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Would you date/marry a religious person?

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24

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    #32
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    I would date maybe,but not marry.
    I don't believe in marriage.
    Marriage is a religious sacrament,and anything similar is almost like a hybrid of the original.
    Im more spiritual than religious.


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    #33
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 34,481 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Marriage is only a religious sacrament in the eyes of a believer and when the appropriate mumbo-jumbo is spoken by the appropriate person in robes.
    A civil marriage is a legal contract, a public statement of intent and commitment before one's friends, family and society.

    We got married in a registry office, they expressly forbid religious music etc. (presumably because of divorced cultural Catholics who would otherwise try to make it into a quasi-religious ceremony :rolleyes: ) and to suggest that we were looking for something analogous to a religious ceremony in any way is totally wrong.

    I believe it is important that people can express their commitment to each other in a way which is recognised by society and the state and which has nothing whatsoever to do with any religion.

    Fingal County Council are certainly not competent to be making decisions about the most important piece of infrastructure on the island. They need to stick to badly designed cycle lanes and deciding on whether Mrs Murphy can have her kitchen extension.



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    #34
    philologos
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,479 ✭✭✭✭philologos


    Fizzlesque wrote: »
    No, I wouldn't see pagan or Buddhist spiritual leanings as off putting - I probably should have qualified my comment - I had the Abrahamic religions in mind.

    Interesting, why do you think you would have more objection to the supernatural beliefs of Christians and Muslims than those of pagan and Buddhists? I don't see why these faiths get an exemption from your opposition to supernaturalism?

    This topic has been interesting because I think the feeling is mutual. As a Christian I would want to spend the rest of my life with someone who understands who I am, and who would share in the mission of living and speaking for Jesus in daily life. It's also an obligation for those who follow Jesus to do everything to His glory, and to encourage others to do the same. That is especially true of family.


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    #35
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    iguana wrote: »
    Quite a few posters on this forum, who make well thought out, rational contributions to many discussions have pagan or Buddhist spiritual leanings. Do most people who are saying no to religious partners see that in the same way? As most of the comments so far have referred to Christian or Islamic religions.

    I feel the same way about all religions or belief systems. Again, 'leanings' is a broad term, perhaps there are people who like the notion of certain Buddhist ideas for example, and that is different to someone who lives their life with their Buddhism as the defining structure or philosophy.

    But anyone who believes in things that cannot be proven by science and lives their life around that belief system would be a no no for me.


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    #36
    eviltwin
    Registered Users Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    No. I have two friends who are very devout Catholics and I find that difficult enough at times so I can't imagine being married to one. My husband is a Catholic but non practising but even at that it has caused conflict where the children are concerned. I think if I was doing it again I'd prefer someone atheist.


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    #37
    Fizzlesque
    Registered Users Posts: 668 ✭✭✭Fizzlesque


    philologos wrote: »
    Interesting, why do you think you would have more objection to the supernatural beliefs of Christians and Muslims than those of pagan and Buddhists? I don't see why these faiths get an exemption from your opposition to supernaturalism?

    This topic has been interesting because I think the feeling is mutual. As a Christian I would want to spend the rest of my life with someone who understands who I am, and who would share in the mission of living and speaking for Jesus in daily life. It's also an obligation for those who follow Jesus to do everything to His glory, and to encourage others to do the same. That is especially true of family.

    Hello philogos, the part of your post I've put in bold probably best sums up my reasons for being so definite in my feelings regarding the Christian and Muslim faiths. As far as I'm aware (and my knowledge of those with pagan and Buddhist beliefs isn't exactly comprehensive, so I may be wrong) pagans and Buddhists aren't obliged to persuade others to believe what they believe.

    Also (again, as far as I'm aware) pagan beliefs and Buddhist beliefs don't presume humans are sinners in need of forgiveness (a concept I find particularly repugnant) or issue warnings of dire consequences after death if one hasn't chosen to be part of their particular belief system.

    It's possible there would be elements of those belief systems that I'd find impossible to accept, if I were to get involved with a pagan or a Buddhist, but I'm currently unaware of them, and so have (as yet) no strong negative thoughts and feelings towards them.

    If anything, the little I've read or heard of those two belief systems is more likely to resonate with my own personal mish-mash of ideas of what life is about and how I can be a better person during my time on this planet. The opposite is true of what I've read or heard about Christianity and Islam.

    All that said, I still have no desire to align myself with any of the many religious options there are to choose from. Be they pagan, Buddhist, Christian or Islamic. And I definitely wouldn't want someone in my life who felt it was their duty to persuade me otherwise.


