why do good guys finish last??

Belladonna

For the nice guys out there complaining , let me ask you this. If you are out and see 2 women and get the nerve to go up and talk to one of them, which one is it that you will chose? The beauty or her quiet slightly overweight, selfconscience, but very nice friend?
Be honest. How nice are you really?
If you keep gettting rejected, maybe you have just limited yourself to a smaller selection of women than you realize.

The Corinthian

CaptainPeacock wrote:

You see what I mean about watching too much TV? Loners tend to be murderers (or murderers turn out to be loners) on TV so that must be the case in real life? It's not.

Seeing as satire proved too complicated I’ll spell it out; Living with your mother and talking or meeting no-one outside of your immediate family is abnormal at pretty much any age.

Living with your mother, of course, is understandable when you’re a minor or even a young adult, but it should be frankly be raising eyebrows if you’re still doing so at thirty. As for talking or meeting no-one outside of your immediate family, this would be bizarre to the vast majority of people, so how you can make the statement that it is normal is beyond me.

Of course none of this is not to say that it does not happen, but it is neither your normal state of affairs nor is it a terribly well balanced way for an individual to develop or live.

DAEDULUS

Hmm,its hard to translate the situation in a formal tone
But I'll try my best not to get too offensive..

For the main question..Nice guys ALWAYS finish last in the case of hot girls,but there are plenty of ugly girls out there you can sweet talk and asslick into putting out,but only because they are not used to getting this kind of attention and they love it . The reason this will never work with a hot bird is because they get girls like you coming up to them EVERY DAY telling them how beutiful they are and offering to buy them ****.

Please cut the crap by the way, you dont really want the love of your life to just walk in the door just yet so you can treasure her and live your fairytale life with her..YOU WANT ACCESS TO SEX with hot girls,and sure if someone you get to love pops up along the way..grand
---

Stupidly enough, the first thing you hear from most guys is "to get birds you have to be an asshole",which is total bull**** of course,why would a girl want to go out with an asshole..?
What girls want is somebody who knows what to say and knows how to say it.

Knowing what to say is the most vital thing that exists,which,with hot birds is always what they subconciously what they want to hear,something unexpected and mean,NOT INSULTING,just a funny comment or two,hopefully making her reply with somethin along the lines of 'your so mean' and hitting you or some other ****e like that(this is where guys mix up being an asshole with being someone who knows how to get birds)

Knowing how to say it,mucho important..If you sound like Michael Jackson how do you expect to get anywhere with a girl,you dont sound manly and probably even worse,you dont even look manly to with it,portraying yourself as a wuss that gets nowhere with women.There are 2 major factors to do with knowing how to speak..
First:Being the dominant one,being a man,you cant just nod and agree with everything she says and tell her how right she is,unless ofcourse she is right and you do agree with everything :P Its even quite common where a girl will test you by saying something totally retarded and seeing if you will agree and hope thats what she wants to hear or be a man and show that you have an oppinion.
Second:Giving the impression that you can get a girl easily whenever you want.If a girl gets this impression,you have half the battle won and they,being a very curious specie will want to know what all the fuss is about.


wehey 200 posts in 4+ years

nesf

DAEDULUS wrote:

There are 2 major factors to do with knowing how to speak..
First:Being the dominant one,being a man,you cant just nod and agree with everything she says and tell her how right she is,unless ofcourse she is right and you do agree with everything :P Its even quite common where a girl will test you by saying something totally retarded and seeing if you will agree and hope thats what she wants to hear or be a man and show that you have an oppinion.

Eh, I'd disagree. I don't think that being dominant is a good thing. I think you need to be able to stand up for yourself, hold your own opinion on things and not be afraid to stand your ground on issues. But being dominant is not a good plan. You need balance in a relationship, one side dominating the other won't bring this.

DAEDULUS wrote:

Second:Giving the impression that you can get a girl easily whenever you want.If a girl gets this impression,you have half the battle won and they,being a very curious specie will want to know what all the fuss is about.

See, some guys can get away with that. They are naturally confident, smooth talkers etc etc. They can give the impression of pulling anywhere and they will be believed.

If some guy with no confidence, no social skills or who has no charisma tries to do the same then it just looks like he is an arrogant muppet who is delusional.

Of course, I suppose if the guy has no confidence, social skills or charisma, he's lucky to just hold her attention long enough to leave her get this impression.



