Why don't men approach women?

97i9y3941

im facially challenged, along with not having a fat wallet or a full mop of hair!

scanlas

How friendly are you to all the charity workers on the street stopping you?

It's similar. They have a similar approach and you know the reason they are being frienldy to you is becasue they want something from you. So you try not to make eye contact and keep walking or say you're busy. Are you a stuck up bitch as well? No, it's not practical to stop and talk to every charity worker on the street. You have nothing against them personally but the situation requires you to be a bit rude by walking by avoiding eye contact or walking around them or saying no thanks.

johnathan woss

BumbleB wrote: »

Its funny, Irish girls will gyrate right in front of you ,rub off you ,stroke themselves ,push their boobs together while youre watching but wont say anything , weird !.

haha that is so true.

One time I was standing at the bar waiting to served. A girl very obviously backed into me and started rubbing her ass against my crotch.

I tried to start a conversation with her and she gave me a "why the hell are you talking to me" look.

Could any girls explain that one to me ? :pac:

NickNolte

scanlas wrote: »

How friendly are you to all the charity workers on the street stopping you?

It's similar. They have a similar approach and you know the reason they are being frienldy to you is becasue they want something from you. So you try not to make eye contact and keep walking or say you're busy. Are you a stuck up bitch as well? No, it's not practical to stop and talk to every charity worker on the street. You have nothing against them personally but the situation requires you to be a bit rude by walking by avoiding eye contact or walking around them or saying no thanks.

Yeah, I agree. It's why I never chatted up Irish women when I was single. It's why very few of my single mate chat Irish women up now. We don't want to bother you like a bunch of annoying chuggers 'who want something'. It's that very attitude that Irish women give off. You're absolutely right. The answer to the OP's question right there.

Eve_Dublin

Bitter bitter bitter bitter.

scanlas

You don't have to offer nothing though. You can express your personality and have fun chatting with the girl not caring what she thinks. Everyone likes fun.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Bitter bitter bitter bitter.

Not at all. As I said, I just think a large percentage of Irish women have shítty attitudes. It's not because I'm bitter (I'm a lot happier with my non-Irish girlfriend than I ever was with any Irish girl)... it's just something I see with my own eyes.

Denial denial denial denial. Not just a river in Egypt.

Eve_Dublin

Man, you're coming off really, really bitter. Like you've been fecked over by a few Irish women and now you're claiming a large percentage are b****s. What percentage are we talking here, Nick?? 10? 20? 30? Let's say 10 percent...you're claiming to have met and been fecked over by 10% of the Irish female population....that says more about you than them. If it was more than 10...it's even more unbelievable. Give me an approx percentage here.

Are claiming that I'm in denial about how b***y Irish women are??? Ehhhh....

I'm not denying a percentage of the Irish female population is b***y but most definitely not a large percentage. I wouldn't claim such a thing as I've only met a very, very, very small portion of Irish women in my lifetime.

I've mainly gone with men foreign men and the last Irish guy I went out with broke my heart. He was a bit of a twat as it transpired but would I turn around and claim most Irish men are twats?? How ridiculous.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Man, you're coming off really, really bitter.

Nah, not really. You're just making assumptions about me (see below) and refuse to accept the fact that this is something I'm seeing. I'm speaking from the head and, to a good degree, casual observation... not the heart.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Like you've been fecked over by a few Irish women

Funnily enough I haven't. I've seen a lot of men, a fair few mates included, being treated very badly on nights out. That's all really.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

and now you're claiming a large percentage are b****s. What percentage are we talking here, Nick?? 10? 20? 30?

No idea. A very, very noticeable number. More so than in any other country I've been to. Even in South California, women are more approachable than in Dublin. Which really is saying something considering the status seeking, social climbing, money-obsessed culture they've got going on over there.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Let's say 10 percent...you're claiming to have met and been fecked over by 10% of the Irish female population....that says more about you than them.

Like I said, I haven't. I've largely been in relationships since my late teens so I haven't had the opportunity. Thankfully!

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

If it was more than 10...it's even more unbelievable. Give me an approx percentage here.

