Anyone else fed up of dating apps?

AlphabetCards · 29-09-2019 11:03am

cjmc wrote: »

I have never used them . But the people I know that are / were on them are the vanest people I know. That's just them so don't take to heart anyone

Aye, tons of them. The obvious give away is that every photo of them is a selfie. It's generally a good sign if most of the photos are taken by others.*

*=caveat: if these photos are those awful, awful yoga poses against a scene, or someone rubbing an opiate-addicted tiger in SE Asia, then they are worse than the vain types.

MrFaul · 29-09-2019 11:25am

mikhail wrote: »

I've generally had more success in other countries. I don't know if that's because I'm foreign there (which adds a little air of exoticism), or if Irish women are bloody impossible, but I have my suspicions.

Ye if there's something that I've found disappointing about Ireland is the women. I often find Irish women to be egotisical, have a bad attitude and sometimes act more like men. Besides that, I find them to be generic: make up, hi heels, bubble gum talk... Now you've got feminist b.s. around.

Of course not all the women here are all like that, of course not, just a good portion of them
haha. The ones who are different, more individualistic are hardered to come across. For example when do you ever comes across an Irish female whose ladylike or elegant? It's very rare I tell you haha

the beer revolu · 29-09-2019 11:32am

MrFaul wrote: »

Ye if there's something that I've found disappointing about Ireland is the women. I often find Irish women to be egotisical, have a bad attitude and sometimes act more like men. Besides that, I find them to be generic: make up, hi heels, bubble gum talk... Now you've got feminist b.s. around.

Of course not all the women here are all like that, of course not, just a good portion of them
haha. The ones who are different, more individualistic are hardered to come across. For example when do you ever comes across an Irish female whose ladylike or elegant? It's very rare I tell you haha

Arsehole women behave like men = men are arseholes.

I'd say you're some catch.

Raconteuse · 29-09-2019 11:33am

There are other types of women besides the Love Island clones so stop going for them!

Church on Tuesday · 29-09-2019 11:34am

hank scorpio89 wrote: »

Only signed up for tinder today and you now have to pay too see who likes you ..yeah good luck with that .deleted it already

Yup pretty mental TBH.

I'm on dating apps but it's really not for me, much better (and fun) to chat to someone you fancy in real life.

ILoveYourVibes · 29-09-2019 11:35am

Raconteuse wrote: »

There are other types of women besides the Love Island clones so stop going for them!

Its true ....i made a male profile to see what the women were like ..they were ALL like that. SO not me

cj maxx · 29-09-2019 11:51am

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

Its true ....i made a male profile to see what the women were like ..they were ALL like that. SO not me

Aaw, that's just ruined my impression of you based on your name .

s7ryf3925pivug · 29-09-2019 11:59am

I found myself inundated with people wanting to date me. Very dateable people too. I wasn't in Dublin though a good portion of the women who contacted me were. Basically you need one nice photo and the ability to present yourself as a normal person. I'm not really really good looking or anything like that.

Earthhorse · 29-09-2019 12:09pm

BDI wrote: »

Just because you have a keyboard and a witty subject line doesn’t mean some model is going to fall for your charms. She still has to be seen in public with you.

Not true. I have no intention of leaving the house once hitched.

NewMan1982 · 29-09-2019 12:09pm

Blaire Tangy Saddle wrote: »

I found myself inundated with people wanting to date me. Very dateable people too. I wasn't in Dublin though a good portion of the women who contacted me were. Basically you need one nice photo and the ability to present yourself as a normal person. I'm not really really good looking or anything like that.

You need to watch out for the ones who want to go on a date within the first few messages.
They generally have several dates a week and the date feels more like a job interview.

Earthhorse · 29-09-2019 12:11pm

Raconteuse wrote: »

There are other types of women besides the Love Island clones so stop going for them!

Nothing less appealing, tbh.

I find there are a lot of fake profiles these days, way more than before, and they definitely change your view of what an a average woman should look like even though you know they’re fake. It’s an interesting but frustrating phenomenon.

Oasis1974 · 29-09-2019 12:14pm

But if she's pig ugly would you be bothered lads?

ILoveYourVibes · 29-09-2019 12:27pm

cjmc wrote: »

Aaw, that's just ruined my impression of you based on your name .

lord no ....hot yoga artsy chick

s7ryf3925pivug · 29-09-2019 12:28pm

NewMan1982 wrote: »

You need to watch out for the ones who want to go on a date within the first few messages.
They generally have several dates a week and the date feels more like a job interview.