The quicker guys realise that "quick fix, sure fire" solutions to women don't exist then the happier and better off they will be. Yes you need confidence, but confidence is something natural not something forced. Most (perceptive) people can spot the difference.

Also, people need to stop identifying and reinforcing themselves through their sex life. I mean seriously guys, pulling women isn't hard if you drop your standards and just pull anything that shows interest in you. That isn't the point and if you are still getting an ego boost out of it after your teenage years then you have issues.

There is no shame in being single or in not having someone to take to bed. Personally I'm happier single and getting a good night's sleep than I am after pulling some random uninteresting woman in a club and bringing her home for some sex of indeterminate quality.

Than again, maybe I'm just odd.

CaptainPeacock

The Corinthian wrote:

Seeing as satire proved too complicated I’ll spell it out;

There's no need for that, for a start.

Living with your mother, of course, is understandable when you’re a minor or even a young adult, but it should be frankly be raising eyebrows if you’re still doing so at thirty. As for talking or meeting no-one outside of your immediate family, this would be bizarre to the vast majority of people, so how you can make the statement that it is normal is beyond me.

Of course none of this is not to say that it does not happen, but it is neither your normal state of affairs nor is it a terribly well balanced way for an individual to develop or live.

Now that's better, as it's much different from saying that all isolated people are murderers. I'm glad you changed your mind.

nesf

CaptainPeacock wrote:

There's no need for that, for a start.

I believed you, then I read this:

CaptainPeacock wrote:

Now that's better, as it's much different from saying that all isolated people are murderers. I'm glad you changed your mind.

To clear things up:

sat·ire
n.

1.
1. A literary work in which human vice or folly is attacked through irony, derision, or wit.
2. The branch of literature constituting such works. See Synonyms at caricature.
2. Irony, sarcasm, or caustic wit used to attack or expose folly, vice, or stupidity.

From dictionary.com. Ever useful.

Victor

Take the wit, sarcasm and dictionary meanings to the English board.

Teddi

Teddi wrote:

hey...

well...why do they??..lol...

i am one of those good guys.......im genuine....treat women properly..(like princesses)....im good looking (not big-headed..been told by people).....

and through chain of events i always end last..lol....with girl etc.....

any other guys have this happen to them?

just be yourself. whether your the most ignorant b*****d in the world or the nicest guy in the world. i think if you can make a woman laugh your nearly there

Fast_Mover

don't take my advice too seriously.

CaptainPeacock its too late!!!
i sold my tv to the knackers and with the money i bought a dildo...hey if im gna be a spinster il need something!! :rolleyes:

Mist

This whole "Start a thread about how pathetic I am because I recently got shot down and am hoping to get sympathy which will in turn result in me getting a girl and not being pathetic" thing is NOT a good way to get a girl by the way.

nesf

Mist wrote:

This whole "Start a thread about how pathetic I am because I recently got shot down and am hoping to get sympathy which will in turn result in me getting a girl and not being pathetic" thing is NOT a good way to get a girl by the way.

No but it is a harmless way of getting it off your chest in a manner that's not likely to piss people off in real life.

It's better to post a thread about it here, than it is to "inflict" it on every aquaintance of yours in real life. That's just going to annoy people. At least on here, people have a choice about reading a thread. In real life they have to listen because most people are too polite to tell someone to shut up and stop whining. Most people mind you, not all!

The Corinthian

CaptainPeacock wrote:

Now that's better, as it's much different from saying that all isolated people are murderers. I'm glad you changed your mind.

As per what nesf pointed out to you. Please tell me you're being ironic when you said that.

mycroft

The Corinthian wrote:

Living with your mother, of course, is understandable when you’re a minor or even a young adult, but it should be frankly be raising eyebrows if you’re still doing so at thirty. As for talking or meeting no-one outside of your immediate family, this would be bizarre to the vast majority of people, so how you can make the statement that it is normal is beyond me.

Of course none of this is not to say that it does not happen, but it is neither your normal state of affairs nor is it a terribly well balanced way for an individual to develop or live.

I'm sorry, but could someone remind me which nationality in europe has the highest proportion of adult males living with the parents past the age of 25? Something in the region of 58%?

The Corinthian

mycroft wrote:

I'm sorry, but could someone remind me which nationality in europe has the highest proportion of adult males living with the parents past the age of 25? Something in the region of 58%?

