stupid sh!t you fuss over

Sheep Lover · 11-09-2015 6:30pm

asherbassad wrote: »

If my girlfriend serves me food that goes with tea (sandwich, fryup, beans on toast) and doesn't bring the tea at the same time, I explode*. Especially if the food is hot food and I have to wait for the tea and so the food starts going cold.

And before you suggest that I could just start eating the food I reply "NO NO NO"

You can't start eating "tea" food without tea. The first bite HAS to be taken with the first swig of tea. I can tolerate her saying "tea's on it's way" as she serves the grub and the tea is on the counter and she obviously brought the food and the utensils so her hands were full....that I can handle. But if she serves the food and says "tea's on it's way" and then I hear her clicking on the kettle....there's FUCKING WAR!!!

(*) I don't really explode, I just whine like a bitch and she says "ah shut the fuck up, it's coming!"

I'd give her the sack in fairness, that must be grounds for dismissal.

Luxie · 11-09-2015 7:47pm

KatW4 wrote: »

Just remembered another one. If I'm buying anything in the shop, I always go for one at the back. I never pick the one at the front. It's a habit I picked up from my mum and I've no idea why she does it!

Likely it might a longer sell by date at the back

Notavirus.exe · 11-09-2015 7:53pm

Luxie wrote: »

Likely it might a longer sell by date at the back

Better condition as well. People have a habit of touching and squeezing things before finally deciding not to buy them.

Lia_lia · 11-09-2015 7:58pm

This is like "reasons why I have OCD" thread"..!

I can't wear socks that don't match. Even if they're both black but from a different shop. Usually can tell by the length, pattern, thickness etc..

asherbassad · 11-09-2015 8:01pm

Sheep Lover wrote: »

I'd give her the sack in fairness, that must be grounds for dismissal.

I'm in agreement. Rapine and a famous thrashing with my ivory cane should thwart this unacceptable behaviour.

tomwaterford · 11-09-2015 8:04pm

Lia_lia wrote: »

This is like "reasons why I have OCD" thread"..!

I can't wear socks that don't match. Even if they're both black but from a different shop. Usually can tell by the length, pattern, thickness etc..

Would you not band them together when washing them with an elastic band like most people do to prevent them getting mixed up??

Lia_lia · 11-09-2015 8:21pm

^ yea, I do! But a few still get mixed up.

shugy · 11-09-2015 8:23pm

Life!

KatW4 · 11-09-2015 8:31pm

I have to eat all the orange smarties last. I get annoyed if I accidentally eat one in the middle of my packet!

nathang20 · 11-09-2015 9:25pm

I have to tun off all visible switches that aren't being used.

justchecked · 11-09-2015 10:48pm

I have to contort myself when taking a dump - due to the 'hot spot'.

The hot spot is not the anus as some might presume but rather the part of the toilet seat that makes contact with your sausage if you're not careful.

I realized one day while in a public toilet that if my giblets, more specifically *the area above my helmet, was resting against/making contact with this part of the toilet seat then other men's probably were too.

I vigorously washed my tainted tackle immediately in the sink, a practice I continue at home to this day - psychological scarring will do that to a man.

* x indicates the general area. pm for more detailed photos.
8===x=D

(not to scale)

RDM_83 again · 11-09-2015 11:02pm

tomwaterford wrote: »

Would you not band them together when washing them with an elastic band like most people do to prevent them getting mixed up??

Most people do this :eek:

kylith · 12-09-2015 12:03am

RDM_83 again wrote: »

Most people do this :eek:

Nobody does this.

Teflon Ron · 12-09-2015 1:00pm

Shoes/runners on the sofa or poof drive me insane! I can't abide it. I just can't. Things you wear outdoors and especially in pub bathrooms etc should NOT touch the sofa!

Capt'n Midnight · 12-09-2015 2:08pm

mattP wrote: »

At night I won't go into a room if the light is on and the curtains are open :c I turn off the light, stealthily go close the curtains and turn the light back on :F

Is that because of what happened to you in the 'joy the last time you got caught burgling ?

Heckler · 12-09-2015 3:54pm

asherbassad wrote: »

If my girlfriend serves me food that goes with tea (sandwich, fryup, beans on toast) and doesn't bring the tea at the same time, I explode*. Especially if the food is hot food and I have to wait for the tea and so the food starts going cold.

And before you suggest that I could just start eating the food I reply "NO NO NO"

You can't start eating "tea" food without tea. The first bite HAS to be taken with the first swig of tea. I can tolerate her saying "tea's on it's way" as she serves the grub and the tea is on the counter and she obviously brought the food and the utensils so her hands were full....that I can handle. But if she serves the food and says "tea's on it's way" and then I hear her clicking on the kettle....there's FUCKING WAR!!!

(*) I don't really explode, I just whine like a bitch and she says "ah shut the fuck up, it's coming!"

Sandwich and tea no bother. But any hot food needs to be served with a cold drink. Fry up=cold glass of milk. How can you even wash down all that with a hot cup of tea ?!!

kylith · 12-09-2015 4:40pm

Heckler wrote: »

Sandwich and tea no bother. But any hot food needs to be served with a cold drink. Fry up=cold glass of milk. How can you even wash down all that with a hot cup of tea ?!!

Very easily. In fact I'd go so far as to say that the tea should be near stewed with a fry, to help with the hangover cure.

ToddyDoody · 12-09-2015 4:42pm

People having planning permission

Noobas2 · 12-09-2015 6:47pm

Ive had to pay for sex the seven or so times Ive had it...in my lifetime. Sad but true. Where did it all wrong. Bitter doesn't describe it. Im married to my hand now. The pigs know and all, they say 'take it handy'

whupdedo · 13-09-2015 11:16am

Noobas2 wrote: »

Ive had to pay for sex the seven or so times Ive had it...in my lifetime. Sad but true. Where did it all wrong. Bitter doesn't describe it. Im married to my hand now. The pigs know and all, they say 'take it handy'

You pay for sex with pigs ? Or did I pick you up wrong

Robsweezie · 13-09-2015 1:31pm

whupdedo wrote: »

You pay for sex with pigs ? Or did I pick you up wrong

pigs = the guards

I presume, but you know, stranger things have happened
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=WqNMjZpSbnU

justchecked · 13-09-2015 4:18pm

eebow wrote: »

Shoes/runners on the sofa or poof drive me insane! I can't abide it. I just can't. Things you wear outdoors and especially in pub bathrooms etc should NOT touch the sofa!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qt1r73mYfKY

quickbeam · 13-09-2015 4:23pm

My friend refuses to make tea unless the water is 100% boiled. Like if it takes ten seconds to walk across the kitchen after the kettle has switched off, she'll bring it back up to boil again for the sake of the 0.00001% it would have cooled in that time. Drives me nuts.

Capt'n Midnight · 14-09-2015 10:43am

quickbeam wrote: »

My friend refuses to make tea unless the water is 100% boiled. Like if it takes ten seconds to walk across the kitchen after the kettle has switched off, she'll bring it back up to boil again for the sake of the 0.00001% it would have cooled in that time. Drives me nuts.

TBH you should only make tea with freshly aerated water. Tell her. So now she'll have to worry about emptying and reboiling the kettle every time.

asherbassad · 14-09-2015 10:50am

nathang20 wrote: »

I have to tun off all visible switches that aren't being used.

Well if they're ON then they are being used, no? Unless you're talking about lights on where nobody's in the room and everyone turns them off.

stupid sh!t you fuss over

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