50 shades of grey-Why so popular?

Monty Burnz

IzzyWizzy wrote: »

I agree. It's horrendous. The writing is a joke and Ana is a totally one-dimensional and unlikeable protagonist. If you want to read a bit of erotic literature, there are thousands of websites doing it better.

Much like what I've heard 'Bella' is like in the Twilight novels - basically just a placeholder for the girl/woman reading the book so they can (at some level) pretend it's about them.

Lemming

iguana wrote: »

What does this mean? Isn't he just someone who enjoys BDSM, like many, many millions of people do. Afaik BDSM is pretty much the most common kink in the world and I doubt that the majority of people who are into it have turned out that way for any reason more compelling than why some people prefer cats to dogs.

Is practising BDSM some sort of terrible side-effect of past trauma in the FSoG universe? Because if it is then it's pretty insulting to anyone who's into it, which includes pretty much every single person who reads the book.

MrTsSnickers wrote: »

That's the way he's portrayed in the books, that he's had such a traumatic past, the only viable option was BDSM. No, he had a sh**ty past and abusive relationships seem to be a symptom of that. If it were a book (or 3) about a troubled guy who got into relationships, in which he was abusive and looked for someone that could be easily manipulated, that would've been more accurate, but likely less "sexy".

LittleBook wrote: »

I've said it before and I'll say it again ... E. L. James has no understanding whatsoever of BDSM relationships, likewise neither do her readers ... even less so now having read the bloody book.

Disclaimer: I have not read any of the books, nor will I ever grace the author with a penny. Everything is from what I have read about it, and from exceprts I have seen printed, or from discussion about the series from within the BDSM community.

As LittleBook has said; the author hasn't a f*cking foggies notion of BDSM, nor do a sizeable portion of its reader base judging by the two quoted comments above.

What truly angers me is tthe damage that E.L.James has done to the perception of the BDSM community in the eyes of the larger population, through cynical lazy hack writing chasing quick cash.

panda100

iguana wrote: »

Is practising BDSM some sort of terrible side-effect of past trauma in the FSoG universe? Because if it is then it's pretty insulting to anyone who's into it, which includes pretty much every single person who reads the book.

One of the main themes of the books is Christians Grey's abusive past, and how this has lead him to this BDSM lifetsyle.

joysabroad

I think the books make women feel the way they think they want to feel.

I have to admit that I read all 3 books. Not because I liked them but they were quick easy reads and I guess that's what I needed. I put them down a few times and hoped not to pick them up but still I finished all of them.

I hate the female character. She is weak and insecure! I think the first book is pretty engaging. It's a dream to get the seemingly unattainable guy right? But I hated being in the head of the female character. I hated her inner monologue.

snafuk35

joysabroad wrote: »

I think the books make women feel the way they think they want to feel.

I have to admit that I read all 3 books. Not because I liked them but they were quick easy reads and I guess that's what I needed. I put them down a few times and hoped not to pick them up but still I finished all of them.

I hate the female character. She is weak and insecure! I think the first book is pretty engaging. It's a dream to get the seemingly unattainable guy right? But I hated being in the head of the female character. I hated her inner monologue.

You're just jealous of her!:D You wish it was you.

mike65

Has anyone bought Fifty Shades - The Classical Album and a bottle of wine? *Ahem*

IvyTheTerrible

snafuk35 wrote: »

You're just jealous of her!:D You wish it was you.

Yeah I bet every woman wishes they were in an abusive controlling relationship. :rolleyes:

Millicent

snafuk35 wrote: »

You're just jealous of her!:D You wish it was you.

Why would anyone be jealous of a woman who's in a relationship that makes her cry regularly, who apparently can't afford clothes because she's always bothering them and whose fella thinks it's sultry to stalk her and

whip a tampon out of her before sex

?*




*That last one is spoilered because a) it's disgusting and b)... There is no b. It's just that disgusting.

The Corinthian

I've not read it. I have read a number of excerpts from it, not to mention reviews, and found it to be poorly written. Even the sex scenes are badly narrated, repetitive and not terribly imaginative. It's like Jilly Cooper writing about S&M.

