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Male Masseuse

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Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,994 ✭✭✭sullivlo


    If it was an accidental brush of an erection I would be a bit miffed. If it happened again, I would say it. Erections can happen spontaneously (I guess, I don’t own a penis). If my masseuse had an erection and it touched off me, I would be uncomfortable, but it wouldn’t be disastrous. If he did it immediately again, then I would complain.

    Accidents happen. Repeated accidents are not accidents.

    I had a sports massage on my glute* last year. It was really tight and the physio needed to approach it from various angles. One of those angles resulted in my foot coming into contact with his groin. This was through no fault of him - he needed to get into a specific location and my foot did engage with his penis. But we were grown ups about it.

    Had it been erect, it would have been a problem.





    *fun fact - glute autocorrected to flute.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,659 ✭✭✭✭ted1


    Are we sure it was an erect penis and not a phone or similar in the pocket ? Or just a large flacid penis.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,694 ✭✭✭✭osarusan


    A guy can't help it if he gets an erection, it's involuntary.

    But I'd expect any masseuse in that situation would be ultra-conscious of their penis making contact with the client, and surely the default assumption is that it's going to make a client feel uncomfortable if contact (repeated contact) is made.

    I think it's extremely unlikely that the masseuse either didn't notice the contact, or didn't imagine it would likely make the client uncomfortable.

    The whole thing may have been unintentional, or at least, unavoidable, considering the extent of contact in a massage. And it could have mortified the masseuse also, of course.

    One problem is that they seemingly didn't make any effort to communicate that to their client (awkward though that conversation would have been). If he works out of a well-known establishment with a decent reputation, I wonder if there is some 'best practice' in terms of how to deal with it. I wouldn't think that 'just ignore it/pretend it never happened' is best practice.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,484 ✭✭✭✭AndrewJRenko


    pwurple wrote: »
    Hey guys, is my penis in your ear bothering you?
    Pardon?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 115 ✭✭M.m.m.


    panda100 wrote: »
    I've been going to the same male masseuse for the last 3 months for a full body massage. I play a lot of sports and this guy is pretty strong so he gets into all the knots. He works out of a well know massage parlour in my city and is well experienced.

    In the first session he put a towel over my breasts while he massaged my stomach and shoulders. He then said do I want him to massage my full chest, under my breasts etc. I have no problem with nudity etc so said yes. He took off the towel and massaged my chest which included my breasts. At no stage did I feel anything sexual whatsoever about this. It was just apart of a good full body massage. Had another massage from him last month, same thing again and it was fine.

    This evening he gave me a full body massage again, towel came off my breasts again after he asked if I wanted full chest massage. Any who, for the remainder of the massage I could feel his erection anytime he moved against me. It was extremely uncomfortable! I did not know what to do.

    I said it to my friend and she was appalled about the whole thing. She said it is not right for a male masseuse to massage a women's chest like that. As I said up until the erection this evening I never felt like there was anything sexual about it.

    Anyone with similar experiences? I'm so annoyed as he really gave a great massage and my sports times are improving as a result. Would like to know others thoughts and experiences of male masseuse if any?


    Hi there,


    I was going to a woman for massage but she got cancer and is now recovering so I picked up a flyer about a guy and I too need a sports massage due to partaking in sports as well.


    Anyway the first time was grand, Im used to the pain and I was looking forward to getting a male massage due to their strength and getting the knots out. I told him I mainly want my legs done and knew I may need my back done since it usually starts in the back or glutes so I was okay about that.


    The second time I went he asked me to remove my bra, I was okay about that as I was gripping the towel around my chest and felt like I got to know him a bit better.


    Then towards the end of the massage he was massaging around my clavicle, i just had this feeling that he was edging towards my chest. He also took it upon himself to tuck the other towel into the front of my bottoms himself. I was talking to my sister and telling her I felt a bit uneasy around him but she was saying sure what else is he supposed to do, you're going for a massage.



    Yesterday I went for a massage again thinking it was all in my head and I need to chill out a bit since my leg is quite tight I tend to need massages so need to get over it.


    We were a bit into the message again and this time he asked me have I ever done massage. I said no and he said that's a pity we could give each other massages. I still was okay about that but then he went to massage my stomach and was saying something about the area around the hip being nice and then he went to the clavicle again. He then said out of the blue ''do you want me to massage your breasts''.

