if the groom in the lift and he was all “heard you were on the whiskey last night “ as if that was the maddest part of the night .

It's funny to see how the Irish react at English weddings. I was at a wedding in the Lake District - walked into the function room the day before and saw a bar slightly larger than a phone box - two beer taps, few optics and a small fridge with bottles. I said to the person next to me "they've never served an Irish wedding with that bar". One by one as the paddies arrived, people would look at the bar and say "they're going to be under serious pressure tomorrow" or words to the same effect - everyone was doing the same reconnaissance trip in advance of the serious business ahead. I reckon the bar man was fit to scream with all the advice he was given about 2 hours in.

Another one was in a country estate in the midlands, and much more generous (the brides father was Irish, which probably helped). We're all hitting our stride at around 11pm, when the lights come on and people start to leave. All the Irish sit down waiting to be directed to "the other bar". When told there was none, after the outrage had cleared, we got the yellow pages and started ringing around pubs in the locality offering large sums of cash to any bar who would open the side door for a large group of thirsty punters, but alas none took us up on it. About 20 of us ended up back in my aunts house drinking warm white wine out of a plastic beaker.

I was working at a wedding when I was 17 or 18, going table to table pouring wine. I'd a skip of beer the night before so my hands were shaking like a leaf. I could only pour with my right hand, so depending on whether they wanted red or white I was having to switch. One smartar$e says to me "you've an awful shake in your hands". I replied "yeah, t'was a long night". He says "Oh yeah? Which hand were you using?" to guffaws from the whole table for the rest of the night. It made their day, didn't do much for mine...

ontour2

From behind the bar.....

Small wedding of 70 people which is incredibly boring for the staff, give me 300 heavy drinkers 4 deep at the bar any night!

Anyway, wedding meal and speeches finished and roll on the insufferable two hours until the band starts up. Nice sunny day so some guests head to the garden, some to other bars in the hotel, nothing unusual there. 9pm rolls on and no sign of a band or DJ and only about a dozen people in the function room. 10pm rolls on and still no sign of entertainment and we soon realise there is no sign of the wedding party either, only the dozen or so in the function room. We reckoned they were probably in a local pub so headed out for a look around, even managed to get a pint in while we did our investigation.

Long and short of it was that the wedding party had done a runner. Most of the guests must have been in on it but some of the relatives were obviously not included in the plan as they were still drinking in the hotel, some were even booked in for the night.

As luck would have it, the best man was given a leather pouch with a combination lock to put the wedding envelopes in. This he duly did and locked it but never handed it in to the office. Guessing he just planned to take it with him. Unfortunately for him, a diligent manager in the hotel spotted the locked pouch on a table so took it and put it in the safe.

Next morning they obviously realised they had left the wedding envelopes behind and with some brass neck, sent the best man in to the hotel at 9am to get them. He said that there would be someone in later in the day to pay the bill. He was duly told that there was more than enough cash in the pouch to cover the cost of the wedding and that if they did not pay the bill we would take legal action to keep all the money.

He made a few threats and headed off, 30 minutes later he was back with cash and paid the bill. He was then shown the pouch which had never been opened, took the envelopes and left. Unfortunately I have no idea how much was actually in the wedding envelopes but I am fairly sure they would not have paid for a round of drinks, let alone the meal bill!

pgj2015

partyguinness wrote: »

Yeah. Gifts from the English will be very tight...if you even get anything at all. In fact the convention is just to cover the cost of the meal which will be take at £40.00 or perhaps a botle of Cava.

In fact I just remembered I have been invited to the afters of wedding this July. Bit surprised really as I don't know them that well.

It's on a Thursday evening in the effing middle of nowhere.

They might have asked you because you are Irish? better gift or cash sum from Irish people as you said.

Pawwed Rig

Slightly off point but it is fairly insulting to be invited to an 'afters' imo.


Yeah we would like you to come to our wedding as long as it doesn't cost us anything and sure bring a gift with you.

cml387

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

Slightly off point but it is fairly insulting to be invited to an 'afters' imo.


Yeah we would like you to come to our wedding as long as it doesn't cost us anything and sure bring a gift with you.

Not a disaster of the same scale as some on here, but a girl at work many years ago decided to have a small wedding but invite all her friends to the afters, which included us (maybe she couldn't afford it..dunno). Anyway a bus had been organised to bring the crowd from a nearby town, but apperently the bus never showed up, allegedly. In a big funtion room there were about twenty guests and a lot of sandwiches.

Ginger83

ontour2 wrote: »

From behind the bar.....

Small wedding of 70 people which is incredibly boring for the staff, give me 300 heavy drinkers 4 deep at the bar any night!

Anyway, wedding meal and speeches finished and roll on the insufferable two hours until the band starts up. Nice sunny day so some guests head to the garden, some to other bars in the hotel, nothing unusual there. 9pm rolls on and no sign of a band or DJ and only about a dozen people in the function room. 10pm rolls on and still no sign of entertainment and we soon realise there is no sign of the wedding party either, only the dozen or so in the function room. We reckoned they were probably in a local pub so headed out for a look around, even managed to get a pint in while we did our investigation.

Long and short of it was that the wedding party had done a runner. Most of the guests must have been in on it but some of the relatives were obviously not included in the plan as they were still drinking in the hotel, some were even booked in for the night.

As luck would have it, the best man was given a leather pouch with a combination lock to put the wedding envelopes in. This he duly did and locked it but never handed it in to the office. Guessing he just planned to take it with him. Unfortunately for him, a diligent manager in the hotel spotted the locked pouch on a table so took it and put it in the safe.

