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Marriage cert = €150, average Irish wedding cost in a recession= €29,000, why?

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    #152
    Bride2012
    Registered Users Posts: 294 ✭✭Bride2012


    Thank you so much for all of the replies. Having a big rethink at the moment and deciding what's most important to US as a couple.


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    #153
    mrsdewinter
    Registered Users Posts: 2,136 ✭✭✭mrsdewinter


    rubadub wrote: »
    I haven't been at any of my first cousins weddings, neither has my brother. My parents get invited to them, I have never expected to be.

    I can't believe people are still being pressurised to invite cousins to weddings! It's fine if you're particularly close to a cousin, but there's no way anybody should expect an invitation just because they share the same grandparents.

    OP, I know it's easy to say these things here online, but do have a rethink about what kind of a day you want to have. I have friends who've had mega weddings, and friends who opted for the registry office on a weekday. The registry office couple are no less married than the others.


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    #154
    RachaelVO
    Registered Users Posts: 3,108 ✭✭✭RachaelVO


    29KKKKKKKKKKKKKK Are you out of your mind. 29K for a fcuking party, cos that's all it is!!!

    When I got married, and I got married during the boom, I spent a total of 7k! I had the works. Now granted I had two favours, one was the car (Rolls) it belonged to a friend of my dads, and the second was my cake, one of my best and oldest friends made it for me!

    Having said that though, the owner of the hotel gave us tonnes of tips, we didn't necessarily use them, but when we were looking at menus she said have a meat choice and a veggie choice. Don't do more, people will either eat it or don't, and they'll always have something to moan about, so think of your wallet.

    When it came to inviting people, friends went top of the list. Cousins I was close to and aunts and uncles came next. Then cousins I had feck all contact with got afters invites. End of, and I would broke not argument over it! Invites were done from Viking, cost a fraction of the price and who care what they look like. Wedding favours were 10 crappy sweets, kinda reminiscent of the 10penny sweet bags you got years ago!

    The only truly big expenses I had were my dress (still done on the cheap) and my photographer, who was brilliant AND great value!

    You need to seriously sit down, cull your list, and all that ****e, cos if you can't afford it, you can't afford it. Don't let anyone pressure you into doing something you don't want. It's a party at the end of the day, and you can have a great party without spending that sort of money.

    You need that money to start of your marriage, and a party does not a marriage make!


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    #155
    Betty Draper
    Registered Users Posts: 45 ✭Betty Draper


    Holy god - 29k :eek:

    Me and OH are in the process of planning our wedding for April 2012. we havent told anyone and are not planning on telling them until much closer to the date.

    it is not going to cost us more then 3k all in.

    why would you let anyone tell you what to do - its your wedding not their :confused:


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    #156
    spoofilyj
    Registered Users Posts: 579 ✭✭✭spoofilyj


    Bride2012 wrote: »
    I'm getting married in June and wanted a small wedding but I got pressured by family and friends to make it bigger as 'you'll regret it if you don't'. Now I've a big, expensive wedding that I don't really want. I hear of this happening so often, usually parents having their own big guest list. Why do we do it to ourselves in Ireland?

    Fiona? Is that you?


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    #157
    lastlaugh
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,382 ✭✭✭lastlaugh


    OP, why not do it on the cheap like a lot of people these days and fly off to Spain or somewhere?


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    #158
    Gmol
    Registered Users Posts: 1,281 ✭✭✭Gmol


    Bride2012 wrote: »
    We're paying for it ourselves, my parents are giving us 2k as a present but want 60 from their list not including relations. At last count the guest list was 260 as we've big families. We may decide to elope; )


    Sorry but your parents are pulling the p***, put them straight and tell them you can't afford it and the wedding will include immediatate family & your close friends. They're putting you in debt before you even get started


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    #159
    uck51js9zml2yt
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,268 ✭✭✭✭uck51js9zml2yt


    We had 66 people and got the early bird menu at 18e a head plus drinks. came to about 1 1/2k and everyone was happy with a choice of 5 dishes per course whuch included steak.


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    #160
    DublinWriter
    Registered Users Posts: 9,555 ✭✭✭DublinWriter


    Back in my wedding-band-drummer days we all observed that the bigger the wedding the quicker the separation.


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    #161
    the_syco
    Registered Users Posts: 37,297 ✭✭✭✭the_syco


    Bride2012 wrote: »
    Why do we do it to ourselves in Ireland?
    Because the bride and grrom have no spine?


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    #162
    Paparazzo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,398 ✭✭✭Paparazzo


    Save money on the wedding and spend it on the honeymoon.


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    #163
    Bride2012
    Registered Users Posts: 294 ✭✭Bride2012


    spoofilyj wrote: »
    Fiona? Is that you?

    Nope but good to know that I'm not the only one.


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    #164
    m5ex9oqjawdg2i
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,221 ✭✭✭✭m5ex9oqjawdg2i


    30K on a wedding? That would be a serious debt for me. For others it would be affordable. Depends on the person. For me it will be a very small wedding and a very nice meal afterwards. Close friends and family, that's all...

    Some people are fcuking insane when it comes to crap like this.


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    #165
    newballsplease
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,751 ✭✭✭newballsplease


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    Maybe think twice about getting married if you still do what your parents tell you?

    Quality


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    #166
    rebelmomma
    Registered Users Posts: 209 ✭✭rebelmomma


    If families thought anything of you they wouldn't be putting pressure on you. Shocking in this day and age. Parents don't neccesarily have it either so I don't agree that they should be asked to cough up. If you are having a wedding you don't want it probably won't be an enjoyable day for you. Me and hubby did it all for 11 and half k for 150 sitting down for 3 courses and that was just doing it differently (using caterer in a gaa club as opposed to a hotel that alot of people had used for weddings and had been to weddings already) and using families offers of help. We are as married as my sis in law who spent 40k and Will and Kate who spent way more.