One thing that struck me was that the sexual theme seems to be about a woman who begins as sexually puritanical and inexperienced (and never really changes, TBH). It seems to be about her indulging in sexual practices that she secretly desires to try, yet cannot admit it. Grey 'makes' her do these things, taking any responsibility away from her for the acts themselves - at the same time she is also punished by Grey, because she needs punishment for secretly enjoying them. On top of which, the 'love' or 'relationship' between them seems to be some sort of justification for the whole thing.

I can't really see any woman, who is sexually experienced or simply comfortable with sex, really liking this book all that much. It strikes me as the sort of book that would be read by someone who has limited sexual experience, is generally passive and who would never even dream of fulfilling any sexual fantasy unless they were able to transfer responsibility of doing so to someone else.

I don't mean that such a person is a virgin - indeed, she's probably in a long-term relationship or married - however, if so, her sexual routine is probably alternating between three basic positions and she'll never initiate anything new. Possibly never even initiate sex either.

As such, I actually find its popularity terribly depressing. Unless, I'm way off the mark. Please tell me I am.

Lemming

The Corinthian wrote: »

As such, I actually find its popularity terribly depressing. Unless, I'm way off the mark. Please tell me I am.

No, you're not. That this series of shoddy literature twilight fan-fiction has gained such mass appeal is depressing. It is depressing for feeding so many naieve people with a notion that BDSM is all about abuse. By inference it implies that anyone with an interest in BDSM is either damaged goods or an abusive person. It [BDSM] is not; not by a country mile so wide you could fit a galaxy through it.

That someone is "made" to do things against their will breaks the most basic and fundamental tenants of the BDSM community; namely S.S.C. (Safe, Sane, Consensual). And when you hear anecdotes of folks seeing groups of young teenage girls reading the books together, you fear for the next generation if they - in their formative years of sexual awareness/growth - equate "happiness" with a blackberry & an laptop as a gift in exchange for putting up with paranoid-control-freak-with-low-self-esteem-domineering behaviour from despicable abusive f*cks. Or that conversely it's perfectly normal to be that despicable abusive f*ck.

Sorry, bit of an angry rant there folks. Excuse me.

iguana

Lemming wrote: »

By inference it implies that anyone with an interest in BDSM is either damaged goods or an abusive person.

The thing that really gets to me about this though is that surely lots of people read this book in the first place because they found the idea of spanking somewhat titillating. They were probably not that open, even to themselves, about the fact that it was something that turned them on and this book hitting the mainstream seemed like a good way to explore those feelings. Then the book ends with the message that being into spanking (or more) means you have some mental health issues that you need to sort out rather than you have a rather common 'kink' that it's perfectly healthy to want to read about or even act out with a willing partner. Which is surely the exact opposite of what erotic literature really should do.

Emeraldy Pebbles

iguana wrote: »

They were probably not that open, even to themselves, about the fact that it was something that turned them on and this book hitting the mainstream seemed like a good way to explore those feelings.

Maybe...

I have to say though, my kinks have been very apparent to me from a young age, very instinctive. I guess I thought everyone was the same? I've read erotica but never mainstream fluff, I beelined straight for the hard stuff. No alcopop erotica for me. More like whisky, straight up. :pac:

It's funny how this is ok when it's 50 shades of grey.

panda100

Deleted User wrote: »

It's funny how this is ok when it's 50 shades of grey.

Having read the first book , I really wouldn't class fifty shades as porn.

apache

Much against my better judgement i downloaded this book to my kindle in a moment of madness.
I read 5 chapters and deleted it. You would want to be a very bored housewife to enjoy it. Its appalling!

iguana

Emeraldy Pebbles wrote: »

Maybe...

I have to say though, my kinks have been very apparent to me from a young age, very instinctive. I guess I thought everyone was the same? I've read erotica but never mainstream fluff, I beelined straight for the hard stuff. No alcopop erotica for me. More like whisky, straight up. :pac:

That's kind of my point. I can't imagine that many people who were comfortably aware of having BDSM feelings would have flocked to this book as they'd already have explored those feeling and have their outlets for them, whether it's erotica that they enjoy, porn sites or sexual partners with compatible tastes. The type of women who read FSoG knowing that it contains spanking scenes would be, I suspect, women who haven't previously been that comfortable with what turns them on.