Next morning they obviously realised they had left the wedding envelopes behind and with some brass neck, sent the best man in to the hotel at 9am to get them. He said that there would be someone in later in the day to pay the bill. He was duly told that there was more than enough cash in the pouch to cover the cost of the wedding and that if they did not pay the bill we would take legal action to keep all the money.

He made a few threats and headed off, 30 minutes later he was back with cash and paid the bill. He was then shown the pouch which had never been opened, took the envelopes and left. Unfortunately I have no idea how much was actually in the wedding envelopes but I am fairly sure they would not have paid for a round of drinks, let alone the meal bill!

Wow some people have no shame.

Ash.J.Williams

Sebastian Dangerfield wrote: »

It's funny to see how the Irish react at English weddings. I was at a wedding in the Lake District - walked into the function room the day before and saw a bar slightly larger than a phone box - two beer taps, few optics and a small fridge with bottles. I said to the person next to me "they've never served an Irish wedding with that bar". One by one as the paddies arrived, people would look at the bar and say "they're going to be under serious pressure tomorrow" or words to the same effect - everyone was doing the same reconnaissance trip in advance of the serious business ahead. I reckon the bar man was fit to scream with all the advice he was given about 2 hours in.

Another one was in a country estate in the midlands, and much more generous (the brides father was Irish, which probably helped). We're all hitting our stride at around 11pm, when the lights come on and people start to leave. All the Irish sit down waiting to be directed to "the other bar". When told there was none, after the outrage had cleared, we got the yellow pages and started ringing around pubs in the locality offering large sums of cash to any bar who would open the side door for a large group of thirsty punters, but alas none took us up on it. About 20 of us ended up back in my aunts house drinking warm white wine out of a plastic beaker.

I was working at a wedding when I was 17 or 18, going table to table pouring wine. I'd a skip of beer the night before so my hands were shaking like a leaf. I could only pour with my right hand, so depending on whether they wanted red or white I was having to switch. One smartar$e says to me "you've an awful shake in your hands". I replied "yeah, t'was a long night". He says "Oh yeah? Which hand were you using?" to guffaws from the whole table for the rest of the night. It made their day, didn't do much for mine...

Yeah a mate was marrying a Dutch girl and was planning the proceedings with her father and he mentioned the free bar like it was nothing and my mate was shocked and was all “no no no no “ her father still didn’t grasp the danger he was in with paddy’s arriving

Toots

Ash.J.Williams wrote: »

Yeah a mate was marrying a Dutch girl and was planning the proceedings with her father and he mentioned the free bar like it was nothing and my mate was shocked and was all “no no no no “ her father still didn’t grasp the danger he was in with paddy’s arriving

A friend of mine had her wedding in Spain in a venue that had never hosted an Irish wedding before. Open bar was part of the package and she had tried to warn them but I think it got lost in translation. Apparently they just about had enough drink in the venue but she described the bar staff as looking "a bit shellshocked" the next day :pac:

partyguinness

pgj2015 wrote: »

They might have asked you because you are Irish? better gift or cash sum from Irish people as you said.

No chance. When in Rome and all that...bottle of bubbly and the honour of my presence is more than enough.

ontour2

From behind the bar.....

Wedding party got to hotel at about 2.30 and were brought to the garden for photos. Groom appears to have confused the instructions for the stag party with the instructions for the wedding day. He decided that climbing a tree would make a great wedding photo. Before his family had completed their first roar at him to get down, he had fallen out of the tree and broken his arm.

Off to hospital he went and the meal started without him. He made it back in time for dessert and speeches. Usually the best man's speech embarrasses the groom however in this case everyone was focused on the fact the the bride was cutting up the grooms dinner and he was devouring it as fast as she was cutting it. I am not sure she was even surprised by what was happening!

He was always known as a bit of a messer but cemented that reputation in permanent marker that day.

partyguinness

partyguinness wrote: »

No chance. When in Rome and all that...bottle of bubbly and the honour of my presence is more than enough.

As long as you're happy to bring shame on the ENTIRE nation

Yeah_Right

Went t wedding a few years back, he was a kiwi and she was Irish from a very conservative family. Very conservative. The MC for the speeches was one of the kiwi groomsmen. He gave everyone the running order when we all sat down for the meal and introduced the speakers.

The MC was a very funny and witty guy but he read the room badly. As he introduced the best man and the groom he told stories about them that involved women with large breasts, condoms hidden in cakes and public nudity. When he introduced the father of the bride, he didn't really know the guy so he went with a long elaborate joke about smelly vaginas.

This was all met with deathly silence and shocked looks from the 100 plus guests apart from 3 tables of kiwis and Aussies who were wetting themselves laughing. The bride was furious and had to be restrained by the groom from taking the mic off the MC. To this day, she hasn't forgiven the him. Any time we see her at a wedding or wedding talk comes up around her, one of us mentions the performance just to watch her lose her **** again.

piplip87

I kinda ruined a wedding. Not my fault but a friend of mine threw 5 yokes into my drink, I was off my head made a pure show of myself. Needless to say he is not a friend anymore.

Gorgonzaga

Can't say I've ever seen a wedding ruined. I've seen people get pretty drunk, but it didn't really affect anything. I've never anyone object during the ceremony, but that would certainly put a damper on things!

PhilOssophy

I am yet again asking myself what sort of boring fcks I call friends - I have never witnessed any such carnage at any of my friends weddings, or family weddings.
I need some new friends clearly

Pawwed Rig

piplip87 wrote: »

I kinda ruined a wedding. Not my fault but a friend of mine threw 5 yokes into my drink, I was off my head made a pure show of myself. Needless to say he is not a friend anymore.

What are yokes?

Atlantic Dawn

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

What are yokes?

Ecstasy tablets.