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What's the etiquette here??

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    #5252
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,122 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Sure it is.... stinky leathers, soaked in piss,a fcuking tin can on your head and Patrick Power would give good odds of not returning from the week end.

    Fork off pal.

    Soaked in piss? What have you been up to Brendan?

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



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    #5253
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users Posts: 19,136 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Hotblack Desiato wrote: »
    Soaked in piss? What have you been up to Brendan?

    I would suggest it might be difficult to get the gear off to hose a quart of piss at the side of the M11.

    Better let her slosh in the leathers?


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    #5254
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,122 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Tank range on most bikes is only an hour or two so you'll be stopping anyway...

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



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    #5255
    JohnnyFlash
    Registered Users Posts: 7,055 ✭✭✭JohnnyFlash


    Hotblack Desiato wrote: »
    Tank range on most bikes is only an hour or two so you'll be stopping anyway...

    I’d say Brendan is the sort of fella who has to visit the can at least 15 times per day, 5 times at night, and is often seen pulled over on a hard shoulder attempting to dribble out an eggcup worth of piss into a bush.


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    #5256
    Sober Crappy Chemis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 461 ✭✭Sober Crappy Chemis


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    I’d say Brendan is the sort of fella who has to visit the can at least 15 times per day, 5 times at night, and is often seen pulled over on a hard shoulder attempting to dribble out an eggcup worth of piss into a bush.

    Using the 'overhand' holding method to shield the minature glans from passing traffic.


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    #5257
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users Posts: 19,136 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Sober Crappy Chemis wrote: »
    Using the 'overhand' holding method to shield the minature glans from passing traffic.

    I find the ‘covered wagon’ procedure shields the schlong more thoroughly.


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    #5258
    fuerte1976
    Closed Accounts Posts: 692 ✭✭✭fuerte1976


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    I find the ‘covered wagon’ procedure shields the schlong more thoroughly.

    And any dude with a foreskin will p1ss all over your paw and down the pants n brogs..

    Disaster


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    #5259
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,122 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Somewhat on-topic, I found out today that yer man from Friday Night Dinner on Channel 4 did a "stand-up" routine about his penis.

    https://www.theguardian.com/stage/2019/aug/13/tom-rosenthal-manhood-foreskin-edinburgh

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



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    #5260
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,122 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    I’d say Brendan is the sort of fella who has to visit the can at least 15 times per day, 5 times at night, and is often seen pulled over on a hard shoulder attempting to dribble out an eggcup worth of piss into a bush.

    Needs to wear waterproof shoes in fine weather.

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



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    #5261
    JohnnyFlash
    Registered Users Posts: 7,055 ✭✭✭JohnnyFlash


    Had a bean, sweetcorn, and lentil chilli for dinner last night. You turning into a hippy, Johnny, I hear you ask? Absolutely not, but I am trying to eat a bit healthier and am only tearing into the cans twice per week. Must say I saw the benefits already - shunted out a lovely smooth log this afternoon. Coiled up nicely in the pan, very little ‘paperwork’ required, and sent it off to Ringsend with a single flush.

    Top class.


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    #5262
    armaghlad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,660 ✭✭✭armaghlad


    A potent mix. Can imagine a pungent aroma around casa de flash in the hours leading up to your satisfying deposit


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    #5263
    Rodney Bathgate
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,445 ✭✭✭Rodney Bathgate


    Hotblack Desiato wrote: »
    Somewhat on-topic, I found out today that yer man from Friday Night Dinner on Channel 4 did a "stand-up" routine about his penis.

    https://www.theguardian.com/stage/2019/aug/13/tom-rosenthal-manhood-foreskin-edinburgh

    Jim Rosenthal’s son.


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    #5264
    Rodney Bathgate
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,445 ✭✭✭Rodney Bathgate


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    Had a bean, sweetcorn, and lentil chilli for dinner last night. You turning into a hippy, Johnny, I hear you ask? Absolutely not, but I am trying to eat a bit healthier and am only tearing into the cans twice per week. Must say I saw the benefits already - shunted out a lovely smooth log this afternoon. Coiled up nicely in the pan, very little ‘paperwork’ required, and sent it off to Ringsend with a single flush.

    Top class.

    This thread needs more pictures!


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    #5265
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,122 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Pictures = instant lock.

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



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    #5266
    MaureensFry
    Closed Accounts Posts: 48 ✭MaureensFry


    Hotblack Desiato wrote: »
    Pictures = instant lock.

    What about if there blurred but still gets the message across?


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    #5267
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    MaureensFry wrote: »
    What about if there blurred but still gets the message across?

