Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

mickstupp · 01-03-2016 12:49am

Doc is good, but I'm resistant to a lot of things.
Rest is not on the cards, I'm afraid. Terrible insomnia for the last 5 months. Busy busy busy tomorrow.
The busy-ness is actually very good for me, because it makes me feel productive, which is a positive thing and gives me energy to do other things. It's the quiet moments that kill me. When I stop to take a breath and everything underneath (or rather the nothing underneath) comes crashing back to the surface.

Gremlinertia · 01-03-2016 1:22am

mickstupp wrote: »

Doc is good, but I'm resistant to a lot of things.
Rest is not on the cards, I'm afraid. Terrible insomnia for the last 5 months. Busy busy busy tomorrow.
The busy-ness is actually very good for me, because it makes me feel productive, which is a positive thing and gives me energy to do other things. It's the quiet moments that kill me. When I stop to take a breath and everything underneath (or rather the nothing underneath) comes crashing back to the surface.

Everyone's path is unique to them, being productive helps me too however i do need to 'step out' and breathe every so often. Glad to hear you have a relationship with your doc though, so many suffer alone still. Hope you catch the odd break from the insomnia..

Lady is a tramp · 01-03-2016 12:45pm

Aaaaand it begins. A very mild, easygoing group session on an unemotive topic. I end up bursting into tears and running from the room.

Where I was staying last month was much, much stricter. I would have been MADE "stay with the pain" and sit there crying until I could talk again. And then they'd dig even deeper and make me more and more upset.

Here I'm allowed run to a distant part of the hospital, take some time alone to calm down, and will probably be treated with kid gloves for the rest of the week.

Hard to know which approach is better. The tough "stay with the pain" one ended in a psychiatric breakdown, but I'm not sure going easy on me is the right approach either. Because then how will I ever address and resolve my issues.

I cried almost every day on the last programme. Most days I haven't cried since this admission. In fact I've been all happy and breezy and I think the other patients have been wondering why I'm here at all.

I'm stupid stupid stupid. I didn't even have to open my big fat stupid mouth, I should have known I'd only get upset and make an idiot of myself.

Wtf is wrong with me.

Gremlinertia · 01-03-2016 1:21pm

One of the biggest things people in our boat face is the fact that we can be our own worst enemy. Giving out to yourself is usually not warranted, but a default that every human has. Take some time Lady, breathe and talk later.

carzony · 01-03-2016 2:21pm

Went out earlier and all of a sudden I got so breathless I couldnt even talk and chest pains which is unusual for me. Ended up breaking red lights, overtaking cars and dangerous speeds just to get home. Jesus I got some fright.

Doing anything is leaving me feeling like i'm suffocating..

Bed for the day is the only thing for me now.... Not in the mode to even talk to anyone.

Things are seriously getting worse. Think it's time to consider seriously strong medications and psychiatric treatment.

Lady is a tramp · 01-03-2016 2:24pm

Would in-patient treatment be an option for you carzony? Give you a bit of breathing space? I really feel for you.

carzony · 01-03-2016 2:47pm

Lady is a tramp wrote: »

Would in-patient treatment be an option for you carzony? Give you a bit of breathing space? I really feel for you.

I'm not sure what to do right now. Even when i'm relaxed and 'normal' I still feel strange as if i'm trapped all the time. My anger and stress levels are through the roof also. I just thank god i've no real responsibilities or anyone depending on me.

Another thing that got to me was a friend was talking about joining linkedin and of course I had to go look at old friends, classmates ect.. It's a real eye opener to see how empty my life/ work experiences/education is compared to others. I'm only 24 end of March but my god I feel so old and exhausted.....

StripedBoxers · 01-03-2016 5:39pm

I hope you are okay Carazony and I hope you get the help you need soon

In a serious down-mood today.

Sick of having things turned back on me when I'm not in the wrong, being snapped at, barked at, etc.

I haven't even done anything.

