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Long termers TTC

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12467…115

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    #92
    Roustabout
    Registered Users Posts: 33 ✭Roustabout


    Oh pennyloves you hit the nail on the head, silent grief is exactly what it is. I also find that I'm trying to sound convincing when I pretend like it's a choice that we don't have children yet. Maybe it helps me feel like, or be perceived that, I have control or something when in fact it's the one aspect of my life that I have absolutely no control over. If only they knew......


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    #93
    bobskii
    Registered Users Posts: 1,495 ✭✭✭bobskii


    Its tough and on our minds constantly. If only people knew the half of our thoughts they wouldnt b so flippant.a girl at work today asked me was I planning on having more children before i even answered she launched into giving out how her kids have destroyed her body but shes planning two more.i just stood there thinking in my head shut up shut up shut up!


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    #94
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    bobskii wrote: »
    Its tough and on our minds constantly. If only people knew the half of our thoughts they wouldnt b so flippant.a girl at work today asked me was I planning on having more children before i even answered she launched into giving out how her kids have destroyed her body but shes planning two more.i just stood there thinking in my head shut up shut up shut up!

    My sister in law, who had a lot of trouble getting pregnant herself, fell pregnant unexpectedly with her second baby around October of last year. When she was telling people, she was very much of the "OMG, if only it didn't happen this year, I mean next year would be so much better, it really doesn't suit now.........".
    I was astonished for so many reasons. First was my thinking that although I hadn't started trying just yet back then, it would be something I'd love to just happen. Second was that she had wanted a baby so so badly and tried for so long that you think she'd have been bloody delighted that it just happend this second time around.
    Now when I have been trying for almost a year I get so annoyed when I think of that conversation.


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    #95
    Hollywood130
    Registered Users Posts: 686 ✭✭✭Hollywood130


    carolinespring wrote: »
    I got a pack of Christmas cards today to support the fund raising for the local school and had a cry when it dawned on me that it is another Christmas that we will e sending out cards without the added baby name.

    I know exactly how you feel Caroline, was thinking the very same thing myself, bought 7 Christmas presents on Sunday for other peoples children, will I ever be buying for my own... very very hard. Your not on your own


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    #96
    Hollywood130
    Registered Users Posts: 686 ✭✭✭Hollywood130


    pennyloves wrote: »
    Caroline, my heart goes out to you because I felt the same today. My friend gave birth to her second child today and I just broke down when I read the text. I don't smoke but I had to have one this evening. No one understands, it's such a silent grief that you have to hide and carry around.

    Happened me too, an old school friend emailed me to tell me she was pregnant, total surprise for her, I nearly vomited on the screen, depressed then for the day. It's horrible and so hard to pick yourself up and get on with things.


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    #97
    bobskii
    Registered Users Posts: 1,495 ✭✭✭bobskii


    I hear ya Penny that is a bit mad!!My friend is always sayin to me oh its well for you can just go here and there at the drop of a hat it's different when you have children:mad:
    Firstly i'm understanding of the fact is tougher to organise yourself when you have kids and secondly she knows i'm struggling to get pregnant!:rolleyes:


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    #98
    Hollywood130
    Registered Users Posts: 686 ✭✭✭Hollywood130


    Oh my God why would anyone say that to you when they know you are trying to get pregnant???? Maybe it's her way of trying to make you feel a bit better. At this rate I'd be only too happy to organise my life around a baby!


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    #99
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    Hollywood130 wrote: »
    Oh my God why would anyone say that to you when they know you are trying to get pregnant???? Maybe it's her way of trying to make you feel a bit better. At this rate I'd be only too happy to organise my life around a baby!

    And then when you do get pregnant all of the "ohh hoo your life is over now - you'll never get that figure back - you'll be stuck at home for years now, hope you enjoyed that last holiday - you'll never sleep again"..... comments come your way.
    I hate those!:mad: If I manage to get pregnant and someone comes out with the above I think I'm just going to say, " you know what, I don't care. I've been trying for ages, I'm delighted I'm pregnant and if it is so bloody bad then why have you have X number of children?".


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    #100
    Hollywood130
    Registered Users Posts: 686 ✭✭✭Hollywood130


    Yes your right, just because they feel that way doesn't mean we will & we know we won't, we'll be savouring every moment! I will count my blessings everyday if I get to have one baby, I'll feel so lucky, I'll be happy to be awake every night!!!

    The whole figure thing is crap too, my sister has 5 kids and she's a size 8, shes amazing! Some people, like seriously what do they be thinking, saying things like that.
    Another Christmas with no little family of our own... it's so tough...


