Haven't touched a drop in...

quinrea01

GRMA wrote: »

About three months today.

I found once I broke the pattern of what I normally did every day it really helped and got much easier.

I've gotten some of the "you're no craic now" crap from some people but I see now that there is a big difference between drinking buddies and actual friends.

"Drinking buddies" are annoyed there is one less person to drink with and help them normalize their behavior in their head.

Friends have by and large been supportive and we've started doing other stuff besides drinking, which I think we have all found better than sitting in the pub planning, but never doing, these things.

Great stuff GRMA. You got over the Paddy's Day trap and still on the staright and narrow. Don't ever worry about your drinking buddies thinking you're no longer any 'craic'. Those who truly have your best wishes at heart will cheer you on and those who might be feeling a bit guilty and concerned about their own drinking habits will be less enthusiastic and might even cut you down behind your back. Bet you don't miss the sickening hangovers, loss of memory and those depressing guilt feelings. Also, you'll have a bit more money for yourself. Keep soldiering on and good luck to all.

JonBon27

407 days:) never been better. Lost a few mates that werent really mates. Focusing on my interests and being me and not someone im pretending to be...... going to college, flying with work, loving life.... who would have thought it, sun is shining and im loving life;)

the big herm

107 days, feel incredible both physically and mentally. :):)

derry dirtfisher

thats day 6182 off it for me. think ill stay sober tomorrow too

good luck, guys

derry dirtfisher

figs666 wrote: »

17 years off the beer , well done

thanks, it wasnt easy getting there and i know that im one of the lucky ones so i treat sobriety as a very special gift and it will always be the number 1 priority in my life...nothing or noone is more important

seanrose

hi ladies and gentlemen

it has been a long time since I have posted on this forum.

Have had no drink in 20 days. I can go without drink for long periods of time but then overdo it when I do drink. I didnt drink paddys day or easter weekend,Its funny that them occassions I dont even think about drinking nor does it interest me.

The reason I have decided to reconnect with this forum is as I feel I have been given another oppurtunity with love. My last relationship broke down and drink had a major part in that. I am determined to not let this happen this time and if it does there is only one person to blame and that is me.

Now here is the thing. I dont feel strong enough to be able to stay away from drink but also know I havent got the ability to moderate.

I am heading over to where she is at college in 2 weeks time and I am concentrating just getting over that weekend without drink becoming an issue but also know that I cant avoid it.To be fair she knows I have a bad relationship with alcohol but I havent really done it in front of her as she is away at times. We have known each other a good while and our relationship is moving up in gears and I dont want to put this relationship in reverse gear by my drinking

Thanks for listening

quinrea01

Don't drop the head, Seanrose. No one said it would be easy, but you're headed in the right direction. One day at a time, that's about the best we can do. Best wishes.

GRMA

seanrose wrote: »

hi ladies and gentlemen

it has been a long time since I have posted on this forum.

Have had no drink in 20 days. I can go without drink for long periods of time but then overdo it when I do drink. I didnt drink paddys day or easter weekend,Its funny that them occassions I dont even think about drinking nor does it interest me.

The reason I have decided to reconnect with this forum is as I feel I have been given another oppurtunity with love. My last relationship broke down and drink had a major part in that. I am determined to not let this happen this time and if it does there is only one person to blame and that is me.

Now here is the thing. I dont feel strong enough to be able to stay away from drink but also know I havent got the ability to moderate.

I am heading over to where she is at college in 2 weeks time and I am concentrating just getting over that weekend without drink becoming an issue but also know that I cant avoid it.To be fair she knows I have a bad relationship with alcohol but I havent really done it in front of her as she is away at times. We have known each other a good while and our relationship is moving up in gears and I dont want to put this relationship in reverse gear by my drinking

Thanks for listening

Try to avod the pub, but if you can't don't be afraid to lie, or to leave early. What I did on a few occasions were I had to go to a party or something was to tell people that I was on antibiotics and couldn't drink, I made a big deal out of it, complaining to people saying I wish I could drink. After I said that I felt that the expectation for me to drink or people wondering why I wasn't was gone and I could relax a bit, plus people didnt offer me a drink or try to persuade me (the way they do when you just say you can't drink)

Good luck with it

GRMA

the big herm wrote: »

107 days, feel incredible both physically and mentally. :):)

It makes a big difference doesnt it, almost feels like a cloud you didn't know was there is lifted


Mentally I feel so much better, I used to get really down and depressed about things, when I was drunk I'd end up thinking about past fcuk ups or failures or fixate on a negative aspect of my life and just get into a massive funk. Havent got like that since I stopped drinking

Plus I feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin and just in general feel better about myself

Wattle

GRMA wrote: »

It makes a big difference doesnt it, almost feels like a cloud you didn't know was there is lifted


Mentally I feel so much better, I used to get really down and depressed about things, when I was drunk I'd end up thinking about past fcuk ups or failures or fixate on a negative aspect of my life and just get into a massive funk. Havent got like that since I stopped drinking

Plus I feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin and just in general feel better about myself

I had a lot of anger as a result of childhood abuse. I was left with a legacy of depression that alcohol just made worse. Being an active alcoholic my problems just went round and round in circles. Nearly 10 years off it now and I feel in great shape physically and mentally. Sobriety as well as regular exercise and positive thinking do the trick for me. I never thought I'd say it but its great to be alive.`

ConFurioso

Hello folks. First time here.....

8 days. Which is the longest I've gone without alcohol in about 10 years. I'm 28 now.

Saying it like that really makes me shake my head in shame. I can't believe I couldn't go a weekend with some form of alcohol. This past weekend was incredibly difficult.

A little background (apologies if I'm over sharing).

I currently live in Japan. Maybe some people associate it with a healthy lifestyle, but I suppose it's like anywhere on the planet. It's healthy if you want it to be.

They have these deals in nearly every pub here called nomihodai, or 'all you can drink'. Literally as much as you can handle for a certain time (usually 2 hours) for anything from €15-€25, depending on the place. Most Japanese people see this as a convenience.

Naturally I saw it as a challenge.

I would go out every Friday and sat here, availing of these plans. Worse, there's a bar where if you pay 40€ you can stay until they close. I once spent 8 hours there.

8 hours. That's 1/3 of a day. Half if you don't count sleeping.

On top of this, you have many other nationalities working here. Most are lovely people, but what started to irk me was the realisation that many were stereotyping me as the drunken Irish man. It pissed me off until I realised they were right.

So, I've made a decision. I just have to stop. I'm unhealthy and I'm sick of wasting my time being hungover. I'm not too hot on my job, so I realised I was spending the weekends 'playing hard' to almost help me forget my troubles (as cliché as that sounds!!).

And forget I did!!! I've never had as many blackouts as I have in Japan (2 years), and I can't believe how comfortable I got not knowing how I got home (usually on my bike which is 100% illegal here!!!). Idiot.

It's not like this is the first time I've tried, but this is the first time I've gotten past a weekend. It was a friend's bday party and about 15 of us were out at an all you can eat and all you can drink. 14 beers and one coke please! Haha! For two hours. Of course the subject came up as to why I was drinking cola....but I'm eternally grateful for my friends not pressing the matter. Reading all the posts here makes me realise how lucky I was for them to just shrug their shoulders. I hope it continues this way.

In fact, after the dinner, the birthday boy apologised to me, as he felt I got a raw deal having to pay for the all you can drink and only drinking cola. I smiled and reminded him it works out more expensive for soft drinks sometimes!

So next weekend I've booked myself in for a games afternoon with board games and computer games with other teachers here. After, there's a pub quiz and it finishes at 9. Once that's done, the hard part will begin....another friend's bday. She's Irish though and we've discussed drinking already. She's supportive.

Anyways....maybe that was too heavy! Haha!!

tl;dr 8 days and not looking back.

(Ps apologies for any typos, on a mobile)

quinrea01

I sense a lot of positivity in these posts. All have one thing in common...a strong desire to stay on the straight and narrow. I don't believe we should beat ourselves up over past behaviors and miseries, but it does no harm to now and then recall a few of our worst moments and give thanks for the fact that we no longer have to suffer the mental and physical horrors which plagued our lives in times past. Keep up the good work, folks.

I'll be 27 on Tuesday and I'll be nearly 19 months off alcohol. The last 19 months have been the best of my life SO much has changed. It wasn't easy at times and there were a few moments when I hung on by my finger nails but I got here. I literally couldn't stop drinking, it ruined everything and as much as I wanted to stop for years I couldn't do it until that point. Anyone can do it if I could as at that point I was so bloody weak minded.

MichaelHunt

126 days sober.

there was a good few years there where I was on the diesel about 3/4 nights a week, hurrying my way from one hangover to the next, from the end of one drink to the start of another.

Different times, different man.

I feel amazing mentally and physically. I've encouraged my friends to even try one month just to see if they can do it. Of course they all think I'm bonkers.
The best way I can describe it is from the film the Matrix.


"The Matrix is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work… when you go to church… when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth. … That you are a slave, Neo. Like everyone else you were born into bondage. Born into a prison that you cannot smell or taste or touch. A prison for your mind."

"You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes."


The majority of people in this country are blinded and shackled by social conformity. If I drank two/three/four litres of cola in a night people would be asking what's wrong with me? But if it's alcohol it's deemed normal. In what parallel universe is it considered normal for you consume something that makes you forget everything, act like a prick, and make you feel like HELL for hours and days? That those feelings are just something you have to suck up as part of ''the craic''.

Keep taking your blue pills lads, keep pouring that poison down your gullet, keep destroying your body and mind; meanwhile, those of us that have been unplugged are enjoying what life is really about.

quinrea01

MichaelHunt wrote: »

126 days sober.

there was a good few years there where I was on the diesel about 3/4 nights a week, hurrying my way from one hangover to the next, from the end of one drink to the start of another.

Different times, different man.

I feel amazing mentally and physically. I've encouraged my friends to even try one month just to see if they can do it. Of course they all think I'm bonkers.
The best way I can describe it is from the film the Matrix.


"The Matrix is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work… when you go to church… when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth. … That you are a slave, Neo. Like everyone else you were born into bondage. Born into a prison that you cannot smell or taste or touch. A prison for your mind."

"You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes."


The majority of people in this country are blinded and shackled by social conformity. If I drank two/three/four litres of cola in a night people would be asking what's wrong with me? But if it's alcohol it's deemed normal. In what parallel universe is it considered normal for you consume something that makes you forget everything, act like a prick, and make you feel like HELL for hours and days? That those feelings are just something you have to suck up as part of ''the craic''.

Keep taking your blue pills lads, keep pouring that poison down your gullet, keep destroying your body and mind; meanwhile, those of us that have been unplugged are enjoying what life is really about.

Now that post can only be described as BRILLIANT!!! The cola analogy describes perfectly the mindset that has existed in this country for decades. Whether 126 days sober, or 26 days or even 1 day, the days are precious. Consider being able to control absolutely what we say, what we do and where we go and not be dictated by or influenced by a poisonous substance which turns us into hurtful, raving idiots. I began my drinking career as a shy, introverted young man of about 17 or 18 who discovered that the magical elixir, alcohol turned me into the 'life of the party' as all my inhibitions and evaporated. I thought I was set for life and my popularity rocketed. This happy existence lasted for a very short time until I no longer controlled when I drank, but alcohol controlled me. The thing is, you never notice when this transition occurs. Eventually I noticed that my behaviour caused people to shun me as I became an embarrassment to them and me. Today, with almost 10 years sobriety behind me I can see others following the same road as I did and I sometimes wish I could grab them and shake the madness out of them before it is too late. I have seen many of my friends go to the grave through drink and I thank God every day that I have been spared. It's only in the last few years I can feel comfortable in pubs, at weddings etc. where drink is present. I feel good for people who can take a few drinks and leave whenever they want to...they obviously don't have a drink problem and fair play to them. But for me and many like me it is not an option. But that's ok. I have a new life today and I get up every morning with a clear head and a clear conscience. As I said in a previous post, I am no better than anyone else, but I am still alive.....and I can live with ME.

GRMA

Really struggling the past couple of days, I'm completely overwhelmed with college work and study for upcoming exams, I'm up the walls with stress. Mind is racing. I would love to just go to the pub tonight for the Man Utd game and just forget about everything for a few hours.