I wouldn't be into developing something online because you don't really know them, so it's largely imaginary. Might be no chemistry in person. I did keep chatting for a good while to some people who were not local, but that was just because I enjoyed chatting to them. If I liked someone nearby I just met them for a coffee or a drink as soon as convenient. Keep everything easygoing, no buildup or pressure. Don't remember any job interviews. Mainly positive experiences.

NewMan1982 · 29-09-2019 12:32pm

Blaire Tangy Saddle wrote: »

I wouldn't be into developing something online because you don't really know them, so it's largely imaginary. Might be no chemistry in person. I did keep chatting for a good while to some people who were not local, but that was just that I enjoyed chatting to them. If I liked someone nearby I just met them for a coffee or a drink as soon as convenient. Keep everything easygoing, no buildup or pressure. Don't remember any job interviews. Mainly positive experiences.

I don’t mean text endlessly either. I wouldn’t be into meeting someone online without a week of texting to build up a rapport.

I have come across some ladies who want to date almost immediately and I’ve felt that we hadn’t even got a rapport yet. Like literally 5 texts in. I see turning up on a date in that situation as a risk. I’m not into wasting my time like that.

The most recent example I said it to her that she was coming across as a serial dater and she denied it. Turns out I would have been her third date that week.

Oasis1974 · 29-09-2019 12:32pm

Would you agree there is a good chance there ugly simply because they need to use a dating app?

completedit · 29-09-2019 12:32pm

Tinder takes the romance out of dating but you can find some good ones on there. Problem is that it’s so hard for a guy. Everything is stacked against you; women’s preferences, the algorith, you can’t look too much like a **** boy but you can’t look too square either, finding the right pictures are impossible. Because girls don’t just look at the guys looks, they look at what kinda lifestyle a life with the guy may entail.

gwalk · 29-09-2019 12:34pm

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

Its true ....i made a male profile to see what the women were like ..they were ALL like that. SO not me

Strange behaviour making fake internet profiles

ILoveYourVibes · 29-09-2019 12:40pm

gwalk wrote: »

Strange behaviour making fake internet profiles

Yup....i even chatted to some people ....im very very strange

ILoveYourVibes · 29-09-2019 12:41pm

Oasis1974 wrote: »

Would you agree there is a good chance there ugly simply because they need to use a dating app?

No...there are some curiosities ...as to why some people use them. Maybe its just tough to find a special someone in this day and age.

IAMAMORON · 29-09-2019 12:45pm

Unless you are really attractive and have no problem meeting with multiple partners they are fairly useless, especially if you are heterosexually active. I mention this because the cruising apps have appeared to be a lot more successful with gay men in particular.

If you are a hetero sexual male who does not look like a boy band star they are completely useless, women will not select you without a picture and if you get cute trying to look cute you wont make it past the dinner table. Sad but true.

That is not to say that picking up sexual partners is any more easier without them, but it can become less systematic and cold. For example if you frequent the same bars or clubs etc it gives potential partners the added advantage of getting to know you over time, this helps a lot. Dating by nature can be a difficult exercise, what to do, where to go, what to say ,what not to say, they are a minefield.

It can be a lot easier forming a connection with a partner who you might see 3 or 4 times a month, at a similar venue or event, it allows to develop chemistries and invigorates things, like crushing or fancying someone, much more exciting.

gwalk · 29-09-2019 1:01pm

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

Yup....i even chatted to some people ....im very very strange

At least you admit it, plenty dont

Ubbquittious · 29-09-2019 1:29pm

AlphabetCards wrote: »

Again, why are you letting these conversations go on like that? You are literally putting yourself at the mercy of others. Few messages, suggest a pint, and wait for a response. If they aren't interested, then why bother? At least demonstrate some value and ignore him/her if all they want to do is interrogate you. If they fancied you they would jump at the chance to go for a drink.

I don't go down that road with them anymore. What happens usually is I exchange a few nice messages with them and then they fcuk off or else they start stalling the ball and making excuses when the time to go on a date rolls around. I don't experience any of this nonsense with the ones I meet in real life the only reason I still go on the apps is to have my name in the hat I suppose

voldejoie · 29-09-2019 2:07pm

I've been sick of the dating apps for years, but it's very hard to meet people without them.

