What would you do

jlm29

Hannibal_Smith wrote: »

Our club doesn'thave a facility either. We stand and wait.

Did you leave a 6 year old unsupervised? Or the kid at the blitz?

When I say facility, I mean timetabling, I’m not expecting a waiting area with tea and coffee. The coaches complain when kids miss training. They complain when kids miss blitzes. If things clash, kids either have to miss something, or they have to be unsupervised.

It actually wasn’t an issue for me after all this week, but several other parents had the issue. One said she couldn’t bring X to the blitz, because Y had training, and the response was “we will get a lift for him, don’t worry” so obviously the coaches don’t expect constant parental supervision for each child either

Charles Ingles

All the excuses for not staying with children.
Then attack the volunteer

iamwhoiam

Charles Ingles wrote: »

All the excuses for not staying with children.
Then attack the volunteer

The volunteer who pushes kids and calls them names and uses bad language ? Shame on anyone who condones that

meeeeh

Charles Ingles wrote: »

All the excuses for not staying with children.
Then attack the volunteer

If the volunteer is not up to the job they shouldn't be doing it. Neither should parents stay constantly around, I don't need to hold kids hands while they do their activities neither I intend to. In fact often parents are a distraction.

Gaa is not some pennyless organization and they get future players from running those programmes. Just because some adult donkey volunteers it doesn't mean they should be immune to criticism or allowed to behave as they wish around kids. If anything ther approach will be off putting and less kids will want to train.

judeboy101

He'll never play under 9's with that attitude.

Plumbthedepths

jlm29 wrote:

It actually wasn’t an issue for me after all this week, but several other parents had the issue. One said she couldn’t bring X to the blitz, because Y had training, and the response was “we will get a lift for him, don’t worry†so obviously the coaches don’t expect constant parental supervision for each child either

Charles Ingles wrote:

All the excuses for not staying with children. Then attack the volunteer

Maybe read the above?

Johnson_76

Hi OP here. For the people telling me not to believe my 8 year old, it reminds me that the patriarchy is alive and well. In years gone by children were not believed, a priest would never do that. Etc. I personally believe my children.

Yes it was to do with catching a ball, the boy is slightly on the autism spectrum, and takes a while to coordinate himself. No need to push him to the ground.

I take all the information given to me with gratitude. Whether I was at training or not is not the point. Thanks

meeeeh

When mine were doing drama we dropped them at the door and were told when to collect them. What is so different by Gaa that kids shouldn't be left alone there? I can understand why parents with really young kids need to be present at swimming but I really don't know what's so special about gaa.

Charles Ingles

Johnson_76 wrote: »

Hi OP here. For the people telling me not to believe my 8 year old, it reminds me that the patriarchy is alive and well. In years gone by children were not believed, a priest would never do that. Etc. I personally believe my children.

Yes it was to do with catching a ball, the boy is slightly on the autism spectrum, and takes a while to coordinate himself. No need to push him to the ground.

I take all the information given to me with gratitude. Whether I was at training or not is not the point. Thanks

That completely changes the situation you never said your child was on the autism spectrum.
My sister is autistic and the hustle and bustle of football or gaa would be too much for her.
Is the coach aware of his difference if so he is a jerk

Jurgen Klopp

I know plenty's coaches that **** and light lads from say u14 up

But not 8 year olds and honestly I have no idea how you think any rural community is gonna go against you if this man pushed an 8 year old child to teh ground, you'd probably be labeled a right whinger if say he called then ****in eejits once and you were barging in but I know of no rural or urban community that would stand for what you've described

Are you from an urban community originally and buying into rural stereotypes?

MayoSalmon

Give that "coach" a hiding would be my first thought

Johnson_76

Charles Ingles wrote: »

That completely changes the situation you never said your child was on the autism spectrum.
My sister is autistic and the hustle and bustle of football or gaa would be too much for her.
Is the coach aware of his difference if so he is a jerk

He is not autistic, he is on the spectrum, once he figures stuff out, not a bother hurling, rugby you name it.

Dravokivich

Charles Ingles wrote: »

Gaa is physical game.
On the picth is quite tough kids have to be prepared for that.

This isn't about the sport. It doesn't matter if its gaa, rugby or tiddly winks. The kid was forcibly moved. And it sounds like they are all regularly put down verbally and quite harshly at that. There is no place for that in anything, where someone is putting themselves in a mentorship role.

iamwhoiam

Charles Ingles wrote: »

That completely changes the situation you never said your child was on the autism spectrum.
My sister is autistic and the hustle and bustle of football or gaa would be too much for her.
Is the coach aware of his difference if so he is a jerk

It doesn't change anything , no child of 8 should be pushed or shoved or cursed at
All children including the OPs boy deserve much better than that .
People wouldn't except it in a chess class or a ballet class or a basketball training . So what is different about GAA ? Its not exceptable behaviour for any mentor of young children

Hannibal_Smith

meeeeh wrote: »

When mine were doing drama we dropped them at the door and were told when to collect them. What is so different by Gaa that kids shouldn't be left alone there? I can understand why parents with really young kids need to be present at swimming but I really don't know what's so special about gaa.