2rkehij30qtza5

Can't fathom this either. Should be renamed to '50 shades of sh1te"

Lemming

Eason Deafening Surf wrote: »

Can't fathom this either. Should be renamed to '50 shades of sh1te"

50 shades of tedious fvckery has already been coined, and rather successfully it would seem.

The Corinthian

iguana wrote: »

That's kind of my point. I can't imagine that many people who were comfortably aware of having BDSM feelings would have flocked to this book as they'd already have explored those feeling and have their outlets for them, whether it's erotica that they enjoy, porn sites or sexual partners with compatible tastes.

As a related observation, I've noticed that this book has not, at least not yet, been a major hit in Germany.

Lemming

The Corinthian wrote: »

As a related observation, I've noticed that this book has not, at least not yet, been a major hit in Germany.

I would also query its success in the Netherlands & Sweden; as both liberal, progressive, countries with reasonably large BDSM communities. The UK has a large BDSM community, yet 50 shades of grey has been successful here. Which makes me wonder if the lack of success is less to do with attitudes and more to do with such appallingly written literature not translating particularly well from the English language.

The Corinthian

Lemming wrote: »

I would also query its success in the Netherlands & Sweden; as both liberal, progressive, countries with reasonably large BDSM communities. The UK has a large BDSM community, yet 50 shades of grey has been successful here. Which makes me wonder if the lack of success is less to do with attitudes and more to do with such appallingly written literature not translating particularly well from the English language.

I don't know. Were I to expand from my earlier thesis, I might suggest that attitudes towards nudity and sex in general are typically far more liberal in western continental Europe than in Anglophone countries, that conversely tend to be more puritanical where it comes to anything to do with sex.

As such, if 50 Shades of Grey really does attract people who are titillated by things that they would normally be terrified to even admit titillates them, then it will have more success in more puritanical cultures.

Of course, it just might be a case that it's only entered the non-English speaking markets much later and has yet to hit critical mass, in terms of popularity.

iguana

Tbh, I get the same impression as The Corinthian about who is reading this book. I could be completely wrong about them but the only real life people I know who have read this book are not people who I associate with having wild kinky sex lives. Some of my mother's friends for example, the type of people who would dissolve into squirmy embarrassed giggles at the sight of a penis straw at a hen night. Whereas the people I know who are comfortable about their sex lives, BDSM desires or not, wouldn't read this as they would already be familiar with whether or not they enjoy erotica, and if they do enjoy it, they already have favourite sources of it.

FSoG, just really seems like a book aimed at those who are 'dipping their toe' into a scene. Which really does make it, imo, reprehensible that the end message is, if you enjoy this kink you are damaged.

IzzyWizzy

Just finished it - was stuck in a hotel for the weekend with not much else to do.

I did find it fairly gripping but it is SO badly written - cliched and repetitive and the sex scenes are pretty lame. You'd have to be pretty vanilla to find anything in this book shocking or a revelation. Or perhaps I'm kinkier than I thought. :eek:

syjg18

I haven't read it yet. It seems interesting so I better read it too.

panda100

syjg18 wrote: »

I haven't read it yet. It seems interesting so I better read it too.

'Interesting' would be the last adjective I would use to describe it. For me it was boring beacuse it was just so repetative.Most people I know have abandonded it half way through.

Das Kitty

iguana wrote: »

Tbh, I get the same impression as The Corinthian about who is reading this book. I could be completely wrong about them but the only real life people I know who have read this book are not people who I associate with having wild kinky sex lives. Some of my mother's friends for example, the type of people who would dissolve into squirmy embarrassed giggles at the sight of a penis straw at a hen night. Whereas the people I know who are comfortable about their sex lives, BDSM desires or not, wouldn't read this as they would already be familiar with whether or not they enjoy erotica, and if they do enjoy it, they already have favourite sources of it.

I know three real life people who've read it. One was a girl I mentioned before who's never 'looked at' her husband's penis. Another is an older woman who's decided to be celibate, she thought she was scandalising me by telling me she was reading it. LOL. The third was a girl I thought was pretty likely to kink it up, and I was surprised that she was reading that dirge. Then I found out that she was not in fact in anyway kinky and it all made sense.

LeeHoffmann

a girl I mentioned before who's never 'looked at' her husband's penis.

:eek: