Amber Heard admits to beating up Johnny Depp

Dufflecoat Fanny

When Doug Stanhope vouched for Depp I knew she was a c*nt

KiKi III

Silentcorner wrote: »

https://www.irishtimes.com/news/politics/varadkar-says-domestic-violence-is-at-epidemic-levels-1.4123037

In this article, he endorses The Istanbul Convention, which also, conveniently ignores female domestic violence.

There is a concerted effort, across the developed world, to airbrush male victims of domestic abuse thus denying funding for services to male victims, this is a grotesque abuse of tax payer funds.

Domestic Violence is not a gendered issue...but it has become one!

In that link, Leo makes one factual reference to the number of women murdered in instances of domestic violence last year and then goes on to talk about funding for domestic violence generally.

Nowhere does it say men are not victims. Nowhere does it say this funding won't support male victims, as it clearly should.

Will you accept that far fewer men are murdered by their female partners than vice versa? Elaine O'Hara, Jastine Valdez, Clodagh Hawe. Those are just off the top of my head, there are many more.

230 since 1996, according to this article: https://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/ireland/most-women-killed-by-partner-or-ex-230-died-violently-since-1996-two-thirds-in-their-own-home-965824.html

The corresponding figure if you swap the genders is a helluva lot lower.

Neither is acceptable. But we direct the best part of the funding to where the problem is greatest. Men are more likely to kill their wives than women are to kill their husbands. That's just a fact, whether you like it or not.

Should supports exist for male victims? YES.

Should male victims be taken seriously? YES.

Should we act like violence against women and violence against men are occurring at the same levels? NO.

Because it's not reality.

Silentcorner

KiKi III wrote: »

In that link, Leo makes one factual reference to the number of women murdered in instances of domestic violence last year and then goes on to talk about funding for domestic violence generally.

Nowhere does it say men are not victims. Nowhere does it say this funding won't support male victims, as it clearly should.

Will you accept that far fewer men are murdered by their female partners than vice versa? Elaine O'Hara, Jastine Valdez, Clodagh Hawe. Those are just off the top of my head, there are many more.

230 since 1996, according to this article: https://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/ireland/most-women-killed-by-partner-or-ex-230-died-violently-since-1996-two-thirds-in-their-own-home-965824.html

The corresponding figure if you swap the genders is a helluva lot lower.

Neither is acceptable. But we direct the best part of the funding to where the problem is greatest. Men are more likely to kill their wives than women are to kill their husbands. That's just a fact, whether you like it or not.

Should supports exist for male victims? YES.

Should male victims be taken seriously? YES.

Should we act like violence against women and violence against men are occurring at the same levels? NO.

Because it's not reality.

The Istanbul Convention is about preventing violence against women, through funding, you know, tax payers money.

There is a massive chasm between the amount of money that funds Domestic Abuse Services between men and women, so our society is deliberately ignoring male victims of domestic abuse.

I absolutely agree, that a man is much more likely to physically damage a women than a woman is to physically damage a man, this is reflected in the domestic homicide stats, but I also believe, that our society is as capable of producing a toxic woman as it is producing a toxic man, a toxic woman cannot use her fists so she will instead use emotionally manipulative methods (this is also how young girls bully each other) to do damage to the male....we have no way of calculating how prevalent that is in society because these men do not present themselves anywhere, they have nowhere to go.

We know that men commit suicide at a much higher rate than women, we know that relationship breakdown or parental alienation play a huge part in those figures but we have no idea if toxic female manipulation has anything to do with those tragic deaths...these are uncomfortable conversations but a progressive society should be well capable of discussing them in a respectful manner but that culture doesn't exist today and we seem to be regressing even faster.

So, you tell me, why don't we (or it seems any country in the developed world) take male victims of domestic abuse seriously or why we don't even talk about lesbian domestic abuse at all despite recording higher rates of abuse?

creditcarder

In fairness, there is an odd rise in mothers commiting infanticide.

Also, I do find it funny how now suddenly abuse is reciprocal :P Tbh, I don't get the vibe he was reciprocating

creditcarder

Tbh, there are a lot of studies to show that rape and domestic abuse is a two way street.