I know its a bad idea but I still want to I used to run away to the pub from things like this all the time but I can't do that anymore. This is the first time since I stopped drinking a few months ago that I've had some problems in my day to day life, I was coasting along, content with everything until now.

Anyone have any tips for just unwinding, relaxing and forgetting things for a few hours?

ConFurioso

I suppose it depends on your interests.

I've gone for a few runs at night lately. Very relaxing I find, since nobody is about. Bring some music with you too maybe. Even just a stroll!

Other things I've done are playing video games, or skyping mates (but that's only because I'm abroad).

This one might sound silly, but you never know....: YOUTUBE! Seriously, you can get lost on that site for a week......just look at something you like and follow the recommendations.

But if you're studying, I'd imagine looking at a screen is the last thing you need. Reading a book? Maybe watching a movie? Or make yourself a slap up dinner, like go ALL out and take the (crucial) time to make it. Then sit down and enjoy it. Maybe while watching the match at home?

Whatever you do, remember there are LOOOOOAAAAADSSSS of things to do, and you don't want to undo all your hard work! This moment will pass and you will be SO much happier when it does and you didn't drink! You can do it!

quinrea01

GRMA wrote: »

Really struggling the past couple of days, I'm completely overwhelmed with college work and study for upcoming exams, I'm up the walls with stress. Mind is racing. I would love to just go to the pub tonight for the Man Utd game and just forget about everything for a few hours.

I know its a bad idea but I still want to I used to run away to the pub from things like this all the time but I can't do that anymore. This is the first time since I stopped drinking a few months ago that I've had some problems in my day to day life, I was coasting along, content with everything until now.

Anyone have any tips for just unwinding, relaxing and forgetting things for a few hours?

Come on GRMA....you're stronger than that. There will ALWAYS be stressful times. I guarantee you that if you don't go drinking tonight you will be so proud of yourself tomorrow. I know it ain't easy, but stand firm. Watch the match at home with a nice meal, get to bed early and maybe read a book. Another good tip in stressful times is deep-breathing exercises. For about 15 minutes go into a room on your own and sit down. Slowly take a deep breath through your nose, hold it for about 5 seconds and slowly release it through your mouth. Wait about 10 seconds and repeat the exercise. About 10 to 15 minutes of this and you will feel relaxed and clear-headed. Also consider that if you do go on the lash tonight you will still have the same stress tomorrow, only this time it will be magnified much worse. It will be a fantastic victory for you if you do the right thing tonight. It's all up to you. Best wishes.

hubba

Yeah, to me it's critical to learn how to deal with these stress peaks. I think my poor coping abilities in the past contributed to my reaching to alcohol to make the tension 'go away' but that just led to me getting more and more anxious in my daily life (yes, it's fact - long term use of alcohol leads to an increase in anxiety levels).

So deep breathing, learning how to 'shift' moods by getting to know yourself and developing antidotes to your triggers. And to some extent learning how to face the fear/anger or whatever is negative in you and causing you stress and accepting it, not fighting it. It is there, it will pass, you will not die.

Sounds simple but in a weird way we 'get off' on heightened negative emotion, it feeds our ego and can make us feel strong (temporarily) so we need to be wary of indulging as it is really not useful in the long term.

Take care all.

Ed The Equalizer

I second the running... if you're not a runner the Couch to 5k program is a great place to start.

And the breathing/meditation/mindfulness - all good ways to de-stress.

But really the thing that I'd focus on is that no matter what happens your exam results are going to be better than if you were drinking. And even if you don't get it completely right this time, just stay off the booze and life gets better and better.

I'm nearly 4 years off it and only really beginning to get fully productive now. I've started using a free online programme called Simpleology, it trains you day by day to get more stuff done, really made a massive difference in my life. Training takes about 20 minutes a day but then it turns your to-do list into like a gameplay situation. I would have loved it back in the college days - horrible memories of deferring exams, doing the bare minimum amount of work, and scraping through by the skin of my teeth.

GRMA

Thanks guys, just ditched the study, took a break and pigged out on a take away lol... glad I didn't go to the pub. I just kept myself doing something, even just reading random stuff on the internet.


Couch to 5 k is something I plan to do this summer

Corvo

10 days since I touched a drop.

