Haven't touched a drop in...

RMIrish24

Hi Guys,
Well don't know what really to be saying on this site, I am trying to give up the drink as it really doesnt suit me and I have blackouts most nights Im drinking which is not good! I cant just have one drink, im constantly thinking of the next drink! I tried going to AA but it was full of people alot older than me, im in my late 20s n a girl! I feel that I am a binge drinker, i dont drink during the week but when friday comes id be on bender until sunday! Which i know myself is not right! I have taken myself outta the pub scene with work colleagues as I think they have seen enough of my drunken antics to last a lifetime! It is just such a social aspect of my life, and real struggle!

a fat guy

Moderating worked for me until the second drink. After that, if I go for another then I know that I'd have around 5 or 6 pints before the night is out.

RMIrish24

my problem is I wouldnt stop at 5/6 id drink until i was absolutely smashed! Spend easily 200euro a night!

JonBon27

41 days and counting

emmabrighton

Hi Everyone,

I am posting because I feel lost at the moment. Because we can't talk about outside help which enabled us to realise that drinking is a muggs game, I will just say that I went on this holiday which guaranteed that I would not be in the vacinity of a pint for 6 weeks. It was a great boost to me but I heard people say that all your problems wouldnt be problems anymore in time and that the low moods you had would disappear because it was actually your drinking that was causing it.

After my lovely holiday, the reassurance I got lasted about a week but now in the cold light of day, I realise that all my problems still exist. It was suggested that I go to talk to someone to get my problems off my chest. This I do, but the negative feelings don't go away. I was spending about 30-50 euro on drink every week and I put down my lack of money to that. Thing is, I now pay 70 euro per week to talk to someone and it doesnt seem to do anything except cost more money.

There are these discussion groups that I attended but I am not driving now so cannot get to the groups anymore. Also, I hate the stigma of the A word and my husband is always throwing that in my face. If it was just drink causing me to feel depressed, then why do I still feel that way now? I will be 4 months since I last had a drink next tuesday and as far as I can see, things have only gotten worse for me. I am having more problems in work than I ever did when I was coming in with a hangover. In fact, they used to always tell me that I was brilliant and promising me promotions and extensions of my contract. My financial difficulties are still there. I dont feel like I am getting any support and some days I wonder "is this all life is"?

People talk about this amazing honeymoon period that happens once you stop and mean to stay stopped drinking. When will this kick in?

Sorry for being so pessimistic. Does anyone ever feel like nothing has changed since they stopped and they were expecting everything to change? Since stopping, I never crave any sort of drink. Sometimes on a hot day when things are looking rozy I will think - today is a perfect day for a glass of prosecco at a wedding but never have I thought of going into a shop and buying anything. This was my biggest fear at the start but it never happened.

Cheers

a fat guy

emmabrighton wrote: »

Hi Everyone,

I am posting because I feel lost at the moment. Because we can't talk about outside help which enabled us to realise that drinking is a muggs game, I will just say that I went on this holiday which guaranteed that I would not be in the vacinity of a pint for 6 weeks. It was a great boost to me but I heard people say that all your problems wouldnt be problems anymore in time and that the low moods you had would disappear because it was actually your drinking that was causing it.

After my lovely holiday, the reassurance I got lasted about a week but now in the cold light of day, I realise that all my problems still exist. It was suggested that I go to talk to someone to get my problems off my chest. This I do, but the negative feelings don't go away. I was spending about 30-50 euro on drink every week and I put down my lack of money to that. Thing is, I now pay 70 euro per week to talk to someone and it doesnt seem to do anything except cost more money.

There are these discussion groups that I attended but I am not driving now so cannot get to the groups anymore. Also, I hate the stigma of the A word and my husband is always throwing that in my face. If it was just drink causing me to feel depressed, then why do I still feel that way now? I will be 4 months since I last had a drink next tuesday and as far as I can see, things have only gotten worse for me. I am having more problems in work than I ever did when I was coming in with a hangover. In fact, they used to always tell me that I was brilliant and promising me promotions and extensions of my contract. My financial difficulties are still there. I dont feel like I am getting any support and some days I wonder "is this all life is"?

People talk about this amazing honeymoon period that happens once you stop and mean to stay stopped drinking. When will this kick in?

Sorry for being so pessimistic. Does anyone ever feel like nothing has changed since they stopped and they were expecting everything to change? Since stopping, I never crave any sort of drink. Sometimes on a hot day when things are looking rozy I will think - today is a perfect day for a glass of prosecco at a wedding but never have I thought of going into a shop and buying anything. This was my biggest fear at the start but it never happened.

Cheers

I don't mean to joke at your expense, but are you the type of person who see's the glass as always being half empty?

