Drama at work with the boss

Pineapple1

OMM 0000: Look, you have stated on here you are in management yourself, obviously you are seeing it from a manager's point of view only. Nothing will be happening regarding this issue until Tuesday.

OMM 0000

Pineapple1 wrote: »

OMM 0000: Look, you have stated on here you are in management yourself, obviously you are seeing it from a manager's point of view only. Nothing will be happening regarding this issue until Tuesday.

I just think angrily telling someone in the workplace they're a lunatic, and angrily letting them know "what you think of them" is abusive behaviour.

Imagine it was your manager doing that to you.

Imagine how upset you'd be.

If you really can't see anything wrong with your behaviour, it makes me doubt you're as innocent as you say you are.

I do wish you a good outcome.

Wheety

Sounds like the management style in a well known Irish supermarket chain. Going by the OP's side of it anyway.

Escapees

@OP, I have seen staff treated like you have been in the past, where everything's been rosy but then their manager starts suddenly picking them up on everything and anything. It's nearly always someone with lower self-esteem or confidence than other staff, and that's more likely to take it.

In one case, it also started happening just before the staff's probation period was ending - in that case it emerged that the manager had been put under pressure to reduce staff numbers and all the other staff there, no matter how sloppy their work was in comparison, were permanent. In another case, it was simply a case of the manager being stressed and just venting by picking on a staff member who would take it - i.e. effectively bullying them.

Anyway, what often happened was that the person being picked on became more and more anxious and nervous at work and this would then lead to them making mistakes, genuine ones this time. And things sadly tended to spiral from there...

I would strongly recommend that you park all this s*it, focus on any exams you have left and then just go in to work on Tuesday and hand in your notice at the start of the day. The scheduled meeting will likely not happen then. Even if your manager had magically planned to apologise to you at this, there's nothing stopping them from persuading you not to leave. Note that I would not give any reason for leaving or get into any discussion on it.

In the days after, you can properly reflect on things and decide what to do next - e.g. write to upper management about your experience, start looking for work again etc. But you will likely feel much more relaxed and happy about things, not anxious and stressed out.

Paula Incalculable Mosque

Paula Incalculable Mosque wrote: »

Unless the OP's minimum notice period gives them more than 12 months continuous service, that's more or less it.

The above is key regarding relevant timing.

The OP's story is often repeated here on boards in that it's typical, and while a single source is unlikely to tell the full picture, there's enough in the OP's post to at least be plausible.

The OP's priority should be their own mental health, especially with exams coming up.

There's plenty of sales assistant type work out there. It's not your responsibility to fix the manager. As suggested, to get closure, once you've left you could write to management about your experiences. Be careful of defamation laws.

Good luck.

Blueshoe

It's just a job. Hand in your notice but take Tuesday as your day to get even with her. That's all you have to do on Tuesday. Make her cry.

Also get her to have a go at you and voice record it. Then blackmail her

Pineapple1

Thanks everyone for the supportive responses, I really appreciate the advice given. Will take Tuesday as it comes when it arrives.

osarusan

Pineapple1 wrote: »

Thanks everyone for the supportive responses, I really appreciate the advice given. Will take Tuesday as it comes when it arrives.

Will that Tuesday meeting be just the two of you? Could you request that another person attend also?

Nobelium

OP Don't make the mistake of wasting your Time money and health in a dysfunctional workplace with a dysfunctional manger.

Get out of that company as quickly as possible, even if it means a cut and pay in conditions, and move onward and upwards.

If anyone tells you anything else it's very bad / inexperienced advice.

Your health and well being is your actual wealth.

Pineapple1

Osarusan: tbh Im really not sure, and I know I should know, although I have a feeling it will be me, the boss, and the other floor boss (he is not my direct boss but he would have authority to manage me over something if it did come up if you get me)

Pineapple1

Well guys, just here on my lunch break, have just over 2 hours left untip.my meeting and tbh Im not sue wjat to expect. Half of me kind of wants to be sacked but the other half is not sure. My boss has been sound towards me today, very helpful for a change (probably out of awkwardness). I was nearly sick with nerves all day and night yesterday, woke up once every hour with nerves etc

gimli2112

Companies can simply decide not to take probationary employees on permanently, it works out cheaper for them but it's a crappy way to do business imo. Years ago I was asked by my employer why I should be employed over my co-worker who was also coming to the end of their probationary period and I told them they absolutely should hire the other person who was brilliant. They let both of us go.


If you enjoy working there it will be a pity but not much more than that. It won't be a sacking though, just a crappy work practice.

gordongekko

Pineapple1 wrote: »

Well guys, just here on my lunch break, have just over 2 hours left untip.my meeting and tbh Im not sue wjat to expect. Half of me kind of wants to be sacked but the other half is not sure. My boss has been sound towards me today, very helpful for a change (probably out of awkwardness). I was nearly sick with nerves all day and night yesterday, woke up once every hour with nerves etc

Stay calm. Say as little as possible. Record the meeting if possible

Pineapple1

Pineapple1 wrote: »

Well guys, just here on my lunch break, have just over 2 hours left untip.my meeting and tbh Im not sue wjat to expect. Half of me kind of wants to be sacked but the other half is not sure. My boss has been sound towards me today, very helpful for a change (probably out of awkwardness). I was nearly sick with nerves all day and night yesterday, woke up once every hour with nerves etc

You cant be "sacked" in a yearly review? Can you? Seems a totally and unprofessional setting to terminate anyones employment. Has to be a separate process?