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    #38
    fitz0
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,753 ✭✭✭fitz0


    Kidchameleon wrote: »
    Where did I say they couldn't talk about it?

    You're right, I made a poorly judged leap in your argument.

    If you're happy to spend your life with someone who thinks you will burn for eternity, that's fine with me. Even if they don't shovel that in your face, if they are Christian or Muslim and adhere to the traditions of those faith, that is what they believe will happen regardless of whether they are overt in it or not.


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    #39
    Gregor Samsa
    Registered Users Posts: 8,983 ✭✭✭Gregor Samsa


    Would you date/marry a religious person?

    Only if it was the Pope.


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    #40
    Turtwig
    Registered Users Posts: 26,578 ✭✭✭✭Turtwig


    phutyle wrote: »
    Only if it was the Pope.

    You do realise the Catholic concept of marriage is to have sex with the aim to reproduce children?


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    #41
    Sarky
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,967 ✭✭✭✭Sarky


    You saying the Pope can't have babies?


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFBOQzSk14c


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    #42
    Turtwig
    Registered Users Posts: 26,578 ✭✭✭✭Turtwig


    I really need to watch that movie again. :)


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    #43
    nozzferrahhtoo
    Registered Users Posts: 9,340 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    philologos wrote: »
    It's also an obligation for those who follow Jesus to do everything to His glory, and to encourage others to do the same.

    Speak for yourself. I have met Christians who see no such obligation. One girl I spoke with recently sees Christianity as a way of life for herself for example. She does not proselytize, preach, convert, or encourage anyone to do anything. She is in fact horrified at the notion.

    Instead she relies heavily on the "By their fruits you will know them" way of thinking from the Bible and merely represents her faith as best she can without talking about it or selling it.

    If someone asks her about her faith, as I did, then she will answer openly and honestly. She will tell you what things she thinks her faith tells her to do or not do.

    She never however goes around telling others what is sinful, right, wrong and so forth. Her faith is personal, a personal guide on how to live her own life, and she uses it in no way to influence the actions of others or to encourage others to do or believe anything.

    So lets stop pretending you speak for all Christians shall we, when clearly you do anything but, and many Christians are everything from horrified to vicariously embarrassed by you and your representation of both yourself and the faith you claim to share with them.


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    #44
    CerebralCortex
    Registered Users Posts: 3,809 ✭✭✭CerebralCortex


    Who in their right mind would want to get married in the first place anyway? :pac:


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    #45
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    CerebralCortex wrote: »
    Who in their right mind would want to get married in the first place anyway? :pac:

    Lol It's bad enough getting married in the first place,but the second time round is worse.

    I don't believe in marriage,im quite content being single and able to mingle :)


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    #46
    CerebralCortex
    Registered Users Posts: 3,809 ✭✭✭CerebralCortex


    Northclare wrote: »
    Lol It's bad enough getting married in the first place,but the second time round is worse.

    I don't believe in marriage,im quite content being single and able to mingle :)

    People change over time, I don't see fidelity as a virtue, especially if both parties have no more interest in each other.


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    #47
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    That's true.


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    #48
    Napper Hawkins
    Registered Users Posts: 1,903 ✭✭✭Napper Hawkins


    Dealbreaker.

    Massive turn off and that goes for fundi (looper), moderate (bets hedger) and Census (weak willed/minded).


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    #49
    Doctor DooM
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 25,868 Mod ✭✭✭✭Doctor DooM


    nozzferrahhtoo wrote: »
    Speak for yourself. I have met Christians who see no such obligation. One girl I spoke with recently sees Christianity as a way of life for herself for example. She does not proselytize, preach, convert, or encourage anyone to do anything. She is in fact horrified at the notion.

    Instead she relies heavily on the "By their fruits you will know them" way of thinking from the Bible and merely represents her faith as best she can without talking about it or selling it.

    If someone asks her about her faith, as I did, then she will answer openly and honestly. She will tell you what things she thinks her faith tells her to do or not do.

    She never however goes around telling others what is sinful, right, wrong and so forth. Her faith is personal, a personal guide on how to live her own life, and she uses it in no way to influence the actions of others or to encourage others to do or believe anything.

    So lets stop pretending you speak for all Christians shall we, when clearly you do anything but, and many Christians are everything from horrified to vicariously embarrassed by you and your representation of both yourself and the faith you claim to share with them.

    She's obviously not a true Christian, though.


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    #50
    nozzferrahhtoo
    Registered Users Posts: 9,340 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    Doctor DooM wrote: »
    She's obviously not a true Christian, though.

