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Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 345 ✭✭freudiangirl


    Definitely good, slotted right back in. Couple of moments of "how do I...." but otherwise it's fine. Nothing changed. Even my postit note listing incomplete jobs when I was leaving was still on my desk

    Delighted


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 345 ✭✭freudiangirl


    Advice needed re Disassociation? I have had not so major issues in past with this and feeling I am present physically but not mentally and fully. I just feel like I haven't been 100%there for past while. It getting frustrating and actually bringing me down.
    During the weekend, I had a weird experience with feeling like I was in a different reality but can't make sense of it. I was awake but it was very vivid and real yet feel like I had no control over the whole thing. This has actually freaked me out majorly.

    All advice/information appreciated?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,877 ✭✭✭heyday30


    Joya wrote: »
    really sorry to hear that, if it makes it easier for you you're not alone in this.. among other things I happen to have this too..
    my therapist sent me to OA meetings its good to hear how other people cope..
    have bulimic eating disorder meaning going few kilos up and down in a very short period of time but two years ago with my depression it went over the moon
    im managing it now more or less.. meaning phases of more then phases of less.. sometimes there's nothing i can do about it but wait for the coin to turn...

    Sorry to hear joya x

    I think for a lot of people food issues Go hand in hand with depression / mood disorders.
    its a catch 22 really cause we need food everyday. But it's a torment for me personally.

    I'm the whole day not eaten a thing today bar a bowl of cereal. A consequence from yesterday.

    It is what it is I suppose.


    Hope you are all doing ok.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional West Moderators Posts: 60,158 Mod ✭✭✭✭Gremlinertia


    I get caught in a sorta bubble like that sometimes. It's the oddest feeling. Like being under ether, all conscious but with no input to goings on around me.. It's been going on for years so I try to breathe through it, I'm kinda ok with it at this point though..
    I know that some approaches advise using sensation to ground you. For instance grab an ice cube or a very warm mug.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,365 ✭✭✭Joya


    heyday30 wrote: »
    Sorry to hear joya x
    I think for a lot of people food issues Go hand in hand with depression / mood disorders.
    its a catch 22 really cause we need food everyday. But it's a torment for me personally.
    I'm the whole day not eaten a thing today bar a bowl of cereal. A consequence from yesterday.
    It is what it is I suppose.
    Hope you are all doing ok.

    so yes to me this sounds like bulimic behaviour similar to mine.. i never vomited food (yikes) but would oscillate between binge eating and dieting and between 41 and 47kg for the most of my life.. if those would be long term oscillations it would be no probs but it being few weeks or months its just a constant struggle..
    emotional eating is more common to women men are usually addicted to other stuff it being porn sex alcohol or whatever.. not saying there are no man who suffer from this
    read loads of books one was kindof special and was hoping it would do miracles for me (it unfortunately did not) Brain over Binge (Katherine Hansen) but it gave me some insights..
    anyway dealing with urges does take loads of effort and energy and the trouble is that yes food is essential for our survival so it can get you highly addicted
    i think being kind to yourself and accepting whatever you are can help elevate the pressure.. also my therapist told me and shocked me at first with it saying i am the same person with few kilos more or less and should be able to love myself just the same, and not to be overly attached to body image...and so also very negatively judgemental :o...
    this topic still has stigma of shame on it and people do not tend to talk easily if at all about it.. i experienced it is more "acceptable" to talk about depression anxiety and similar then about eating disorders...


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,877 ✭✭✭heyday30


    Joya wrote: »
    so yes to me this sounds like bulimic behaviour similar to mine.. i never vomited food (yikes) but would oscillate between binge eating and dieting and between 41 and 47kg for the most of my life.. if those would be long term oscillations it would be no probs but it being few weeks or months its just a constant struggle..
    emotional eating is more common to women men are usually addicted to other stuff it being porn sex alcohol or whatever.. not saying there are no man who suffer from this
    read loads of books one was kindof special and was hoping it would do miracles for me (it unfortunately did not) Brain over Binge (Katherine Hansen) but it gave me some insights..
    anyway dealing with urges does take loads of effort and energy and the trouble is that yes food is essential for our survival so it can get you highly addicted
    i think being kind to yourself and accepting whatever you are can help elevate the pressure.. also my therapist told me and shocked me at first with it saying i am the same person with few kilos more or less and should be able to love myself just the same, and not to be overly attached to body image...and so also very negatively judgemental :o...
    this topic still has stigma of shame on it and people do not tend to talk easily if at all about it.. i experienced it is more "acceptable" to talk about depression anxiety and similar then about eating disorders...