Who knows. I haven't been taking notes.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Are claiming that I'm in denial about how b***y Irish women are??? Ehhhh....

Yes. And materialistic. And unapproachable. And cliquey.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

I'm not denying a percentage of the Irish female population is b***y but most definitely not a large percentage.

Well maybe you can give me an accurate percentage then.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

I wouldn't claim such a thing as I've only met a very, very, very small portion of Irish women in my lifetime.

You're right of course. I can only give my opinion based on my own experience and observations.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

I've mainly gone with men foreign men and the last Irish guy I went out with broke my heart. He was a bit of a twat as it transpired but would I turn around and claim most Irish men are twats?? How ridiculous.

You had your heart broken by a guy and then decided he was a twat? Telling.

MIN2511

So last night a friend and i went to a bar/pub/nightclub and very few lads approached us!
We were dressed well, we got loads of compliments from women, the lads at the door, barman-so it's not like we were dressed trashy/trampy.

We knew the lads were into us but none of them came to talk to us until the end of the night... Like the 3 o 'clock need to score, any chick will do kinda thing...

Anyways, i go out to have fun. If i meet a nice lad nice and if i don't no worries


I think men should stop assuming all women want relationships and marriage. Some people do(and bless them for that) but they shouldn't be judged for what they want. There is nothing wrong with wanting a man to settle down, if you are not interested-say it and move on!

Eve_Dublin

NickNolte wrote: »

Nah, not really. You're just making assumptions about me (see below) and refuse to accept the fact that this is something I'm seeing. I'm speaking from the head and, to a good degree, casual observation... not the heart.

You're making assumptions about a large percentage of Irish women. From where I'm standing, you come across as bitter....just a casual observation.

Funnily enough I haven't. I've seen a lot of men, a fair few mates included, being treated very badly on nights out. That's all really.

Grand. Personal experiences.

No idea. A very, very noticeable number. More so than in any other country I've been to. Even in South California, women are more approachable than in Dublin. Which really is saying something considering the status seeking, social climbing, money-obsessed culture they've got going on over there.

Yep, no B****s in California. Everybody knows that!

Like I said, I haven't. I've largely been in relationships since my late teens so I haven't had the opportunity. Thankfully!

But you said you're happier with your foreign girlfriend than you ever were with an Irish girl? So really you probably haven't chatted up an Irish woman in a long time...you also mentioned you weren't one for chatting up...what are you basing your experiences on? Just your friends?? Surely only a man who has a hell of a lot of experience chatting up women can really come to this conclusion. My God, if I based my opinions of Irish men on my friend's experiences, i'd be as bitter as you.

Who knows. I haven't been taking notes.

Right then stop bandying around those kinds of claims if you can't back it up.

Yes. And materialistic. And unapproachable. And cliquey.

Jesus. Bitter.


Well maybe you can give me an accurate percentage then.

I asked for an approx percentage. Instead of a percentage, I'll give you an approx number that i've come across in my lifetime....maybe 10? They were mainly the horrible girls at school. As an adult, maybe 3.

You're right of course. I can only give my opinion based on my own experience and observations.

Right. You should really follow your claims with "in my experience". You speak like your opinions are the gospel.

You had your heart broken by a guy and then decided he was a twat? Telling.

Telling of what??? What are you implying?? Haha! Are you implying I'm a b***h because I had a broken heart???? Wow, no chance that it could've been his fault then, no? That's more telling in my opinion. If you need to know, he was a twat because he was ferociously jealous and controlling, even of me talking to close female friends so I finished it. Twat.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Telling of what??? What are you implying?? Haha! Are you implying I'm a b***h because I had a broken heart????

For a start, I wouldn't suggest you're a bitch at all. I can only assume that the reason you're defending the existence of a notable increase in the narcissism and bitchyness of Irish women in the last decade or so is because you're not like that and you because you haven't seen the things that I have. From a male perspective and the perspective of a guy who has a few single, increasingly frustrated yet genuinely decent mates who are wondering why they're regularly treated like crap.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Wow, no chance that it could've been his fault then, no? That's more telling in my opinion. If you need to know, he was a twat because he was ferociously jealous and controlling, even of me talking to close female friends so I finished it. Twat.