    No need, the wordsmiths who post here describe fecal matters far better than any picture could.


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    #5268
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users Posts: 19,136 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Just let off a hippo’s front leg down the pipes.

    Best give the lads in the shït farm a ring to ‘get the big knives out’ to cut the fcuker up.

    Don’t want a blockage at Easter.


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    #5269
    JohnnyFlash
    Registered Users Posts: 7,055 ✭✭✭JohnnyFlash


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Just let off a hippo’s front leg down the pipes.

    Best give the lads in the shït farm a ring to ‘get the big knives out’ to cut the fcuker up.

    Don’t want a blockage at Easter.

    I’d say you were able to do up the belt a couple of notches after unloading that brown beast.


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    #5270
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users Posts: 19,136 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    I’d say you were able to do up the belt a couple of notches after unloading that brown beast.

    For sure John, forget about the belt, had to slacken the drawstring a fair bit on the hoop , gave her a right good stretch, took a deep rub of ‘Muzzle Unction’ to prevent a tear in the lad.

    Accommodate the handle of a Pierce shovel, so she could.

    For about 10minutes.


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    #5271
    Rodney Bathgate
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,445 ✭✭✭Rodney Bathgate


    When showering (yeah yeah), I occasionally sing / hum the following songs with modified lyrics that are appropriate to this thread:

    - To the tune of ‘Moon River’ but with the words ‘Brown Finger’, works very well with the tune, same number of syllables and rhymes.

    - To the tune of ‘Mellow Yellow’ but ‘They call me Brown Finger ...’ there are a few vocal contortions to make it work. :)

    - Not forgetting ‘Downtown’ (Petula Clark song) replaced with ‘Browntown’, an easy substitute.

    Anyone else do this, and if so what are your favourites?


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    #5272
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,122 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Just let off a hippo’s front leg down the pipes.

    Best give the lads in the shït farm a ring to ‘get the big knives out’ to cut the fcuker up.

    Don’t want a blockage at Easter.

    "No better buachaill" Brendan as a former colleague of mine used to say.

    The number you're looking for is Ringsend 2.

    Talk about form following function though. Ring's End.

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



  • Options
    #5273
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,122 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    For sure John, forget about the belt, had to slacken the drawstring a fair bit on the hoop , gave her a right good stretch, took a deep rub of ‘Muzzle Unction’ to prevent a tear in the lad.

    Accommodate the handle of a Pierce shovel, so she could.

    For about 10minutes.

    I'd say it's the sort of dilation they normally only see in the Rotunda.

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



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    #5274
    Rodney Bathgate
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,445 ✭✭✭Rodney Bathgate


    Hotblack Desiato wrote: »
    I'd say it's the sort of dilation they normally only see in the Rotunda.

    And even then only for the 1 in 100 massive headed babies.


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    #5275
    sligojoek
    Registered Users Posts: 25,420 ✭✭✭✭sligojoek


    Was it a big child or a small turkey?


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    #5276
    Sober Crappy Chemis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 461 ✭✭Sober Crappy Chemis


    Deleted User wrote: »
    No need, the wordsmiths who post here describe fecal matters far better than any picture could.

    Exactly, we don’t want pictures painting a thousand turds.


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    #5277
    Ush1
    Registered Users Posts: 11,463 ✭✭✭✭Ush1


    Lethal combination of a large Inferno pizza from four star and 8 cans of Arthur's finest.

    The pebble dashing this morning is striping the porcelain off the bowl.


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    #5278
    Lewis_Benson
    Registered Users Posts: 1,913 ✭✭✭Lewis_Benson


    Ush1 wrote: »
    Lethal combination of a large Inferno pizza from four star and 8 cans of Arthur's finest.

    The pebble dashing this morning is striping the porcelain off the bowl.

    That's what you get for mixing spices and stout.


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    #5279
    MaureensFry
    Closed Accounts Posts: 48 ✭MaureensFry


    What's the best way to preserve a **** in a large jar

    24 incher this morning and would like to display it on the mantle piece.


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    #5280
    Rodney Bathgate
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,445 ✭✭✭Rodney Bathgate


    MaureensFry wrote: »
    What's the best way to preserve a **** in a large jar

    24 incher this morning and would like to display it on the mantle piece.

    Was it one of yours, or one of Paddy’s?

    Try formaldehyde to preserve.


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    #5281
    Sober Crappy Chemis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 461 ✭✭Sober Crappy Chemis


    MaureensFry wrote: »
    What's the best way to preserve a **** in a large jar

    24 incher this morning and would like to display it on the mantle piece.

    Tupperware is better than a jar I hear....


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