I need to win the lotto so I can move out and live alone pronto. The peace and quiet would be unreal. It would be like a permanent holiday.

get a room · 01-03-2016 5:42pm

badboyblast wrote: »

You are very brave and keep it up.

auto pilot

ongarboy · 01-03-2016 7:34pm

Hi all.
Recent lurker to this forum as I wanted to seek out solidarity from those who understand what I’m going through which is a fairly constant feeling of anxiety. I was even anxious about posting here under my username as I was afraid that those who may be familiar with me elsewhere on Boards or anyone who’d google me on Boards would see this and then associate me with a mental health condition and what a stigma that would be….eh?? I also had a concern that coming here (and I’ve visited this thread a lot in the last couple of weeks) would somehow encourage me to wallow in my condition and somehow use the forum as an excuse to go on “poor me” rants and have some of you validate such rants and which could start making the thread addictive for me for the wrong reasons (ie seeking the company of misery/pity/sympathy validations). I’m confident for me that the positives of this thread will far outweigh any perceived negatives I had or may have.

I can however see a lot of very brave individuals coming here and posting about how they are truly hurting right now or in the recent past and how they even just have the wherewithal to post about that. Those posts alone mean you are not suffering in silence. Your honesty and courage is what is inspiring me and doesn’t make me feel alienated and alone (of which I’ve so often felt in the past).

I left a great, very well paid, top of career job 3 years ago due to extreme work related anxiety and tricked everyone into thinking I was taking a career break to go travelling for a year which of course was a far more socially acceptable “why are you leaving?” response rather than say “I can’t face this job or any new job”. Anyway, with some therapy and fabulous group support work with CrossCare during that year off, I mustered up the strength and courage to fight my anxiety and go back and find a job in my industry ( a different company, similar job) hoping I could use the coping mechanisms and tools I acquired through therapy to endure this new job. You’ve all heard the Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway malarkey…. I lasted two years that included 2 one month absences due to work related anxiety before I had to quit again before Christmas to save myself from descending further down a black hole of anxiety. I'm so mad and angry that 20 years of education, qualifications and working hard to ascend to the top has all being wasted but my sanity had to come first. My therapist congratulated me when I guiltily admitted I handed in my notice and said that I should feel empowered for owning that decision to leave an environment that was stressing me out. I’m still not sure if it’s me or my anxiety that “owned” it.

Anyway, 3 months later and I’m back job hunting again and trying to focus on completely different industries but my CV is only geared towards the industry I’ve always worked in. I’m now applying for completely unrelated jobs hoping that working in a different field will not cause me such anxiety and stress. I’m not sure how successful that will be but I guess the fact I’m doing it all is a good thing, right? I’m hating having to job hunt as I equate work with anxiety for as long as I remembered and this job hunting feeds into the anxiety. However, I get more stressed out by doing nothing and feeling guilty about doing nothing so I popped off a couple of CVs today. Not sure I’d even want the jobs I’m applying for but there is a slight feel good feeling already for doing something productive as applying for jobs I guess.

Anyway, apologies for the long post – hadn’t planned, just kept on typing. I just wanted to introduce myself and say well done to all of you for expressing yourselves so honestly. Even if you feel your posts do not help yourself, it may help someone else who’s reading and that has to be a good thing.

Hugo Stiglitz · 01-03-2016 7:46pm

ongarboy wrote: »

Hi all.
Recent lurker to this forum as I wanted to seek out solidarity from those who understand what I’m going through which is a fairly constant feeling of anxiety. I was even anxious about posting here under my username as I was afraid that those who may be familiar with me elsewhere on Boards or anyone who’d google me on Boards would see this and then associate me with a mental health condition and what a stigma that would be….eh?? I also had a concern that coming here (and I’ve visited this thread a lot in the last couple of weeks) would somehow encourage me to wallow in my condition and somehow use the forum as an excuse to go on “poor me” rants and have some of you validate such rants and which could start making the thread addictive for me for the wrong reasons (ie seeking the company of misery/pity/sympathy validations). I’m confident for me that the positives of this thread will far outweigh any perceived negatives I had or may have.

I can however see a lot of very brave individuals coming here and posting about how they are truly hurting right now or in the recent past and how they even just have the wherewithal to post about that. Those posts alone mean you are not suffering in silence. Your honesty and courage is what is inspiring me and doesn’t make me feel alienated and alone (of which I’ve so often felt in the past).

