Boards unfettered sexism (See Mod Note in first post)

pwurple

https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2058072151

This thread linked, case in point.

Do any other women here find boards to be toxic when it comes to sexism and how it is tolerated / encouraged?

That thread is running for months. Containing gems like ranking whether asses , tits or face are looked at first while passing random women in the street. What parts of women's vulva can be seen in what clothes etc.



Rape culture alive and well?

Mod note: Please read mod note here before posting: https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=116268826&postcount=60

rapul

Wow, I feel sorry for any young lads growing up with this ****e being spewed, works both ways, but men bad same sheet different day, and rape culture is ****ing disgraceful to say, but that's the world we live in now cause not just men but young boys bad. Madness

meeeeh

I'm not sure it's rape culture. It's making themselves feel better putting others down.

Something I noticed when younger. Men who were the most critical were the ones who were the most afraid to approach women.

That being said Boards is safe heaven for especially but not exclusively men with all sorts of frustrations. It could be women, liberals, refugees, EU, Muslims...

lucalux

pwurple wrote: »

https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2058072151

This thread linked, case in point.

Do any other women here find boards to be toxic when it comes to sexism and how it is tolerated / encouraged?

That thread is running for months. Containing gems like ranking whether asses , tits or face are looked at first while passing random women in the street. What parts of women's vulva can be seen in what clothes etc.



Rape culture alive and well?

I'm not going to say that boards is a healthy place for equality at all times, but I would have an issue with equating men having a look at women they find attractive, and 'rape culture'.

I'm not saying there's no link between them, you'll have leery guys who would be happy to have more than a look, but having a look is not close to threatening or damaging behaviour. It's human nature, hard wired for reproduction.

Women do it too, find men attractive.

In that same thread there's an exchange about grey tracksuit bottoms, have a look online for the randy women lusting after men in grey sweatpants to see what I mean!

Other than that, yes, I find boards can attract people who hold misogynistic or racist or "whatever negative you like" views.
There can be misandrist views on here too, but I'd say there's a majority of men compared to women on here, which would skew things.

cannotlogin

I think there's a huge amount of sexism of boards and largely goes unchecked because the majority of users are male.

I've often considered closing my account because of it & probably will the next times there's a sexist thread that isn't addressed.

The thread 're Helen McEntee's pregnancy was terrible and warnings rather than bans were handed out. https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2058138549/1

The fact *modsnip* and *modsnip* are allowed to continue posting just proves it will never be addressed.

That said, I think it's miles away from rape culture.

I'm far more likely to get carded or banned for this post than any sexist posters.

I haven't seen anything insulting there. A bit juvenile, but so what.

pwurple

Deleted User wrote: »

I haven't seen anything insulting there. A bit juvenile, but so what.

Well, rape culture is where society has particular attitudes about gender and sexuality. Sexual objectivisation being seen as completely normal is an example of this.


lucalux, that thread about Helen McEntee was shocking. I genuinely couldn't go in there and read the avalanche of vitriol in there from a certain point in. Some parts of it were even slut-shaming her, a married pregnant minister. Talking about rub of the relic etc. How pregnant women shouldn't have a job. Things that women in Ireland have fought long and hard for. All tolerated and normalised.


meeeeh, Boards is safe haven for men... this so true. and made me think, is it a safe haven for women? Is it a safe haven for lgbt+? The most active female boards are private boards, invite only, behind closed doors. Why is that?

meeeeh

pwurple wrote: »

meeeeh, Boards is safe haven for men... this so true. and made me think, is it a safe haven for women? Is it a safe haven for lgbt+? The most active female boards are private boards, invite only, behind closed doors. Why is that?

I think different social media channels attract different people. FB is for over 60ies, Twitter probably snowflakes and boards attracts angry men whose social standing diminished in comparison to other groups in society.

OK above is tongue in cheek and huge generalisation but I bet if anyone analysed posting on boards it would show that a lot of other groups moved on to different platforms. The group that seems to be dominant or at least most aggressive is accommodated because it keeps subscriber numbers up.

nightie

I happened upon that thread last night and fair play to the poster anewme for calling posters out on it. I’m too much of a mouse to raise more than a squeak.

Caranica

There's fora on here that I love and fora that I avoid like the plague. After Hours being top of the latter list. Yet still it's impossible to avoid certain types, they tend to post on anything on the front page so pop up in here, in PI and elsewhere.

