Should parents stop pretending that Santa is real?

DredFX

Article on the Telegraph today (also published on the Irish Examiner, though they deleted it within hours of posting it) reports on a suggestion by a psychologist and social scientist that parents should stop pretending Santa Claus exists because it could hurt their relations with their children.

Psychologist Professor Christopher Boyle and social scientist Dr Kathy McKay also condemn the idea of a "terrifying" North Pole intelligence agency which judges children to be nice or naughty.

Writing in the respected journal The Lancet Psychiatry, they argue: "If they (parents) are capable of lying about something so special and magical, can they be relied upon to continue as the guardians of wisdom and truth?"

A professor from the University of New England in Australia also made the rather insightful claim that:

that adults looked for a chance to be children again.

"The persistence of fandom in stories like Harry Potter, Star Wars and Doctor Who well into adulthood demonstrates this desire to briefly re-enter childhood," she said.

So, lying about Santa can bring progenitor-offspring relations into a serious penumbra.

Anybody here resent their parents for maintaining the great Christmas masquerade? I sure as hell do.

GreenFolder2

It's preparing them for disappointment when they discover politicians work mostly like Santa Claus and make wild promises that are never delivered.

Winterlong

Santa is not real?

DredFX

DredFX wrote: »

Anybody here resent their parents for maintaining the great Christmas masquerade? I sure as hell do.

If that's the sort of thing you resent them for then they must have been bloody good parents!

davo2001

Yes, all those extra presents from Santa really damaged me in later life, and don't even get me started about them trying to get me to behave! :rolleyes:

DredFX

Deleted User wrote: »

If that's the sort of thing you resent them for then they must have been bloody good parents!

They got me a pony in 2002!

silverharp

I think its weird that some parents push it to 9 10 11 , that just gas lighting the poor kids. Up to 6 or 7 is fine and if they come to the conclusion its not real tell them well done for figuring it out

J. Marston

4 year olds need to start living in the real world.

jameorahiely

Yes, especially those hypocrite atheists

Shenshen

Hang on a moment, I'll get the popcorn.

Tombo2001

If that's all ye have to worry about.....

RacoonQueen

DredFX wrote: »

Anybody here resent their parents for maintaining the great Christmas masquerade? I sure as hell do.

No. My parents were great at the Santa/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy things.

And gingerbread men...when they go us gingerbread men as after dinner treats they used to hide them around the house for us to find and tell us the gingerbread men had run away so we couldn't eat them.

Such innocent times.

GreenFolder2

Being a sceptic since a very early age, I basically ridiculed my parents for suggesting that an enormously fat man could fit down a narrow chimney.

Also, I caught them putting Christmas presents under the tree.

I didn't really believe in Santa once I got past the learning to talk phase.

_Brian

This **** comes up year after year.

Kids are only kids for a very short time, where's the harm in a bit of make believe that reaches into their home and makes them happy.

I'm overwhelmingly greatful to my parents for all the fun Christmases we had as a family, proper magic times to look back on.

I'm on a position where my eldest is just a few years out of santa but my younger is a believer. My eldest was also greatful for the Christmas gifts she godly and enjoys being part of the magic helping he sister get ready for santa coming.

Far as I can see is only miserable pricks want to destroy the whole santa magic for young kids and I think they should be ashamed.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Absolutely not. Christmas was so special when Santa was real.

ballsymchugh

i'd say it's great craic wherever you are.

Tombo2001

Children love fantasy.

The time that they can figure out for themselves that a rotund man in a red suit couldn't actually fit down the chimney is about the right time to stop believing in Santa anyways.....

The other thing is that its a good way to give them possessions and control over things. In a gentle way, it gives them a bit of power in the parent-child relationship. This is my dolly, Santa gave it to me, I am in charge of it.

DredFX

_Brian wrote: »

Far as I can see is only miserable pricks want to destroy the whole santa magic for young kids and I think they should be ashamed.

Bunch of festiviphobes.

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Absolutely not. Christmas was so special when Santa was real.

If a little duplicitous.

PabloAndRoy

Our 11 year old recently said to me "I know that he's not real. Just don't tell mum that I know, she might be upset".

givyjoe

DredFX wrote: »

Article on the Telegraph today (also published on the Irish Examiner, though they deleted it within hours of posting it) reports on a suggestion by a psychologist and social scientist that parents should stop pretending Santa Claus exists because it could hurt their relations with their children.