KiKi III

Silentcorner wrote: »

The Istanbul Convention is about preventing violence against women, through funding, you know, tax payers money.

There is a massive chasm between the amount of money that funds Domestic Abuse Services between men and women, so our society is deliberately ignoring male victims of domestic abuse.

I absolutely agree, that a man is much more likely to physically damage a women than a woman is to physically damage a man, this is reflected in the domestic homicide stats, but I also believe, that our society is as capable of producing a toxic woman as it is producing a toxic man, a toxic woman cannot use her fists so she will instead use emotionally manipulative methods (this is also how young girls bully each other) to do damage to the male....we have no way of calculating how prevalent that is in society because these men do not present themselves anywhere, they have nowhere to go.

We know that men commit suicide at a much higher rate than women, we know that relationship breakdown or parental alienation play a huge part in those figures but we have no idea if toxic female manipulation has anything to do with those tragic deaths...these are uncomfortable conversations but a progressive society should be well capable of discussing them in a respectful manner but that culture doesn't exist today and we seem to be regressing even faster.

So, you tell me, why don't we (or it seems any country in the developed world) take male victims of domestic abuse seriously or why we don't even talk about lesbian domestic abuse at all despite recording higher rates of abuse?

I'm glad we largely agree then.

In relation to your bolded section, I had a quick Google and found a variety of supports for male victims of domestic violence. Some of them are specifically for men like AnyMan or the Men's Development Network, while others like the Rape Crisis Centre support victims of either gender.

Now, I'm not at all opposed to more supports for men. I'd support more of my taxes going on supports for male victims.

I just don't see why you can't advocate for that without turning it into a rant against feminists. Your anger towards feminists massively detracts from the valid point you're making.

Raconteuse

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts wrote: »

No it wasn’t. Not everyone agreed that mental health was at play but it was discussed at length.

The very lengthy thread here ODB - I remember people being absolutely slated (including me) for suggesting he was mentally ill. I mean it was met with a really hostile reception. And statements that he was an abuser, with zero evidence. Now I can't help but despise him for what he did, but I do not believe he could possibly have been in his right mind, and I simply do not know whether he was an abusive husband/father.

creditcarder wrote: »

In fairness, there is an odd rise in mothers commiting infanticide.

There is?

KiKi III

Raconteuse wrote: »

The very lengthy thread here ODB - I remember people being absolutely slated (including me) for suggesting he was mentally ill. I mean it was met with a really hostile reception. And statements that he was an abuser, with zero evidence. Now I can't help but despise him for what he did, but I do not believe he could possibly have been in his right mind, and I simply do not know whether he was an abusive husband/father.

Ah, you're talking specifically about Boards? I'm talking about more generally in the media. There was loads of discussion around him having gone to counselling and having some secret he was ashamed of that caused him to do it.

Silentcorner

KiKi III wrote: »

I'm glad we largely agree then.

In relation to your bolded section, I had a quick Google and found a variety of supports for male victims of domestic violence. Some of them are specifically for men like AnyMan or the Men's Development Network, while others like the Rape Crisis Centre support victims of either gender.

Now, I'm not at all opposed to more supports for men. I'd support more of my taxes going on supports for male victims.

I just don't see why you can't advocate for that without turning it into a rant against feminists. Your anger towards feminists massively detracts from the valid point you're making.

Ok, but then I put it to you, your anger that I am not a feminist is affecting how you perceive me.

I am not on board with this wave of feminism it is in my belief a toxic presence in way too many important social issues which is deflecting from real issues....it is also damaging the ability of smart, intelligent women to think for themselves as it requires an almost cult like devotion to the Oppression/Tyranny theory's we witness week after week across media which has also infected the Domestic Violence/Abuse issue.

Across the developed world, there is a massive disparity between funding for male and female victims of domestic abuse, this issue resonates with me because I witnessed, in my small neighbourhood, the damage two very dysfunctional alcoholic women, one of whom was a violent alcoholic, did to their husbands and children, the battered husband of the violent alcoholic woman died homeless on the streets....if he had been a dog they'd have put him in a home.

I do not for one second deny the existence of toxic men and the damage they can do, but I'm not going along with this deliberately misleading narrative that has swept across the developed world that women are incapable of domestic abuse.