I'm a lesbian and the pool is very, very small to begin with. Every time I get fed up with the apps and delete them, I realise they really are the option in terms of meeting people, the best of a bad lot

Thelonious Monk · 29-09-2019 2:23pm

I suppose I'm pretty good looking and tall and in good shape and have no baggage and my own house etc etc, and being 39 women in their mid 30s tend to see me as a decent prospect! So it was always easy for me to go on dates whenever I wanted, although I could only handle being on the apps for a couple of months at a time. I spent a few years doing that but never really met anyone I liked enough until not too long long so I would think it was worth it in the end. It's good if it works for you but I can imagine it can be pretty tough for those without thick skin.

BorneTobyWilde · 29-09-2019 2:32pm

Thelonious Monk wrote: »

I suppose I'm pretty good looking and tall and in good shape and have no baggage and my own house etc etc, and being 39 women in their mid 30s tend to see me as a decent prospect! So it was always easy for me to go on dates whenever I wanted, although I could only handle being on the apps for a couple of months at a time. I spent a few years doing that but never really met anyone I liked enough until not too long long so I would think it was worth it in the end. It's good if it works for you but I can imagine it can be pretty tough for those without thick skin.

Thelonious Monk · 29-09-2019 2:33pm

Oh I'm far from perfect underneath it all

cannotlogin · 29-09-2019 2:34pm

Thelonious Monk wrote: »

I suppose I'm pretty good looking and tall and in good shape and have no baggage and my own house etc etc, and being 39 women in their mid 30s tend to see me as a decent prospect! So it was always easy for me to go on dates whenever I wanted, although I could only handle being on the apps for a couple of months at a time. I spent a few years doing that but never really met anyone I liked enough until not too long long so I would think it was worth it in the end. It's good if it works for you but I can imagine it can be pretty tough for those without thick skin.

It would be your modesty that would suck me in!!!!!!

NewMan1982 · 29-09-2019 2:35pm

cannotlogin wrote: »

It would be your modesty that would suck me in!!!!!!

He’s a compulsive liar

Thelonious Monk · 29-09-2019 2:36pm

Oh and play an instrument well, chicks dig that

NewMan1982 · 29-09-2019 2:50pm

Thelonious Monk wrote: »

Oh and play an instrument well, chicks dig that

Is it the flute?

Raconteuse · 29-09-2019 3:22pm

Eircom_Sucks wrote: »

Amazing looking women on them and they up their own holes

Amazing looking women on a dating app = bat sh1te crazy

I feel ur pain op

All the “ any genuine men here “ headlines and in reality they after a geordie shore reject

Just like the men going for them, who are going for an "amazing looking" Geordie Shore reject.

Partially your fault if you keep going for women like that.

mikhail · 29-09-2019 4:16pm

Raconteuse wrote: »

Just like the men going for them, who are going for an "amazing looking" Geordie Shore reject.

Partially your fault if you keep going for women like that.

Men are not the picky ones on dating apps. There's tonnes of data to show that.

Raconteuse · 29-09-2019 4:20pm

mikhail wrote: »

Men are not the picky ones on dating apps. There's tonnes of data to show that.

Yet it's always the same type of woman they talk about. The Love Island ones.

Mister Vain · 29-09-2019 4:22pm

I haven't been on a "date" since I had POF on the desktop. Back then you had to put a bit of effort into it, now you just swipe away on your phone. I usually just get ghosted on the apps.

mikhail · 29-09-2019 4:29pm

Raconteuse wrote: »

Yet it's always the same type of woman they talk about. The Love Island ones.

If you want to focus on the toxic minority who focus on the toxic minority, you may be part of the problem.

Airyfairy12 · 29-09-2019 4:42pm

Eircom_Sucks wrote: »

Proper cnuts to be honest

I think its yourself that might be the problem.
Why would any woman be interested in a man to refers to women as crazy, stuck up and cnuts?

Maybe sort out your attitude and you might have better luck.

killanena · 29-09-2019 4:54pm

Met my missus on Bebo back in the days. Talked for a couple of weeks on it, met up when we were teens. Together sense. Never been on a dating app or website but I've friends who specially if out on a night out with would go on tinder looking for a one might stand and sometimes with success.

Im happy that I don't have to bother with all that crap.

killanena · 29-09-2019 4:54pm

Met my missus on Bebo back in the days. Talked for a couple of weeks on it, met up when we were teens. Together sense. Never been on a dating app or website but I've friends who specially if out on a night out with would go on tinder looking for a one might stand and sometimes with success.

