Relationship Deal Breakers

kylith

dark crystal wrote: »

Neck jewellery - Men wearing chains or necklaces. I just think it looks awful! Can't explain my disdain for it, I just avoid men with neck jewellery like the plague!

I think it depends on the guy. A young man with a good body, possibly on a surfboard, can carry a simple necklace. However Richard Hammond, for example, cute as he is, really needs to take his one off now.

kunst nugget

kylith wrote: »

I think it depends on the guy. A young man with a good body, possibly on a surfboard, can carry a simple necklace. However Richard Hammond, for example, cute as he is, really needs to take his one off now.

It's the guys that wear the silver necklaces over black jumpers or black tshirts. The ultimate in skobieness…

kylith

kunst nugget wrote: »

It's the guys that wear the silver necklaces over black jumpers or black tshirts. The ultimate in skobieness…

Or the gold medallions *shudder*

jaffacakesyum

Makenzie Fierce Coriander wrote: »

Depends on the item. Socks every day, boxers everyday or every second day, t-shirts and shirts every second day, jeans last a week at least and often longer.

Boxers every second day? :eek:

Deal breaker: Knob cheese

josip

I get the impression there are a lot more females than males posting on this thread?
Have I the wrong impression? I thought for a while I had strayed into the Ladies Lounge.

Are guys not bothered to post or do they not have any deal deal breakers?

princess-lala

josip wrote: »

Are guys not bothered to post or do they not have any deal deal breakers?

Not getting the ride I suppose would be a deal breaker for them

--Kaiser--

josip wrote: »

I get the impression there are a lot more females than males posting on this thread?
Have I the wrong impression? I thought for a while I had strayed into the Ladies Lounge.

Are guys not bothered to post or do they not have any deal deal breakers?

Not being an ill-tempered, irrational, self obsessed lunatic but would be top of my list

josip

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

Not being an ill-tempered, irrational, self obsessed lunatic but would be top of my list

Would you like to reconsider?
You're ruling out a large part of the market with your 2nd breaker.

IvaBigWun

josip wrote: »

Are guys not bothered to post or do they not have any deal deal breakers?

Girls who dont take their bits on regular trips to Brazil or Hollywood.

princess-lala

IvaBigWun wrote: »

Girls who dont take their bits on regular trips to Brazil or Hollywood.

Lets see how painful you find it and then see how often you'd go

moochers

Just because someone goes to Mass regularly, doesn't mean they are some kind of Jesus freak. My mother goes to Mass every day and she is very liberal and tolerant. Dad, on the other hand is an atheist, he sits in a cafe, drinking coffee and reading books why she is off praying. Mum, couldn't care less, she respects his beliefs, he respects hers. They are very happy together.

kunst nugget

IvaBigWun wrote: »

Girls who dont take their bits on regular trips to Brazil or Hollywood.

As a bloke, I don't understand this one at all, tbh. If a woman chooses to do it herself, fair enough but if she didn't, it wouldn't bother me. It's only a bit of fecking hair. Tbf, I'd rather hair down there then her to be as bald a child - that I would find a total turn off.

Malari

moochers wrote: »

Just because someone goes to Mass regularly, doesn't mean they are some kind of Jesus freak. My mother goes to Mass every day and she is very liberal and tolerant. Dad, on the other hand is an atheist, he sits in a cafe, drinking coffee and reading books why she is off praying. Mum, couldn't care less, she respects his beliefs, he respects hers. They are very happy together.

Well that's fine, I respect the right of anyone to believe whatever the hell they want to. Doesn't mean I'm going to get into a relationship with them though.

jaffacakesyum

moochers wrote: »

Just because someone goes to Mass regularly, doesn't mean they are some kind of Jesus freak. My mother goes to Mass every day and she is very liberal and tolerant. Dad, on the other hand is an atheist, he sits in a cafe, drinking coffee and reading books why she is off praying. Mum, couldn't care less, she respects his beliefs, he respects hers. They are very happy together.

I don't understand this. I'm glad your parents are happy together and I have religious friends and we all respect each others beliefs and that's fine. People can choose to believe what they like. But I would never get in a relationship with a religious person. I don't see how it's compatible at all?

Like for example surely your mother believes, if she follows Christianity, that as a non-believer your father is going to hell? Would that not be insanely hard...that's why I wouldn't be in a relationship with somebody religious - views are way too incompatible.

IvaBigWun

princess-lala wrote: »

Lets see how painful you find it and then see how often you'd go

We dont need to wax down there. Gillette Mach 5 is our friend

jaffacakesyum

IvaBigWun wrote: »

Girls who dont take their bits on regular trips to Brazil or Hollywood.

