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Would you date/marry a religious person?

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    #92
    IT-Guy
    Registered Users Posts: 514 ✭✭✭IT-Guy


    philologos wrote: »
    So you believe that a non-romantic friendship is the same as a romantic non-sexual relationship?

    Surely whether or not you genuinely love someone is what is most important?

    Sex is part of a loving relationship and a lack of it can be a grounds for divorce as far as I'm aware? You can genuinely love someone without having sex but I can't imagine that type of relationship lasting without it being addressed, it's a symptom of an underlying issue imo.


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    #93
    philologos
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,479 ✭✭✭✭philologos


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    philologos wrote: »
    So you believe that a non-romantic friendship is the same as a romantic non-sexual relationship?

    Nope
    philologos wrote: »
    Surely whether or not you genuinely love someone is what is most important?

    As Tina Turner once said, what's love got to do with it?

    Then how can your previous comment hold up if they are different.

    And of course love has a heck of a lot to do with it. If it wasn't about that I doubt the majority would seek to be in a committed monogamous relationship.


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    #94
    philologos
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,479 ✭✭✭✭philologos


    IT-Guy wrote: »
    Sex is part of a loving relationship and a lack of it can be a grounds for divorce as far as I'm aware? You can genuinely love someone without having sex but I can't imagine that type of relationship lasting without it being addressed, it's a symptom of an underlying issue imo.

    I'm talking about the pre-marriage stage in a Christian relationship. I don't know any Christian who would say that sex doesn't have a place in a marriage.


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    #95
    Doctor DooM
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 25,868 Mod ✭✭✭✭Doctor DooM


    philologos wrote: »
    I'm talking about the pre-marriage stage in a Christian relationship. I don't know any Christian who would say that sex doesn't have a place in a marriage.

    This thread isn't about that though. Seeing as an atheist has no reason not to enjoy sex before marriage, it'd be just as much an issue as a christian not letting the magic bus go to Manchester after marriage.

    If sex isn't important to you as part of a relationship before marriage, how come it magically does after?

    There's your answer.


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    #96
    philologos
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,479 ✭✭✭✭philologos


    Read the other posts. MagicMarker claimed a romantic non-sexual relationship is pretty much a friendship.

    I'll come to your other points later.


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    #97
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    I think if a person is Religious and follow the moral code of that Religion etc

    They will more than likely be more faithful,loving,supportive etc

    And a non believer could be just as faithful,loving,supportive etc

    As long as both people in that relationship have boundaries put into place and decide not to let their beliefs or non beliefs interfere with their relationship,or with their kids decisions on their path in life...

    I think it's up to whether you can have a propper boundaries in a relationship or not.
    And if you can't then that relationship isn't a relationship.

    And there's no point in marrying that person if the boundaries are not ironed out....


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    #98
    Doctor DooM
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 25,868 Mod ✭✭✭✭Doctor DooM


    philologos wrote: »
    Read the other posts. MagicMarker claimed a romantic non-sexual relationship is pretty much a friendship.

    I'll come to your other points later.

    I'd actually say the fault is yours there, no offence. I have plenty of relationships with people who I love dearly but are not romantic nor based around doing the dirty. I would think that's what he meant.


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    #99
    coffee_cake
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    I think if a person is Religious and follow the moral code of that Religion etc, they will more than likely be more faithful,loving,supportive etc

    And a non believer could be just as faithful,loving,supportive etc

    These are contradictory statements


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    #100
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    philologos wrote: »
    Read the other posts. MagicMarker claimed a romantic non-sexual relationship is pretty much a friendship.

    I'll come to your other points later.

    No, I said I've had plenty of relationships that didn't involve sex, they were called friendships. I did not claim that a romantic non-sexual relationship is just a friendship, by definition how could it be?


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    #101
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    bluewolf wrote: »
    I think if a person is Religious and follow the moral code of that Religion etc, they will more than likely be more faithful,loving,supportive etc

    And a non believer could be just as faithful,loving,supportive etc

    These are contradictory statements

    Not if your well balanced,maybe to you they are but to me your only trying to stoke something up ;)


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    #102
    coffee_cake
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    Northclare wrote: »
    Not if your well balanced,maybe to you they are but to me your only trying to stoke something up ;)

    To me, you've effectively written:

    A is more cold than B.

    B is just as cold as A.


    A religious person who follows their religion is going to be more loving and supportive than a non religious person: but a non religious person is just as loving and supportive.
    Can't have it both ways. They're the same or they aren't.


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    #103
    robindch
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 24,406 Mod ✭✭✭✭robindch


    Northclare wrote: »
    [...] but to me your only trying to stoke something up ;)
    bluewolf has just pointed out that what you've said is nonsensical. She's correct.

    Now, go deal with it :)


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    #104
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    Your only getting into the A and B s because your looking at it that way.

    I'm looking at it from a different perspective to you so were better off realizing were both indifferent and leave it be....


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    #105
    coffee_cake
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    Northclare wrote: »
    Your only getting into the A and B s because your looking at it that way.

    I'm looking at it from a different perspective to you so were better off realizing were both indifferent and leave it be....

    I'm looking at it from the point of view of making sense and being logically consistent, yes.

    If you want to post self contradictory statements to the point where you're not making any sense and nobody is going to read it, that's up to you - was trying to give you a heads up there.