Being a mod is a thankless job, I did it in a former life and that was on a relatively civilised forum, my heart truly goes out to the mods on the more "lively" fora.

I do agree that some stuff that is allowed to remain is unacceptable, but find it best for my head to just avoid it.

jpharvey

We are all Jackie Weaver.

greenspurs

cannotlogin wrote: »

I think there's a huge amount of sexism of boards and largely goes unchecked because the majority of users are male.

I've often considered closing my account because of it & probably will the next times there's a sexist thread that isn't addressed.

The thread 're Helen McEntee's pregnancy was terrible and warnings rather than bans were handed out. https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2058138549/1

The fact *modsnip* are allowed to continue posting just proves it will never be addressed.

That said, I think it's miles away from rape culture.

I'm far more likely to get carded or banned for this post than any sexist posters.

That is a disgraceful post !!!!

:eek: :eek:

greenspurs

pwurple wrote: »

Well, rape culture is where society has particular attitudes about gender and sexuality. Sexual objectivisation being seen as completely normal is an example of this.

So men, lusting after women is "sexual objectivisation" ? ok. Also women can view men in the same way.

So that makes it a 'rape culture' ?? :rolleyes:

You do know that men have lusted after females since day 1 ?
Nowadays theres places (for better or worse) for men to put these thoughts into writing. Okay, some men go a bit far, but most of it is schoolboy stupid stuff.

Just because these places didnt exist 20-30-40 years ago , doesnt mean men back then didnt view women sexually !
Or is rape culture only in place with the advent of social media ?
Or has the 'rape culture' become an over sensationalised reaction to mens thought on social media?

meeeeh

You always know somebody is excited when they start using term females instead of women.

BTW my dog is not overly impressed that men are lusting after her. She told me that she'd prefer if you'd stick to women.

I'm not sure about rape culture but there does seem to be a cohort of male posters with some issues with women that aren't hidden nearly as well as they think.

The insults thread interested me with the sheer number of sexually based insults aimed at women. AH isn't even the worst forum for sexism, but I don't even look at the worst one anymore.

Feisar

Calling idiots on the internet talking about women’s body parts “rape culture” weakens the term. Look up those gangs in the UK for what rape culture means.

pwurple

Here are a couple of quotes from the thread about women's running gear.

It exaggerates folds, so more ass crack and camel toe.

The best thing about having to queue into places more often than before now is when your behind some woman in the aforementioned leggings with a perfectly-sculpted ass.

And here is today's news about a female runner sexually assaulted in Coolock.
https://www.rte.ie/news/2021/0211/1196477-courts-sexual-assult/

But I'm imagining it, right?


(Don't bother telling me all women should self-impose a curfew. k thanks.)

Airyfairy12

I think certain men lack empathy and understanding. Its been ingrained into them for centuries that theyre better than women & women are either property, commodities or mothers and either way womens soul purpose is to serve men's needs.
Now when women collectively express anger/frustration at men for how they speak about us or behave towards us, they dismiss us and continue talking/behaving how ever they want because they dont care that it hurts us. All that matters to them is themselves and other men. Women only matter to them in terms of what we can do for them so our thoughts, opinions, feelings dont matter as far as theyre concerned.

rapul

Some ridiculous comments here, everyone is the same so clearly one size fits all, disgraceful.
Just because men don't air what women do as much because what is it women say to men, man up etc...
Disgraceful posts.
Alot of scorned folk here.

Perhaps hard to have any empathy when we're guilty before even hitting puberty now these days it seems.

anewme

meeeeh wrote: »

You always know somebody is excited when they start using term females instead of women.

.

This.

I largely stopped posting to boards due to the woman hating being tolerated and in some cases condoned .

Every day there was a .....why do women....why are women....why are fat Women....usually followed by some gross sexist generalisation.

The thread about Women’s fashions saw a women referred to as “A Pig In Yoga Pants”. The views of that poster were supported by others, it came across that fat women have no value and should not wear clothes that insult men’s eyes.

I will say that mods acted quickly and asked that poster not to post again in that thread.

More actions need to be taken though.

If the poison core of posters think a women is objecting, they turn up and try and round on the person and accuse them of being a blue haired feminist, blah blah blah. I’ve seen posters bullied off.