I promised to never drink again last Monday, purely because I started to think that it was a waste of my time and money. I immediately felt good about giving something up, then started giving up other things and reducing others. I don't play on the playstation as much as I used to and I can get work done much more easily.

I think that your problem is that you aren't taking full advantage of the fact that you've just kicked alcohol entirely. Have you even given yourself a pat on the back for giving something up?

And you should try to pick up a new hobby too, to distract you from any vices you may have. I started to play the harmonica, for example.

seanrose

I feel your pain emma

i have said so many times on this thread that life is a bitch at times but alcohol doesnt make it any easier and suffering with hangovers make things in life seem so harder and tougher to overcome and alcohol does not make these problems go away but at least i know that i can deal with them better and with a clear head

theres no magic wand in life that makes problems disappear

Does anyone ever feel like nothing has changed since they stopped and they were expecting everything to change?
na dont honestly thing i expect anything to change,i had said in an earlie post that my ex and i were trying to see where things were gonna go between us but it hasnt and im fine with that,i need to put that in the past and continue with my rehabilition


all i can say emma is if you where to go drinking today and end up plastered and hungover tomorrow how will you be feeling tomorrow,just ask yourself will it make you feel any better and will your problems have disappeared

Sunnyisland

I posted this before, it says a lot.............................

When I ditched the booze I thought

My life would change....

I would become happier, more confident, everything would slot into place, my troubles would be over, I would be on easy street, Nothing would worry me or upset me, life would be a piece of cake, my brain would work differently, I would be happy all the time, I would no longer have depression or sad thoughts, I would have a wonderful life, people would applaud me, fanfares would sound and angels would sing..

NOTHING prepared me for the brutal reality that this wasn't the case.
I felt cheated and disappointed and somewhat angry that I had put in all the work to kick booze and I didn't feel any different, my life was NOT any better, and yes I wondered why I even bothered...what was the bloody point..you were meant to feel better..right?? It was meant to get better? Life was meant to change.....

It didn't except for...

My clear head in the mornings and the feel of clarity on waking...

No hangovers, headaches and sick tummy..

No flashbacks of things said and done and no cringe factor upon remembering.

The bedtime stories now told lovingly to my grandchildren instead of the excuses as to why I couldnt read them as I had to go and relax with first drink of the evening or the pub.

The money I have saved by not buying alcohol and smokes.

The compliments I have received telling me how well I look.

The feeling of freedom knowing that alcohol has no hold over me, I have broken free of its power and I am living independant of it.

The problems that are there are now being dealt with and not swept under the carpet in a drunken haze.

The little pieces of me that emerge day to day...new pieces of my personality that have been stifled by alcohol.

The feeling of LIVING and not just drifting along from day to day doing the same old thing and expecting different results.

The feeling of acomplishment, and getting to like myself again ( I am not at the loving myself bit yet but still working on it, we are all a work in progress)

The knowledge that, although I felt like a fish out of water the first few times I went out socially, it is slowly but surely getting much better and easier to handle and when I look around and see some of the antics going on , I feel blessed that I have made the decision not to be the ringleader any more.

The chance to FEEL........I mean really feel...all my emotions...without the crippling distorted illusion of alcohol..I can identify my feelings and deal with them accordingly.

And finally the realisation that my problems are still there, money worries still present, sadness, fear and confusion are with me on a regular basis...BUT I can deal with them now...feel them, understand them and know why I am feeling this way..instead of burying them or intensifying them with the help of alcohol.

In conclusion....life is not all sweetness and light, not the perfect world I did expect it to be..but it is a Utopia in comparison to the one I was existing in and for that I will be eternally grateful.

seanrose

great post realies

can agree that all my problems are still present but can deal with them better

sometimes feel what is the point in going off it but im not the person that people are laughling at any more being the clown or the paranoia that exists on a monday morning

but realies how do you now deal with the past and the mistakes that you made while having problems with alcohol,i accept the mistakes i have made in the past but why is it that my past will still come back to haunt me and i cant seem to sake off this noos around my neck

Sunnyisland

seanrose wrote: »

great post realies

can agree that all my problems are still present but can deal with them better

sometimes feel what is the point in going off it but im not the person that people are laughling at any more being the clown or the paranoia that exists on a monday morning

but realies how do you now deal with the past and the mistakes that you made while having problems with alcohol,i accept the mistakes i have made in the past but why is it that my past will still come back to haunt me and i cant seem to sake off this noos around my neck