Oooooo... he's so cute when he tries to troll :rolleyes:

mycroft

The Corinthian wrote:

Oooooo... he's so cute when he tries to troll :rolleyes:

Not trying to troll I was just commenting on the irony of you deriding someone for living at home as;

The Corinthian wrote:

neither your normal state of affairs nor is it a terribly well balanced way for an individual to develop or live.

when it is the normal state of affairs of the majority of 20yo' s/early 30yo males in Italy.

The irony is a little thick when you consider you were deriding a poster on the politics forum for making a broad sweeping accusation re "italian incompetence" which you took offence at, because it was a massive unfounded, unproven generalisation and slur at their national character.

But hey sauce for the goose etc.....

The Corinthian

mycroft wrote:

Not trying to troll I was just commenting on the irony of you deriding someone for living at home as;

No, you are attempting to troll. The situation in Italy is an anomaly when compared with the rest of the Western World and one that is commonly not considered to be psychologically a healthy state of affairs even there. Conversely, I think you would find it difficult to prove that it is the normal state of affairs in Ireland or the rest of the Western World, which if you could do actually would give you a valid point as opposed to ammunition for an obvious troll.

The irony is a little thick when you consider you were deriding a poster on the politics forum for making a broad sweeping accusation re "italian incompetence" which you took offence at, because it was a massive unfounded, unproven generalisation and slur at their national character.

What’s the connection between this ‘irony’ and what I said? Seriously, for something to be ironic it helps that there’s some relevance to the present subject. Actually, relevance to any subject might help. Presently, the only irony is your attempt to make an unrelated personal attack and then deny trolling.

Still, I still think you’re cute when you try trolling - not very subtle, but cute.

Beruthiel

mycroft wrote:

I'm sorry, but could someone remind me which nationality in europe has the highest proportion of adult males living with the parents past the age of 25? Something in the region of 58%?

mycroft
I don't see what that has got to do with the price of turnips
please keep on topic and stop baiting other posters
B

Sifo

nice guys dont finish last because theyre nice, im a nice guy and im always a good contender for first place.. put it this way "your standing at a bar, the place is packed, and theres a bunch of girls(i do have better words to describe them none of which are suitable for this time of the day)... do ya think they want to see a friendly guy looking over smiling and waving and bein nice?!!! the only ones that will want to take you home are the ones who are looking for a shoulder to cry on!!! take advantage of ya bein nice an all... be nice but be a little cheeky....they luv it!

Jaded Idealist

!!! take advantage of ya bein nice an all... be nice but be a little cheeky....they luv it![/QUOTE]

i've only discovered this recently...
being a nice guy is too often in our nature, we can't come off as a rogue with conviction. Whereas before, i used to get: 'Oh, he's so nice!' ..now they tend to be shocked at my dark side when i play cheeky. they see you alltogether differently.
still being a 'nice guy' i get to be playful in being flirtatious and they just play along not expecting me to have ulterior agendas...but i might.

CaptainPeacock

The Corinthian wrote:

As per what nesf pointed out to you. Please tell me you're being ironic when you said that.

No irony. You did change your mind.

But that's good because we didn't need your belittling a large section (larger than you think) of society by saying they'd have to be murderers to live the way they live. It's good that you decided to back off from that.

The Corinthian

CaptainPeacock wrote:

No irony. You did change your mind.

I didn't. I refer you to nesf's post on the topic of satire.

But that's good because we didn't need your belittling a large section (larger than you think) of society by saying they'd have to be murderers to live the way they live. It's good that you decided to back off from that.

I’ll try to explain this simply as you appear to be having difficulty comprehending:

The comment I made was satirical. As such it was specifically exaggerated so as to put forward a point, which is that the demographic you described is neither normal nor healthy on a psychological level.

But while we’re on the subject of delusional murderers, while a majority of loners (who often live with their mothers) are not delusional murderers, the majority of delusional murderers are loners (who often live with their mothers). One may thus be forgiven for suspecting that there is a connection there.

CaptainPeacock

The Corinthian wrote:

The comment I made was satirical. As such it was specifically exaggerated so as to put forward a point, which is that the demographic you described is neither normal nor healthy on a psychological level.

How do you know it's unhealthy? I don't think you know what you're talking about, in any case.

But while we’re on the subject of delusional murderers, while a majority of loners (who often live with their mothers) are not delusional murderers, the majority of delusional murderers are loners (who often live with their mothers).