Starting to get the itch now though. Work have a social outing Friday night which I'm finding it hard to refuse. Had a half day booked that day to really have a good drink before meeting up but have decided to work the full day to use up a few more hours.

I'm going through books like I would pints

quinrea01

Sounds like you might be almost ready to join us in the REAL world. You could do worse.....much worse. Give it a try.

Corvo

Griffin1988 wrote: »

10 days since I touched a drop.

Starting to get the itch now though. Work have a social outing Friday night which I'm finding it hard to refuse. Had a half day booked that day to really have a good drink before meeting up but have decided to work the full day to use up a few more hours.

I'm going through books like I would pints

Well today has arrived and I'm finding it impossible to think about anything but going out.

As I said in the above post, a few of us were due to take a half day, go for lunch and a few pints. I didn't take the half day but went for lunch and they had pints with theirs. Jesus that nearly drove me crazy.

Now they are all heading down to the pub to meet up.



This is tougher than I thought!

Sunnyisland

Go out for a walk, you need to keep occupied for your witching hour, and it will pass.

iusedtoknow

I just realised that I have passed the year mark without booze.

In the last year, I've undergone so many changes personally (moved countries) and professionally (promotion) it is unreal. It hasn't been without problems, but i know that it is all up to me to sort out any problems, and not rely on booze or avoid things by going to the bar.

I still socialize in bars, just don't don't drink. The funniest thing that came of it - i was driving some workmates back home after a work event. No one was super pissed, but there was a definite smell of beer breath. We were stopped by the police at a road stop (pretty normal around here). It was a great feeling to pass the breathelizer and alphabet test with flying colours and the cop calling me "a good guy".

It is also great that tomorrow I have a 10 mile bike ride planned and am off kayaking on sunday - after both I will probably eat my bodyweight in BBQ but will at least be clearheaded.

GRMA

Griffin1988 wrote: »

Well today has arrived and I'm finding it impossible to think about anything but going out.

As I said in the above post, a few of us were due to take a half day, go for lunch and a few pints. I didn't take the half day but went for lunch and they had pints with theirs. Jesus that nearly drove me crazy.

Now they are all heading down to the pub to meet up.



This is tougher than I thought!

As you can see I was in the same place a few days ago but I got through it and feel all the better for it. It feels quite rewarding afterwards too

Corvo

GRMA wrote: »

As you can see I was in the same place a few days ago but I got through it and feel all the better for it. It feels quite rewarding afterwards too

I popped down to it after and a couple of them were well on at this stage. Had a Becks non-alcoholic and I got the usual stuff like "Oh you are so boring, I suppose you won't smoke a fag either" and "You would swear a few beers would kill you" (from people I really expected wouldn't be like that)

In the end I left after half and hour, got three DVD's and went home.

Have a few things to do today to keep me occupied so that won't be too bad.

GRMA

Griffin1988 wrote: »

I popped down to it after and a couple of them were well on at this stage. Had a Becks non-alcoholic and I got the usual stuff like "Oh you are so boring, I suppose you won't smoke a fag either" and "You would swear a few beers would kill you" (from people I really expected wouldn't be like that)

In the end I left after half and hour, got three DVD's and went home.

Have a few things to do today to keep me occupied so that won't be too bad.

Some of my "friends" were dicks like that too. I think it may be because it makes them question their own drinking and they dont want to confront that so they just slag you off.

quinrea01

GRMA wrote: »

Some of my "friends" were dicks like that too. I think it may be because it makes them question their own drinking and they dont want to confront that so they just slag you off.

Bang on the money, GRMA. Nothing worries hard drinkers more than seeing a 'mate' getting their act together. They feel threatened by the non-drinker as they are forced to look at their own drinking habits. When I was at my worst I resented anyone from our little band of hardened boozers getting sober. I freely admit that I character- assassinated these people and spoke of them as traitors, turncoats and worse. Of course, secretly I admired them and wished I had the cojones to do the same. No doubt Karma came around when I left the Dark Side, and I can only imagine what was said about me when I found the guts to get myself out of Drink Hell. Don't worry a damn about what people think or say about you. You are a WINNER......nothing more to be said.