Seanrose what's behind you is done. There is nothing that you can do to change what has happened, and I know from experience that dwelling on mistakes of the past does nothing but crush the spirit and waste any positive energy that we may have. I don't ever want to forget my past though. It's important to me. It is part of my make-up and I have had some wonderful times with some beautiful people and I've also had some darker times, when I thought there was little to do but fade away.Learn from your past but dont live in it. Keep moving forward :-)
__________________

man the van

It's really great reading this forum, I was on it the last time I 'decided' to quit!! Hopefully this time it's for real. I drank last Saturday night and for me, I've just had enough! I'm the type of person who just cannot stop once I start, I drink to black out. I'm generally happy with my lot but I've now come to the conclusion that the vast majority of negative experiences in my life stem from alcohol. I'm 29 now and feel the time is right. When I do drink I turn in to a person that I am ashamed of, I get 3 day hangovers, along with the depression and paranoia that comes with it. I just want to be free from this curse. I love the feeling of having a few pints with friends, this I will miss, but the consequences for me now are just too negative. Anyways here's 2 days and counting!!

James__10

I've been lurking through this thread over the past few weeks reading through peoples stories and I have to say well done to everyone who have binned the drink for good anyway this is my story.

I'm a 19 year old male who is unemployed I started drinking at about 16 and when I was around 17 I started going out proper ( heading to nightclubs pubs) at least once a week since then. I decided to walk home one night from a night club and ended up in hospital had a blackout on the way home and don't know whether I fell or got beaten up this happened about 14 months ago. Anyway i've decided to give up for good ( well hopefully ) i'm spending most of my money drinking the hangovers are awful and the fear would kill a man.

Its going to tough especially with me been so young and surrounded by mates who love the drink. Anyone got any tips for a young fella like me to stay off the drink.

gillapino

Hi first time posting in this thread. I'm 20 and started drinking around 16 or 17 because all my friends were i suppose and a few of my friends were a little older and made it out to be the cool thing to do, I'd never been to into it just did it because my friends did, anyway i could see some of my friends when they drunk, just acting totally different and embaressing themselves so much getting with different lads all the time, and just thought this isnt for me, so last year i just decided it was such a waste of money, and the thought of not remembering what you did the night before and the horrible feeling in the morning just made me wanna stop completely ! havent had a drink in over a year, but i've lost a good few friends, just made me realise they werent really friends in the first place. My boyfriend who i've been with nearly 2 years isnt a big drinker at all either has made it so much easier too, and now i think i would never consider being in a relationship with someone who was into drinking. SO this is so long just needed to get this off my chest.

Wingman2010

gillapino wrote: »

Hi first time posting in this thread. I'm 20 and started drinking around 16 or 17 because all my friends were i suppose and a few of my friends were a little older and made it out to be the cool thing to do, I'd never been to into it just did it because my friends did, anyway i could see some of my friends when they drunk, just acting totally different and embaressing themselves so much getting with different lads all the time, and just thought this isnt for me, so last year i just decided it was such a waste of money, and the thought of not remembering what you did the night before and the horrible feeling in the morning just made me wanna stop completely ! havent had a drink in over a year, but i've lost a good few friends, just made me realise they werent really friends in the first place. My boyfriend who i've been with nearly 2 years isnt a big drinker at all either has made it so much easier too, and now i think i would never consider being in a relationship with someone who was into drinking. SO this is so long just needed to get this off my chest.

I was much the same as yourself. Gave up when I was 25. Nearly 2 & a half years since I had a drink. The best thing I've ever done. Can't say I really lost friends though. Initially though it took a while for my mates to accept it. All good now though. I avoid some situations like stag weekends unless a very close mate is getting married. Just couldn't spend a whole weekend stuck in a pub! However I do love going out I'm generally the last person to leave the dance floor.

My only problem unfortunately to meet a girl who trusts me :-( A lot of girls think I've somw hidden pass just because I don't drink or something serious happened. I find this very frustrating when I'm just a 27 year old Irish person who chooses not to drink, single and very proud to say I don't drink :-)

Cushtie

Wingman2010 wrote: »

I was much the same as yourself. Gave up when I was 25. Nearly 2 & a half years since I had a drink. The best thing I've ever done. Can't say I really lost friends though. Initially though it took a while for my mates to accept it. All good now though. I avoid some situations like stag weekends unless a very close mate is getting married. Just couldn't spend a whole weekend stuck in a pub! However I do love going out I'm generally the last person to leave the dance floor.

My only problem unfortunately to meet a girl who trusts me :-( A lot of girls think I've somw hidden pass just because I don't drink or something serious happened. I find this very frustrating when I'm just a 27 year old Irish person who chooses not to drink, single and very proud to say I don't drink :-)

Just said I'd check in to this thread again. off it now about 14 months now. my experience has been very simialr to Wingmans above.

in fact was at a wedding yesterday, great day, out on the floor dancing from the get go, before I would have to be well oiled to even think about getting up dancing,
Did have the usual people asking me about why I wasn't drinking, one person even asked me was it because I got agressive with drink, this person never even met me before!!!

It was great then to be able to sit into th car and spin home when it was over and wake up fresh this morning.

a fat guy

As the only sober person out of all my friends last night, I decided to liven things up by mixing peanuts with coke (Read about it in a book).

It's an acquired taste... And dangerously fizzy.

gillapino

Yeh i know what ya mean ! i'm the same ! people always question me saying asking why i dont drink ? did i have a problem with drink ? or omg that must be so boring what do you do ?or presume i'm either really boring, or into drugs ! In college i'm one of 3 that doesnt drink out of about 40 in my class. I'm not the biggest fan of nightclubs either not really my scene, more like going out for dinner or going to a concert or cinema ! So good to talk to likeminded people !

RNC

James__10 wrote: »

I've been lurking through this thread over the past few weeks reading through peoples stories and I have to say well done to everyone who have binned the drink for good anyway this is my story.

I'm a 19 year old male who is unemployed I started drinking at about 16 and when I was around 17 I started going out proper ( heading to nightclubs pubs) at least once a week since then. I decided to walk home one night from a night club and ended up in hospital had a blackout on the way home and don't know whether I fell or got beaten up this happened about 14 months ago. Anyway i've decided to give up for good ( well hopefully ) i'm spending most of my money drinking the hangovers are awful and the fear would kill a man.

Its going to tough especially with me been so young and surrounded by mates who love the drink. Anyone got any tips for a young fella like me to stay off the drink.

read allen carrs book how to control alcohol and get involved in a sport or join a gym, me personally i do both, i train 6 days a week (3 in the gym, 3-4 bjj) and have never felt better, fitter, younger

paddy1977

Lads i keep saying it, i think Astronomy is a great hobbie for none drinkers, outside of the fact when you get into it and get your own telescope its so interesting, there are loads of Astronomy clubs around, and when do most people go stargazing, on a Saturday nite, the hardest nite when your off the drink! Im just getting into Astrophotography now

toastedpickles

See I'd love to get into astronomy, I've got a telescope and its a pretty decent one too but its just sitting there, I'm from kildare and there's not a club in the place so any ideas?

paddy1977

Ya ive just been looking at i reckon the closest to you is http://www.southdublinastronomy.org/ Kildare would only be an hour from Dublin at the most would it, maybe you could hook up with someone from that group, maybe send them an email, there might be some people there from Kildare!

sunflower27

Over 4 months now and was at a wedding on Saturday. Am flying it now and never felt better

hubba

Excellent, Sunflower27. You have passed the ultimate litmus test - a sober Irish wedding.

I've done three in the past 12 months so I consider myself a well and truly a 100% bone fide, qualified Teetotaller.

I feel I can do anything now!

Sappa

Joining the team here,gave up for 18 mths before and did a few month stints here and there.
Whilst I really enjoy the few hrs of fun the next couple of days are brutal and I train so hard,eat well etc I don't see the point in putting this toxic juice into my system anymore.
Last drink was a few days ago and i have set certain goals now,spend more time with the wife do some things I have put on the long finger.
I really hope to post back here in 1 yr and say 1 yr sober folks,so let's wait and see.

Shall be 7 months off drink this Saturday.

seanrose

Sappa wrote: »

Joining the team here,gave up for 18 mths before and did a few month stints here and there.
Whilst I really enjoy the few hrs of fun the next couple of days are brutal and I train so hard,eat well etc I don't see the point in putting this toxic juice into my system anymore.
Last drink was a few days ago and i have set certain goals now,spend more time with the wife do some things I have put on the long finger.
I really hope to post back here in 1 yr and say 1 yr sober folks,so let's wait and see.

good luck sappa,mind you setting a goal for the year in my opinion is a massive goal to try and reach but if you did 18 months before there aint any reason why you cant reach your goal

insanity50

22 days.

small steps.

7 months sober . Literally had the hardest few days in my 7 months off drink too. Was away for the weekend with friends and drink was around me 24/7, the old me would have went nuts on every substance known to man but I had the choice to say I didn't want to go back to that and I didn't. Still enjoyed myself apart from the cup final result but really was a milestone as was very testing at times.

It's just great to know that if I keep to what I know works I'll never have to go back to that ****ty place I was at the end of my drinking. I know which lifestyle I prefer.

paddy1977

Well done, but as the saying goes, if you keep going to a hairdressers you'll eventually get a hair cut, i avoid all occasions unless its really really important, i know its a tough one though if all the buddies have something planned!

Indeed was just something do with work too so was something I just got on with. Aware not to put myself in positions like that again regularly. Just makes things harder