I assume you wax down there yourself?

princess-lala

So why should a woman wax? It can be taken care of at home too yano!

jaffacakesyum

IvaBigWun wrote: »

We dont need to wax down there. Gillette Mach 5 is our friend

As I thought. It's ok if you can't take the pain of waxing. You have to be tough as a vagina to take it

kunst nugget

IvaBigWun wrote: »

We dont need to wax down there. Gillette Mach 5 is our friend

You shave your bollix? Jesus, the man sac is ugly enough without showing it free of foliage.

josip

jaffacakesyum wrote: »

Like for example surely your mother believes, if she follows Christianity, that as a non-believer your father is going to hell? Would that not be insanely hard...that's why I wouldn't be in a relationship with somebody religious - views are way too incompatible.

Perhaps we'll all end up in hell regardless of our religious beliefs?

moochers

I don't understand this. I'm glad your parents are happy together and I have religious friends and we all respect each others beliefs and that's fine. People can choose to believe what they like. But I would never get in a relationship with a religious person. I don't see how it's compatible at all?

Like for example surely your mother believes, if she follows Christianity, that as a non-believer your father is going to hell? Would that not be insanely hard...that's why I wouldn't be in a relationship with somebody religious - views are way too incompatible.

I get where you are coming from, and tbh that doesn't seem to be an issue for them. Then again, maybe the reason my mum goes to Mass so much is that's she hoping she will get a plus 1. Don't know but I'll ask and get back to ya.

Pug160

Wibbs wrote: »

Most do, even if they don't admit/realise it. Study after study has borne this out. One example took pictures of couples and handed out the women pics to male participants and men pics to female and got them to rate them on looks. In the vast majority of couples they matched up. So a "6" was with another "6" and a "3" with a "3". Mismatches were outliers and in those cases usually the man was the lower rating, but turned out to be higher on the social scale than average. Yes pheromones are extremely important, as is personality, but they come after the visual "oh I would" 9 times outa 10.

I have defo had the 1 times outa 10 though Shopaholic. Years ago I met this woman who really rang my bell physically and personality wise and I did the same for her and people would comment that we looked soooo like a couple. Fine, but for some reason we couldn't fathom at the time getting romantic felt very wrong for want of a better word. We ended up as good mates, but sexual attraction just wasn't there, we were more like brother and sister. It was very odd, but I'd put money the smell/pheromone thing was at play there.

I'd agree with some of that. I think a lot of couples probably are similar in terms of looks. There are exceptions certainly, but I'd estimate the exceptions are in the range of about 1 in every 10 or so. I'd put smell/pheromones in 3rd place at best in terms of importance. Pheromones are very important in the animal kingdom but the role they play with humans is still not completely clear. I'll have to do more research but from the little I have read pheromones are not usually detectable from human to human as we don't have the capacity to detect them. And even if we did, which is a big if, most of us wash too often and use too many products for them to be detected.

Pheromone talk just reminds me of nerdy guys or girls who are desperately looking for a simple solution in how to attract women or men. It's a grey area at best and is way down there in importance, and that's if it's even important at all.

Pug160

dark crystal wrote: »

My deal beakers would be:



Neck jewellery - Men wearing chains or necklaces. I just think it looks awful! Can't explain my disdain for it, I just avoid men with neck jewellery like the plague!

Are you talking about all neck jewellery? Because it's not all silver and gold chains like some people might imagine. Most of those look tacky but there are some unique, less mainstream ones that look a lot more tasteful. I was never much of a fan myself but quite recently I saw some really nice hand made ones, including one with volcanic rock on it and I bought it. It's not an everyday necklace but it looks pretty cool if I'm going out. I guess it depends who's wearing it though.

shopaholic01

Wibbs wrote: »

Most do, even if they don't admit/realise it. Study after study has borne this out. One example took pictures of couples and handed out the women pics to male participants and men pics to female and got them to rate them on looks. In the vast majority of couples they matched up. So a "6" was with another "6" and a "3" with a "3". Mismatches were outliers and in those cases usually the man was the lower rating, but turned out to be higher on the social scale than average. Yes pheromones are extremely important, as is personality, but they come after the visual "oh I would" 9 times outa 10.

I have defo had the 1 times outa 10 though Shopaholic. Years ago I met this woman who really rang my bell physically and personality wise and I did the same for her and people would comment that we looked soooo like a couple. Fine, but for some reason we couldn't fathom at the time getting romantic felt very wrong for want of a better word. We ended up as good mates, but sexual attraction just wasn't there, we were more like brother and sister. It was very odd, but I'd put money the smell/pheromone thing was at play there.