Because with the GAA, in particular hurling kids get hurt. Ive been at training so many times and a kid gets a crack of the hurl on the fingers or on the ankle. It hurts so much! So many times ive seen an injured kid and the coaches trying to comfort them or one of uswho stays. I dont like it and im glad i manage to be able to stay. I would encourage other parents to too when theyre that young.

Hannibal_Smith

Johnson_76 wrote: »

He is not autistic, he is on the spectrum, once he figures stuff out, not a bother hurling, rugby you name it.

Did you have a word with anyone in the club yet? Other coach orother parents?

meeeeh

Hannibal_Smith wrote: »

Because with the GAA, in particular hurling kids get hurt. Ive been at training so many times and a kid gets a crack of the hurl on the fingers or on the ankle. It hurts so much! So many times ive seen an injured kid and the coaches trying to comfort them or one of uswho stays. I dont like it and im glad i manage to be able to stay. I would encourage other parents to too when theyre that young.

I don't. I think kids don't need parents constantly hoovering around.

jlm29

meeeeh wrote: »

I don't. I think kids don't need parents constantly hoovering around.

This. My seven year old would look for a stretcher if I was on the sidelines. If I’m not, he’d get on with it.

Hannibal_Smith

meeeeh wrote: »

I don't. I think kids don't need parents constantly hoovering around.

Its not constantly hanging around them. Its being there in case they get hurt. Drama class ain't hurling training.

Hannibal_Smith

jlm29 wrote: »

This. My seven year old would look for a stretcher if I was on the sidelines. If I’m not, he’d get on with it.

Ive comforted injured kids on the sidelines because their parents arent there. Your kids can get injured whether you're there or not.

jlm29

Hannibal_Smith wrote: »

Ive comforted injured kids on the sidelines because their parents arent there. Your kids can get injured whether you're there or not.

I live five minutes away. I’m happy that if I’m not there (I often am anyhow, but not always), and there’s an actual injury, someone will ring me and I’ll be there in under 10 min. If he gets an tap of a ball or falls over his feet, he does need to learn to get on with things. Me hovering over him with a tissue to mop up his tears is really not going to help him.
If he gets injured playing hurling in school, or falls in the yard and bangs his head, I’ll be at work, and it will take longer than 10 min to get to him. I can’t helicopter around my kids all the time, it’s not practical, it’s not fair, and it wouldn’t do them any good.

Digs

My eldest is 5 and in Macra (preschool for GAA) which she loves and we’re pretty sure she likes it enough to progress to a team, she seems to prefer Gaelic to Camogie. My husband brings her Saturday morning and stays, he would anyway, she’s only 5, but there’s a text every week reminding parents it’s not a drop and go, parents have to stay. Which I can understand.

I’m pretty positive if he saw a coach put his hands on her he’d be over before her arse hit the ground.

I was in Supervalu recently and there were people bag packing for another local team. I got chatting to the guy and I mentioned I had 3 girls and we were hoping they’d get into GAA etc
He said that he finds the difference between how the girls and boys are coached is huge. The girls have a much nicer environment whereas the boys, it’s very different. Competitive and quite aggressive. Would most find this to be true?

Hannibal_Smith

jlm29 wrote: »

I live five minutes away. I’m happy that if I’m not there (I often am anyhow, but not always), and there’s an actual injury, someone will ring me and I’ll be there in under 10 min. If he gets an tap of a ball or falls over his feet, he does need to learn to get on with things. Me hovering over him with a tissue to mop up his tears is really not going to help him.
If he gets injured playing hurling in school, or falls in the yard and bangs his head, I’ll be at work, and it will take longer than 10 min to get to him. I can’t helicopter around my kids all the time, it’s not practical, it’s not fair, and it wouldn’t do them any good.

Are you at home while they're training? In those 10 mins whats happening with your kid?

Getting a tap of a ball or falling over is not what I'm talking about. I have comforted other people's kids when theyre not there and the kid has got injured.

Hannibal_Smith

Digs wrote: »

My eldest is 5 and in Macra (preschool for GAA) which she loves and we’re pretty sure she likes it enough to progress to a team, she seems to prefer Gaelic to Camogie. My husband brings her Saturday morning and stays, he would anyway, she’s only 5, but there’s a text every week reminding parents it’s not a drop and go, parents have to stay. Which I can understand.

I’m pretty positive if he saw a coach put his hands on her he’d be over before her arse hit the ground.