A professor from the University of New England in Australia also made the rather insightful claim that:



So, lying about Santa can bring progenitor-offspring relations into a serious penumbra.

Anybody here resent their parents for maintaining the great Christmas masquerade? I sure as hell do.

Same applies to Jebus and the like..

meeeeh

Yeah whatever. And tomorrow someone else will publish a study that Santa lark encourages imagination. Was it in about 50% of studies published in respectable journals that results were not conclusive when study was reproduced.

Dirty Dingus McGee

No.It's a bit of harmless fun that shouldn't be over analysed by people who could be doing something productive.

Dirty Dingus McGee

GreenFolder2 wrote: »

Being a sceptic since a very early age, I basically ridiculed my parents for suggesting that an enormously fat man could fit down a narrow chimney.

Also, I caught them putting Christmas presents under the tree.

I didn't really believe in Santa once I got past the learning to talk phase.

Aren't you great.We put you in charge of everything and I'd safely say all the worlds problems would be solved very quickly.

emeldc

GreenFolder2 wrote: »

Being a sceptic since a very early age, I basically ridiculed my parents for suggesting that an enormously fat man could fit down a narrow chimney.

Also, I caught them putting Christmas presents under the tree.

I didn't really believe in Santa once I got past the learning to talk phase.

You must be great crack

pilly

Ah no, I loved Santa and sometimes like to think he still exists and is going to bring me something lovely.

I loved Miracle on 34th Street and nearly believed again.

Kids grow up too quick now. Let them enjoy the magic of their imaginations.

Mint Sauce

No, its part of the Magic of Christmas. Putting all the commercialisation of it aside, I love chatting to my younger relations about what Santa is bringing, or has bought, or with friends/family my age, buying for their kids. Even the kid in the 37 38 year old me, has my imaginary Santa List.

Kids innocence is lost all to quickly these days. Lets hold on to some of the mysteries and excitment for them.

PabloAndRoy

GreenFolder2 wrote: »

Being a sceptic since a very early age, I basically ridiculed my parents for suggesting that an enormously fat man could fit down a narrow chimney.

Also, I caught them putting Christmas presents under the tree.

I didn't really believe in Santa once I got past the learning to talk phase.

I blame the parents for this disrespectful behaviour.

meeeeh

Btw what is so wrong about teaching kids that everyone lies?

whoopsadoodles

Resent my parents?

On the contrary.

I am so grateful for all the memories of magical Christmases.

I still believe in santa and always will.

buck65

I remember waiting for Santa and hearing bells back in the day, looking out my window, sleepless nights and all that lark I suppose I was around 10 when it all came crashing down. Christmas was never the same again for me - until I had kids, kids change everything!

eviltwin

How about everyone just fcuk off and mind their own business. I choose to do the whole Santa thing. I have a teenager who has managed to learn the truth and survive, no trauma in our house. No trauma when I discovered the truth. Stay out of how people parent their kids.

GLaDOS

I've never heard of anyone resenting their parents over Santa. Most kids figure it out themselves.

Mint Sauce

whoopsadoodles wrote: »

Resent my parents?

On the contrary.

I am so grateful for all the memories of magical Christmases.

I still believe in santa and always will.

So whats Santa bringing this year Whoopsy?

jimgoose

This is the kind of thing that crops up when you run out of sabre-tooth tigers to run from. :pac:

Omackeral

He's no less believable than God and yet we're made to swear an oath on the bible and in weddings and such. Let kids be kids!

mickoneill31

Those psychologists must have had a **** childhood.
I don't know anybody who resents their parents because they believed in santa. I have fond memories of Christmas in my childhood and have nothing but love for my parents as they tried to make my Christmas special.

In the article it talks about a North pole intelligence gathering service. What planet are they on that they think that this is something a 7 or 8 year old worries about.
Sure if they worry about that wait till they start thinking about religion. The worst santa would do is give you a lump of coal.

Pherekydes

My brother (older by 6 years) gave the game away one Christmas, but I had found out the year before but kept quiet about it.

Funny, the nice pressies dried up after that.

None of my own believe any more...:o:





...which is good as the youngest is 17. :pac:



But now we have to keep up the charade one more time, as our 3 year-old grandson will be in the house on Christmas night.

Mortpourvelo

I found out when seeing me dad putting together the brother's train set.