It is in my opinion an absolute disgrace and feminists should be ashamed of themselves for supporting it.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Raconteuse wrote: »

The very lengthy thread here ODB - I remember people being absolutely slated (including me) for suggesting he was mentally ill. I mean it was met with a really hostile reception. And statements that he was an abuser, with zero evidence. Now I can't help but despise him for what he did, but I do not believe he could possibly have been in his right mind, and I simply do not know whether he was an abusive husband/father.

I also read the thread. You said the topic of mental health was swiftly shut down. That wasn’t the case. Not everyone agreed and, well, it’s a discussion and that’s going to happen. But it came up a lot and continued to be discussed. In fact, it was still being discussed in the recent thread on the infanticide case. Conflating disagreement with shutting down a topic is so fucking irritating. And commonplace, these days.

Always Tired

I'd say it's not a him or her situation as regards being abusive. It was likely a toxic relationship with a lot of fighting and alcohol and both them being horrible to one another.

retro:electro

Always Tired wrote: »

I'd say it's not a him or her situation as regards being abusive. It was likely a toxic relationship with a lot of fighting and alcohol and both them being horrible to one another.

I think so too but I have to say he comes across really reasonable in the recording. Like he was at the end of this tether and just fed up with her shlte. Who knows what went on and the degree of it all but one thing is clear and that’s she is not the victim she has claimed to be. Total Gone Girl vibes off her.

LillySV

ygolometsipe wrote: »

Amber heard can abuse me any time she wants!

I’d happily lie there and let her abuse me!! 😊

retro:electro

LillySV wrote: »

I’d happily lie there and let her abuse me!! 😊

Mortified for anyone who makes jokes like this. They’re not even funny.

Dufflecoat Fanny

https://www.thewrap.com/johnny-depp-is-being-blackmailed-by-amber-heard-heres-how-i-know-guest-column/

good read

LillySV

retro:electro wrote: »

Mortified for anyone who makes jokes like this. They’re not even funny.

Im mortified that there’s so many soft little men out there moaning and spending too much time going on about their feelings ..

If u feel hard done by in a relationship, then u leave and split up

harden up and consider all the people out there getting a far worse deal in life than you or Johnny Depp... there’s poor women out in Poor African countries that get a public flogging and burned to death in front of the village ... all because someone accuses them of being a slut or commiting adultery... judgement and execution follows without any evidence ....

I don’t think Johnny or u has it so bad... if u not happy in relationship then leave

KiKi III

Silentcorner wrote: »

Across the developed world, there is a massive disparity between funding for male and female victims of domestic abuse, this issue resonates with me because I witnessed, in my small neighbourhood, the damage two very dysfunctional alcoholic women, one of whom was a violent alcoholic, did to their husbands and children, the battered husband of the violent alcoholic woman died homeless on the streets....if he had been a dog they'd have put him in a home.

I do not for one second deny the existence of toxic men and the damage they can do, but I'm not going along with this deliberately misleading narrative that has swept across the developed world that women are incapable of domestic abuse.

It is in my opinion an absolute disgrace and feminists should be ashamed of themselves for supporting it.

Well, I've never seen any of my feminist peers attempt to claim men are not the victims of domestic violence. Not once. I can't be ashamed of myself for supporting a narrative when that narrative, as far as I know, doesn't exist.

Advocating for women doesn't mean you don't support men, you're creating a correlation there that doesn't exist.

There is a massive disparity in funding because there is a massive disparity in impact. You've already admitted far more women suffering domestic abuse get murdered than the other way around. So obviously that's going to create a disparity?

To reiterate, I'm in favour of more supports for men. But I recognise the reality that women are far more likely to be victims, and therefore far more likely to need these supports.

It's a shame you're not as upset about the disparity of perpetrators as well as victims.