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    #101
    pennyloves
    Registered Users Posts: 113 ✭✭pennyloves


    This will also be our second Christmas without the one thing we crave for. I feel like the oldest swinger in town as Christmas Eve isn't the same anymore. It used to be a huge gang of us in the pub and now that has been reduced to almost nothing. I don't want to be out pretending that I am livng it up and enjoying myself - I desperately want a little one to make everything worthwhile. I sit there on nights out just looking around and thinking that I would kill to be at home with a gorgeous little baby asleep upstairs, talk about contentment. I would give anything to have my own little family and to enjoy the magic of Christmas again. I never ever thought I'd be in this position and the gnawing emptiness seems to be getting worse, maybe it's just because it IS another Christmas. I have really lost hope recently as it really feels like it will never happen. A few colleagues are getting married in the next few months and I am dreading their announcements while I have to put on a brave face.

    Sorry for the rant and buckets of self pity but life just seems so bloody unfair at the moment. Please God things will look up in the New Year.


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    #102
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    pennyloves wrote: »
    This will also be our second Christmas without the one thing we crave for. I feel like the oldest swinger in town as Christmas Eve isn't the same anymore. It used to be a huge gang of us in the pub and now that has been reduced to almost nothing. I don't want to be out pretending that I am livng it up and enjoying myself - I desperately want a little one to make everything worthwhile. I sit there on nights out just looking around and thinking that I would kill to be at home with a gorgeous little baby asleep upstairs, talk about contentment. I would give anything to have my own little family and to enjoy the magic of Christmas again. I never ever thought I'd be in this position and the gnawing emptiness seems to be getting worse, maybe it's just because it IS another Christmas. I have really lost hope recently as it really feels like it will never happen. A few colleagues are getting married in the next few months and I am dreading their announcements while I have to put on a brave face.

    Sorry for the rant and buckets of self pity but life just seems so bloody unfair at the moment. Please God things will look up in the New Year.

    Its funny how some things and some times of the year get to you more than others. A friend from work had her first baby a few weeks ago and I'm really genuinely happy for her. She had a long enough road herself to getting her baby so its also an inspiration for the rest of us I think.
    Anyway I bought some clothes for the baby and posted them the other day. Its was so hard, one of the outfits that I bought for when the little girl is 3-6 months old is a cream coloured pinafore with raspberry pink tights and a matching top. The heel bit of the tights is cream too. It was so super cute I wanted to keep it for the baby I don't even find myself pregnant with yet.
    :o:o:o


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    #103
    barbiegirl
    Registered Users Posts: 1,846 ✭✭✭barbiegirl


    Christmas is hell, no other word. The only joy I really get out of it is buying my nephews, nieces and friends babies pressies, but now the in-laws are talking about us not buying pressies for the kids. They don't get that that just upsets me so much cause what Christmas do we have if we can't even give the kiddies something. It's my bit of excitement watching others open gifts I've carefully picked out for them. Without that it's just another day.


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    #104
    bobskii
    Registered Users Posts: 1,495 ✭✭✭bobskii


    She's just tactless i think,doesn't engage her brain at times,at this stage i'm used to it altho i have been avoiding her this past while!!
    Christmas is a tough one alright i usually don't bother making a fuss but ya know what i think i will this year,it's potentially the last christmas where it will be just the 3 of us,next year it will be officially be 3 adults as my baby turns 18 next year:eek:

    Come january we will be starting our ivf so for now life needs to be as normal as possible!


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    #105
    carolinespring
    Registered Users Posts: 2,166 ✭✭✭carolinespring


    Well, I am out. Tested when I was 2 days late and that was a big fat no. Period arrived today :( Feeling pretty teary and crap.


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    #106
    stickybean
    Registered Users Posts: 1,582 ✭✭✭stickybean


    Day 46, no symptons, no signs and about 8 BFN, cracking up here.

    Have my procedure in 15 days. I am so stressed about it, which I know isn't helping.

    We put up our tree over the weekend, I was hanging up the stocking, got very sad, last year I was buying stuff in the sale, there was these fab Christmas stocking reduced and I bought 4 in the hope what we would need the extra one. I'd forgotten I bought it, but I remember back to that day in the shop thinking, surely we will need it, sure by then we would be 2.5 years trying, ah it won't take that long.

    I just feel like giving up the whole thing!!!


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    #107
    Hollywood130
    Registered Users Posts: 686 ✭✭✭Hollywood130


    I'm right there with you Caroline, mine arrived a week early on Saturday, another month, not pregnant, life is crap...


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    #108
    bobskii
    Registered Users Posts: 1,495 ✭✭✭bobskii


    Girls having your period makes you feel crap anyway . The added disappointed of not being pregnant multiplies it a million times more .

    I see sims are having an information morning on 1st December for anyone interested in going.


