what are you chat up lines??

The Master

"Do you like fruit?"

"Yeah, Well suck my cock it's a peach"

Lilyblue

The Master wrote: »

"Do you like fruit?"

"Yeah, Well suck my cock it's a peach"

:pac:

Aidric

Are you alright Sharon?

Purple Gorilla

Can I have your phone number?
I lost mine

If you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?

If you are what you eat, I could be you by morning

Nice dress! Can I talk you out of it?

Do you know what a man with a 12 inch dick has for breakfast? No! Well I have Bacon and Eggs

Nice legs... What time do they open?

stepbar

Would you like a drink?

That seems to work......

JangoFett

Lilyblue wrote: »

I'm no Wilma Flintstone but I can make your bedrock

All the lads love that one...well helps that I am gorgeous

Modest too?

stepbar

My god :eek: Girls use chat up lines.... who'd have thought Add that into the part of the brain that is conditioned to think girls don't poo and fart either Well holy god as Miley used to say.

monkeyfudge

Is heaven missing an angel? 'Cause you've got nice cans!

Simply Red

"Did you know that theres 206 bones in the female body?"
"Really?"
"Yep, would you like 1 more?"

fatherbuzcagney

man' do you like my magic watch'
girl ' how is it magic'
man 'it tells me that u have no nickers on, oh sorry its an hour fast'

Capt'n Midnight

Nice shoes, Wanna Fúck ?

inode

Guy: Did you bring your helmet
Girl: No
Guy: Well you'd better go get it because your going through the headboard tonight!

fatherbuzcagney

'grab ur jacket u have clicked'

Gavin "shels"

Can't beat the

"How much a polar bear weigh?"

"Dunno"

"Enough to break the ice"



:cool:

seanybiker

you'll do.

Would you like some sweets?

tiger325

haha the best is to smile and give a wink

Jesus Wept

connundrum wrote: »

Do girls use chat up lines?

i.e.

Hi, I work for Subway, wanna show me your footlong?

She works for Subway, therefore should be showing you her footlong.

Lilyblue wrote: »

I'm no Wilma Flintstone but I can make your bedrock

All the lads love that one...well helps that I am gorgeous

...well helps that you have a pulse.

seanybiker

Lilyblue wrote: »

well helps that I am gorgeous

Oh christ. Are you blonde and orange by any chance? All them nutters love themselves .

Dboy85

Lilyblue wrote: »

All the lads love that one...well helps that I am gorgeous

...Or she does sweat much for a fat bird haha:pac:

tman

tman wrote: »

Most likely because you totally fluffed it up;)
Should be "fancy going halves on a bastard?"

Damn, you're right! No wonder that never worked before:o

johnny_knoxvile

You ask a girl "would you sleep with Brad Pitt for ?500?"

to which she replies "of course i would"

you then ask "would you sleep with me for ?10?"

she says "NO! What do you think i am?"

you say "well we have established what you are, now we are just haggling on a price!"

Rocky Balboa 2

Simply Red wrote: »

"Did you know that theres 206 bones in the female body?"
"Really?"
"Yep, would you like 1 more?"

I'd assume you mean your finger in her body because the Penis doesnt have a bone in it..Just letting you know your in for dissapointment if you try that line

sorrywhat

tiger325 wrote: »

haha the best is to smile and give a wink

That'd work for me .

I think id laugh at a fella if he said some of the stuff in this thread. But I spose if you were only joking then it'd be a good conversation starter. But if you said it to the wrong girl.... definitly get a slap.

Crow71

May I insert my penis in your vagina?
Works every time

eddie.fandango

"There's a puppy in my van."

Gets 'em everytime.

NU8

johnny_knoxvile wrote: »

You ask a girl "would you sleep with Brad Pitt for ?500?"

to which she replies "of course i would"

you then ask "would you sleep with me for ?10?"

she says "NO! What do you think i am?"

you say "well we have established what you are, now we are just haggling on a price!"

That's just a Winston Churchill quote:

Churchill: Madam, would you sleep with me for five million pounds?
Socialite: My goodness, Mr. Churchill… Well, I suppose… we would have to discuss terms, of course…
Churchill: Would you sleep with me for five pounds?
Socialite: Mr. Churchill, what kind of woman do you think I am?!
Churchill: Madam, we’ve already established that. Now we are haggling about the price.

Still good though.

Boskowski

Seriously

These are just meant to be really funny, right? I mean there are not (apart from the fat sweater which seems to be some sort of classic), but I guess that's the idea anyway, right? Please say yes quickly...

Because if that's what you guys been using as your 'chat up line' in the real world I imagine you're all still virgins right? Or else it explains why so many women are so drunk in this country... They're practically forced to. Or else resign to a life of celibacy over the sheer idiocy of the local mating procedure...

I mean what's wrong with 'How you're doing?' or 'Can I buy you a drink?' and then have a pleasant chat? Why is everyone so determined to show off as a dumbass wannabe comedian when approaching a girl they presumably like?

Donny5

realcam wrote: »

Seriously

I mean what's wrong with 'How you're doing?'

Your grammar?

eddie.fandango

realcam wrote: »

I mean what's wrong with 'How you're doing?' or 'Can I buy you a drink?' and then have a pleasant chat?

WRONG!!

el_tiddlero

got any weed??

rarely leads to sex, but i get what i'm after