Says he "I'm Father Christmases apprentice".

Not falling for that one!!!

Yes. I told the younger brother. I'm evil

osarusan

If Santa Claus was good enough for our ancestors 10,000 years ago, it's good enough for me.

newacc2015

Dirty Dingus McGee wrote: »

No.It's a bit of harmless fun that shouldn't be over analysed by people who could be doing something productive.

I don't think it is harmless fun though. There is plenty of studies that find children develop their spending habits at a very young age. I dont think it is particularly helpful for someone to be telling their 10/11 year old that a non-existent man brings them whatever they want rather than their parents hard work. How is a child supposed to be conservative around money when they dont know where it is being spent?

It is important to keep Christmas magical etc. But it is more important that your children learns from a young age how to manage money. Christmas is a few days a year, bad spending habits **** you up for life.

whisky_galore

Tombo2001 wrote: »

Children love presents.

Fixed.

Goya

I budget very well - always have done, and I believed in Santa until I was 10. It's up to parents to teach this (and the person themselves). Santa doesn't have to have a bearing on this at all.

Wow the bit in the article about the North Pole intelligence gathering :pac: looks like an Onion satire.

Arne_Saknussem

GreenFolder2 wrote: »

Being a sceptic since a very early age, I basically ridiculed my parents for suggesting that an enormously fat man could fit down a narrow chimney.

Also, I caught them putting Christmas presents under the tree.

I didn't really believe in Santa once I got past the learning to talk phase.

We're all very impressed with you.

Olishi4

No I don't think people would resent their parents for letting them believe that Santa is real. I have some really great Christmas memories. I think I just started to cop on at about 9 or 10 and then said it to them and it really wasn't that shocking.

Part of growing up is slowly realising that your parents are people too and not the "guardians of wisdom and truth" but just doing their best.

marcbrophy

A friend of mine was telling me what her son wanted from "Santa" this year.
In quotes because he's a teenager and doesn't believe anyway.

Honestly, the sheer cost of the items alone was probably more than my disposable income for the year

When I was growing up, Santa got me A present, and a surprise if I was good!
I was always good!

razorblunt

I've just had my yearly call with my Dad asking how Santa will know I'm not at home but at my Dad's house this Xmas.


I'm 31.


31 years of lies and hurt and awesome, awesome presents.

seamus

As far as I can tell the article is all philosophising about what "could" or "might" happen, with absolutely no evidence to back up any of their suggestions. Go and gather some evidence before making suggestions about what should and shouldn't be done.

The fact that they think a child will consider an "intelligence gathering agency" goes to show how utterly out of touch these people are. Children don't think at scale. How does he do it? Magic, innit.

The one thing I find a bit depressing though is the amount of people who say that the "good" presents dried up when they found about Santa. It's like the parents felt obliged to stretch themselves to maintain the illusion, but when it was gone just reverted to socks and crap.
I always got decent pressies, when Santa left the pressies just became more focussed because I was asked exactly what I wanted.

gossamer

Do children in this day and age still believe in Santa anyway? More-so in the 5-11 bracket.The modern world continues to chip away at innocence and with such ease of access to the internet, I kind of thought that at this stage it was an act put on. Mostly to wrangle a decent present out of their parents that they wouldn't have a chance of getting otherwise. Or maybe I'm just a cynic.

vicwatson

osarusan wrote: »

If Santa Claus was good enough for our ancestors 10,000 years ago, it's good enough for me.

Huh? I thought Coca Cola invented him

Shenshen

Flimpson wrote: »

I budget very well - always have done, and I believed in Santa until I was 10. It's up to parents to teach this (and the person themselves). Santa doesn't have to have a bearing on this at all.

Wow the bit in the article about the North Pole intelligence gathering :pac: looks like an Onion satire.

I'm not sure how I feel about this, to be honest.
Perosnally, I'm from a country that doesn't do Santa, so it was never a big issue in our house. Santa was one of those odd yankee things you'd see in Hollywood films, nothing more.

But to believe in it until you're 10? I had my first period when I was 10...

vicwatson

Shenshen wrote: »

I'm not sure how I feel about this, to be honest.
Perosnally, I'm from a country that doesn't do Santa, so it was never a big issue in our house. Santa was one of those odd yankee things you'd see in Hollywood films, nothing more.

But to believe in it until you're 10? I had my first period when I was 10...

Well Merry Bloody Christmas to you too !