Mens Rights Thread

iptba · 30-05-2019 6:09pm

From the Irish Independent:

Liz Kearney: 'Men better at reading maps? Oh, get lost...'

https://www.independent.ie/opinion/comment/liz-kearney-men-better-at-reading-maps-oh-get-lost--38163067.html

So I was interested to read neuroscientist Gina Rippon's take on men, women and our respective map-reading abilities this week.

Gina works as a professor of cognitive neuro-imaging - fancy! - and delivered a lecture at the Hay Literary Festival in Wales where she said the accepted wisdom men are better map readers holds water. But, she says, this is mainly because they play with lots of Lego growing up, not Barbies, so have spent years honing spatial awareness skills.

I'm left wondering how thoroughly she tested the abilities of any of these so-called superior map-readers, or did she rely on their own versions of events? Because I may not know much about cognitive neuro-imaging, but I'm pretty familiar with the art of male self-deception.

Most of the men of my acquaintance are no better at map-reading than I am - they're just utterly unable to admit they don't know where they're going.

I very much doubt the neuroscientist simply depended on self-report.

Calhoun · 30-05-2019 6:27pm

Its opinion comment from a cabbage who is grasping at straws. Like the idiot who thought she had to hide her pregnancy to become a councillor.

iptba · 01-06-2019 2:50am

Boys in poor urban areas around the world are suffering even more than girls from violence, abuse and neglect, groundbreaking international research published Monday suggests.

The study in the Journal of Adolescent Health, along with similar new research, suggests an adequate focus on helping boys is critical to achieving gender equality in the longer term.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/health/boys-trauma-research-1.5142602

iptba · 03-06-2019 10:30pm

"Bull****: if you don't mean all men, don't use it"

https://gootbuttheich0u.tumblr.com/post/185326920599/bull****-if-you-dont-mean-all-men-then-dont-use

Makes a change from so many negative Tumblr posts I've seen about men.

iptba · 08-06-2019 3:07pm

iptba wrote: »

It will be interesting to see what effect so many people having genetic tests like with Ancestry will have. Cases of misattributed paternity or paternity fraud are showing up. The children and spouses (if alive) can be quite upset. Also I saw one woman complaining she wanted to know her biological father for medical history reasons.

Tears welled in her eyes as Christine Skipsey recalled the moment her world was turned upside down.

For the first 51 years of her life, the mother-of-two never for a moment questioned her own identity. But last summer, following considerable publicity about the illegal adoption scandal in Ireland, she and the woman she always knew as "mum", Helen Maguire, decided to get DNA tests.

https://www.independent.ie/irish-news/nuns-handed-me-wrong-baby-and-gave-mine-away-38193706.html

Silentcorner · 09-06-2019 10:04am

Men are more likely to be victims of domestic abuse.

https://vancouversun.com/opinion/columnists/douglas-todd-domestic-abuse-cuts-both-ways-and-differently-for-women-and-men?fbclid=IwAR2oEXsZUWxZAhR-EjNIUQJvn6uI-GMh7lcuTn8yxbwWqzA8D-7CCQvpUGs

You have to wonder how we find ourselves in a world that acts like it is the complete opposite! These are innocent men being abused in their homes who are being largely ignored.

citytillidie · 09-06-2019 5:30pm

Silentcorner wrote: »

Men are more likely to be victims of domestic abuse.

https://vancouversun.com/opinion/columnists/douglas-todd-domestic-abuse-cuts-both-ways-and-differently-for-women-and-men?fbclid=IwAR2oEXsZUWxZAhR-EjNIUQJvn6uI-GMh7lcuTn8yxbwWqzA8D-7CCQvpUGs

You have to wonder how we find ourselves in a world that acts like it is the complete opposite! These are innocent men being abused in their homes who are being largely ignored.

Because violence by woman against men is laughed at almost celebrated in the media and tv

the_pen_turner · 09-06-2019 5:41pm

citytillidie wrote: »

Because violence by woman against men is laughed at almost celebrated in the media and tv

exactly. look at johny depp and amber heard. everyone was calling for his head but as soon as the truth along with a shed load of evidene came to light nothing.
the media is very quiet and her career is growing rather than the witch hunt that went after depp

citytillidie · 12-06-2019 4:05pm

RTE last year had Hope Solo on their panel for the World Cup and the BBC have her this year for the Women's World Cup just have a look at her past she had to come here and no American channel would have her because of it.

