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Buffalo & Doozerie - The mild musings of two grumpy old men!
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Bless me King Kelly for I have sinned.
This morning I was at a crossroads, waiting to turn right. The car behind me slowly inched forward until the front wheel was alongside me (to my left). The driver was not indicating, but I had a sneaking suspicion that when the light changed they were going to cut across me.
I could see the green for the opposing traffic turn red, so I went for it to make sure I'd get ahead. Unfortunately, the next green in the sequence was for the minor side road, and I just went through a red light instead.
Apologies all. It's my fault people can have a go at cyclists today, sure I gave us all a bad name.
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Mood set to "vent", posting tone set to "moan", indicator on and move out smoothly...
While cycling to work recently I went round the outside of a left-turning car as I passed through a crossroads. My focus was the turning car, the traffic behind me, and making sure I threw myself under neither. As I cleared the car, a bicycle wheel intruded on my consciousness. It was a bicycle courier that was rolling into the junction from my left, through their red light.
I swung my bike right, while trying to stay within my lane, but as my left foot clipped their front wheel I was sure we'd both end up on on the ground since my left-mounted rear pannier bag seemed certain to collide more solidly with them. I briefly wondered whether the moving traffic behind would stop in time if I found myself on the deck. Thankfully it didn't happen, I stayed upright somehow and the courier did too. I glanced back to see them sheepishly raising a hand in acknowledgement.
I've had plenty of conversations with cyclists that have assured me that running a red light is fine because they always "make sure it's safe" first. I see people break red lights every single day, on bikes and in cars. Many many people are clearly convinced that it's a safe practice. I suspect that courier would have argued the same, though maybe with a little less enthusiasm that morning...
But the following week was a new week, it was going to be a better week, I could feel it in my waters.
So I was feeling optimistic on the Monday morning. But optimism doesn't trump basic common sense, so as I approached a car stopped on red in a left turning+bus lane with their left indicator on, I stopped behind them. I could have gone round on their outside, just to sit a metre or two ahead and now in their path, but why would I do that? Or I could have gone up their inside to get to the same spot, but why? I occasionally see those signs on the back of large vehicles that say cyclists shouldn't pass on the inside when the vehicles are turning left, and I wonder why they think it necessary to print something that seems so blatantly obvious.
It's clearly a measure of how hopelessly naive I am that as I saw a cyclist pass fast on my inside, to go up the inside of the indicating car, I thought to myself that he'd be on the brakes any moment now. But no. As he reached the car, the traffic light changed to green and the car started to move. I expected a squeal of bicycle brakes, a sheepish looking cyclist. But no. The cyclist motored on undeterred, up the inside of the car like a rat up a drainpipe, he cleared the front left of the car as the car was well into the junction and now stopped. I assume the motorist had seen him and held back, because the timing was about perfect for the cyclist to have ended up either embedded in that front wing, or under it, if the motorist hadn't been on the ball.
I wondered whether the cyclist had been given a fright, or whether he was completely oblivious to what had almost been his fate. I got my answer at the next red light, which he merrily rode through. Which he did "safely" of course, just like he had "safely" negotiated the previous junction. And in the process he had shaved at least a handful of seconds off his commute. Probably. Maybe. I guess in the weighing up of the value of his life against the saving of a few seconds, the latter wins in his mind.
Same day, new journey, hopeless optimism renewed so this was a fresh start. My commute home brings me through Rathmines. I have a lasting memory of Rathmines from when I first arrived in Dublin and was looking for somewhere to live. There were quite a few "apartments" available there at the time and while they were a ludicrous price, that was in the context of Dublin prices so they almost looked like a bargain. All of the ones that I looked at though involved sharing. Mostly sharing with hygiene-challenged multi-legged creatures that like to scurry along the floors when you are walking around in bare feet. It was clearly family-friendly accommodation though, given the numbers of rodent families that clearly lived there. On the surface the area has improved a lot over the years, the buildings look better maintained (mostly). Not so true of those passing through though, road-ents seem to have taken over.
I came over the canal bridge, with the inevitable cyclists breaking their red light to my left and getting the hump when I wouldn't stop to let them pull out in front of me (I'm a horrible person). A Dublin bus driver had decided that driving in the cycle lane was the right and proper thing to do so he was clung to the kerb while stopped in the long line of traffic ahead. I reckon I knew why the bus driver took this position, I regularly see cyclists shoot up the inside of buses that are trying to pull into the bus stop 50m ahead, some even while the bus is actually driving towards the kerb, I'd hate to be in the shoes of the bus driver in that situation. That didn't excuse the rubbish driving on the part of this bus driver though.
Anyway, I stopped behind it. Cyclists swarmed past on my right without a moment's hesitation. Surprisingly no cyclists passed on my left though, it wouldn't be the first time I'v seen someone act as if they could shove a "mere bus" out of their way, maybe none of the cyclists on this day had had their porridge that morning. The overtakers seemed unconcerned even as the bus started to roll slowly forward and the car behind it rolled forward into the gap that the cyclists were aiming for. But no-one died, so I imagine none of the overtakers took anything from it other than a reinforced sense of immortality.
The bus reached the bus stop, let people on and off, and indicated to pull out into traffic again. It hadn't taken long but I was keen to get moving again once it was out of my way. As the bus started to pull out though, several more cyclists went past me and round the outside of the bus. Two of the cyclists couldn't get past, presumably due to the traffic ahead, so they were stranded between the side of the bus and the centre line of the road, clearly unwilling to drop back and pull in behind. So they kept cycling slowly, and the bus kept driving slowly beside them and still practically clung to the kerb. Despite the stakes being so high, this battle of wills between the cyclists and the bus driver was utterly boring.
At last the cycle lane opened up in front of me as the bus pulled out into the solid tailback of cars. But 20 metres ahead a car that had pulled out from a road to the right was angled so badly that its front was completely blocking the cycle lane. The car driver was wrestling with his steering wheel and gears as he tried to reposition his car in the limited space available between him and the cars in front and behind him. I shed an internal tear as I stopped my bike again. Then things got really surreal.
It was like I'd stepped into an old-school martial arts flick, one of those scenes where the hero (that's me, it's my martial arts flick, so I get to be the hero!) starts spitting fireballs from his hands at the thing in his path. In this low budget flick though, actual fireballs were too expensive so we had to make do with cyclists instead. At least, that must be how it looked to the shocked car driver ahead, as from his perspective all he could see was me but suddenly this swarm of cyclists sprouted from left and right as they rode round me from behind. The budget was so low that the cyclists were sh1te. Two of them swerved left at the sight of the car ahead, mounted the footpath and wobbled precariously as they tried to weave between and around the pedestrians. Two more swerved right, choosing to ride into the oncoming lane and its line of moving cars in order to get round the angled car which by now was trying to reverse.
Most heroes save their best 'til last, but not me apparently. The car ahead had reversed a little just as another cyclist cut up my inside. She (because I'm an equal opportunities hero and I'll defend my right to employ female idiot fireballs/cyclists alongside male idiot fireballs/cyclists) must surely have seen that the angled car was now driving forward again, further into the cycle lane as the driver tried to swing the front of the car out of the cycle lane, but she dived for the shrinking gap between car and kerb anyway. She jammed on her brakes at about the same time as the driver, closest thing to a collision since the guy from the previous week undertaking the left-turning car. And just like that incident, it was entirely avoidable and utterly stupid.
"Are you TRYING to get yourself run over?", I asked as I passed her by moments later, but she didn't reply. I forgot to tell her she ruined my movie, and my career as a hero, who wants a hero with incompetent "weapons"? 0 -
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzE-IMaegzQ
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