I left a great, very well paid, top of career job 3 years ago due to extreme work related anxiety and tricked everyone into thinking I was taking a career break to go travelling for a year which of course was a far more socially acceptable “why are you leaving?” response rather than say “I can’t face this job or any new job”. Anyway, with some therapy and fabulous group support work with CrossCare during that year off, I mustered up the strength and courage to fight my anxiety and go back and find a job in my industry ( a different company, similar job) hoping I could use the coping mechanisms and tools I acquired through therapy to endure this new job. You’ve all heard the Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway malarkey…. I lasted two years that included 2 one month absences due to work related anxiety before I had to quit again before Christmas to save myself from descending further down a black hole of anxiety. I'm so mad and angry that 20 years of education, qualifications and working hard to ascend to the top has all being wasted but my sanity had to come first. My therapist congratulated me when I guiltily admitted I handed in my notice and said that I should feel empowered for owning that decision to leave an environment that was stressing me out. I’m still not sure if it’s me or my anxiety that “owned” it.

Anyway, 3 months later and I’m back job hunting again and trying to focus on completely different industries but my CV is only geared towards the industry I’ve always worked in. I’m now applying for completely unrelated jobs hoping that working in a different field will not cause me such anxiety and stress. I’m not sure how successful that will be but I guess the fact I’m doing it all is a good thing, right? I’m hating having to job hunt as I equate work with anxiety for as long as I remembered and this job hunting feeds into the anxiety. However, I get more stressed out by doing nothing and feeling guilty about doing nothing so I popped off a couple of CVs today. Not sure I’d even want the jobs I’m applying for but there is a slight feel good feeling already for doing something productive as applying for jobs I guess.

Anyway, apologies for the long post – hadn’t planned, just kept on typing. I just wanted to introduce myself and say well done to all of you for expressing yourselves so honestly. Even if you feel your posts do not help yourself, it may help someone else who’s reading and that has to be a good thing.

Welcome to the thread!

No apologies for lost posts needed in here, friend!

Yeah job hunting can seriously mess with your emotions, especially if you are already prone to any bit of depression and/or anxiety.

A lot of us have either gone through or are currently going through what you are there. I hope you keep posting here. It's a great safe place for advice and support.

get a room · 02-03-2016 5:27am

another long night of smokes and tea.

Gremlinertia · 02-03-2016 5:40am

Hey Getaroom, how are the injuries coming along? Nights are hard, do you read or are you stuck with the sleeplessness?

Lady is a tramp · 02-03-2016 6:42am

Just had a dream that my hairdresser made me pee in a saucepan to do a pregnancy test, I asked for the results but she said I'd have to wait til they were announced in group therapy ... LOL!

Better than my nightmares of the last few nights anyways!

Gremlinertia · 02-03-2016 6:56am

Those off the wall dreams are such a relief aren't they?. You can wake and laugh at them..

Lady is a tramp · 02-03-2016 7:00am

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Those off the wall dreams are such a relief aren't they?. You can wake and laugh at them..

Haha no I went and asked the night nurse for a sample container just in case!

While rambling on about hairdressers and saucepans, I think she thought I was sleepwalking!

Anyways wide awake now for the day. Might get up and dressed and read a book for a while, even though breakfast isn't til half eight.

What has you up? General insomnia?

Gremlinertia · 02-03-2016 7:09am

I work nights actually, think it may have been because of the insomnia i ended up here!.

trixychic · 02-03-2016 10:56am

So went to my counsellor yday. She announced that she felt I could continue on my own.... still not sure how I'm feeling but surely she wouldn't say it unless she saw I was ready.... right???

Other then that I am wrecked. Oh started his course last wk. 5 days a wk... which means no more lie ins and me dealing with all household things including school stuff, bills and my sons assessment for asd.

I'm coping so far and feeling positive about it... so far. Although today will be a slow day. Feel sooo tired.

Still not sleeping at night though. Everyone said "if your busy during the day you'll sleep at night".... well since last Tue I haven't even sat down for lunch til oh comes home at half 4... the night's don't get Better though. Maybe I need to keep getting more tired??

Wow what a wk.

Hugo Stiglitz · 02-03-2016 9:50pm

I'm wrecked too, TC.