Id also say that it would appear to me that not everyone posting in boards as a man is a man or a women is a woman, hey, you can assume any identity you want as it’s not real life.

Glad to see some others feel the same.

anewme

rapul wrote: »

Some ridiculous comments here, everyone is the same so clearly one size fits all, disgraceful.
Just because men don't air what women do as much because what is it women say to men, man up etc...
Disgraceful posts.
Alot of scorned folk here.

Perhaps hard to have any empathy when we're guilty before even hitting puberty now these days it seems.

I believe you supported the views of the poster calling a woman A Pig in Yoga pants.

Certainly, you liked this comment.below from that toxic poster.

Fashionable or not, fat girls should wear sackcloth in public if the only other thing they have is yoga pants.

Perhaps your views are actually part of the problem being discussed here?

fits

I just don’t have the energy for it.

Fair play to those of you battling it but I just can’t.

anewme

fits wrote: »

I just don’t have the energy for it.

Fair play to those of you battling it but I just can’t.

I think this is the real issue.

It is a waste of positive energy,

I don’t post much in Boards due to the same. There are nicer forums so it is easier to stick to them, food, gardening, animals, where it’s not about men v women.

What happens often if a poster with strong views comes along, they are rounded on, goaded, get frustrated and say something and end up getting banned. Then the toxic posters are happy, trundling along.

I suppose you have to think that anonymous keyboard warriors are everywhere. They express these views here, because they would not be strong enough to express them in real life.

It’s still good to see this thread being raised though and that others see it.

GingerLily

The amount of sexist posts I come across regularly on this site is just so frustrating.

I can ignore the objectification threads, at least they're meant to be stupid, but it's the other stuff that really worries me.

So many forums aren't friendly to women on here unless you denounce feminism, metoo and all victims of sexual violence (*up until the moment of conviction, because an assault only ever happens when it's paired with a conviction).

My husband gets annoyed at me at this stage if stray into any of the problematic forums, because I will get mad and it inevitably puts me in a bad mood.

Guerillabear

pwurple wrote: »

Well, rape culture is where society has particular attitudes about gender and sexuality. Sexual objectivisation being seen as completely normal is an example of this.


lucalux, that thread about Helen McEntee was shocking. I genuinely couldn't go in there and read the avalanche of vitriol in there from a certain point in. Some parts of it were even slut-shaming her, a married pregnant minister. Talking about rub of the relic etc. How pregnant women shouldn't have a job. Things that women in Ireland have fought long and hard for. All tolerated and normalised.


meeeeh, Boards is safe haven for men... this so true. and made me think, is it a safe haven for women? Is it a safe haven for lgbt+? The most active female boards are private boards, invite only, behind closed doors. Why is that?

If you don’t like a thread, don’t join it. There are plenty of upper middle class twats who post on this who I would never engage with on this because they are so up their own hole and I know they are too stubborn to even try replying to.

Every thread does not have to be a safe haven for delicate flowers like you who throw severely inflammatory concepts like “rape culture” into something that is miles from it.

cannotlogin

Can I ask why the names were deleted from my post?

If certain posters are allowed post offensive content, why can I not call them out on it?

This is part of the problem, their posts should be edited, not mine.

anewme

cannotlogin wrote: »

Can I ask why the names were deleted from my post?

If certain posters are allowed post offensive content, why can I not call them out on it?

This is part of the problem, their posts should be edited, not mine.

Elephant in The Room.

I haven’t seen the post when you had the names in it.

But I wouldn’t have to be Einstein to tell you who they were.

Annasopra

pwurple wrote: »

is it a safe haven for women? Is it a safe haven for lgbt+? The most active female boards are private boards, invite only, behind closed doors. Why is that?

Its kind of ok for lgb people though you do get a bit of homophobia, lesbophobia, biphobia. For trans people its toxic and a lot of extreme hateful transphobia. As for black and ethnic minotities or religious minorities agsin a lot of hateful racism and sectarianism.

rapul

anewme wrote: »

I believe you supported the views of the poster calling a woman A Pig in Yoga pants.

Certainly, you liked this comment.below from that toxic poster.

Fashionable or not, fat girls should wear sackcloth in public if the only other thing they have is yoga pants.

Perhaps you are actually part of the problem being discussed here?

Attack the post not the poster, but sure attack me all you want that's your normal style.