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    #167
    lab man
    Registered Users Posts: 1,830 ✭✭✭lab man


    Bride 2012 if its any use to you i've been to 2 receptions this year thank god one pretty big at a country hse an all that stuff about 200 at i think it was a great day and the other was 90 odd guests all i can say is that the second was by far the better and by talking to the hubbies after wards the small wedding everyone was known to both bride and groom and the big wedding not so much i'm only talking as a guest thats all i would expect that alot wont go anyway with the reccession, because both told me that a good few didn't give a penny to the couples, enjoy and best of luck to ye both!!


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    #168
    iguana
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 12,915 Mod ✭✭✭✭iguana


    Bride2012 wrote: »
    I'm getting married in June and wanted a small wedding but I got pressured by family and friends to make it bigger as 'you'll regret it if you don't'. Now I've a big, expensive wedding that I don't really want. I hear of this happening so often, usually parents having their own big guest list. Why do we do it to ourselves in Ireland?

    See, I would have regretted it if we did. I really didn't want a hotel wedding and a big expensive dress. I don't enjoy that aspect of weddings I attend as a guest. I enjoy the spending a fun day with family/friends part of weddings, but not the mediocre meal and somewhat crappy disco part. And I really, really, really, really, really hate the mass part.


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    #169
    Bride2012
    Registered Users Posts: 294 ✭✭Bride2012


    Thanks everyone, it's great to hear from so many people who had a small wedding and enjoyed it. It does make me wonder though, if there are so many small weddings and the AVERAGE is €29,000, how much are the people with big weddings actually spending to bring the average up to this level?


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    #170
    bodhrandude
    Registered Users Posts: 12,459 ✭✭✭✭bodhrandude


    fran oconnor wrote: »
    Your perents are wrong for putting you and your partner under such presure imo, it seems like its a keeping up with the Joneses situation if you ask me. Its not your problem that your perents went to their friends son's wedding. Just look after yourselves. You seem like a smart enough person for questioning this type of spending anyway so don't go along with it for the sake of others.
    Perents at times can have to much to say for themselves in situations like this.

    Lol.

    If you want to get into it, you got to get out of it. (Hawkwind 1982)



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    #171
    Wetai
    Registered Users Posts: 773 ✭✭✭Wetai


    bodhrandude wrote: »
    Lol.
    LOL


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    #172
    TheZohanS
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,582 ✭✭✭✭TheZohanS


    Bride2012 wrote: »
    Thanks everyone, it's great to hear from so many people who had a small wedding and enjoyed it. It does make me wonder though, if there are so many small weddings and the AVERAGE is €29,000, how much are the people with big weddings actually spending to bring the average up to this level?

    Does your OH have a good job? A few quid in the bank etc?


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    #173
    Bride2012
    Registered Users Posts: 294 ✭✭Bride2012


    [/QUOTE]

    Does your OH have a good job? A few quid in the bank etc?[/Quote]
    We both have jobs that will hopefully pay well some day. We're in the early days of our careers.


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    #174
    the_syco
    Registered Users Posts: 37,297 ✭✭✭✭the_syco


    I'm thinking a bulk of the €29,000 is the hotel for the people, the meal for the people, etc. All pre-paid, of course... :rolleyes:


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    #175
    scotty_irish
    Closed Accounts Posts: 427 ✭✭scotty_irish


    i just don't want to buy dinner for a bunch of people i don't like.


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    #176
    Cee-Jay-Cee
    Registered Users Posts: 12,235 ✭✭✭✭Cee-Jay-Cee


    We got married in spain, invited 100 guests. 65 came along and we had a great time. There were very few aunts/uncles/cousins (many of which i havent seen in over 20 years - why should i invite complete strangers to MY wedding...i wasnt at theirs!)

    If you and your fiance dont want a big wedding then dont have one. I was at a wedding a couple of years ago where there were over 450 guests. It was like a cattle mart with the vast majority of guests being friends of the couples parents. The only good thing was half them had either died or fallen asleep by 10pm and had to be taken home/buried...leaving the able bodied younger guests to drink themselves into oblivion!


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    #177
    silly
    Registered Users Posts: 1,722 ✭✭✭silly


    I'm not really sure where you are getting this €29,000 from.
    I got married a few weeks ago, 120 guests, 5 course meal, the dress, photographer, video etc, it only came to about €15,000.
    Oh and the €150 doesn't actually include your cert. You have to pay €8 for that.


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    #178
    Dubh Geannain
    Registered Users Posts: 3,397 ✭✭✭Dubh Geannain


    Wedding with 250 guests including 5 and a half week honeymoon in Australia + Fiji. Final cost (after adding in wedding gifts): €8,000.
    No loans were taken and it was never an option. If we couldn't afford it, it wasn't purchased.

    Different strokes for different folks though. My advice, to repeat the most common reply on this thread, do what YOU WANT. Not what others want. We did and have zero regrets.




    Interested in buying some unwanted wedding gifts PM me ;-) Trying to recoup costs for that damn wedding


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    #179
    Chiggers
    Registered Users Posts: 12 ✭Chiggers


    LiamN wrote: »
    LOL


    LOL.


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    #180
    universe777
    Registered Users Posts: 469 ✭✭universe777


    .


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    #181
    sh1tstirrer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,489 ✭✭✭sh1tstirrer


    Bride2012 wrote: »
    We're paying for it ourselves, my parents are giving us 2k as a present but want 60 from their list not including relations. At last count the guest list was 260 as we've big families. We may decide to elope; )
    260 is nothing I was at a wedding with 380 guests there were 500 invites given out :eek:


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