I was in Supervalu recently and there were people bag packing for another local team. I got chatting to the guy and I mentioned I had 3 girls and we were hoping they’d get into GAA etc
He said that he finds the difference between how the girls and boys are coached is huge. The girls have a much nicer environment whereas the boys, it’s very different. Competitive and quite aggressive. Would most find this to be true?

In our place the boys and girls are together up until 12 i think? We're u10s and whilst it wouldn't be an even mix of boys and girls it wouldnt be far off. I think we're fairly unique with that though because all the teams we play seem to be boys only.

All the juveniles train on the same night and ive never heard a coach swear at any of them and push them to the ground like the OP, is that the kind of aggression you mean?

We may be spoiled in having non aggressive coaches though because it is a lovely club

jlm29

Hannibal_Smith wrote: »

Are you at home while they're training? In those 10 mins whats happening with your kid?

Getting a tap of a ball or falling over is not what I'm talking about. I have comforted other people's kids when theyre not there and the kid has got injured.

Sometimes I do go home, yes. Much of the time I don’t. To be honest, I think you either didn’t read my last post, or didn’t take it in.

Hannibal_Smith

jlm29 wrote: »

Sometimes I do go home, yes. Much of the time I don’t. To be honest, I think you either didn’t read my last post, or didn’t take it in.

I read your post.and understood it. Its not exactly a complex point you're making. You just have your hand over your ears and are refusing totake onboard what I'm telling you ive seen.

If you're being told kids are getting hurt at training and im not talking about a slight knock and still toddling off home fair enough....but if it was me I'd be rethinking my routine. I have comforted other people's kids when theyve had to come off. Its not my job.

Anyhow thats not the point of the thread...but i would urge parents of young kids to hang around.

jlm29

Hannibal_Smith wrote: »

I read your post.and understood it. Its not exactly a complex point you're making. You just have your hand over your ears and are refusing totake onboard what I'm telling you ive seen.

If you're being told kids are getting hurt at training and im not talking about a slight knock and still toddling off home fair enough....but if it was me I'd be rethinking my routine. I have comforted other people's kids when theyve had to come off. Its not my job.

Anyhow thats not the point of the thread...but i would urge parents of young kids to hang around.

Sorry for the Off topic posts OP, this will be my last.
I sometimes leave my oldest child at training and don’t watch, but I also bring him to school where he plays hurling, and I don’t stay to watch that. He went to cul camp last year, and I certainly wasn’t on the sidelines all day every day watching him. I don’t always stay at his cousins house while he plays in their garden and could fall off their slide. He sometimes goes to the playground with his childminder and I’m not there.
In all of the situations, he could get hurt. He never has, beyond a cut knee, but yes, I do take the risk that he might get hurt and I might not be the one there to comfort him.
I do, however, never leave them anywhere that I’m not happy that there’s a competent, reliable adult there to give him either comfort or minor medical attention if he needs that. I stuck around for a lot of Saturday morning training sessions to be make sure I was confident About this before I ever considered going home for the hour.
I’m not the only parent with that attitude, and I’m certainly not in a minority, in our own club anyhow.

shesty

Do you all hang around for football or rugby training?

By the looks of it locally here (we have all three, GAA, soccer and rugby), most parents don't.

Gymnastics here, most parents don't hang around.Depending on where they live relative to the training place, for some its too far to bother going home.

Roesy

shesty wrote: »

Do you all hang around for football or rugby training?

By the looks of it locally here (we have all three, GAA, soccer and rugby), most parents don't.

Gymnastics here, most parents don't hang around.Depending on where they live relative to the training place, for some its too far to bother going home.

Once my girl was settled I stopped staying around beyond five to ten minutes at the beginning and the same at the end. She is too distracted when I’m there and too busy waving at me or watching to see if I’m watching. I do stay around the area though and will go for a walk around the pitch so I’m never more than 5-6 minutes away. Now I know she’s enjoying it and wants to keep it up I’m happy to put my name down on a rota to help with laces/helmets etc.

Digs

Hannibal_Smith wrote: »

In our place the boys and girls are together up until 12 i think? We're u10s and whilst it wouldn't be an even mix of boys and girls it wouldnt be far off. I think we're fairly unique with that though because all the teams we play seem to be boys only.

All the juveniles train on the same night and ive never heard a coach swear at any of them and push them to the ground like the OP, is that the kind of aggression you mean?

We may be spoiled in having non aggressive coaches though because it is a lovely club

Now to be honest I’m just quoting him from the few minutes I spoke with him! He just maintained they were much harder on the boys so I’m assuming he means swearing and shouting, possibly pressure too. Just thought it was an interesting comment, possibly club specific.

Re the dropping and going. With GAA naturally they’re outdoors on pitches. The coaches are there to coach so if my daughter needed the toilet, she would need one of us there to bring her, across the pitches, the carpark and into the clubhouse etc I wouldn’t want someone I didn’t know bringing her anyway. To be honest until she’s a good bit older there’s no way we’d leave her.