    I just said no, then I said I don't like anyone touching me. Then I felt confused. I was wondering if this was a regular thing he does with all his clients and I'm just being paranoid. It was so matter of fact, in the next sentence he was telling me how tight my neck was.


    Anyway I got up and was leaving and I noticed the door was locked, fair enough. Then we got outside and the waiting room door was also locked. Jez, i couldn't wait to get out and was pressing the bell instead of turning the key but was acting cool all the same.


    I was speaking to my friend who massaged for years and she said you don't go near the groin or breasts.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    panda100 wrote: »
    Personally I thought the breast massage was really good from that point of view. He wasn't touching the nipples or anything. It was just under the breast and at the side and then sweeping down my chest. This area can get sore when you're wearing bra's all the time especially with sports. I swim a lot so it's very beneficial to have the sides of my chest massaged.

    Iv'e met the masseuse in the gym since this incident. Now I'm starting to think was it all in my head and maybe what I felt wasn't what I felt :confused: I think the breast massage thing just made me hyper vigilant about it all.

    Have any of the "Outraged" people on here seen this post by the OP ?
    I know it wouldn't fit into the agenda that some people are trying to shoehorn (ahem) into the thread......

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,758 ✭✭✭Pelvis


    greenspurs wrote: »
    Have any of the "Outraged" people on here seen this post by the OP ?
    I know it wouldn't fit into the agenda that some people are trying to shoehorn (ahem) into the thread......

    Which agenda is that? The one where people say a guy shouldn't be rubbing his hard cock against a woman he's massaging?

    OP got a breast massage, didn't feel it was sexual in the slightest.

    Next time OP gets a breast massage, she thinks she feels the guys erection on more than one occasion. Suddenly, and logically, OP feels there may be a sexual element to the massage and feels uncomfortable.

    It's not difficult.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    Pelvis wrote: »
    Which agenda is that? The one where people say a guy shouldn't be rubbing his hard cock against a woman he's massaging?

    OP got a breast massage, didn't feel it was sexual in the slightest.

    Next time OP gets a breast massage, she thinks she feels the guys erection on more than one occasion. Suddenly, and logically, OP feels there may be a sexual element to the massage and feels uncomfortable.

    It's not difficult.

    "rubbing " ? How do you know he rubbed it?
    Because the OP is now unsure it even happened !?
    Anyway, work away on the insinuations and maybe's ......

    :rolleyes:

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,057 ✭✭✭.......


    greenspurs wrote: »
    "rubbing " ? How do you know he rubbed it?
    Because the OP is now unsure it even happened !?
    Anyway, work away on the insinuations and maybe's ......

    :rolleyes:

    And how do you know he didnt?

    Anyway, work away on the insinuations and maybes.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    Not sure what your point is greenspurs... it's fairly normal for someone experiencing something weird, out of the ordinary, to doubt themselves, and start to think maybe it didn't happen.

    It's well documented as part of the way our brain protects us from stress and traumatic experiences generally. It's called disassociation or plasticity.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    pwurple wrote: »
    Not sure what your point is greenspurs... it's fairly normal for someone experiencing something weird, out of the ordinary, to doubt themselves, and start to think maybe it didn't happen.

    It's well documented as part of the way our brain protects us from stress and traumatic experiences generally. It's called disassociation or plasticity.

    Oh wow....
    Theres a reach ...
    Next you'll be saying that it might be Post Traumatic Stress !!

    Girl cutting my hair , she touched my shoulder, and both elbows with her boobs - Is that the same ??

    My point is the OP posted that she wasn't sure , and that all theposters that got outraged on her behalf, and seemed to be more upset than she was !!

    Erections happen, and MAYBE it rubbed off her while the guy was reaching over, or MAYBE he was touching it off her - and that's wrong.


    Or maybe it wasn't as bad as she originally thought ? We will never know for sure, so calm down with the accusations and insinuations and exaggerations just for dramatic effect !!

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,057 ✭✭✭.......


    greenspurs wrote: »
    Oh wow....
    Theres a reach ...

    I thought the idea around here was that we take the posts at face value and not try to discredit someone or deny their experience?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    ....... wrote: »
    I thought the idea around here was that we take the posts at face value and not try to discredit someone or deny their experience?