Domestic violence - an issue of gender

1 in 7 women in Ireland compared to 1 in 17 men experience severe domestic violence. Women are over twice as likely as men to have experienced severe physical abuse, seven times more likely to have experienced sexual abuse, and are more likely to experience serious injuries than men. (National Crime Council and ESRI, Domestic Abuse of Women and Men in Ireland, 2005)

90% of the more systematic, persistent and injurious violence that is instrumental in the maintenance of power, is perpetrated by men. (Male Victims of Domestic Violence: A Substantive and Methodology Research Review, Michael S. Kimmel, 2001)

A major study of police reports and crime surveys in the UK, USA and Canada found that between 90 and 97% of perpetrators of violence in intimate relationships are men. (Dobash and Dobash, Women, Violence and Social Change, 1992)

In the five years ending in March 2010, more than 312,100 defendants were prosecuted for domestic violence in the UK. 93% of defendants were men and 85% of victims were women. [Violence against Women Crime Report 2009-2010, UK Crown Prosecution Service]

https://www.womensaid.ie/about/policy/natintstats.html#X-201209171234296

anewme

LillySV wrote: »

Im mortified that there’s so many soft little men out there moaning and spending too much time going on about their feelings ..

If u feel hard done by in a relationship, then u leave and split up

harden up and consider all the people out there getting a far worse deal in life than you or Johnny Depp... there’s poor women out in Poor African countries that get a public flogging and burned to death in front of the village ... all because someone accuses them of being a slut or commiting adultery... judgement and execution follows without any evidence ....

Said it yesterday, this is a step further, exactly why men suffer in silence. This is the attitude that needs to be shut down.

LillySV

anewme wrote: »

Said it yesterday, this is a step further, exactly why men suffer in silence. This is the attitude that needs to be shut down.

Why they suffer in silence ... why don’t they go on Bords and talk about their feelings like u

Fr_Dougal

LillySV wrote: »

Why they suffer in silence ... why don’t they go on Bords and talk about their feelings like u

Dig up.

Ironicname

LillySV wrote:

Im mortified that there’s so many soft little men out there moaning and spending too much time going on about their feelings ..

Are you a man or a woman?

Either way, your post was despicable but it would be interesting to know which you are.

anewme

LillySV wrote: »

Why they suffer in silence ... why don’t they go on Bords and talk about their feelings like u

I'm a woman.

But men will always be afraid to speak out about their feelings or mental health when there are ignorant dinosaurs such as yourself ready to belittle them.

retro:electro

LillySV wrote: »

Why they suffer in silence ... why don’t they go on Bords and talk about their feelings like u

You’re an awful ejit god bless ya

Silentcorner

KiKi III wrote: »

Well, I've never seen any of my feminist peers attempt to claim men are not the victims of domestic violence. Not once. I can't be ashamed of myself for supporting a narrative when that narrative, as far as I know, doesn't exist.

Advocating for women doesn't mean you don't support men, you're creating a correlation there that doesn't exist.

There is a massive disparity in funding because there is a massive disparity in impact. You've already admitted far more women suffering domestic abuse get murdered than the other way around. So obviously that's going to create a disparity?

To reiterate, I'm in favour of more supports for men. But I recognise the reality that women are far more likely to be victims, and therefore far more likely to need these supports.

It's a shame you're not as upset about the disparity of perpetrators as well as victims.



https://www.womensaid.ie/about/policy/natintstats.html#X-201209171234296

I trust no one anymore when it comes to reports like this, I used to, I used to believe that there was a Gender Pay Gap...I used to believe that there existed a "rape culture"...I was wrong, I was manipulated by people and media who have a vested interest in misleading the public including politicians...I feel foolish as at my age I should have known better....that is the problem The Women's Council face...they have spun so many mistruths that more and more people like me will no longer place any trust in anything they publish.

Do your feminist peers recognise that bisexual women and lesbians are way more likely to engage in or be victims of domestic abuse?....Ya...didn't think so....

LillySV

Ironicname wrote: »

Are you a man or a woman?

Either way, your post was despicable but it would be interesting to know which you are.

Why will u be sexist if I’m a woman or if I’m a man?

I thought we were all equal?

Ironicname

Silentcorner wrote:

I trust no one anymore when it comes to reports like this, I used to, I used to believe that there was a Gender Pay Gap...I used to believe that there existed a "rape culture"...I was wrong, I was manipulated by people and media who have a vested interest in misleading the public including politicians...I feel foolish as at my age I should have known better....that is the problem The Women's Council face...they have spun so many mistruths that more and more people like me will no longer place any trust in anything they publish.