Im happy that I don't have to bother with all that crap.

Raconteuse · 29-09-2019 5:08pm

mikhail wrote: »

If you want to focus on the toxic minority who focus on the toxic minority, you may be part of the problem.

How the heck would I be part of the problem?
And the toxic minority is always what gets focused on.

billyhead · 29-09-2019 5:17pm

Folks, What would you consider the best dating site (payed or otherwise) apart from Tinder.

S.G.M. · 29-09-2019 5:26pm

Try online dating in the North West of the country where we are forgotten about. Add all the normal issues to a severe lack of people.

gwalk · 29-09-2019 5:27pm

S.G.M. wrote: »

Try online dating in the North West of the country where we are forgotten about. Add all the normal issues to a severe lack of people.

You have internet down there??

S.G.M. · 29-09-2019 5:28pm

gwalk wrote:

You have internet down there??

Just about.

Mister Vain · 29-09-2019 5:49pm

billyhead wrote: »

Folks, What would you consider the best dating site (payed or otherwise) apart from Tinder.

Bumble is daycent. Girls have to message first, which means you don't have to be "original" and "witty." People on it seem to take it more seriously compared to Tinder.

S.G.M. · 29-09-2019 6:03pm

I'm 25 and not a bad looking fella but I'm not the type where a woman will take a second look and I find online dating quite poor. I'm in a rural enough area so not close to any of the major cities in Ireland. Ive personally never had any luck with matches or replies from the women I want to get to know but I know people that get on quite well. The best looking people get on the best (obviously) but I've firmly veered away from online dating sites now and am focusing on real world interactions.

Hithere246 · 29-09-2019 6:04pm

There are several types on internet dating.. people who want to hook up (dick pic within 3 messages), people who will never settle cos they're addicted to messaging 10 different people at a time, and those who are genuine and want to meet someone genuine. I'm sure there are more categories if anyone cares to enlighten me. What I do notice over a year on is that it's the same people still on the same sites

Ubbquittious · 29-09-2019 6:46pm

Hithere246 wrote: »

There are several types on internet dating.. people who want to hook up (dick pic within 3 messages), people who will never settle cos they're addicted to messaging 10 different people at a time, and those who are genuine and want to meet someone genuine. I'm sure there are more categories if anyone cares to enlighten me. What I do notice over a year on is that it's the same people still on the same sites

Do they still send those despite them being known to be ineffective?

Elessar · 29-09-2019 7:02pm

I'm a guy and I found Tinder a good bit of fun. I'm mostly conditioned at this stage for most conversations to wither and die but there's always a few where they will meet you. I found it's important to ask them out quick, i.e. same day or within a couple of days and don't drag out the conversations. At least you both know where you stand. Try not to take it too seriously.

Yeah most dates were once offs or you might meet the girl a few times but they sort of fade away then for various reasons.

I did meet my last girlfriend thanks to Tinder (not Irish which might be a factor) when I wasn't even looking for a relationship and she was the real deal. Beautiful, smart, kind, loving, considerate, fun and she was such a breath of fresh air. We stayed together for 2.5 years and even lived together. I never would have met her if it wasn't for Tinder. It didn't work out in the end but I realise now what I lost - god I'd marry her now if I had the chance! Point is, there are genuine amazing people on it. I had been on countless dates before I met her. It's a numbers game really!

I'm back on it now and it's not nearly as good as a few years ago. It was always a feast or a famine for me - I'd get nothing no matches or dates for months at a time and then BAM in one week I'd have 3 dates set. But now it's all different, maybe there's just more competition on it but I haven't had as much success. It's the only way I can meet the opposite sex so I'll keep persevering!

So it's not all bad ladies and gents

S.G.M. · 29-09-2019 7:04pm

Elessar wrote:

I did meet my last girlfriend thanks to Tinder (not Irish which might be a factor) when I wasn't even looking for a relationship and she was the real deal. Beautiful, smart, kind, loving, considerate, fun and she was such a breath of fresh air. We stayed together for 2.5 years and even lived together. I never would have met her if it wasn't for Tinder. It didn't work out in the end but I realise now what I lost - god I'd marry her now if I had the chance! Point is, there are genuine amazing people on it. I had been on countless dates before I met her. It's a numbers game really!

I'm actually sad now after reading that. Thanks Elessar.

Anyone else fed up of dating apps?

Comments