H3llR4iser · 13-06-2019 11:33am

Apologies for coming late to the party, but I just saw the "financial abuse" thingie a page or two back. I find it...rather interesting.

Now, this is entirely anecdotal and based on my own experience but...I'd go out on a limb and say that I've almost exclusively saw that scenario reversed; Plenty of male colleagues, for example, literally have to ask for "permission" to buy something or go somewhere to their partners and often make jokes that their paycheck is something they just see flying by at the end of each month. Sure, some are joking - but I get the impression most are dead serious; And this is a recurring theme - I've seen it wherever I worked.

Personally, I've been in a similar situation - ex girlfriend insisted on moving in together, kept pretending to be looking for a job (she refused no less than 3 or 4 offers in one year, at the height of the recession, because they were "beneath her"), but in the end it was me with my non-stellar salary ( I was on something like 25k back then) having to foot all the bills. I was working 9-10 hours a day, often having to put in nights at the week end, always opting to work on bank holidays for the double pay, and could afford absolutely nothing; On top of that, she was dire at managing money - she'd go out and do food shopping for a single day...in Centra; Or she'd go and spend 100-200 on some dress or handbag she would then never wear or use...and she also racked up a frankly impressive credit card debt. i was just expected to stay silent and pay up whenever some bill came in the post; A few times I tried to talk to her, trying to get her to moderate her spending and use the money smarter (e.g. go to Lidl rather than buying day-to-day in Centra), but of course I was labeled as "controlling" and "abusive", especially when she basically got some of her friends to nose in as well (beautiful, I know).

In all of this it wasn't rare that I had to walk the 90 minutes to the office and another 90 minutes back the last week of the month, because I simply didn't have the change for the bus.

This just to bring a personal experience to the table, of the kind that is usually not heard of / laughed / ignored. Of course, I see all the above as exclusively my own fault - I should've walked out much much much earlier than the relationship eventually broke down, but hindsight is always 10/10, isn't it?

iptba · 13-06-2019 6:14pm

A positive article

Mum's the word: Happy Father’s Day to all the men creating wonderful memories
https://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/lifestyle/mums-the-word-happy-fathers-day-to-all-the-men-creating-wonderful-memories-930406.html

is_that_so · 13-06-2019 6:17pm

iptba wrote: »

A positive article

Meh, just another greeting card holiday. More guilting of sprogs!

iptba · 13-06-2019 10:51pm

ForestFire · 14-06-2019 5:10pm

I will post this in here as it seems like a good match...

Firstly, I will admit I only skimmed down through this article (I did search the article for "Men" and "Man" and it does not appear)
Secondly, Domestic violence against anyone is wrong and all victims should have equal support

https://www.rte.ie/brainstorm/2019/0610/1054532-the-issues-with-how-the-irish-media-represent-domestic-violence/

I mean talk about a complete farce of an Article...."how the Irish media represent domestic violence"

And then not one mention of how this can also affect Men, How it is more unlikely men will report it due to fear, and the stigma that it cannot happen this way, as men are "Stronger"...

Well done RTE in correcting the Misrepresentation....NOT.....

tmh106 · 14-06-2019 5:39pm

H3llR4iser wrote: »

Apologies for coming late to the party, but I just saw the "financial abuse" thingie a page or two back. I find it...rather interesting.

Now, this is entirely anecdotal and based on my own experience but...

How is what you describe abuse? You ex sounds like a not very nice person (to put it mildly) and I cannot understand why you stayed with her, but how was any of this abuse. As far as I can tell you were not being coerced into these arrangements, you may have been under unhappy with them (understandably) but you chose to continue with them.

iptba · 14-06-2019 6:05pm

ForestFire wrote: »

I will post this in here as it seems like a good match...