I'm glad to see the gradual acceptance from people that we were being lied to about rape culture and the pay gap issue.

I can see a shift where the toxic feminism which was accepted without question is now being abandoned in favour of truthfulness.

The myths listed above, blaming everything on the Patriarchy, perpetual victimhood of women and constant burden of responsibility for all men to account for the action of a few is more of a reason for men not speaking out against abuse.

#imwithher #ibelieveher #metoo

All should have been decent movements but how in all honestly can any movement that believes someone purely because of their sex (and by proxy automatically disbelieves others because of theirs) is any way progressive or equal.

Still a long way to go but it's great to see a shift.

KiKi III

Silentcorner wrote: »

I trust no one anymore when it comes to reports like this

If you're rejecting extensive, international studies, where are you getting your information from?

I understand that we're living in the post-truth era, but you can't just reject stuff because you don't like it with no corresponding studies or research to back up your own point of view.

Silentcorner wrote: »

Do your feminist peers recognise that bisexual women and lesbians are way more likely to engage in or be victims of domestic abuse?....Ya...didn't think so....

I'll be honest with you, it's not something that has come up in conversation. I would be interested in a link to back that up (and unlike you, if you provide a credible link, I'll accept it) At a guess I'd say that's because only about 4% of women are lesbians and it would be a small percentage of that who have been victims of domestic violence.

Why are you trying so hard to detract from the fact that the main problem is male-on-female domestic violence? You already acknowledged it above but you're undercutting yourself.

Where is your outrage on behalf of the 230 women murdered by their partners since 1996?

Ironicname

LillySV wrote:

Why will u be sexist if I’m a woman or if I’m a man?

I never said I would. I abhor sexism. I said specifically regardless of your sex, it was a despicable comment.

I was just wondering if the comment came from a man or a woman.

LillySV wrote:

I thought we were all equal?

Men and women aren't equal. They are different. They are afforded equal rights under law which is absolutely correct, but to deny that there are differences is patently absurd. There are traits that are typical for certain sexes

But you seem to think ALL men should be the same and someone who doesn't portray the typical stereotypes are somehow lesser.

That's unfair and a horrible expectation to have.

Silentcorner

KiKi III wrote: »

If you're rejecting extensive, international studies, where are you getting your information from?

I understand that we're living in the post-truth era, but you can't just reject stuff because you don't like it with no corresponding studies or research to back up your own point of view.



I'll be honest with you, it's not something that has come up in conversation. I would be interested in a link to back that up (and unlike you, if you provide a credible link, I'll accept it) At a guess I'd say that's because only about 4% of women are lesbians and it would be a small percentage of that who have been victims of domestic violence.

Why are you trying so hard to detract from the fact that the main problem is male-on-female domestic violence? You already acknowledged it above but you're undercutting yourself.

Where is your outrage on behalf of the 230 women murdered by their partners since 1996?

I am rejecting the produce of the extensive, international, well funded Feminist lobby that exists all over the developed world...I told you...there was a time when I believed it all...but I was wrong...I was fooled, the industry has a vested interest in fooling as many people as they can including governments....they have fooled me for the last time.

I have already provided a link to the study I was referring to...there is plenty of legitimate research by people who have a vested interest in identifying and helping actual victims of domestic abuse.

The link I provided, and there are plenty more online just do some research, almost consistently show that for instance, gay relationships record domestic abuse at about half the level of lesbian abuse...incidentally lesbian marriages also break down at more than twice the rate of gay marriages ( https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/lesbian-couples-more-likely-divorced-male-same-sex-marriages-uk-ons-figures-a8006741.html) so there is a pattern emerging that within human relationships, all is not equal....

Of course I have empathy for murdered women, but as I pointed out in an earlier post, until we have some idea how many men have been driven to an early grave because of a toxic woman (I personally knew one man) it is best to reserve judgment on which gender is more damaging to the other...it gets us absolutely no where....of course, that would require a much larger share of funding to enable that research to take place, something that is not going to happen anytime soon.

ibFoxer

LillySV wrote: »

Why they suffer in silence ... why don’t they go on Bords and talk about their feelings like u

I don't know whether i'm more upset by what you're saying or the fact that you can't seem to use the entire alphabet that is at your disposal.