    So my posts can be contradicted, but I cant do the same ?? How does that work ?? Surely rational (well, fairly rational) debate is the idea on message boards !
    ( I nearly typed mAssage board !! :) )

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,057 ✭✭✭.......


    greenspurs wrote: »
    So my posts can be contradicted, but I cant do the same ?? How does that work ?? Surely rational (well, fairly rational) debate is the idea on message boards !
    ( I nearly typed mAssage board !! :) )

    You are contradicting the reported experience of the OP and suggesting its all about an agenda.

    You actually stated "how do you know he rubbed it".

    This is not contradicting a post - this is contradicting a reported experience.

    Its fair enough to say, well maybe he didnt mean to touch off you - and a number of people have said that. But you are actually trying to suggest it didnt happen at all. Can you not see the difference there?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    ....... wrote: »
    You are contradicting the reported experience of the OP and suggesting its all about an agenda.

    You actually stated "how do you know he rubbed it".

    This is not contradicting a post - this is contradicting a reported experience.

    Its fair enough to say, well maybe he didnt mean to touch off you - and a number of people have said that. But you are actually trying to suggest it didnt happen at all. Can you not see the difference there?


    No, no I'm not saying that. Not once did I say that. Why would I doubt her ? I have suspicions both ways, but they don't count, as they are only suspicions. . I only asked why people were just about crying Rape about this going on the same suspicions/evidence.

    I posted that the OP stated that she was unsure that it happened, that she doubted herself after the initial feeling that he was rubbing his erection on her, and that means that should be taken into account.

    I then asked the person/persons why they were insinuating that the masseur was doing it intentionally and was getting off on it. THAT was what I questioned.
    How/Why do they think that ? How could they suspect someone on the strength of what was posted before , and then subsequently doubted by the OP.

    Maybe you cant see the difference........

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,057 ✭✭✭.......


    ....... wrote: »
    You actually stated "how do you know he rubbed it".
    greenspurs wrote: »
    No, no I'm not saying that. Not once did I say that.

    eh:
    greenspurs wrote: »
    "rubbing " ? How do you know he rubbed it?
    ... :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    "How do you know he rubbed it" as in ..

    The op posted "I could feel his erection anytime he moved against me" ...

    The other posters then surmised that he was rubbing it against her, and I asked the OTHER POSTERS, not the OP , - "How do you know he rubbed it" .

    Simple !

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    For Example - Post #10 ......

    "Surely this is unwanted sexual contact? We're talking about rubbing an erection against an unconsenting client.

    Isn't that a minor sexual assault? "..........


    That's the kind of crazy stuff I was questioning !! The poster of Post#10 says "WE'RE" - speaking on everyones behalf) talking about RUBBING AN ERECTION .......

    The poster got that from reading this "I could feel his erection anytime he moved against me" ....

    NOT AT ALL is it the same thing!! Not at all nice to happen, but not as bad , seemingly as the other posters tried to make it !!!

    I hope you can understand it now ????

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,057 ✭✭✭.......


    greenspurs I am not going to drag the thread any further off topic by debating with you on whether or not what happened was intentional. Only the masseuse knows for sure, no one else.

    However I am strongly of the opinion that it was not an accident as a penis is not some kind of rubber limb that you are unaware of the location of. A single touch might be accidental. Repeated touches are not. The OP reported she could feel it "anytime" he moved against here - thats not accidental and frankly it is a preposterous to suggest it is.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    greenspurs wrote: »
    Oh wow....
    Theres a reach ...
    Next you'll be saying that it might be Post Traumatic Stress !!

    For someone saying everyone else is over sensitive... you really like the old exclamation points and overreactions. :rolleyes:

    No reaching needed, the brain generally tries to protect itself from harm. Not an entirely shocking concept surely.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,688 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    pwurple wrote: »
    For someone saying everyone else is over sensitive... you really like the old exclamation points and overreactions. :rolleyes:

    No reaching needed, the brain generally tries to protect itself from harm. Not an entirely shocking concept surely.

    Great point there .
    Grammar Nazi .

    Yes the brain does, but I didn't know you could diagnose that through Boards.
    Anyway , carry on with the supposing and guess work .
    you are very entertaining.

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... " #NoPopcorn



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