Your heart was broken because you broke up with a jealous, controlling loser? Fair enough. Love works in mysterious ways.

RealEstateKing

Of course we are all schooled to know that generalisations are a bad thing and so on. But the very existence of a generalisation oifte points to some essential truth.

In many countries in the world there is a codified 'language' of picking-up and hooking up that exists between men and women. A whole series of nudges and winks that everybody knows are the way to indicate to each other that you're attracted, without you having to actually blurt it out. You grow up in the context, you do this, then the woman does that, and Voila! you're hooking up.

Ireland never had this culture. Ireland was until recently a Catholic and peasant culture, where at 18 you went to the local dance, got hammered and married the first girl you fell on and stayed together until you both died.

In the past 15 or so years we have cobbled together a version of the Language of Dating that exists in other countries, mostly taken from American T.V. and movies.

But we still don't speak the language properly yet, it is still at a pidgin stage. Irish girls and guys still have to mashed out of it to get anything going on, the guys are doing a poor impression of Enrique Eglesias and the girls are straining so hard to be Paris Hilton their foundation make-up is cracking at the edges.

Thus in the minds of some Irish girls telling a guy to "**** off out of it." consistutes being a sassy modern woman, and for many Irish guys getting smashed and blurting out "D'ya fancy a ride love?" constitutes a direct Aplha-Male approach that cuts to the chase.

We need time to develop a cultural code that works the way more advanced countries do. But, we BOTH have to do it, both Men and Women, not just one of us. Takes two to tango.

Eve_Dublin

NickNolte wrote: »

For a start, I wouldn't suggest you're a bitch at all. I can only assume that the reason you're defending the existence of a notable increase in the narcissism and bitchyness of Irish women in the last decade or so is because you're not like that and you because you haven't seen the things that I have. From a male perspective and the perspective of a guy who has a few single, increasingly frustrated yet genuinely decent mates who are wondering why they're regularly treated like crap.



Your heart was broken because you broke up with a jealous, controlling loser? Fair enough. Love works in mysterious ways.

And this is of relevence to your arguement how? I'm really getting the impression you're implying something more here man...spit it out.

But if you're curious, love is blind and I loved him...didn't realise how bad things were 'till it was pointed out to me by my friends (sometimes the obvious is not always apparent as I'm sure you know)...I broke up with him but I was still absolutely devastated. The whole thing was very hard, particularly because I didn't pick up on it myself. Love can make you really, really dumb sometimes but this is a seperate debate.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

And this is of relevence to your arguement how? I'm really getting the impression you're implying something more here man...spit it out.

But if you're curious, love is blind and I loved him...didn't realise how bad things were 'till it was pointed out to me by my friends (sometimes the obvious is not always apparent as I'm sure you know)...I broke up with him but I was still absolutely devastated. The whole thing was very hard, particularly because I didn't pick up on it myself. Love can make you really, really dumb sometimes but this is a seperate debate.

Fair enough. It's none of my business. I've been there myself. It's not my place to pry and it's off-topic anyway.

Eve_Dublin

NickNolte wrote: »

For a start, I wouldn't suggest you're a bitch at all. I can only assume that the reason you're defending the existence of a notable increase in the narcissism and bitchyness of Irish women in the last decade or so is because you're not like that and you because you haven't seen the things that I have. From a male perspective and the perspective of a guy who has a few single, increasingly frustrated yet genuinely decent mates who are wondering why they're regularly treated like crap.

And that's fair enough, I can't argue with that but I'm certainly not defending an increase in narcissism (this is a new accusation...I think the rise in this particular trait is a global phenomenon, actually) and bitchiness in Irish women, my whole point is I don't see it as much as everyone claims. Actually the reason why I originally posted on here was not to deny the existance of stupid cows in Ireland but to defend myself and other Irish women against the couple of posters who came in here and declared that ALL Irish women were b****s without exception. How am I NOT expected to defend that? I'm surprised more Irish women haven't come on here to defend themselves to be honest. This debate is also over on After Hours. The vitriolic abuse of myself (because by chance I was born in this country) and other women is unreal. Smacks of misogyny...there's no other word for it.