Firstly, I will admit I only skimmed down through this article (I did search the article for "Men" and "Man" and it does not appear)
Secondly, Domestic violence against anyone is wrong and all victims should have equal support

https://www.rte.ie/brainstorm/2019/0610/1054532-the-issues-with-how-the-irish-media-represent-domestic-violence/

I mean talk about a complete farce of an Article...."how the Irish media represent domestic violence"

And then not one mention of how this can also affect Men, How it is more unlikely men will report it due to fear, and the stigma that it cannot happen this way, as men are "Stronger"...

Well done RTE in correcting the Misrepresentation....NOT.....

Probably not that surprising that these entities tweeted links to the article without criticism:

https://twitter.com/SAFEIreland/status/1139551219645648896
https://twitter.com/NWCI/status/1139561921995296769
https://twitter.com/SVCCork/status/1139551206882381825

And probably not that surprising that the author calls herself a feminist:

https://twitter.com/AOBVanV

[COLOR=rgba(20, 23, 26, 1)]Anne O' Brien

[COLOR=rgba(101, 119, 134, 1)]@AOBVanV[/COLOR]

[/COLOR]
[COLOR=rgba(20, 23, 26, 1)]Media and gender. Feminist. Lecturer at Maynooth University
[/COLOR]

She explains herself how good media coverage is important:

How the media approaches this topic can impact on how much support agencies such as Women’s Aid and Safe Ireland get from the State to support their work in advocating for victims. How the media shapes the national understanding of domestic violence really matters for the women phoning the support lines.

iptba · 15-06-2019 3:49pm

ForestFire wrote: »

I will post this in here as it seems like a good match...

Firstly, I will admit I only skimmed down through this article (I did search the article for "Men" and "Man" and it does not appear)
Secondly, Domestic violence against anyone is wrong and all victims should have equal support

https://www.rte.ie/brainstorm/2019/0610/1054532-the-issues-with-how-the-irish-media-represent-domestic-violence/

I mean talk about a complete farce of an Article...."how the Irish media represent domestic violence"

And then not one mention of how this can also affect Men, How it is more unlikely men will report it due to fear, and the stigma that it cannot happen this way, as men are "Stronger"...

Well done RTE in correcting the Misrepresentation....NOT.....

Coverage can be skewed when victims are blamed in subtle ways. Victims are most usually blamed for their inaction when the question ‘Why didn’t she leave?’ is asked. This is the question posed in place of journalists asking why wasn’t the perpetrator sanctioned or removed from the home.

Perpetrators are similarly let off the hook when their actions are described as ‘out of character’ for a ‘pillar of the community’, when they are described as ‘flipping’ or as having ‘mental health issues’ in cases where there is no pre-existing evidence of any mental illness and questions about pre-existing patterns of coercive control are not examined.

I wonder whether she has the same attitude when the perpetrator is female. My impression is many people with similar views are inclined to make excuses when the perpetrator is female.

iptba · 16-06-2019 3:03pm

Heart-warming:

Ruth O’Connor asks four Irish creatives to write love letters to their Dads in time for Father’s Day
https://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/lifestyle/dear-dad-love-letters-to-the-old-man-on-fathers-day-930613.html

Kimsang · 16-06-2019 11:22pm

iptba wrote: »

I wonder whether she has the same attitude when the perpetrator is female. My impression is many people with similar views are inclined to make excuses when the perpetrator is female.

The 'excuse' I encounter the most is that women are perpetrators far less frequently. Obviously this is not a real excuse, and just a deflection(and in some cases not true). Getting a feminist to answer this properly is like getting a rabbit to use a toilet.

Interesting clip of Dr. Julia Shaw plugging her new venture(last year) spot.com. In it, she explains removing cognitive bias from an interviewer when dealing with victims by making the interviewer automated conversation.
Actually I quite liked the idea, until I realized someone has to program it.

I then found a more recent Sky News Interview with her
She uses all the usual feminist talking points to answer "Why do men behave violently towards women", while completely deflecting with "It rarely happens" when asked by the interviewer "Why do women behave violently towards men".

iptba · 18-06-2019 6:59pm

Parental alienation has been recognised by the World Health Organisation as a disorder. Hopefully this will bring more focus on it.

