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Greatest Comebacks Thread

  • 10-07-2019 4:40pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,829 ✭✭✭


    Hey All,

    Should be a bit of fun here.

    Idea is to post the greatest comeback comment you have ever heard.

    For example when someone says "Self praise is no praise" and the best response I've heard to that is "Tis better to have half a loaf than no loaf at all"

    I'm sure Pintman Paddy Losty and Johnny Flash should have a few gems here :pac:


«13

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,417 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    'F*ck you Deputy Stagg''


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,121 ✭✭✭amcalester


    Didn’t Kim Kardashian get cum on her back? That was a good one.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,477 ✭✭✭Comerman


    If you're waiting for my comeback look around your mother's inside leg


  • Posts: 5,311 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    "Liverpool beat Barcelona 4-0"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,874 ✭✭✭Edgware


    Comerman wrote: »
    If you're waiting for my comeback look around your mother's inside leg
    Or in her false teeth


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,305 ✭✭✭✭branie2


    Your Mamma's so fat that when she fell down the stairs, I thought Eastenders was starting.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 40,061 ✭✭✭✭Harry Palmr


    "Liverpool beat Barcelona 4-0"

    Now that was a snappy rejoinder!


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 67 ✭✭leitrim4life


    "you can't handle the truth!!"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,888 ✭✭✭Atoms for Peace


    Tiger Woods


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,357 ✭✭✭✭Birneybau


    "Shut up Becky"


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,357 ✭✭✭✭Birneybau


    branie2 wrote: »
    Your Mamma's so fat that when she fell down the stairs, I thought Eastenders was starting.

    Your mamma's so fat, I heard she just sits at home all day, crying.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,687 ✭✭✭Signore Fancy Pants


    "I'm eating my dinner Kate!".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,489 ✭✭✭Yamanoto


    Rip Torn died yesterday

    Thread reminded me of this



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,951 ✭✭✭✭Mam of 4


    Am I the only one who can never think of a great comeback when needs be , but think of brilliant ones later ? :(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,829 ✭✭✭tcawley29


    Mam of 4 wrote: »
    Am I the only one who can never think of a great comeback when needs be , but think of brilliant ones later ? :(

    I just started the thread for new material :cool:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,472 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    I may be drunk but in the morning I’ll also be ugly still - Neville Chamberlain


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,291 ✭✭✭lbc2019


    I know you are but what am I?

    A garbageman


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,472 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    You’re barking up the wrong Bush


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,926 ✭✭✭✭banie01


    When I was younger, fitter and prettier...
    My uncle started lecturing me on the dangers of drink, drugs and women!
    The lecture being delivered by a chubby, balding, whoremongering and hard partying musician ended with these lines...

    Him "Kid, your body is a temple! Mind it!"
    Me "Yeah, yeah, it's just a pity yours is a Greek one!"
    Him "What?!?!
    Me " fúcking ruined!!! "

    20 years later and we still slag each other over it....
    Im still winning too!
    I'm far from bald yet :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,408 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    ToddyDoody wrote: »
    'F*ck you Deputy Stagg''

    Easy there ,Paul.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,305 ✭✭✭✭branie2


    A classic comeback by Brendan Grace about a heckler at one of his shows, and I'm paraphrasing

    We were a duo known as the Symbolics. I was sym, he was the other half!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,076 ✭✭✭trashcan


    I may be drunk but in the morning I’ll also be ugly still - Neville Chamberlain

    Not quite. It was Churchill for a start, in response to some woman who said to him accusingly, "You're drunk" He replied, "Yes, but in the morning I will be sober, you however will still be ugly". Or something like that. It's a classic comeback to be fair, and I wouldn't be much of a Churchill fan.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,988 ✭✭✭griffin100


    One I read somewhere a few years ago......

    Lads on the street slagging off a fat kid as he walks past huffin and puffin trying to keep his tracksuit up. Turns back to the ringleader and says ‘the reason I’m so fat is because every time I ride your ma she gives me a cake afterwords.’


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,932 ✭✭✭✭Tell me how


    I may be drunk but in the morning I’ll also be ugly still - Neville Chamberlain

    Pretty sure it was Churchill.

    Man who also had following engagement with a fellow MP.

    Fellow MP: If I were your wife I'd put poison in your coffee
    Churchill: If I were your husband, I'd drink it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,507 ✭✭✭✭kowloon


    There was that legendary one from Pighead but I can't find it. So there's that.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,499 ✭✭✭IamMetaldave


    kowloon wrote: »
    There was that legendary one from Pighead but I can't find it. So there's that.

    Ah Pighead, so many amazing posts/threads.


  • Registered Users Posts: 552 ✭✭✭pawdee


    Once again, words fail you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,202 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    I envy everyone you have never met.
    ......


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,823 ✭✭✭✭Panthro


    If I wanted a decent come back I'd wipe your mother's chin.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5 totru kekka


    ive had one or two


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