    Wow joya. Very interesting read there. Thanks. :)
    Body image is a curse. I try as you say to be more accepting of myself.
    We are our own worst enemies. Competing with others who are different from us anyway.
    It really doesn't make sense.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,365 ✭✭✭Joya


    heyday30 wrote: »
    Wow joya. Very interesting read there. Thanks. :)
    Body image is a curse. I try as you say to be more accepting of myself.
    We are our own worst enemies. Competing with others who are different from us anyway.
    It really doesn't make sense.

    ha, glad to hear there was something interesting for ya :pac:
    id agree about the body image, it is a curse, in my case other people rarely notice my ups and downs but i do notice and it really effect my mood it creating the negative cycle.. on the other hand it feels so good when i manage to get to the lower end, g, how i wish i can just stay there!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    Definitely good, slotted right back in. Couple of moments of "how do I...." but otherwise it's fine. Nothing changed. Even my postit note listing incomplete jobs when I was leaving was still on my desk

    Delighted to hear that, Scrim! :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭mg1982


    Advice needed re Disassociation? I have had not so major issues in past with this and feeling I am present physically but not mentally and fully. I just feel like I haven't been 100%there for past while. It getting frustrating and actually bringing me down.
    During the weekend, I had a weird experience with feeling like I was in a different reality but can't make sense of it. I was awake but it was very vivid and real yet feel like I had no control over the whole thing. This has actually freaked me out majorly.

    All advice/information appreciated?

    Its something i have been dealing with for a long time now. Feeling unreal, disconnected and having no recollection of having done something 5 mins before. It really is terrible to deal with. The only advice i can give is try and get a good nights sleep and cut back on the stimulants like caffeine and nicotteine.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 345 ✭✭freudiangirl


    I get caught in a sorta bubble like that sometimes. It's the oddest feeling. Like being under ether, all conscious but with no input to goings on around me.. It's been going on for years so I try to breathe through it, I'm kinda ok with it at this point though..
    I know that some approaches advise using sensation to ground you. For instance grab an ice cube or a very warm mug.

    I find it hard to come back to being. Feeling like I need to be doing something to get grounded even a tiny bit.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 345 ✭✭freudiangirl


    mg1982 wrote: »
    Its something i have been dealing with for a long time now. Feeling unreal, disconnected and having no recollection of having done something 5 mins before. It really is terrible to deal with. The only advice i can give is try and get a good nights sleep and cut back on the stimulants like caffeine and nicotteine.


    Well it's been there on/ off past few months and last few weeks have been awful.
    I honestly feel like a robot programmed to get through life.
    Sleep can go extreme ..never normal really.
    Just really fed up with not feeling.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭mg1982


    Well it's been there on/ off past few months and last few weeks have been awful.
    I honestly feel like a robot programmed to get through life.
    Sleep can go extreme ..never normal really.
    Just really fed up with not feeling.

    Hopefully its a temporary thing and it soon goes away. Its usually caused by extreme anxiety and stress and its just your minds way of dealing with it. But ya it makes you feel not human.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional West Moderators Posts: 60,158 Mod ✭✭✭✭Gremlinertia


    I've been worrying a bit lately, an old symptom has reappeared and it's freaking me out a bit. I keep seeing dead friends, anyone on the street who even just vaguely resembles one of them suddenly is their spitting image. It's massively disconcerting. It's also very discouraging to me.. Oh well, I'll try talk about it in therapy and see if I can do something.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    Well it's been there on/ off past few months and last few weeks have been awful.
    I honestly feel like a robot programmed to get through life.
    Sleep can go extreme ..never normal really.
    Just really fed up with not feeling.

    :(

    Hang on in there, FG. Things will hopefully click there soon.

    You're doing great by just communicating with all us here. Bundling it all up isn't good at all.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    I've been worrying a bit lately, an old symptom has reappeared and it's freaking me out a bit. I keep seeing dead friends, anyone on the street who even just vaguely resembles one of them suddenly is their spitting image. It's massively disconcerting. It's also very discouraging to me.. Oh well, I'll try talk about it in therapy and see if I can do something.

    That sounds so distressing. So sorry to hear that, Grem.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭mg1982


    I've been worrying a bit lately, an old symptom has reappeared and it's freaking me out a bit. I keep seeing dead friends, anyone on the street who even just vaguely resembles one of them suddenly is their spitting image. It's massively disconcerting. It's also very discouraging to me.. Oh well, I'll try talk about it in therapy and see if I can do something.

    That does sound a bit scary. Its funny how the mind can play tricks on you like that.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional West Moderators Posts: 60,158 Mod ✭✭✭✭Gremlinertia


    Thanks folks, tbh I didn't really understand that it was weird as I thought most people went through it.. I made logic of it by the fact I was getting older and seeing more and more people so the odds of resemblance were narrower.. Isn't it amazing how able we are to justify things to ourselves?