Drivetime on RTE Radio One has just had an interview on it. It was a little abstract; it would have been nice if more details had been given.

iptba · 20-06-2019 4:35pm

Just listening to discussion about the next EU leadership positions. Politicians saying at least one of top jobs must go to a woman. Also Ireland may be basically forced to propose a woman as our commissioner. I remember something similar happened with Maura Geoghegan Quinn.

iptba · 21-06-2019 3:29pm

https://twitter.com/hse_hr/status/1141688982855700486?s=11
https://twitter.com/paulreiddublin/status/1141776900349730816?s=11

iptba · 24-06-2019 2:21pm

https://www.thejournal.ie/communion-spending-parents-4692466-Jun2019/

The kids, themselves, meanwhile received an average of €617 for their first holy Communion this year. A quarter of children received more than €800.

On average, girls (€646) received more than boys (€587).

Now I'm not sure this means that much in the greater scheme of things, but it might balance up some other situation where there is some minor preference showed to boys on average.

H3llR4iser · 25-06-2019 12:55pm

iptba wrote: »

https://www.thejournal.ie/communion-spending-parents-4692466-Jun2019/

Now I'm not sure this means that much in the greater scheme of things, but it might balance up some other situation where there is some minor preference showed to boys on average.

Completely unrelated but...holy mother of the flying' spaghetti monster, 800 Euro to a 10 years old kid?

I think I got what would be roughly 52 Euro in today's money for my Communion. Granted, it was 29 years ago, but still

Also:

79% of the workforce in @HSELive are women.

Where are the "gender quotas" now? How is it positive that a (semi?) public organization employs almost exclusively one gender? And if the logical reasoning is just that you find overwhelmingly more women in these career paths then maybe, just maybe, the same quite logical reasoning can be applied to fields where there are "too many men"?

py2006 · 26-06-2019 5:58pm

H3llR4iser wrote: »

Where are the "gender quotas" now? How is it positive that a (semi?) public organization employs almost exclusively one gender? And if the logical reasoning is just that you find overwhelmingly more women in these career paths then maybe, just maybe, the same quite logical reasoning can be applied to fields where there are "too many men"?

Oh no you didn't!!!

You are now sooooooooooooooooooo misogynistic.

...Ghost... · 26-06-2019 7:36pm

tmh106 wrote: »

How is what you describe abuse? You ex sounds like a not very nice person (to put it mildly) and I cannot understand why you stayed with her, but how was any of this abuse. As far as I can tell you were not being coerced into these arrangements, you may have been under unhappy with them (understandably) but you chose to continue with them.

Switch the genders.

Apologies for coming late to the party, but I just saw the "financial abuse" thingie a page or two back. I find it...rather interesting.

Now, this is entirely anecdotal and based on my own experience but...I'd go out on a limb and say that I've almost exclusively saw that scenario
reversed
; Plenty of female colleagues, for example, literally have to ask for "permission" to buy something or go somewhere to their partners and often make jokes that their paycheck is something they just see flying by at the end of each month. Sure, some are joking - but I get the impression most are dead serious; And this is a recurring theme - I've seen it wherever I worked.

Personally, I've been in a similar situation - ex boyfriend insisted on moving in together, kept pretending to be looking for a job (he refused no less than 3 or 4 offers in one year, at the height of the recession, because they were "beneath him"), but in the end it was me with my non-stellar salary ( I was on something like 25k back then) having to foot all the bills. I was working 9-10 hours a day, often having to put in nights at the week end, always opting to work on bank holidays for the double pay, and could afford absolutely nothing; On top of that, he was dire at managing money - he'd go out and do food shopping for a single day...in Centra; Or he'd go and spend 100-200 on some clothes or gadget he would then never wear or use...and he also racked up a frankly impressive credit card debt. i was just expected to stay silent and pay up whenever some bill came in the post; A few times I tried to talk to him, trying to get him to moderate his spending and use the money smarter (e.g. go to Lidl rather than buying day-to-day in Centra), but of course I was labeled as "controlling" and "abusive", especially when he basically got some of his friends to nose in as well (beautiful, I know).

In all of this it wasn't rare that I had to walk the 90 minutes to the office and another 90 minutes back the last week of the month, because I simply didn't have the change for the bus.