Mya Angry Vow

Mya Angry Vow wrote: »

You cant be "sacked" in a yearly review? Can you? Seems a totally and unprofessional setting to terminate anyones employment. Has to be a separate process?

Within year one - perfectly legal. One year (or time served plus notice period) then no, totally separate process (at least in theory).

Tomw86

How did it go?

Pineapple1

They said I didnt pass my probabtion. I just said to them thats fine. And said to be honest I had been wanting to leave aswell for some time. It was all very amicable. They let me type up a resignation letter dated one week ago so that was sound of them. Although I think some of the reasons they gave were questionable considering I seen coworkers guilty of doing the same things, there was no point in going there with them. I'm free of that boss now. Just kind of dont know what to think, sitting here in a bit of a daze.

Thanks for letting us know Pineapple. Chalk it up to experience, which will stand by you, and move on with a smile.

gimli2112

the one I feel most sorry for in all this is the person who replaces you.

Pineapple1

Gimlii2112: Absolutely.

Pineapple1

Shortly after I left for home I received an email questionnaire from the company. Had a quick read through it and its pretty much just asking what I thought of my management, what did I not like about my time working there etc. Not sure should I be brutally honest. It will be sent to HR and not to my boss.

Former Observer

You're out of it now so relax and forget about it. I personally would have rather taken a little bit more control towards the end. Hand in my notice at the start of the day and write a polite but rather substantial letter pinpointing the issues that arose and where you feel your boss let you down. I would still do this and I would be brutally truthful in the review questionnaire sent to you by HR (while remaining professional). It sounds like they have sweet talked you a bit today, as you're now referring to them as "sound", when in actual fact they have let you go without a second thought. If there was bullying at work you owe it to yourself and to anybody that comes after you to leave on your terms.

Onwards and upwards!

Snow Garden

Pineapple1 wrote: »

Shortly after I left for home I received an email questionnaire from the company. Had a quick read through it and its pretty much just asking what I thought of my management, what did I not like about my time working there etc. Not sure should I be brutally honest. It will be sent to HR and not to my boss.

Ignore it. HR are generally useless/spineless so will not act against the poor manager.
Do you mind me asking what kind of a company it is? Multinational? Public/Private? Home country? Employee number?

Snow Garden

Nobelium wrote: »

OP Don't make the mistake of wasting your Time money and health in a dysfunctional workplace with a dysfunctional manger.

Your health and well being is your actual wealth.

So true. How many people ruin their physical/mental health trying to climb the magical corporate ladder in a toxic/stressful work environment. 'Career' trumps everything. They wake up some day in their 40s or 50s and wonder why they are ill or unwanted or why they missed out on their kids growing up.

Blueshoe

Snow Garden wrote: »

So true. How many people ruin their physical/mental health trying to climb the magical corporate ladder in a toxic/stressful work environment. 'Career' trumps everything. They wake up some day in their 40s or 50s and wonder why they are ill or unwanted or why they missed out on their kids growing up.

Then they buy themselves a sports car and take their 20 year old girlfriend out to dinner

jimd2

If it was me I would be completely honest and give as many details as possible in the response to HR.

is_that_so

Pineapple1 wrote: »

Shortly after I left for home I received an email questionnaire from the company. Had a quick read through it and its pretty much just asking what I thought of my management, what did I not like about my time working there etc. Not sure should I be brutally honest. It will be sent to HR and not to my boss.

You might say something about "not always getting the support you felt you needed". It's nice vague HR speak and a slight rap on the knuckles to the manager! Otherwise be as bland and inoffensive as you can, grateful for your time and all that. Always better to leave people with positive memories of you.

irishgirl19

Sounds like you dodged a bullet there.
Its onwards and upwards from here. Good luck to you OP. Staying in that job would've been terrible for your mental health

Snow Garden

is_that_so wrote: »

You might say something about "not always getting the support you felt you needed". It's nice vague HR speak and a slight rap on the knuckles to the manager! Otherwise be as bland and inoffensive as you can, grateful for your time and all that. Always better to leave people with positive memories of you.

No no, don't respond to HR. Pointless. Treat them with the utter disdain they deserve for protecting a bully. They are just following process and will ignore what is written. The manager could simply rubbish it all and label you a troublemaker without you knowing. HR will always side with the manager/company. They will usually choose the easy solution (in this case, turn a blind eye). HR managers are often failed functional managers.

You have resigned and it sounds like you were a good employee and a loss to the company. Whether the manager likes it or not it is a blot on her copybook. She caused an efficient resource to resign. People know. Her manager knows. Her peers know. Her reports know. People talk. People remember. She could have previous and she will certainly make mistakes again. They will put 2 and 2 together. Her foundation is rocked now.

DesperateDan

Snow Garden wrote:

You have resigned and it sounds like you were a good employee and a loss to the company. Whether the manager likes it or not it is a blot on her copybook. She caused an efficient resource to resign. People know. Her manager knows. Her peers know. Her reports know. People talk. People remember. She could have previous and she will certainly make mistakes again. They will put 2 and 2 together. Her foundation is rocked now.

I'm more cynical than that, I imagine what OP went through happening once a year and the manager knowing exactly what they're doing purely because as soon as you are permanent you are more of a threat.

OP don't forget to leave a detailed Glass Door review which might help out the next poor soul