I'm just trundling through the weekdays to get to the weekend. The weekend means a little respite. I can hide from the world for a little while. But then it starts all over again.

StripedBoxers · 03-03-2016 5:04am

Can't stop crying.

Turtle_ · 03-03-2016 9:33am

StripedBoxers wrote: »

Can't stop crying.

Sorry to hear.. Anything in particular or just sad?

Lady is a tramp · 03-03-2016 10:04am

My consultant wants me to start doing an hour by hour mood diary. This should be interesting ...

carzony · 03-03-2016 3:24pm

Doctor actually called me back. He made up a referral letter for me but I couldn't hear who he's sending me too.

Hugo Stiglitz · 03-03-2016 4:29pm

carzony wrote: »

Doctor actually called me back. He made up a referral letter for me but I couldn't hear who he's sending me too.

Glad to hear that he finally got back to you, C.

carzony · 03-03-2016 6:52pm

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

Glad to hear that he finally got back to you, C.

Thanks

As time goes on, I think it's best as things are getting worse. I'm in bed right now felling very strange and doing any activity is very difficult.

I've been walking the dogs around the local park for the guts of a year now and still i'm very nervous and reluctant to walk the whole park as it brings me from home. Just at the stage where i'm exhausted, angry and simply had enough.

Really am ready to try anything. Have to see the GP on Monday so i'll defo need to start on some kind of strong medication to try and contain these symptoms.

Last time, I tried the pills I was going around high as a kite but i'd take that over the crap i'm going through now.

Hugo Stiglitz · 03-03-2016 6:53pm

carzony wrote: »

Thanks

As time goes on, I think it's best as things are getting worse. I'm in bed right now felling very strange and doing any activity is very difficult.

I've been walking the dogs around the local park for the guts of a year now and still i'm very nervous and reluctant to walk the whole park as it brings me from home. Just at the stage where i'm exhausted, angry and simply had enough.

Really am ready to try anything. Have to see the GP on Monday so i'll defo need to start on some kind of strong medication to try and contain these symptoms.

Last time I tried the pills I was going around high as a kite but i'd take that over the crap i'm going through now.

*bro-hugs*

Hang on in there, friend. You'll get the help you need there soon.

Juxtapose · 03-03-2016 8:27pm

^^ Good to hear the doc got back to you Carzony. The fact you are ready to take the next step to finding your comfortable place is encouraging. Keep going, you're doing great.

I've had a pretty bland week. Skipped college (which made me feel guilty, but i couldn't face it) but got things done that needed to, without too much enthusiasm.

My anxiety has subsided and no panic attacks in a while. But with that i just feel totally empty of emotion. I've avoided any triggers and just basically shut myself off, which has helped but its not healthy. I actually can't wait to meet with my counsellor tomorrow, which i guess is a healthy sign.

Trying to keep the positives in check.

Hugo Stiglitz · 03-03-2016 8:34pm

Juxtapose wrote: »

^^ Good to hear the doc got back to you Carzony. The fact you are ready to take the next step to finding your comfortable place is encouraging. Keep going, you're doing great.

I've had a pretty bland week. Skipped college (which made me feel guilty, but i couldn't face it) but got things done that needed to, without too much enthusiasm.

My anxiety has subsided and no panic attacks in a while. But with that i just feel totally empty of emotion. I've avoided any triggers and just basically shut myself off, which has helped but its not healthy. I actually can't wait to meet with my counsellor tomorrow, which i guess is a healthy sign.

Trying to keep the positives in check.

I hope you get on well tomorrow, J.

Juxtapose · 03-03-2016 9:04pm

Thanks Hugo!

I hope your week is going well and that you can relax and enjoy the weekend

Hugo Stiglitz · 03-03-2016 9:39pm

Juxtapose wrote: »

Thanks Hugo!

I hope your week is going well and that you can relax and enjoy the weekend

It'll be nice to have some time to relax. I hope yours is good there too.

Euphoria Intensifies · 03-03-2016 11:02pm

Hey everyone. Hope you're all having an okay evening.