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    #109
    bobskii
    Registered Users Posts: 1,495 ✭✭✭bobskii


    Girls having your period makes you feel crap anyway . The added disappointed of not being pregnant multiplies it a million times more .

    I see sims are having an information morning on 1st December for anyone interested in going.


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    #110
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    I'm out too.


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    #111
    Hollywood130
    Registered Users Posts: 686 ✭✭✭Hollywood130


    It's not getting any easier guys is it... Mine came a week early like what is that about, always have a 27 day cycle, how annoying... god will it ever happen, feel like I'm in limbo land


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    #112
    hedgehog2
    Registered Users Posts: 317 ✭✭hedgehog2


    *mod note* Post had the best of intentions but understandably upset longterm posters to this forum.


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    #113
    stickybean
    Registered Users Posts: 1,582 ✭✭✭stickybean


    *mod edited*

    Can we please get this post removed, it is very insensitive to all the posters in the long term TTC

    Delighted for you friends and you and your wife but your post is not helpful at all, infact very upsetting. Myself and other posters come here to meet with people in similar circumstances, not to hear about people who have been lucky


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    #114
    Lucyfur
    Registered Users Posts: 32,513 ✭✭✭✭Lucyfur


    *edited*

    Ah heyor....


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    #115
    broody_kitten
    Closed Accounts Posts: 49 ✭broody_kitten


    *edited*

    I know you mean well, but there are fewer things more frustrating to hear for a couple having trouble conceiving than 'just relax and it'll happen'. It is a serious heartache and for people to swan in and say it's no big deal is a kick in the teeth... I am only at the start of my journey, I have no idea if I'll have problems conceiving or not but at least try to have a little sensitivity, some people here have genuine medical issues that you know nothing about.


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    #116
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    I tried so hard to reply to that post, but I know I'd get banned no matter how I phrase it.


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    #117
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    Neyite wrote: »
    I tried so hard to reply to that post, but I know I'd get banned no matter how I phrase it.

    Its one of those times when silence says much more than any words ever could.

    Caoline, I was really really sorry to see your post. I was (as I do for all the people here) really hoping you'd get some good news and have a brilliant Christmas on the back of it.

    It seems to be a strike out on all fronts at the moment.

    I'm still in my 2WW. According to the apps (which I now know are off by a week - 10 days) my period is due tomorrow. My boobs are quite tender for the past few days and if I didn't know that my cycle is where it is thanks to the OPKs I'd be driving myself silly wondering and thinking every twinge was "IT".
    I know it still could be but I'm not overly hopeful. I've set myself a reminder that my period (according to my new calculations) is due sometime around December 1-3. I might test on November 30th. That would be before its due but still in the time frame for being able to get a reliable result one way or another.
    Waiting is very hard to do. :(


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    #118
    hedgehog2
    Registered Users Posts: 317 ✭✭hedgehog2


    Hey there was no offence intended,
    Apologies if it upset a few people but that was not my intention.
    As I said good luck with it all and I hope many are successful with their needs.


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    #119
    ellavin
    Registered Users Posts: 193 ✭✭ellavin


    Hi has anyone any feedback on acupuncture? I heard it can help.. think I will give it ago


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    #120
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    ellavin wrote: »
    Hi has anyone any feedback on acupuncture? I heard it can help.. think I will give it ago

    I've been having acupuncture for a while now. I've had 7 sessions so far. While I am not pregnant yet I have noticed a change for the better since I started it.
    My cycle, although longer than your average (38/39 days long) has become more regular. My periods returned very quickly after being on the Pill for well over a decade but they were short and light. Now they are still short enough (2-3 days) but are heavier in a healty way.
    I had also experienced the development of bad skin (something I had never suffered with) on my jaw line, neck and chin areas that had gotten worse over the passing months. The acupuncture has helped clear this up massively. When I asked the acupuncturist why he said it is related to the endocrine system and the treatments were helping to regulate it and so my skin was clearing up.
    In another way having acupuncture has been very good for me mentally as it is very relaxing and destressing. I love it, especially if I have the last appointment on a Friday evening. Its the perfect way to wind down at the end of a busy work week. It has also helped me to feel that I've taken positive steps towards taking control of the situation around TTC.
    There is a thread on it here if you'd like to read it:
    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057056480


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    #121
    Parris83
    Registered Users Posts: 13 ✭Parris83


    Hello all,

    I know I already posted a thread, but since a few of you are chatting here; could I ask about early appointments with your doctors.

    All I have had done are my day 3 and day 21 bloods with my GP, the results showing I had not ovulated. We lost of baby through miscarriage in 2005 and have been trying to conceive for 7 years.

    We have our first appointment with Dr. Allen on Wednesday. I'm just looking for a rough idea on what may happen at the appointment.

    Any replies are really appreciated!

    Thanks :)


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