Aand do you not believe that modern society as a whole, both male and female, are becoming more and more up their own ar*ses? I would include myself in this as I've got a Facebook page dedicated to me and me having a great time with all my fun pals. Modern life is rubbish, as Damon Albarn once said.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

posters who came in here and declared that ALL Irish women were b****s without exception.

I wouldn't suggest that. Some of my best friends are Irish women. I was talking about a reasonably un-noticeable minority that turned into something of an epidemic over the course of the Celtic Tiger. Even if it's still a minority, it's still disappointing for, what is traditionally, a fairly humble country.

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Aand do you not believe that modern society as a whole, both male and female, are becoming more and more up their own ar*ses?

I do actually, yeah.

Eve_Dublin

RealEstateKing wrote: »

Of course we are all schooled to know that generalisations are a bad thing and so on. But the very existence of a generalisation oifte points to some essential truth.

In many countries in the world there is a codified 'language' of picking-up and hooking up that exists between men and women. A whole series of nudges and winks that everybody knows are the way to indicate to each other that you're attracted, without you having to actually blurt it out. You grow up in the context, you do this, then the woman does that, and Voila! you're hooking up.

Ireland never had this culture. Ireland was until recently a Catholic and peasant culture, where at 18 you went to the local dance, got hammered and married the first girl you fell on and stayed together until you both died.

In the past 15 or so years we have cobbled together a version of the Language of Dating that exists in other countries, mostly taken from American T.V. and movies.

But we still don't speak the language properly yet, it is still at a pidgin stage. Irish girls and guys still have to mashed out of it to get anything going on, the guys are doing a poor impression of Enrique Eglesias and the girls are straining so hard to be Paris Hilton their foundation make-up is cracking at the edges.

Thus in the minds of some Irish girls telling a guy to "**** off out of it." consistutes being a sassy modern woman, and for many Irish guys getting smashed and blurting out "D'ya fancy a ride love?" constitutes a direct Aplha-Male approach that cuts to the chase.

We need time to develop a cultural code that works the way more advanced countries do. But, we BOTH have to do it, both Men and Women, not just one of us. Takes two to tango.

An interesting point-of-view, King. I think a mature approach to all this would be trying to understand WHY things are the way they are instead of insulting a large proportion of the females in Ireland...why are the handful of b***y girls in Ireland acting this way? Why do they feel this approach could possibly work for them? It makes sense that these girls are getting their rules of dating from Heat magazine or MTV. It all smacks of copy-cat, insincere behaviour and is all a bit sad.

Why do some of the males in Ireland have to get baloobas before they can talk to a girl? It can't be that Irish females have different genetic make-up to other nationalities...it's obviously a cultural thing, nuture v nature and if other Irish men can't understand them and visa-versa, what hope do we have? I really don't think putting eachother down will get us anywhere. I know some fellas are happy-put with their foreign girlfriends but you're still going to have to co-exist in this country with a supposed *large percentage" of people you essentially hate. Maybe a bit more understanding is worth a shot in that case.

RealEstateKing

they don't mean ALL, its just a figure of speech. I dont think its necessary for you to defend Irish women from that accusation. Of course it's not ALL.

But it is a significant amount. And its significant enough for many Irish guys, myself included, to err on the side of foreign when out on the pull.

Simply in terms of a numbers game, I find it far more likely that Im going to meet an intelligent, interesting, good-looking, reasonably polite sexy woman who's foreign than one who is from my own country. Doesnt mean Ill reject an Irish one when she comes along , but purely for my own sanity I go the other way. Many of my male friends are the same way.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Why do some of the males in Ireland have to get baloobas before they can talk to a girl?

They know there's a pretty good chance they'll get knocked back. Cruelly or otherwise. I'd imagine it's probably easier if you're pissed.

Eve_Dublin

RealEstateKing wrote: »

they don't mean ALL, its just a figure of speech. I dont think its necessary for you to defend Irish women from that accusation. Of course it's not ALL.

But it is a significant amount. And its significant enough for many Irish guys, myself included, to err on the side of foreign when out on the pull.