And no I don't support that kind of posting, point out to me where I did and correct me if I'm wrong but back off on the attack there yeah.
I may have liked some posts in that thread but I don't recall which, but I'm aware of who made the worst comments in that thread and would be 50/50 but that comment you quoted is horrible.

So less of attacking me please.
Just cause man bad and I don't agree with all you and your patting on the back here

Just to say that posters comments were very long so perhaps I may have liked part of one or two, anyway I'm out, this is just a ridiculous thread

cee_jay

rapul wrote: »

Attack the post not the poster, but sure attack me all you want that's your normal style.

And no I don't support that kind of posting, point out to me where I did and correct me if I'm wrong but back off on the attack there yeah.
I may have liked some posts in that thread but I don't recall which, but I'm aware of who made the worst comments in that thread and would be 50/50 but that comment you quoted is horrible.

So less of attacking me please.
Just cause man bad and I don't agree with all you and your patting on the back here

Just to say that posters comments were very long so perhaps I may have liked part of one or two, anyway I'm out, this is just a ridiculous thread

Here you go.
Just so you are aware, women don't dress for your eyes. I hadn't read that thread, and only did so this morning. This was just one post of many I'm sure because I didnt last long reading that sh*te.

rapul

Actually no I don't, that comment is hilarious and that's why I liked it, lighten up haha

Annasopra

rapul wrote: »

And I stand corrected then and apologise for what it's worth not that I have to, yous are just as bad ganging up on me at the moment tbh, goodluck

A half hearted non apology apology followed by equating sexism with highlighting sexism. Joke.

rapul

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

A half hearted non apology apology followed by equating sexism with highlighting sexism. Joke.

Nah mate it's hilarious **** it!

anewme

rapul wrote: »

Actually no I don't, that comment is hilarious and that's why I liked it, lighten up haha

Indeed.

Exactly why this thread is needed unfortunately.

The mask slips very easily.

rapul

anewme wrote: »

Indeed.

Exactly why this thread is posted.

The mask slips very easily.

No mask it's hilarious, I stand by it.

Maybe your the problem as u said to me

Annasopra

rapul wrote: »

No mask it's hilarious, I stand by it.

Maybe your the problem as u said to me

But you are the one laughingly supporting sexism.

rapul

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

But you are the one laughingly supporting sexism.

No, it's such a ridiculous comment it's clearly a joke, look whatever I'm the boogie man here but I'm done this is going nowhere

anewme

rapul wrote: »

No, it's such a ridiculous comment it's clearly a joke, look whatever I'm the boogie man here but I'm done this is going nowhere

On the page before, you said it was a horrible comment and now it’s hilarious?

At least be consistent.

The hole you are digging for yourself is just getting deeper.

cee_jay

rapul wrote: »

No, it's such a ridiculous comment it's clearly a joke, look whatever I'm the boogie man here but I'm done this is going nowhere

No it's not clearly a joke. These are comments that women get on the regular, have to read on boards and other internet sites on the regular, and they aren't jokes. It is sexism pure and simple. They are so far from being a joke - they are toxic.

rapul

Here because you keep attacking me, **** off
Worth it.

joe40

rapul wrote: »

Here because you keep attacking me, **** off
Worth it.

I don't actually see anyone attacking you, just expressing a different opinion. Is that not allowed.

pwurple

pwurple wrote: »

Well, rape culture is where society has particular attitudes about gender and sexuality. Sexual objectivisation being seen as completely normal is an example of this.

https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2055192287/1

Women sexually objectify people too.

It has nothing to do with “rape culture” - I agree with a lot of what’s been said here but honestly you really cheapen your argument by trying to associate it with rape.

Faith

CMod Note: Rapul, don't post on this thread again.

A reminder to all to play the ball, not the person. Personal attacks will not be tolerated.

Faith

Mod note: cee_jay, I've just deleted your post, FYI, as Rapul is now thread-banned and can't reply to your questions. I thought it was fairer to remove it than leave it there.

cannotlogin

Can I ask again why were the names edited from my post? Every other mod action taken has been commented on but not that one?

One of the posters named regularly starts threads which are offensive to women and their posts are left unedited.

If it's considered a personal attack, which it isn't, it's about the content of their posts, they regularly issue personal attacks on women ...where it the distinction?