This just to bring a personal experience to the table, of the kind that is usually not heard of / laughed / ignored. Of course, I see all the above as exclusively my own fault - I should've walked out much much much earlier than the relationship eventually broke down, but hindsight is always 10/10, isn't it?

Do you see it now?

iptba · 27-06-2019 9:55pm

Not discrimination per se though perhaps there is or has been so-called "positive discrimination"

On Wednesday, Aer Lingus launched a new campaign to attract women pilots, who now account for around one in ten of all pilots at the airline.

https://www.irishtimes.com/business/transport-and-tourism/aviation-careers-women-aren-t-really-applying-which-is-a-shame-as-it-s-a-great-job-1.3938204
---
Also:

On receiving the award, O’Gorman - a mother of four adult children, one of whom, Laura is currently training as an air traffic control assistant, said it “should be an encouragement for all girls to consider this exciting and rewarding career. Women aren’t really applying which is a shame as it is a great job.

iptba · 02-07-2019 12:52pm

I just came across the following my chance, so wanted to highlight its existence somewhere.
https://twitter.com/EP_GenderEqual
FEMM Committee PressVerified account
@EP_GenderEqual

News from the European Parliament Committee for Women's Rights & Gender Equality. Account managed by Nicolas Delaleu. RTs ≠ endorsement.

http://www.europarl.europa.eu/committees/en/femm/home.html

iptba · 03-07-2019 2:14am

I often feel male and female lives in the past were more complex than are sometimes presented. For what it is worth, I just came across the following about life in Sparta:

https://teymurvisuals.com/starpony/wtfhistory-jesuisuneetoile-like-guys

wtfhistory:

jesuisuneetoile:

Like, guys. Sparta was so kick ASS sometimes when it came to women. Spartan women were given these small knives so that if their husbands came home and tried to hit them or assault them, they had a weapon within reach. That weapon was for CUTTING THEIR HUSBANDS’ ****ING FACES so that when he went out in public everyone would know he was an asshole, abusing jerkface and they would publicly shame him.

LET’S JUST TALK ABOUT SPARTAN WOMEN FOR A SECOND.

In Sparta, women could own land and were considered citizens. THAT IS A HUGE BIG ****ING DEAL. Why? Because that was RARE AS **** and there are lots of places TODAY where women don’t even get that much.

Divorce was totally fine, and a woman could expect to keep her own wealth and get custody of the kids because paternal lineage wasn’t very important. And it didn’t make her a pariah! She could totally remarry, no big deal at all.

Spartan women participated in some ****in’ badass sporting events, too. And because they were expected to be as physically fit as the Spartan menfolk (who all had to serve compulsory military duties, btw, and couldn’t marry until they finished them at thirty) they didn’t have time for lots of swishy dresses. So they wore notoriously short skirts. According to some accounts, their thighs were visible at all times. HOLY ****.

Also, In Sparta men only got their names on their graves if they died in battle. And women? Women only got their names on their graves if they died in childbirth. THE SPARTANS COMPARED CHILDBIRTH TO ****ING BATTLE AND IT WAS VIEWED AS A GODDAMN BADASS AND HONORABLE WAY TO GO OUT.

****ING SPARTAN WOMEN. THIS DUDE HAD ****IN’ BETTER MAKE SURE SHE’S COOL WITH WHATEVER HE’S DOING, IF HE KNOWS WHAT’S ****IN’ GOOD FOR HIM.

iptba · 03-07-2019 3:22pm

(Not important)
https://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/world/dalai-lama-genuinely-meant-no-offence-with-his-comments-about-possibility-of-female-successor-934453.html

Dalai Lama

"Under his leadership, Tibetan nuns in exile have earned Geshe-ma degrees, indicating a high level of scholarship previously reserved only for male monks. His Holiness has frequently suggested that if we had more women leaders, the world would be a more peaceful place."

I've no idea whether this is correct or not. But it's a common theme, that public figures mention the world would be a better place with female leaders. If on average female leaders would be different, there would likely be areas where they are worse, as well as areas where they are better but the areas where they are worse don't tend to get mentioned.

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