TELL US A LIMERICK

Wowbagger

There once was a man from Havana
Screwed a girl on a player piano
At the height of their fever
Her ass hit the lever
And Yes he has no banana...

gozunda

The OP said tell us a Limerick
That would be indeed fantastic
For opinion and views
And all kind of ol' news
Boards has it all even rhythmic

Wowbagger

First original one. Congrats.

filbert the fox

A Limerick was set as one's task,
with Boards to act as a mask,
inevitably crude
often quite rude
and humour - a bit much to ask?

gozunda

Not quite a 'true' Limerick but I thought I'd put it here for posterity.

The fly flew down the flue
He flew it straight and true
But once a fire was lit he fled
The flames were quicker than the fly
as he flew up the flue  - fly now is dead


one of my own - I found though there are some similar ones ...

This one by Ogden Nash

A Flea And A Fly In A Flue

A flea and a fly in a flue 
Were imprisoned, so what could they do? 
Said the fly, "let us flee!" 
"Let us fly!" said the flea. 
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

Wowbagger

And now for Christmas!

Well I only got a sweater for Christmas
Not the best thing to get for a dreamer
Because I got a sweater for Christmas
When I wanted a moaner or a screamer

filbert the fox

Wowbagger wrote: »

And now for Christmas!

Well I only got a sweater for Christmas
Not the best thing to get for a dreamer
Because I got a sweater for Christmas
When I wanted a moaner or a screamer

As the Good Doctor would say

It's not a Limerick! Doesn't comply with the rules. you must have five lines in the AABBA format....

Wowbagger

I stand corrected!

This year I asked Santa for a Harley
And a flagon of wine made of barley.
Then I asked God alone
For an angel of my own...
No, not one of His, one of Charlie's!

snailsong

A soldier from County Kildare,
Was making love in a chair.
At the fifty third stroke,
The furniture broke,
And his rifle went off in the air.

namenotavailablE

An old man they all called 'Old Charlie'
Had an organ all wrinkled and gnarly.
A girl once asked him
If he'd like her to stim-
-ulate it and sow wild oats and barley.

Persiancowboy

There was a young whore from Leicester
Who said to the man who undressed her
If you want a good grind
you have to come in from behind
As me front is beginning to fester......

Count Down

A virgin to the day I die
Said Mary to I.
But before she met her maker,
She ordered from her undertaker
A coffin in the shape of a Y.