    You forgot to put a "TM" after that :)


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    #51
    sbsquarepants
    Registered Users Posts: 11,812 ✭✭✭✭sbsquarepants


    I wouldn't be too bothered if they were of the typical irish a la carte religious persuasion, but if they were actually properly religious then no - i wouldn't chose to spend my life with someone whose fundamental core beliefs i find so bizzare.


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    #52
    joseph brand
    Registered Users Posts: 4,537 ✭✭✭joseph brand


    Northclare wrote: »
    Lol It's bad enough getting married in the first place,but the second time round is worse.

    I don't believe in marriage,im quite content being single and able to mingle :)

    :o


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    #53
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    Doctor DooM wrote: »
    nozzferrahhtoo wrote: »
    Speak for yourself. I have met Christians who see no such obligation. One girl I spoke with recently sees Christianity as a way of life for herself for example. She does not proselytize, preach, convert, or encourage anyone to do anything. She is in fact horrified at the notion.

    Instead she relies heavily on the "By their fruits you will know them" way of thinking from the Bible and merely represents her faith as best she can without talking about it or selling it.

    If someone asks her about her faith, as I did, then she will answer openly and honestly. She will tell you what things she thinks her faith tells her to do or not do.

    She never however goes around telling others what is sinful, right, wrong and so forth. Her faith is personal, a personal guide on how to live her own life, and she uses it in no way to influence the actions of others or to encourage others to do or believe anything.

    So lets stop pretending you speak for all Christians shall we, when clearly you do anything but, and many Christians are everything from horrified to vicariously embarrassed by you and your representation of both yourself and the faith you claim to share with them.

    She's obviously not a true Christian, though.

    Says who ?


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    #54
    Northclare
    Closed Accounts Posts: 724 ✭✭✭Northclare


    joseph brand wrote: »
    Northclare wrote: »
    Lol It's bad enough getting married in the first place,but the second time round is worse.

    I don't believe in marriage,im quite content being single and able to mingle :)

    :o

    As I can see I have an online stalker too,thanks but no thanks Josef :S


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    #55
    Doctor DooM
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 25,868 Mod ✭✭✭✭Doctor DooM


    Northclare wrote: »
    Says who ?

    thats_the_joke.jpg


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    #56
    Gregor Samsa
    Registered Users Posts: 8,983 ✭✭✭Gregor Samsa


    Northclare wrote: »
    Says who?

    cf.: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_true_Scotsman


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    #57
    kylith
    Registered Users Posts: 17,736 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    Doctor DooM wrote: »
    She's obviously not a true Christian, though.

    TBH, she sounds like the 'trueist' Christian I've heard of. Sure didn't Jesus say not to go around preaching at people but to keep your praying to yourself?


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    #58
    Zamboni
    Registered Users Posts: 4,305 ✭✭✭Zamboni


    I know a closet atheist that has been in a longterm relationship with a religious partner. Tbh I don't know how he does it. I put it down to compartmentalisation similar to religious scientists.


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    #59
    Tim Robbins
    Registered Users Posts: 8,976 ✭✭✭Tim Robbins


    As other posters have said it really depends on how religious. They may not necessarily have to sit with you and laugh at the God channel but they shouldn't have an issue with you laughing at it.

    That's my situation. I just got satellite.


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    #60
    Penn
    Registered Users Posts: 33,444 ✭✭✭✭Penn


    Marry, not unless there were several agreements put in place first. I'd concede on getting married in a church (Church already counts me as Catholic, so I'd see no real harm in that), but no children getting baptised or going to Catholic school (I see real harm in that) and not going to Mass every week. My children will have no religion until they're old enough to decide if they want religion or not. Then, they're free to choose.

    But before all that, in terms of dating I'd equate religion to be like smoking: If I met a girl, really liked her and then found out she smoked, I could live with it as I've already decided I liked this girl. If I knew a girl smoked when I met her, sorry but no.

    Basically, I wouldn't choose to go out with a religious person, but if I went out with a girl and then found out she was religious, it would depend on how much I liked her.


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    #61
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    Penn wrote: »
    But before all that, in terms of dating I'd equate religion to be like smoking: If I met a girl, really liked her and then found out she smoked, I could live with it as I've already decided I liked this girl. If I knew a girl smoked when I met her, sorry but no.

    What if a previously non religious (non smoking!) person took up religion (or smoking!). And I mean, took it up in a fundamental style, became very immersed by it. I think I would have to treat it as I would alcoholism or drug addiction and detach away from that person and draw a line in the sand telling them that I couldnt be with them unless they stopped doing the harmful thing.


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