People on Boards who judge other people

Permabear

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Barry Badrinath

Permabear wrote: »

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Becoming Permabear.

Touch me.

:pac:

Solomon Pleasant

This debate is going to continue without reason because no one can win.

Ultimately success is subjective, as are whichever success matrices you choose to judge yourself by. Many people feel successful in one area of life and lacking in success in another area. Each individual can only decide for themselves how they have performed given their own unique circumstances.

steddyeddy

Solomon Pleasant wrote: »

This debate is going to continue without reason because no one can win.

Ultimately success is subjective, as are whichever success matrices you choose to judge yourself by. Many people feel successful in one area of life and lacking in success in another area. Each individual can only decide for themselves how they have performed given their own unique circumstances.

Indeed. One can't make judgements about another person's success.

gizmo81

I think posters are confusing personal achievement with employment achievement. A PhD is a huge achievement, it takes a level of passion and dedication unattainable to many. With that personal achievement there is no guarantee that there will be employment achievement. I know trainee managers in supermarket chains with PhD's and on graduate schemes earning less than 25,000 a year.

This does not diminish their personal achievement in obtaining a PhD.

The criteria for a PhD is you have to make a significant contribution to knowledge with original work. That is an achievement.

Cupatae

Solomon Pleasant wrote: »

This debate is going to continue without reason because no one can win.

Ultimately success is subjective, as are whichever success matrices you choose to judge yourself by. Many people feel successful in one area of life and lacking in success in another area. Each individual can only decide for themselves how they have performed given their own unique circumstances.

Thats that then,

We can consider this thread a success.

Solomon Pleasant

steddyeddy wrote: »

Indeed. One can't make judgements about another person's success.

We can, and do, make judgments on an individual's success. However it's difficult to us to be truly objective as we have the constant narrative of comparing ourselves to them. We also don't know the inner details of a person's life and therefore it's difficult to draw an accurate conclusion as to whether someone is a success or not a success.

pilly

Brendan Bendar wrote:

No use sitting back and expecting others to support you when you will make no effort yourself surely?

I hope you're not referring to me because I look after myself quite well thank you.

Doesn't mean I don't have concern for others less fortunate. And in fact those that work very hard and still have no chance of ever having a stable home.

pilly

Brendan Bendar wrote:

No use sitting back and expecting others to support you when you will make no effort yourself surely?

I hope you're not referring to me because I look after myself quite well thank you.

Doesn't mean I don't have concern for others less fortunate. And in fact those that work very hard and still have no chance of ever having a stable home.

Cupatae

Solomon Pleasant wrote: »

We can, and do, make judgments on an individual's success. However it's difficult to us to be truly objective as we have the constant narrative of comparing ourselves to them. We also don't know the inner details of a person's life and therefore it's difficult to draw an accurate conclusion as to whether someone is a success or not a success.

Its not for us to judge whether a person is a success or not tho. And thats where the problems start when people do that or try to based on their own idea of success. I dont even get why people feel the need to even do that..has to be a flaw in there own character.

Anyone getting on with life, paying their bills, not wanting for anything and feeling contented, tranquil and happy is a roaring success as far as I'm concerned.

A narrow, material-based definition of success diminishes the meaning of the word. Some of the most successful people I've ever known live what some would consider modest lives.

Brendan Bendar

pilly wrote: »

I hope you're not referring to me because I look after myself quite well thank you.

Doesn't mean I don't have concern for others less fortunate. And in fact those that work very hard and still have no chance of ever having a stable home.

Certainly not, I have concern for those less fortunate too, but none for wasters and layabouts.

Hope we cleared that up?

Permabear

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Yourself isit

It's clear that pb's version of success is money. But that makes a drug Lord more successful than a brilliant surgeon, doctor or teacher.

steddyeddy

Permabear wrote: »

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Not to the level you do though.

Permabear

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Cupatae

Permabear wrote: »

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Well atleast now you know why people are "begrudging" you and it aint because of your success lol

Arghus

I'd regard success as feeling like I'm leading a fufilling life. The only problem is it's bloody hard to know what fufillment really is. Maybe figuring it out is the end goal in and of itself.

Solomon Pleasant

This thread appears to have developed into who can make the slyest, most insipid comments towards Permeabear without getting reported..

Arghus

People are rapidly mounting high horses around here to round on PB. I don't agree with some of what he has to say, but janey mac lads, ye've all become very self righteous over the last page or so!

Cupatae

Solomon Pleasant wrote: »

This thread appears to have developed into who can make the slyest, most insipid comments towards Permeabear without getting reported..

Or telling the truth to permabear, depends what view you want to take.

Permabear

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neverever1

I think this thread proves that everyone judges. I suppose if you don't come across as a nice person then people will judge you.

Permabear

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Arghus

Permabear wrote: »

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The irony wasn't lost on me!

steddyeddy

Ah don't be so sensitive. If a begrudging comment is made people are going to criticise it. Especially if that poster complains about people begrudging success.

Cupatae

steddyeddy wrote: »

Ah don't be so sensitive. If a begrudging comment is made people are going to criticise it. Especially if that poster complains about people begrudging success.

They can give it but cant take it!

steddyeddy

whoopsadoodles wrote: »

That's a bit patronising is it not? Suggesting he's not already succesful? Maybe he doesn't own his company yet but that doesn't mean he's not successful.

I have to agree with Eddy. Having worked my way up from the bottom, and being close to others who have done the same (one of whom is the most succesful person I know) there has never been any begrudging words uttered. We don't tend to try to rub success in peoples faces though or look down on people who weren't as fortunate as we were to have had the circumstances that allowed success.

This is it Whoopsy. I only heard "fair play to you". I've been vey lucky with people encouraging me. I haven't heard a discouraging word from people from any background. I've friends from all sorts of backgrounds as well. My closest friends from school are a doctor, painter, teacher a landscape artist and a stay at home father. All get on without a bad word for anyone who wanted to make it.

steddyeddy

Solomon Pleasant wrote: »

There seems to be a definite split in opinion. I'm not sure where the other (rural vs urban division perhaps?) posters are from, but I would be of a similar opinion to Permeabear, who, like myself, is from Donegal (Judging by a recent post on this thread). Perhaps, people's views and opinion surrounding this topic are heavily influenced by their past experiences, the majority of which are determined by where a person comes from.

If you take YouTube sensations for example. Many of them put themselves out there, strive to achieve and get suffer incredibly high levels of abuse as a result. It's just one example but people despising other people for being successful, or attempting to become successful, definitely exists. I'm not saying that it's a majority of people but I've heard and witnessed it far too many times to simply act like it doesn't exist. It generally stems from a bitter jealousy that someone is trying to achieve, or has achieved what you can't.

Maybe but I would think it's the attitude that is attracting the comments rather than the perceived success.

So the poster flew into Donegal from America and attracted comments about success? Is that credible. How exactly was the money flaunted. Walking around Errigal in Armani suits?

Solomon Pleasant

steddyeddy wrote: »

Maybe but I would think it's the attitude that is attracting the comments rather than the perceived success.

So the poster flew into Donegal from America and attracted comments about success? Is that credible. How exactly was the money flaunted. Walking around Errigal in Armani suits?

I can't comment on how Permabear attracted the comments, I can only speak of my own experiences and I know there are people enjoying watching other people fail. They loathe seeing people do better than them - it's a sickening attitude and although you mightn't have directly encountered it, it doesn't mean it hasn't happened to you.