Guerillabear

cee_jay wrote: »

No it's not clearly a joke. These are comments that women get on the regular, have to read on boards and other internet sites on the regular, and they aren't jokes. It is sexism pure and simple. They are so far from being a joke - they are toxic.

I read the comment, which is in poor taste, but so obviously a joke. The chap clearly had an audience that appreciated the joke, so who are we to decide that no-one should laugh at it?

We all have different temperaments and tolerances - the trick is to not make it everyone else’s problem when one of your lines are crossed.

I’m sure there are plenty of things that you find funny that others would find offensive.

Just log off.

anewme

Guerillabear wrote: »

I read the comment, which is in poor taste, but so obviously a joke. The chap clearly had an audience that appreciated the joke, so who are we to decide that no-one should laugh at it?

We all have different temperaments and tolerances - the trick is to not make it everyone else’s problem when one of your lines are crossed.

I’m sure there are plenty of things that you find funny that others would find offensive.

Just log off.

That is gaslighting.

It was not a joke.

It followed on from previous posts calling larger women A Pig In Yoga Pants. long posts, nasty and unacceptable. Toxic behaviour, which has been tolerated on boards for too long now.

Please don’t defend sexism.

Same as bullying. Usually when bullies are called out, they say it was a joke.

That’s the reason OP started this thread.

Telling people to log off is not the answer. Tackling it head on is.

meeeeh

Guerillabear wrote: »

I read the comment, which is in poor taste, but so obviously a joke. The chap clearly had an audience that appreciated the joke, so who are we to decide that no-one should laugh at it?

We all have different temperaments and tolerances - the trick is to not make it everyone else’s problem when one of your lines are crossed.

I’m sure there are plenty of things that you find funny that others would find offensive.

Just log off.

You are one of the bullies who mock others (or giggle when other mock them) and then when confronted continue with lighten up, it's only a joke.

Stating I despise behaviour like that is not making it every else's problem. It's people like you slinging mud at others and whinging and playing victim when challenged. Typical coward behaviour.

Faith

cannotlogin wrote: »

Can I ask again why were the names edited from my post? Every other mod action taken has been commented on but not that one?

One of the posters named regularly starts threads which are offensive to women and their posts are left unedited.

If it's considered a personal attack, which it isn't, it's about the content of their posts, they regularly issue personal attacks on women ...where it the distinction?

I’d suggest PMing sullivlo to discuss your post specifically because I can’t speak on her behalf, but we’d never generally allow posters to be specifically targeted when they’re not posting in the thread or forum they’re being mentioned in. It’s just not very fair because it doesn’t give them much chance to defend themselves unless someone brings it to their attention.

I suppose an acceptable alternative would be saying something like “as long as threads like these [links] are allowed”, rather than naming specific posters.

cee_jay

Guerillabear wrote: »

I read the comment, which is in poor taste, but so obviously a joke. The chap clearly had an audience that appreciated the joke, so who are we to decide that no-one should laugh at it?

We all have different temperaments and tolerances - the trick is to not make it everyone else’s problem when one of your lines are crossed.

I’m sure there are plenty of things that you find funny that others would find offensive.

Just log off.

I'm not making it anyone else's problem - the poster asked to show where he had agreed with the sexist posts, that is what I did. Highlighted where he had supported a toxic sexist post. I have not engaged on the thread where that post was made, because I would not feel comfortable, or even have the mental energy, to do so.
Humour is indeed subjective, but your post highlights one of the toxic behaviours that is accepted on boards, namely "Oh other posters find it funny, so silence yourself there woman."
Boards is a discussion site, where discussion should be constructive, and civilised. What this thread is highlighting is there are areas across this site where women do not feel comfortable going, because the sexist, toxic posts go unchecked, and if a woman were to highlight these, they are the problem, not the underlying sexist tone of the thread.
It is the same for many different cohorts of posters - I know I sure wouldn't want to be posting on this site if I was black or a traveller.

Guerillabear

meeeeh wrote: »

You are one of the bullies who mock others (or giggle when other mock them) and then when confronted continue with lighten up, it's only a joke.

Stating I despise behaviour like that is not making it every else's problem. It's people like you slinging mud at others and whinging and playing victim when challenged. Typical coward behaviour.

If you don’t like it then don’t buy it. To conclude that I am a coward for not agreeing with a group of people likening sexist jokes to “rape culture” really does say it all.