Produce the proof of that please. Serial Killers might be psychological loners, but they are often married and appear to have a normal family life. They're certainly not always physical loners, like you implied.

I'd wager loners are in the minority when it comes to premeditated killings. For every Ed Gein there's a Harold Shipman, who was married, or a Charles Manson, who had a large "family." Then there's Fred and Rose West, Ian Brady and Myra Hindley, Ian Huntley and Maxine Carr. I think you're allowing the Psycho story to warp your view of real life.

Nevyn

back on topic you two,

Please read the charter,
Have a nice day,
Thaed

The Corinthian

CaptainPeacock wrote:

How do you know it's unhealthy? I don't think you know what you're talking about, in any case.

I think you’ll find that most psychologists will view a lifestyle with limited social interaction to be unhealthy. You will actually find that it is covered in any of the following books:

• Bowlby, J. (1953), Child care and the growth of love
• Blazer, D. G. (1982). Social support and mortality in an elderly community population. American Journal of Epidemiology, 115, 684-694.
• Matthews, A. M. (1991). The relationship between social support and morale: Comparisons of the widowed and never married in later life. Canadian Journal of Community, 10, 47-63.
• Pinquart, M., & Sorensen, S. (2000). Influences of socioeconomic status, social network, and competence on subjective well-being in later life: A meta-analysis. Psychology and Aging, 15, 187-224.

It seems apparent that you don’t have much of a clue of what you’re discussing.

Produce the proof of that please. Serial Killers might be psychological loners, but they are often married and appear to have a normal family life. They're certainly not always physical loners, like you implied.

It tends to be one of the things that psychologists look for in people suffering from Antisocial Personality Disorder - better known as Sociopathy or Psychopathy. For more information:

• Introduction to APD
• Without Conscience, Robert D. Hare, 1999

I'd wager loners are in the minority when it comes to premeditated killings.

Really? Prove it then or is wager a euphemism for assumption?

The Corinthian

Thaed wrote:

back on topic you two,

Sorry, I would but what this guy is peddling borders on irresponsible.

Gordon

The Corinthian wrote:

Sorry, I would but what this guy is peddling borders on irresponsible.

Ok, then you're banned for a week. This thread has been completely derailed thanks to you guys.

Nevyn

The Corinthian wrote:

Sorry, I would but what this guy is peddling borders on irresponsible.

well then take it to humanities asking for a thread split and move would have a better thing to do.

mycroft

The Corinthian wrote:

No, you are attempting to troll. The situation in Italy is an anomaly when compared with the rest of the Western World and one that is commonly not considered to be psychologically a healthy state of affairs even there. Conversely, I think you would find it difficult to prove that it is the normal state of affairs in Ireland or the rest of the Western World, which if you could do actually would give you a valid point as opposed to ammunition for an obvious troll.

You're the guy deriding some one for being

not (sic) terribly well balanced way for an individual to develop or live.

If it's not a common, and not commonly considered to be a healthy state of affairs you'll happily provide the evidence to support your claim.

Also, You're the one mocking and deriding someone with self confidence issues, and I'm trolling?

What's connection between this ‘irony’ and what I said? Seriously, for something to be ironic it helps that there’s some relevance to the present subject. Actually, relevance to any subject might help. Presently, the only irony is your attempt to make an unrelated personal attack and then deny trolling.

[off topic]

You're the one making a broad sweeping attack aganist people who live at home suggesting it's "unhealthy" and "unnaturally". However this is the common state of affairs for men in your home country till their mid 30s. On a recent thread you derided and attacked someone for making a sweeping generalisation aganist someone making a accusation aganist the population of Italy that they are invariably corrupt, and incompetent, yet here you are, claiming that people who live at home past a certain age are

not (sic) terribly well balanced way for an individual to develop or live.

which would seem you're attacking someone who derided a perceieved charactertistic of your countrymen, while attacking someone in a situation which does apply to a great of your countrymen.

Still, I still think you’re cute when you try trolling - not very subtle, but cute.

Oh yeah I'm cute when I deride your hypocracy, you're ignorant when you try to humilate someone with self confidence issues.

Victor

Um, banned.

Locked.

Take it elsewhere (or not).

kittenkiller

Nice guys don't finish last.
Boring, dull, non-charasmatic guys with whom you have no chemistry do.