This has been a pretty busy week for me. I started some part time voluntary work which has been okay so far. It looks like I'm going to be starting the proper DBT course in September, so that will be good, even though it is going to be a big commitment (2 hours group session and 1 hour individual session every week as well as homework). I'm kind of worried about how I'll manage it alongside college (which I'll be starting back at the same time and will be full time pretty much).

Having a proper routine is going to be really helpful for me I think, so I'm glad to have started the bit of work. Getting out of the house and being social is a really big thing for me too as I'm a classic extrovert - being around people really gives me energy. I'm going to focus on planning my routine and keeping on top of my PLEASE skills etc over the next while (I've been doing some DBT skills with the nurse since last year, but just random ones, mainly distress tolerance. Just in case any of you were wondering why I know some skills before having started lol).

Lady is a tramp · 03-03-2016 11:38pm

Lady is a tramp wrote: »

My consultant wants me to start doing an hour by hour mood diary. This should be interesting ...

Wow, I would really recommend this. I filled this in religiously every two hours today using a template I found online, rating different emotions in each two-hour period from 1-10, and with notes on what I was doing and how I felt at the time.

The fluctuations are crazy! It's really interesting. It'll be great to see my counsellor tomorrow and actually show her on paper what goes on with me on a typical day, instead of just saying that I have a lot of mood swings and panic attacks.

Euphoria Intensifies · 04-03-2016 12:05am

That's great that you're finding it useful LIAT - think I'll have a go at tracking mood swings too. Mine haven't been as bad since I've been on the split dose of quetiapine, but they get so out of hand if I'm remotely stressed out.

Lady is a tramp · 04-03-2016 12:18am

Euphoria Intensifies wrote: »

That's great that you're finding it useful LIAT - think I'll have a go at tracking mood swings too. Mine haven't been as bad since I've been on the split dose of quetiapine, but they get so out of hand if I'm remotely stressed out.

I'm on no medication for now. The consultant wants to see what my moods look like over a few weeks with no meds etc, but while I'm in the safe environment of the hospital.

I mentioned earlier that I'm not on meds (didn't say why) and one of the other patients made a bitchy comment about what am I doing in hospital then if I'm not even unwell enough to need medication. Other patients have made bitchy comments about me being too happy and friendly, or about the fact that I get up and dressed and do my hair and makeup and am busy and active every day.

Lots of smiling and nodding involved on my part. F*cking hell, some people can be judgemental. Just because my proble4ms aren't the same as theirs doesn't mean that they're not extremely serious.

Most people here are lovely though, I guess there'll always be the odd one like that!

bridgettedon · 04-03-2016 12:31am

Yah we can't control other people. Maybe something to remember is that mental health issues can change our personality so try not to take things personally. It's good that the majority of people are lovely.

I remember you posting earlier that this hospital isn't using the tough love approach, compared to your previous hospital experiences. I don't react well to tough love. It makes everything so hard and lets face it, life can be pretty ****ty at the best of times. I prefer the soft, slow approach which mainly I have experienced from health professionals. There is a healthy balance between the two that can be used. I am glad that this current experience is going well, it shows that maybe their approach is better suited for you.

StripedBoxers · 04-03-2016 12:37am

Turtle_ wrote: »

Sorry to hear.. Anything in particular or just sad?

A few things and a bout of depression as well.

Irreparable falling out with someone close to me and its starting to hit me now.

I started a daily/nightly journal which is helping somewhat not much though.

I need long-term counselling, but I know my review appointment in April the Dr who is assessing me will hand me a prescription instead of putting me forward for counselling.

He's incredibly dismissive and seems to think that high doses of strong medications over a long term period is the answer to all problems. Gobshíte.

mickstupp · 04-03-2016 12:38am

Binge eating for hours now. And for the first time I don't feel a single bit guilty about it. I enjoyed the Chinese. I enjoyed the large packs of minstrels, and the apple tart, and the f***ing pizza too, and everything else. F*** it. I am now going to bed and it'd be nice if I slept for a few days. Or even a single goddamn hour without waking up, that'd do. Tired. The world can sod off.

get a room · 04-03-2016 6:25pm

mickstupp wrote: »

Binge eating for hours now. And for the first time I don't feel a single bit guilty about it. I enjoyed the Chinese. I enjoyed the large packs of minstrels, and the apple tart, and the f***ing pizza too, and everything else. F*** it. I am now going to bed and it'd be nice if I slept for a few days. Or even a single goddamn hour without waking up, that'd do. Tired. The world can sod off.

