If you owned a pub...

Zebra3

mynamejeff wrote: »

they do 5 liter pints

Impossible.

PARlance

Armchair Andy wrote: »

What would you call it every other day of the week?

The Budget Inn, they're well able to make it last.

LordSutch

'The widows stubble'.

Freehouse, with real cask Ale on tap!

Sgt Hartman

Something really arty farty and hipstery, like "Pygmalion" or "Dostoyevsky's Bane". It would have extremely basic whitewashed interior and decor. Craft beers would be served in clay tankards for €7 a pop with background music from acts like Jagwar Ma, Passion Pit, Jungle, Belle and Sebastien etc. Toilets would basically be converted chamber pots.

TPD

Buncrana has the "Drift Inn", which is clever enough. I think if I had a pub I'd call it "The Black Dog" or "The Hair Of The Dog". Not a dog owner

pilly

TPD wrote: »

Buncrana has the "Drift Inn", which is clever enough. I think if I had a pub I'd call it "The Black Dog" or "The Hair Of The Dog". Not a dog owner

Is The Black Dog not another description of depression? Wouldn't encourage me to go in now.

TPD

pilly wrote: »

TPD wrote: »

Buncrana has the "Drift Inn", which is clever enough. I think if I had a pub I'd call it "The Black Dog" or "The Hair Of The Dog". Not a dog owner

Is The Black Dog not another description of depression? Wouldn't encourage me to go in now.

With the state of mental health services in this country, I'm sure I'd have plenty of customers

corner of hells

The Lemon Orchard.
As I would own it , I would be known as the Elder Lemon.

pilly

TPD wrote: »

With the state of mental health services in this country, I'm sure I'd have plenty of customers

Yeah but they wouldn't be much craic!

Sleepy

The Nerdcave.

Craft beer on draft, no Sky Sports, decorate it with lego / comic book props and stick in a few old arcade machines.

I reckon it'd be a goldmine in the right location.

Glenster

Sleepy wrote: »

The Nerdcave.

Craft beer on draft, no Sky Sports, decorate it with lego / comic book props and stick in a few old arcade machines.

I reckon it'd be a goldmine in the right location.

I don't know. Cassidy's in Town is a little like that, but when I worked near it, all the lads from work avoided it like the plague. Like it was the weirdest place they'd ever seen.

Sleepy

I've never heard of that. Must try it out!

BBDBB

Walk the dog

Mena Mitty

Visited a pub in Cork city back in the 80's called the Whiff'n'Puff and thought it was a great name at the time. Still think that, so I think that's what I'd call my pub.

Somewhere you can whiff, puff, sniff, snort and swally in peace with no telly :-)

RiderOnTheStorm

My uncle always maintained that if he had a pub he would call it The Cock & Bull...... 'cause thats all that would be discussed therein.

If I had a pub it would be modeled on my fav ones from the 80s..... Where when we walked in and held up 4 fingers (while still in doorway) the barman would put on 4 Guinness, no need to wait 6 deep at the baror even speak. Happy days.

B00!

what ale's ya

Atoms for Peace

jackwigan wrote: »

You've been beaten to that one...

http://www.firkinpubs.com/

How a about calling it "the mirkin" instead?

W123-80's

The Slipit Inn

myshirt

W123-80's wrote: »

The Slipit Inn

Liquor in the front and poker in the rear?

pajo1981

A Cock In Cider

veryangryman

I'd call my pub the Assassin

The logo would be two asses. (Ass Ass Inn)

Sells itself!

pilly

veryangryman wrote: »

I'd call my pub the Assassin

The logo would be two asses. (Ass Ass Inn)

Sells itself!

Would that be a gay bar?

donegaLroad

ShooterSF wrote: »

The hideout. No TV. Arcade machines, only with two player and up options. Boardgames. Basically social props rather than goggle boxes Oh and no kids.

There is a bar called the Hideout in Letterkenny.


hows about 'The Stumble Inn'

MilesMorales1

I'd probably try and do it like wetherspoons and have all drinks at €3 or less. Don't know how I'd make any money off it mind, probably lose money, but thats what I always complain about with pubs so I'd try to be the change I wanna see. And serve chips no matter what time of the night.
Have a decent smoking area, don't let it contaminate the non smoking parts, but when I was a smoker it always bugged me you either had to step out into the street, or the smoking area was often around the bins or whatever.
Nice beer garden.
Pub quizzes.
No ****ing tv or ****ty music pounding through it so you can't hear yourself think.

Noveight

The White Hare, I like bar names with animals in 'em.

maudgonner

Noveight wrote: »

I like bar names with animals in 'em.

The Skull and Swallow

Liam28

pilly wrote: »

Would that be a gay bar?

There is/was a gay bar in San Francisco called The White Swallow.

LCD

Treadmill & Cockroach

B00!

I'd Tap That

harry Bailey esq

Harry's hideout. It would be a shebeen/unlicensed joint catering for scumbags barred from everywhere else. I'd run it as a 'free trade zone'. Drinks would only make up for a tiny portion of the menu,and for a small fee paid to the management,hawkers could sell their wares freely and without hindrance or harassment from lawmen,customs and revenue officials and most importantly rival hawkers. Smoking would be compulsory naturally, something that I'd personally enforce.Non smokers can f*ck off and drink somewhere else,we don't roll out the red carpet for that lot,although quite a few have left the premises rolled up in a carpet,usually featuring at least a small spattering of red.Soliciting for the purpose of prostitution,although frowned upon by some of our older patrons,is not banned. The team at Harry's prides itself on liaising with our regulars to enhance the experience we provide,because without them we wouldn't exist.We are also mindful of the often sad circumstances of the women who choose to pursue a career in the sex industry,and quite rightly take the stance that nobody can judge another without walking a mile in their shoes.For if we did,tumbleweed rolling through the hallowed halls of Harry's would be a common enough sight.With this in mind,sex workers can pay a small waiver and tout for business unimpeded.This arrangement is under constant review however as brothel keeping carries severe financial penalties and possibly prison sentences,which would be detrimental to Harry's.The decor is themed on a nineteenth century opium den,with many original artifacts from the era.For the more avid opiate historians, usually liverpudlian visitors,heroin is available in the gift shop.Tinfoil,lighters, milkshakes and jellybabies/wine gums etc are complimentary,and a team of waitresses in authentic attire are always on hand to assist users sampling the product in the opulent surroundings of our house tasting rooms. Unfortunately,at the current time,injecting drug users are barred.This is due to objections from regular punters and some minor hygiene issues,we are currently attempting to come to a resolve that will be deemed acceptable to all parties involved and sincerely apologise for any inconvenience caused. While we like to extend the hand of friendship to all,our door policy is fairly strict so we can maintain a tidy house.
As mentioned,non smokers are not welcome.We don't serve clergymen of any denomination,serving members of any police force from any jurisdiction worldwide.Travellers are welcome,new age travellers however are not.
Journalists are barred.
Freemasons are barred.
Andy from Sligo is barred.
People under 40 with beards are barred,except on the 1st Sunday of the month,when we host 'gents night' in solidarity with our lgbt customers.
Football jerseys are banned,although they can bought at a fraction of the recommended retail price from 'Spanish Cormac' who is usually to be found at the poker machines but they mustn't be worn on the premises.
Vegans are barred,vegetarians are welcome.
Footwear must be worn at all times(see new age travellers)
Solicitors generally don't gain admission,but are allowed in if a trusted patron feels that they need councel.
We no longer allow firearms in the bar.However they can on occasion be purchased behind the bar.
Children are barred.
Pets are welcome,but must be supervised by the owner.
Guide dogs are not permitted however,as blind people are barred.
Natives of Co Cavan are barred.
A warm welcome will be given to anyone not on the above list.Finally the team at Harry's are grateful to all our customers for the support over the years,often through some very trying times.You guys are the best! We also look forward to seeing friends we haven't met,and we will do our utmost to ensure that we make your first visit a memorable one.