Simply in terms of a numbers game, I find it far more likely that Im going to meet an intelligent, interesting, good-looking, reasonably polite sexy woman who's foreign than one who is from my own country. Doesnt mean Ill reject an Irish one when she comes along , but purely for my own sanity I go the other way. Many of my male friends are the same way.

Take a look at After Hours and find the debates about Irish women and tell me would you not be offended if the same conversation was taking place about Irish men to the same extent. Of course they don't mean all but they no doubt mean a majority. The lads who make these types of comments are not worth wasting energy on, actually but I was still riled up. I won't be bullied on a forum that I've enjoyed reading for the past few years.

Fair enough, that's a matter of taste. I would agree with you on that one when it comes to foreign men. I personally find Spanish men a lot better looking and sexier than the average Irish man. More interesting because they're different from myself and alot of the time, more open-minded and intelligence...well that just depends on the person. Can you generalise and call another nationality more intelligent than another? No.

Eve_Dublin

Right, I'm signing off from this debate. Everyone is entitled to their opinion; you know mine at this stage but we're just going round in circles now. Good luck with it all anyway.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Take a look at After Hours and find the debates about Irish women and tell me would you not be offended if the same conversation was taking place about Irish men to the same extent. Of course they don't mean all but they no doubt mean a majority. The lads who make these types of comments are not worth wasting energy on, actually but I was still riled up. I won't be bullied on a forum that I've enjoyed reading for the past few years.

Fair enough, that's a matter of taste. I would agree with you on that one when it comes to foreign men. I personally find Spanish men a lot better looking and sexier than the average Irish man. More interesting because they're different from myself and alot of the time, more open-minded and intelligence...well that just depends on the person. Can you generalise and call another nationality more intelligent than another? No.

Truth hurts. I feel sorry for nice girls like you who a large and increasing number of horrible Irish women have spoiled it for. That's life. You gotta suck it up.

Eve_Dublin

Right, definitely signing off after this comment.Haha! No, no one has spoiled it for me. I still get chatted up. No problems. All good. Thanks for you're concern anyway.

NickNolte

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Right, definitely signing off after this comment.Haha! No, no one has spoiled it for me. I still get chatted up. No problems. All good. Thanks for you're concern anyway.

You're welcome. A bit of advice - you want to get chatted up by non-controlling, jealous idiot types... chat men up on your own initiative. It doesn't matter how often you get chatted up. Quality, not quantity. I'm sure you know that by now anyway.

RealEstateKing

Take a look at After Hours and find the debates about Irish women and tell me would you not be offended if the same conversation was taking place about Irish men to the same extent.

I agree, I think Irish men are equally crap! And I include myself in that. That was my arguement - that its not Mens or Womens fault, but the language that we speak to each other in.

In Ireland dating is a little bit 'Broken', I dont think this is Irish women's fault any more than Irish Men's.

NickNolte

RealEstateKing wrote: »

In Ireland dating is a little bit 'Broken', I dont think this is Irish women's fault any more than Irish Men's.

I disagree. I believe it became irreversibly fractured when this country expericed an influx of pseudo-wealth and Irish women decided to import social behaviours and life expectations wholesale from certain parts of America based on the fantasies they've been watching on telly. Sorry :eek:

97i9y3941

@nick-do you mean the gorgeous women that married the builders during the boom lol

Eve_Dublin

Not interested in being chatted up at the moment. Not single. Yeah, I agree, if you read back on what I wrote today, I spoke of how women SHOULD do the chatting up more and not see a club as a Victorian debutante ball. Abso-fecking-lutely. And you can never tell if someone is a controllling, jealous twat from from the initial conversation and I learnt that the hard way. And I was the one who approached him. He was a charming fecker. Maybe they're the ones to watch.

If i'm single in the future, maybe I should go for the rude, obnoxious men instead...you can't judge someone's whole personality on a two minute conversation. That would be silly.

I'm like a dog at a bone with this arguement....can seem to tear myself away...think I've developed my own PI.

NickNolte

Fred83 wrote: »

@nick-do you mean the gorgeous women that married the builders during the boom lol

Sometimes an arse that hangs around your ankles won't get you married. Even if you have a healthy bank balance.