Everyone was in bed by 10.30 last night. I made a cup of tea took 2 xanax and a 10mg stillnoct. I woke up at 1.30 and headed straight to bed.
I woke up first this morning after an ok nights sleep, came downstairs to let the dog out. The sitting room light was still on. I went in to turn it off, on the coffee table was an empty packet of pringles, empty pack of creamcrackers, empty container of coleslaw and an empty bottle of baileys.
Sh1te - I hope I enjoyed it..................

Lavinia · 04-03-2016 7:25pm

Binge-eating used to hit me the worst in the late evening e.g. after 9pm so at one stage I remember I would go to sleep before this urge would get the better of me, and would get up at 5 in the morning but I would feel good.
This worked for a while but not anymore though. Thinking of trying to re-introduce this rhythm into my life again and see if it helps. Loved waking up at 5am with all the silence around..

bridgettedon · 04-03-2016 9:49pm

I'm quite annoyed by someone. I'm trying to keep my temper under check so I don't say something I regret. It is really hard..

Hugo Stiglitz · 04-03-2016 11:56pm

Mood has seriously dipped and the anxiety/assorted emotional issues has heightened the last few days. Too much ****ing stress.

I'm increasingly finding that I'm good at nothing: relationships, work, learning, self-improvement etc. My forte seems to be rubbing people the wrong way and getting rejected and/or disliked immensely. I really don't know how I'm doing this but I'm the only common thing in all these interactions with various people, so obviously it's my ****ty personality.

bridgettedon · 05-03-2016 12:22am

That was my experience as well Hugo. I seemed to repel people. I knew I looked a normal person but I didn't act like other people my age. So people used come up and chat to me but then they kinda stayed at a distance. I feel like depression and anxiety warp your personality. It's hard to hold a conversation when you are socially anxious and have low self-esteem. At my lowest I had no one by side except my family. Now I have developed friendships and get on with people at work. A huge difference compared to 2 years ago. I thought I was the issue before, I thought I was a horrible human being. However now I see that wasn't who I really am. I was sick and it affected my personality, my moods and my behaviour. I think sometimes other people feel that we don't like them and take it personally, that is why they get rubbed up the wrong way. Also concentration and learning abilities are affected by mental health issues. Add in work stress and it is a recipe for disaster. What I'm saying is that your life has turned out this way due to mental health issues, it is not due to you. Your mental health will improve and you will see a big change in your life. Try and think back to a time when you were good at doing something, try and remember having confidence and not being overcome by anxiety. It doesn't matter if it was 10 years. You will feel like that again someday.

Hugo Stiglitz · 05-03-2016 12:31am

bridgettedon wrote: »

That was my experience as well Hugo. I seemed to repel people. I knew I looked a normal person but I didn't act like other people my age. So people used come up and chat to me but then they kinda stayed at a distance. I feel like depression and anxiety warp your personality. It's hard to hold a conversation when you are socially anxious and have low self-esteem. At my lowest I had no one by side except my family. Now I have developed friendships and get on with people at work. A huge difference compared to 2 years ago. I thought I was the issue before, I thought I was a horrible human being. However now I see that wasn't who I really am. I was sick and it affected my personality, my moods and my behaviour. I think sometimes other people feel that we don't like them and take it personally, that is why they get rubbed up the wrong way. Also concentration and learning abilities are affected by mental health issues. Add in work stress and it is a recipe for disaster. What I'm saying is that your life has turned out this way due to mental health issues, it is not due to you. Your mental health will improve and you will see a big change in your life. Try and think back to a time when you were good at doing something, try and remember having confidence and not being overcome by anxiety. It doesn't matter if it was 10 years. You will feel like that again someday.

Thanks for the reply there, B. I really appreciate it.

There's plenty of food for thought there. I tend to go from 0 to 60 instantly in terms of negativity. Haha

bridgettedon · 05-03-2016 12:48am

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

Thanks for the reply there, B. I really appreciate it.

There's plenty of food for thought there. I tend to go from 0 to 60 instantly in terms of negativity. Haha

Well that my opinion but someone may have a different viewpoint which you may identify with more. I remember going in to work feeling like ****, feeling stupid, feeling that everyone hated me. It was hell on earth. It was just horrible. I hate that others are going through that right now. At the moment I work in a job where there is no stress as it's only a development type job so I may be feeling the same pressures in a different job in the near future. I get so stressed very quickly as well. I also start second guessing every single thing that is said to me, then I lose concentration, then I make mistakes, then I think I'm stupid, then I think others think I'm stupid. It's a never ending cycle of stress and anxiety. Even thinking of my previous job gets me wound up as you can see from this post.

If people are being nasty to you then fcuk them. Honestly try and not give them a second thought.

Hugo Stiglitz · 05-03-2016 1:04am

bridgettedon wrote: »

Well that my opinion but someone may have a different viewpoint which you may identify with more. I remember going in to work feeling like ****, feeling stupid, feeling that everyone hated me. It was hell on earth. It was just horrible. I hate that others are going through that right now. At the moment I work in a job where there is no stress as it's only a development type job so I may be feeling the same pressures in a different job in the near future. I get so stressed very quickly as well. I also start second guessing every single thing that is said to me, then I lose concentration, then I make mistakes, then I think I'm stupid, then I think others think I'm stupid. It's a never ending cycle of stress and anxiety. Even thinking of my previous job gets me wound up as you can see from this post.

If people are being nasty to you then fcuk them. Honestly try and not give them a second thought.

No, your previous post really hit the nail on the head.

I'm delighted to hear that you're getting on well in work there.

I'm extremely prone to such spiralling thoughts too.

StripedBoxers · 05-03-2016 2:55am

Absolutely horrendous few days for me.

Been depressed all day, spent half of the day in bed unable to get up because I couldn't face it.

Rang my occupational therapist to see about getting a last-minute appointment next week, I hope I can.

Fcuk anxiety and depression, fcuk them to hell and beyond.

La.de.da · 05-03-2016 3:35am

Truly sorry to hear some of you are are suffering. I hope things improve for you all.

I'm managing ( I think ) very high anxiety and low moods the last few weeks.
Meditating trying to relax a bit. Just taking things day by day.

Lady is a tramp · 05-03-2016 4:16am

So, roll call ... who's awake?

I think I'm awake now for the night. I also think I may have freaked out the nurses after waking up after a bad dream and not knowing if I was asleep or awake.

Want to get up and showered and dressed now but it's a bit too early, they'll think I'm weird. (Er.) I'll try to hold off until five.

Going to try to see a doctor on call tomorrow if I can. I wanted to stay medication free but I'm scared to sleep ... I need something that'll make me sleep but not dream ...

Hugo Stiglitz · 05-03-2016 12:48pm

StripedBoxers wrote: »

Absolutely horrendous few days for me.

Been depressed all day, spent half of the day in bed unable to get up because I couldn't face it.

Rang my occupational therapist to see about getting a last-minute appointment next week, I hope I can.

Fcuk anxiety and depression, fcuk them to hell and beyond.

La.de.da wrote: »

Truly sorry to hear some of you are are suffering. I hope things improve for you all.

I'm managing ( I think ) very high anxiety and low moods the last few weeks.
Meditating trying to relax a bit. Just taking things day by day.

Lady is a tramp wrote: »

So, roll call ... who's awake?

I think I'm awake now for the night. I also think I may have freaked out the nurses after waking up after a bad dream and not knowing if I was asleep or awake.

Want to get up and showered and dressed now but it's a bit too early, they'll think I'm weird. (Er.) I'll try to hold off until five.

Going to try to see a doctor on call tomorrow if I can. I wanted to stay medication free but I'm scared to sleep ... I need something that'll make me sleep but not dream ...

Hope the weekend goes well for ye all there. x

Gremlinertia · 05-03-2016 9:56pm

Jaws are trying to clamp shut.. Haven't missed meds or been under any extra pressure so I'm pretty frustrated with this..

Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

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