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Michael Jackson Humour [Merged]

Run_to_da_hills · 2009-06-26 06:59:42

June 25, 2009 – Michael Jackson, one of the most widely beloved entertainers and profoundly influential artists of all-time, leaves an indelible imprint on popular music and culture. RIP. We must also remember that he put his foot in it....... Here we go. :D Q: How did Michael Jackson pick his nose? A: From a catalogue. Q:…

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26-06-2009 7:59am

#1

Run_to_da_hills

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June 25, 2009 – Michael Jackson, one of the most widely beloved entertainers and profoundly influential artists of all-time, leaves an indelible imprint on popular music and culture. RIP.

We must also remember that he put his foot in it.......

Here we go.

Q: How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A: From a catalogue.

Q: What was the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One was white, made out of plastic, and dangerous for kids to play with and the other you carry your groceries in.

Q: Why did Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them.

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#2 26-06-2009 8:08am
JimmyFloyd

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<snip> A little too far - Hagar <snip>

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#3 26-06-2009 8:22am
beertons

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He passed away this morning. Authorities have released a statement saying that they will melt his body down and make plastic toys so kids can play with him for a change!

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#4 26-06-2009 8:23am
Penn

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When Michael Jackson grabbed is chest and went "Ow!", did anyone notice?

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#5 26-06-2009 8:26am
tishie yunk

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That's in very bad taste, have a bit of respect. It’s the children I feel sorry for, not only do they lose their private zoo and amusement park now this, poor little blanket and prince michael all they’ll have to remember him is that rabies infested monkey. A true tragedy. Do you actually think he is really dead, or just taking a break like Elvis. Either way if he can change skin colour, resurrecting himself from the dead shouldn’t be a challenge.

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#6 26-06-2009 8:28am
JimmyFloyd

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http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055603929

His lawyer is on GMTV now and said "I knew after all his drug abuse he'd one day wake up dead"

Idiot

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#7 26-06-2009 8:33am
tfitzgerald

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how do they know when its bedtime in jacksons house

when the big hand reaches for the little hand

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#8 26-06-2009 8:33am
JimmyFloyd

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tishie yunk wrote: »

That's in very bad taste, have a bit of respect. It’s the children I feel sorry for, not only do they lose their private zoo and amusement park now this, poor little blanket and prince michael all they’ll have to remember him is that rabies infested monkey. A true tragedy. Do you actually think he is really dead, or just taking a break like Elvis. Either way if he can change skin colour, resurrecting himself from the dead shouldn’t be a challenge.

http://www.ismichaeljacksonalive.com

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#9 26-06-2009 8:38am
bandybanter

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Doesn't matter if your black or white or blue:eek:. No, wait...

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#10 26-06-2009 8:44am
Penn

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and Man United?

United will still have Giggs this year

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#11 26-06-2009 8:48am
WindSock

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All his upcoming dates are now cancelled, including John and Ryan aged 5 & 9.

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#12 26-06-2009 8:50am
Penn

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People have been waiting outside the hospital where Michael Jackson died. Not to pay their respects, but to see if anyones going to dangle the body out a window

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#13 26-06-2009 8:51am
Mahatma coat

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my favourite MJ Joke

Knock Knock

Who's there

Little boy Blue

Little boy blue WHO?

Micheal Jackson
:D:D:D:D

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#14 26-06-2009 8:55am
wclarke20

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Police have drawn up some suspects. They're not sure who to blame it on. Will it be the sunshine?. the moonlight?, the good times? or their number one suspect, ....the boogie

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#15 26-06-2009 8:58am
Hagar

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Threads merged.

Remember folks this the Humour Forum, general viewing, don't go too far.

Thanks

Hagar

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#16 26-06-2009 9:30am
flanzer

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Authorities have now said that Michael Jackson didn't have a heart but was found in the childrens ward having a STROKE!

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#17 26-06-2009 9:33am
dats_right

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*****BREAKING NEWS******
Reports of Michael Jackson having a heart attack are incorrect. He was found in the Children's Ward having a stroke!
________________________________________________________________

Michael Jackson's upcoming dates have now been cancelled. They were James (aged 8) and Thomas (aged 10).

_________________________________________________________________

Ktel the makers of Barbie dolls have made an offer to buy Jacko's corpse, they want to melt it down and make plastic dolls out of it so that little kids can play with him for a change.
_________________________________________________________________

R I P easy as 1 2 3

________________________________________________________________

What's the difference between Alex Ferguson and Jacko? Fergie will still be playing Giggs next August!!

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#18 26-06-2009 9:35am
dats_right

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Q: Did you hear Micheal Jackson was found dead?
A: He got food poisoning from an 11 year old wiener.

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#19 26-06-2009 9:40am
delbertgrady

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What's the difference between Disney films and Michael Jackson?
Disney films can still touch kids.

2024 Gigs and Events: David Suchet, Depeche Mode, Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark, The Smile, Pixies, Liam Gallagher John Squire/Jake Bugg, Kacey Musgraves (x2), Olivia Rodrigo, Mitski, Muireann Bradley, Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band, Eric Clapton, Girls Aloud, Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band, The Smashing Pumpkins/Weezer, P!nk, Pearl Jam/Richard Ashcroft, Taylor Swift/Paramore, Suede/Manic Street Preachers, Muireann Bradley, The Bothy Band, AC/DC, Deacon Blue/Altered Images, The The, blink-182, Coldplay, Gilbert O'Sullivan, Nick Lowe, Public Service Broadcasting, Crash Test Dummies.

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#20 26-06-2009 9:41am
dak

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dats_right wrote: »

Q: Did you hear Micheal Jackson was found dead?
A: He got food poisoning from an 11 year old wiener.

Beat it ! I'm Bad !!!!

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#21 26-06-2009 9:44am
Sleipnir

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He's not dead, he's just a bit off-colour.

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#22 26-06-2009 9:48am
drunk_monk

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I wonder if they have started the funeral arrangements yet?, Well they'd wanna be starting something...............

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#23 26-06-2009 9:49am
dats_right

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Unconfirmed reports now suggest that Jacko's cardiac arrest was caused when he tripped over a pram. The doctors and his family have asked fans not to blame it on the buggy!!

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#24 26-06-2009 9:50am
JimmyFloyd

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He didnt die of a heart attack

He chocked on some 7 year old nuts!

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#25 26-06-2009 10:13am
C0SM0

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Michael Jackson has been banned from heaven, it's not been blamed on the sunshine, not on the moonlight or the good times, it's been blamed on the buggery!!!

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#26 26-06-2009 10:15am
flanzer

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Robbed from AH......

Early autopsy reports indicate that the heart disease came from his protestant fathers side of the family - its known as the "billy gene"

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#27 26-06-2009 10:44am
steppen

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#28 26-06-2009 10:53am
tosh_thedude

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When Farrah Fawcett arrived in heaven god granted her one wish. She wished for all of the children to be safe. So God killed Michael Jackson.

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#29 26-06-2009 11:01am
wclarke20

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Mourners have been enquiring about the dress code for the funeral. Apparently it doesnt matter if its black or white

:D:D

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#30 26-06-2009 11:12am
trustno1

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Michael Jackson't last request was to be cremated and for his ashes to be put in an etch-a-sketch so kids could still play with him...

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#31 26-06-2009 11:14am
paulcorr

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the paramedic who gave him the kiss of life kept michael jacksons lips he is going to start a tribute act called MEDICAL JACKSON his first release will be BAND AID

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