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    #106
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    Well Robin I think I am correct,it's nonsensical to you and Wolfy but to me it's ok.
    Now you deal with it ;)


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    #107
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    Ok Bluewolf their the same.
    I went back over it and stood back and read it all over again.

    Sorry for the mix up

    :)


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    #108
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    Northclare wrote: »
    Well Robin I think I am correct,it's nonsensical to you and Wolfy but to me it's ok.
    Now you deal with it ;)

    I dont understand it either.

    A religious person is more likely to be more faithful, loving etc...
    A non religious person could be just as faithful, loving etc....

    So whats the difference?


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    #109
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    Nope.

    My other half's parents are god freaks and I find it very difficult to be in their company. Homophobic bible bashing nutters. Thankfully she is able to think for herself and the closest she comes to religion is arguing about the existance of god when she's drunk. I can tolerate this :D


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    #110
    robindch
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 24,406 Mod ✭✭✭✭robindch


    Northclare wrote: »
    I'm looking at it from a different perspective [...]
    I'm looking at it from the perspective of words having a meaning that we all agree on, and a language being used by one person to convey one or more ideas clearly to another person. You've failed in that task rather splendidly.

    If you think that writing meaningless gibberish is a useful way to spend your Friday morning, then well, whatevs dude -- you'll be on most people's ignore list pretty quickly, and probably tossed from the forum not long after that.

    In a written medium like here, you are what you write and frankly, my dear, you're very confused indeed.


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    #111
    robindch
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 24,406 Mod ✭✭✭✭robindch


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    My other half's parents are god freaks and I find it very difficult to be in their company. Homophobic bible bashing nutters.
    Reminds me of one moment during the summer when, briefly dropping in to see some familar relatives, Popette wandered into the kitchen and, out of the blue, began to deliver an impassioned sermon on abortion. The situation went from warm to cryogenic in under a nanosecond and yours truly had to leap to my feet, arms outstretched in front of Popette while wearing some heavy + dripping wet-weather gear -- it was an Irish summer after all -- to sing the Marseillaise in order to drown out the drone before the room turned nuclear.

    Fun times!


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    #112
    robindch
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 24,406 Mod ✭✭✭✭robindch


    Northclare wrote: »
    Just because your a moderator it doesn't make you any judge on how people think or live.
    I'm not judging how you think and live. As I said above, you're judged here on the quality of your prose and so far this morning, it's been fairly dismal. You can do better.

    I recommend popping out for coffee and coming back and having another go. We're a forgiving lot around here :)


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    #113
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    Ok Robin thanks for the suggestion :)

    It's hard to get across on Smart phones etc

    Sorry bout my reaction to you...


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    #114
    Ickle Magoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    I was going to say it depends how religious but on thinking about it - I don't think I could date/marry a religious person...

    I wouldn't want to live with religious iconography or any visible religion, ever get married in a church, baptise/christen my kids, I wouldn't want them brought up in a particular faith, roll my eyes every time census time came around, etc, etc. Rather than expecting a partner to keep their religion entirely to themselves or - worse - ignore the fact they aren't religious at all just part of the problem re the archaic sectarianism in state schools and the like it seems much easier to have a non-religious partner. That I find waxing lyrical about god/declarations of faith a complete turn off ensured it was never going to be a choice between head and heart anyway...


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    #115
    old hippy
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,441 ✭✭✭old hippy


    Forgive me for repeating myself but despite the fact me and the missus are not religious in the slightest, we do find a lot of beauty in the art and architecture of various faiths. Always visiting as many temples and churches as we can whilst abroad and we even got married in a temple, it was beautiful and there was no pressure on us to do so - we just decided it would be an occasion.


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    #116
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    old hippy wrote: »
    Forgive me for repeating myself but despite the fact me and the missus are not religious in the slightest, we do find a lot of beauty in the art and architecture of various faiths. Always visiting as many temples and churches as we can whilst abroad and we even got married in a temple, it was beautiful and there was no pressure on us to do so - we just decided it would be an occasion.

    The Islamic and other gardens designed by the faithful are also beautiful as beautiful as the buildings.

    I'm a garden designer myself and for some odd reason Christian gardens have a lot of phallic plants in their gardens lol


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    #117
    Ickle Magoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    old hippy wrote: »
    Forgive me for repeating myself but despite the fact me and the missus are not religious in the slightest, we do find a lot of beauty in the art and architecture of various faiths. Always visiting as many temples and churches as we can whilst abroad and we even got married in a temple, it was beautiful and there was no pressure on us to do so - we just decided it would be an occasion.

    We'd be the same...in fact we got married in a de-consecrated chapel so technically speaking, I've gone back on the no church bit. :D


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    #118
    old hippy
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,441 ✭✭✭old hippy


    Northclare wrote: »
    The Islamic and other gardens designed by the faithful are also beautiful as beautiful as the buildings.

    I'm a garden designer myself and for some odd reason Christian gardens have a lot of phallic plants in their gardens lol

    Reminds me of a park in Jeju Island, South Korea; Loveland, I think it's called :D


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    #119
    lynski
    Registered Users Posts: 1,585 ✭✭✭lynski


    I am atheist and my other half shares my views, but thinking about it I am not sure i could ever have a relationship with someone who was religious, i just would not respect their opinions if they profess to believe in a god or gods. Equally I would not be able to have any respect for the 'cultural catholic' someone who would pay lip-service to a religion is just as offensive, maybe more so.


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