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boarding school

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    #122
    kerry cow
    Registered Users Posts: 1,301 ✭✭✭kerry cow


    Agree .its a huge cost after tax and we have just moved home to start farming and I am at great exposure due to new start up .will see what happens in next few months


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    #123
    El_Duderino 09
    Registered Users Posts: 20,028 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    kerry cow wrote:
    They do get the results but the problem is ... me .... Will he become too independent and abandon us at home and his 3 sisters ? Coming from a farm it's in our dna to have our family near by .
    steddyeddy wrote:
    Do you not think your son will get into UCD or Trinity sans Boarding school? It might be a waste of money.

    More to the point would be whether Kerry Cow would be happy with their son going to ucd or Trinity if they want them to be nearby. Dublin won't be near Kerry in 5 years time either.

    Of course the child could go to uni without going to boarding school. I suppose the real question is how long the child's mother wants him to remain completely dependent on her. Isn't independence usually a desirable trait in children and one parents actively try to encourage?


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    #124
    steddyeddy
    Registered Users Posts: 27,564 ✭✭✭✭steddyeddy


    El_Duderino 09 wrote: »
    More to the point would be whether Kerry Cow would be happy with their son going to ucd or Trinity if they want them to be nearby. Dublin won't be near Kerry in 5 years time either.

    Of course the child could go to uni without going to boarding school. I suppose the real question is how long the child's mother wants him to remain completely dependent on her. Isn't independence usually a desirable trait in children and one parents actively try to encourage?

    Yes I agree. It's healthy for the child to learn independence and it does sound like the child wants to stretch his wings.

    On the cost issue I think it's worth considering if it is or isn't a waste of money. Many on here have said that boarding school offers no advantage.


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    #125
    El_Duderino 09
    Registered Users Posts: 20,028 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    steddyeddy wrote:
    On the cost issue I think it's worth considering if it is or isn't a waste of money. Many on here have said that boarding school offers no advantage.

    I think it would take a fair bit of bending the truth to say boarding school offers no advantage. If you believed that i doubt you would have started so many threads about boarding schools and how boardings schools offer advantages based on wealth etc.

    I think it takes a commitment to the child from the parents too (beyond the considerable financial commitment). I know lads who wanted to go to boarding school but they still bawled to their parents to bring them home at some point. If the mother doesn't want the child to become independent, it would be too easy to give in and just take them out the first time they cry down the phone. If both child and parents aren't willing to stay the course then its likely to be a big waste of money and unsettle the child by switching school to boarding and then back home. Some children aren't suited to boarding and that's fine. The school will offer guidance on that along with the child

    Maybe boarding school isn't for the mother in this case.


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    #126
    Parchment
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,203 ✭✭✭Parchment


    Knew some guys who were in a boarding school near where we lived when i was younger - totally socially inept. No idea how to act around girls and they lead a sheltered life there.


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    #127
    steddyeddy
    Registered Users Posts: 27,564 ✭✭✭✭steddyeddy


    There must be studies on the effect of boarding school on children and teens?


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    #128
    El_Duderino 09
    Registered Users Posts: 20,028 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    Parchment wrote:
    Knew some guys who were in a boarding school near where we lived when i was younger - totally socially inept. No idea how to act around girls and they lead a sheltered life there.


    While that's probably mostly down to the individuals you knew, there's definitely some truth in that. They know more about other fellas and not as much about women. If the lads you knew didn't interact well with fellas either then they were probably socially inept in general.

    If it was an all boys school then they're surrounded by lads all week. They don't have the simple interactions with women in school, on the bus etc. So they're bound to be one step behind the other lads while they're away. With that said most fellas make up for it as soon as they get a chance. Any difference will disappear soon after they leave the school. Nothing to worry about in the medium term but it's one of those trade offs you need to consider.


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    #129
    El_Duderino 09
    Registered Users Posts: 20,028 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    steddyeddy wrote:
    There must be studies on the effect of boarding school on children and teens?

    Imagine the confounding variables. Wealth, socioeconomic backgrounds, familial attitude towards education​, family support Vs school support, quality of teachers, distractions in the environment. And even then the findings would be welcomed by nobody


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    #130
    steddyeddy
    Registered Users Posts: 27,564 ✭✭✭✭steddyeddy


    El_Duderino 09 wrote: »
    Imagine the confounding variables. Wealth, socioeconomic backgrounds, familial attitude towards education​, family support Vs school support, quality of teachers, distractions in the environment. And even then the findings would be welcomed by nobody

    That's not how research works. You account for the variables where you can. Otherwise social science or psychology would be useless. With respect to the variables we can be sure that socioeconomic background would be similar.

    One simple experiment would be to assess the impact of students who moved from state or private school to boarding school. We know from studies that a move from state to private often is correlated with a rise in grades.

    Just conduct similar studies on boarding school pupils with the added investigation of "psychological effects of parental directed separation". My grandmother had the unusual situation of being educated by French nuns in a boarding school. She loved it but then again they were different times.


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    #131
    Mena Mitty
    Registered Users Posts: 5,959 ✭✭✭Mena Mitty


    'Founders Day' was a big day of celebration...the school choir sang a few songs and there was an extra bit of meat on the plate at dinnertime.


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    #132
    Merkin
    Registered Users Posts: 8,230 ✭✭✭Merkin


    I went to boarding school and view it as a positive experience, made some lifelong friends who I still value as close friends.

    Am also incredibly close to my family so they didn't send me because they hated me, more to give me what they considered a good opportunity. My Dad had boarded too.

    If your son is enthusiastic and you can afford it then go for it.


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    #133
    El_Duderino 09
    Registered Users Posts: 20,028 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    steddyeddy wrote:
    Just conduct similar studies on boarding school pupils with the added investigation of "psychological effects of parental directed separation".

    Plus the effect of peers taking the palace of family. It would be difficult alright.

    It would completely depend on what you define as benefits and how you weight them. Academic and social differences would be very difficult to measure.


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    #134
    kerry cow
    Registered Users Posts: 1,301 ✭✭✭kerry cow


    If you look at the school tables the boarding school perform in the top 10 or so year on year .They do get the results .If you look at any private schools that take in solely 5th and 6th years from state schools and prep then for the leaving , all grades improve substantially for each student .
    The environment you study and socialise in contributes greatly .


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    #135
    steddyeddy
    Registered Users Posts: 27,564 ✭✭✭✭steddyeddy


    kerry cow wrote: »
    If you look at the school tables the boarding school perform in the top 10 or so year on year .They do get the results .If you look at any private schools that take in solely 5th and 6th years from state schools and prep then for the leaving , all grades improve substantially for each student .
    The environment you study and socialise in contributes greatly .

    Of course it does. People wouldn't pay otherwise. It does depend on what your son wants to do though. Does he have an idea yet?


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    #136
    steddyeddy
    Registered Users Posts: 27,564 ✭✭✭✭steddyeddy


    El_Duderino 09 wrote: »
    Plus the effect of peers taking the palace of family. It would be difficult alright.

    It would completely depend on what you define as benefits and how you weight them. Academic and social differences would be very difficult to measure.

    Well as I said if you use the same kid, pre and post school change then it should be straightforward.


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    #137
    El_Duderino 09
    Registered Users Posts: 20,028 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    steddyeddy wrote:
    Well as I said if you use the same kid, pre and post school change then it should be straightforward.

    Kids change so much in that time of their lives that individual differences would account fora good portion of any difference you find.

    Social norms are completely different in boarding schools. Peer influence is major influence on teenagers. Measuring outcomes is one thing, attributing cause is another thing completely


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    #138
    spurious
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 27,139 CMod ✭✭✭✭spurious


    steddyeddy wrote: »
    Of course it does. People wouldn't pay otherwise. <snip>

    They also don't take the duffers who might mess up their results, but deflect them elsewhere.
    All schools would have great results if we could pick and choose the entrants.

    Re boarding schools in general, I can see why they might suit some teenagers, but I think it's unnecessarily cruel to send young children to them.


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    #139
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    steddyeddy wrote: »
    There must be studies on the effect of boarding school on children and teens?

    Boarding School Syndrome...

    https://www.theguardian.com/books/2015/jun/08/boarding-school-syndrome-joy-schaverien-review


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    #140
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 26,052 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Boarding School Syndrome...

    https://www.theguardian.com/books/2015/jun/08/boarding-school-syndrome-joy-schaverien-review

    That's a bygone era, schools are very different now and the days of sending six year olds to school by parents who themselves were sent to school at six are over. There is no comparison between the schools of even a few decades ago to them today.

    From personal experience of a well established British boarding school, I can think of four girls in my year who shouldn't have been there. That they were left there was a failing of their parents, who would probably have left them with staff at home if they weren't away boarding.

    The vast majority of us would have very positive experiences and memories, although everything will have some drawbacks.

    The old system was barbaric, luckily we're all more enlightened now.


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    #141
    freshpopcorn
    Registered Users Posts: 30,322 ✭✭✭✭freshpopcorn


    If he wants to go send him if you can afford it. It would be my idea of hell to be honest but I know others would love it.
    The funny thing is some of the biggest waster I ever met went to a well known boarding school. However your kid sounds very academic and will succeed where ever he goes to school. Just make sure he knows that he isn't walking into a Utopia and he will probably encounter messers, bullies, druggies, etc at boarding school and the main difference is he'll be living at them. Messers/bullies can all get on well academically as well if they want.


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