I watched a documentary where a group of participants were rated from 1 to 10 on their looks. They didn't know what their own score was, but everyone had it stuck to their forehead. They entered a room together and everyone was asked to move towards the person they considered to equal looks wise. Only one or two got it wrong by a small margin e.g. a 4 going to a 5. A lot of people won't approach those they deem 'out of their league'

When you mention the importance of looks I assume you mean initially, you're not going to spend years with a looker who has an imcompatible personality. I'm not saying that looks don't play a part, but they're only a small part of attraction. I can honestly say that a sense of humour and social skills are more important than looks. They'll more likely to remain intact as time progresses too.

With the pheromone thing, a group of girls were asked to smell shirts worn by men after sport. The girls rated the smell and picked a favourite, one might find X shirt revolting, another would find it irresistable. There was a direct link to immunity of the individuals.

shopaholic01

Pug160 wrote: »

I'd agree with some of that. I think a lot of couples probably are similar in terms of looks. There are exceptions certainly, but I'd estimate the exceptions are in the range of about 1 in every 10 or so. I'd put smell/pheromones in 3rd place at best in terms of importance. Pheromones are very important in the animal kingdom but the role they play with humans is still not completely clear. I'll have to do more research but from the little I have read pheromones are not usually detectable from human to human as we don't have the capacity to detect them. And even if we did, which is a big if, most of us wash too often and use too many products for them to be detected.

Pheromone talk just reminds me of nerdy guys or girls who are desperately looking for a simple solution in how to attract women or men. It's a grey area at best and is way down there in importance, and that's if it's even important at all.

A lot of it is subconscious. Have you ever just met someone and instantly thought 'I would', even though you know that you wouldn't give them a second glance if you spotted them across the room?

Pug160

shopaholic01 wrote: »

I watched a documentary where a group of participants were rated from 1 to 10 on their looks. They didn't know what their own score was, but everyone had it stuck to their forehead. They entered a room together and everyone was asked to move towards the person they considered to equal looks wise. Only one or two got it wrong by a small margin e.g. a 4 going to a 5. A lot of people won't approach those they deem 'out of their league'

When you mention the importance of looks I assume you mean initially, you're not going to spend years with a looker who has an imcompatible personality. I'm not saying that looks don't play a part, but they're only a small part of attraction. I can honestly say that a sense of humour and social skills are more important than looks. They'll more likely to remain intact as time progresses too.

With the pheromone thing, a group of girls were asked to smell shirts worn by men after sport. The girls rated the smell and picked a favourite, one might find X shirt revolting, another would find it irresistable. There was a direct link to immunity of the individuals.

Most of those tests are too small to be taken seriously. Besides, it could have been certain products the people were using that contaminated the clothes. Anyway, as far as I know, pheromones cannot be detected by humans. It's a very grey area. Even if smells themselves (not related to pheromones) are important, they're not going to make a man you're not physically attracted to or in any other way attracted to attractive.

Pug160

shopaholic01 wrote: »

A lot of it is subconscious. Have you ever just met someone and instantly thought 'I would', even though you know that you wouldn't give them a second glance if you spotted them across the room?

Probably. But I don't think it's pheromones or smells. It's probably just something quirky about them.

shopaholic01

Pug160 wrote: »

Most of those tests are too small to be taken seriously. Besides, it could have been certain products the people were using that contaminated the clothes. Anyway, as far as I know, pheromones cannot be detected by humans. It's a very grey area. Even if smells themselves (not related to pheromones) are important, they're not going to make a man you're not physically attracted to or in any other way attracted to attractive.

I'm starting to think I'm a freak!

Have you never had a relationship with someone that you didn't find attractive initially? Someone that maybe 'grew' on you as you got to know them, or that you found attractive later?

Norwesterner

Don't know if it's middle-age setting in, but I'm finding laddettes really off-putting.
Those who wear football tops, drink pints, have tattoes, and a potty mouth.
I'd probably divorce if she went out in pyjamas as well.

Pug160

shopaholic01 wrote: »

I'm starting to think I'm a freak!

Have you never had a relationship with someone that you didn't find attractive initially? Someone that maybe 'grew' on you as you got to know them, or that you found attractive later?

A pleasant personality can be infectious, possibly more so for women. I highly doubt it's pheromones or smells at play. Maybe you just can't quite understand why you like certain people and this pheromone theory looks like a possibility. But if you've nothing in common with someone and don't fancy them nothing else is going to make a difference, so I really don't buy the theory at all. There's no real evidence to support it either.