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,449 ✭✭✭Call Me Jimmy


    Sorry to jump in, anyone ever get the odd recognition that everything, all the pain and imagining and threads of thoughts that are roaring out of control are all contained just inside your skull, like in the physical space? if i look around the room, it is all going on between my eyes, between my ears, just under the skin and at that barrier it ends entirely. Here, everything, just outside, none of it exists. It almost feels as if my head is being physically bounced around by the whirling, but when I remember that just past the threshold of skin it all evaporates, it gives me a slight grounding.

    Anyone ever get simple insights like this, where if told to by someone else 'it's all in your head' it means nothing and has no effect, but then you get an insight for yourself and it helps you a bit


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional West Moderators Posts: 60,158 Mod ✭✭✭✭Gremlinertia


    Callmejimmy, ever seen a painting called 'the scream' by Edward Munch? Google it if not, I often think that's like a representation of inside my head on some days.. Shakespeare also had a good line for it in 'King Lear' calling it "the tempest in my mind" and do you know what I find most comforting about all that?. I like that two brilliant artists have such a good knowledge of the whirlpool that a mind can be..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,365 ✭✭✭Joya


    I've been worrying a bit lately, an old symptom has reappeared and it's freaking me out a bit. I keep seeing dead friends, anyone on the street who even just vaguely resembles one of them suddenly is their spitting image. It's massively disconcerting. It's also very discouraging to me.. Oh well, I'll try talk about it in therapy and see if I can do something.
    i know what you mean, i am "seeing" my friend who committed suicide 2 months ago around the city in people, then always have to say myself this is not possible, and also yes a thought comes i will never see him again......


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  • Registered Users Posts: 111 ✭✭themissymoo


    Joya wrote: »
    i know what you mean, i am "seeing" my friend who committed suicide 2 months ago around the city in people, then always have to say myself this is not possible, and also yes a thought comes i will never see him again......

    Happens to me too! A friend died in a tragic accident last year and I think I see him around every so often. It's scary and saddening. :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,365 ✭✭✭Joya


    Happens to me too! A friend died in a tragic accident last year and I think I see him around every so often. It's scary and saddening. :(

    yes, it is saddening moment when i realize this could not possibly be Martin as he's not with us anymore... and that ill never see him again.. breaks my heart every time..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭mg1982


    Feel really off today. Was out earlier on and thought everyone was looking at me and talking about me really paranoid. Felt like i was having one long panic attack all day. Im just glad to be home. Dont feel like leaving the house again for weeks after that.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 345 ✭✭freudiangirl


    Hey all.
    Still feeling so disassociated as if I am existing and kinda seeing through people.its getting worse.
    Heading for train back to Cork now after dbt course I had urges to jump off at stations I didn't know on way up and just disappear. Mood just keeps getting lower and lower. Kind a hoping pdoc adds a anti depressant tomorrow. I can feel myself slipping into the depths of nothingness again .
    I think if it wasn't for the disassociation I'd manage it.
    I dunno, everyone says how well I look? I am convinced it's because I dyed my hair. I just feel even more of a shell of my former self.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,344 ✭✭✭Diamond Doll


    I've somewhat known that feeling FG, when I've been in the depths of despair and trying to put on a positive outward facade ... But, it was actually so depressing when people actually fell for it and told me that I was looking great. And I was nearly tempted to ask them, were they taking the píss, how could they not see how bad I felt underneath that face I was putting on? I would have felt better if they'd taken one look at me and known straight away how bad I was. But no one ever did. :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 345 ✭✭freudiangirl


    I've somewhat known that feeling FG, when I've been in the depths of despair and trying to put on a positive outward facade ... But, it was actually so depressing when people actually fell for it and told me that I was looking great. And I was nearly tempted to ask them, were they taking the píss, how could they not see how bad I felt underneath that face I was putting on? I would have felt better if they'd taken one look at me and known straight away how bad I was. But no one ever did. :(



    I'm on train now back home after dbt.and just want to hop off and disappear forever. Don't even know who to tell how I am feeling as my crisis numbers after 5 are for cork a&e.
    I just feel as if nothing will get better.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 59 ✭✭timecurve12


    I found this article about chronic worrying helpful, so thought I'd share. I'm actually terrible for torturing myself with constant worrying, it's killing me.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    I found this article about chronic worrying helpful, so thought I'd share. I'm actually terrible for torturing myself with constant worrying, it's killing me.

    Thanks for the share, TC. It's something I live with here, too.


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,179 ✭✭✭✭fr336


    Thanks for the share, TC. It's something I live with here, too.

    I do love seeing your name on my screen, Hugo :)


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    fr336 wrote: »
    I do love seeing your name on my screen, Hugo :)

    fc,550x550,white.jpg


This discussion has been closed.
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